His journey was filled with desperate prayers said for the well-being of Kyu, his calls to Seoul were not being entertained, it was harsh but he knew that it was being done so that at least he would safely reach the hospital. He was sure that in the event something untoward did occur to kyu he would not continue to live.

After landing, he literally rushed through the airport complex to the car that had been kept in waiting. When he entered the car Ji hoon said that it was best if he could wait to speak to the doctor himself to ascertain the position of Kyu.

The hospital was abuzz with the media swarming like bees outside it. He was escorted to the hospital by a back door exit; he had his face covered until he reached the floor Kyu was in. The closer he was getting to his destination the heavier his footsteps were turning, he feared if he would even be capable of reaching kyu’s room. All the accumulated fear filled with anguish and anxiety broke out of his calm façade that he was so direly trying to maintain so as not to put unwanted pressure on anyone on his account.

The view he saw broke him completely, it was as if someone had taken an extremely heavy rock and hit him with it on the head. Kyu….. His beloved Kyu….his darling kyu…was lying in a bed surrounded with many doctors and nurses fussing over him, with grotesque apparatuses being connected to his body. His small lithe figure was hardly visible from all the tubes coming out of him. He could hardly bear to see his vibrant and mischievous kyu lying almost lifeless on the hospital bed.

In these pressing times he knew he had to talk to the doctor to get an update about kyu’s condition but he could not take his eyes away from the person lying there, his mind was busy inspecting every inch of the person lying on the bed to confirm that it was indeed his kyu.

          He started with the legs and moved upward because he knew he would be unable to keep standing if he saw the other's face first. His feet were thankfully alright with minor abrasions on them, the left calf was wrapped in white bandage that was slowly being turned crimson by the blood that had managed to escape from the confines of their veins through the torn skin. He slowly moved upward but a white sheet placed covering his thighs and pelvis had obscured his view but he was relived at least that part was left unharmed. His torso was a completely different story; it was fully covered in red bandages with places that had tubes sprouting from his ribs and chest. His arms appeared to have strange growth on them with budges and depressions in the most unusual places. Even his hands were not spared by the tube attack. Siwon was mustering courage as he was nearing the face of the most beautiful creature he had set his eyes on.

His face…the person on the bed shared very little to Siwon’s kyu, because he was yet to see him so….so devoid of life. The skin had turned into ashen white as though there was not an ounce of blood coursing through his veins, he looked like a mannequin, an inanimate object that had no life force in it. This was so drastically different to his vivacious, lively and loving kyu. He could still remember the hint of blush that colored his cheeks whenever siwon was near him, being daft that he is, siwon needed quite a lot of hints to realize the love that kyu had for him. The great matchmaker Heechul had literally blurted out their mutual feelings for each other in front of everyone in a drunken revelry that ended the stolen glances and touches they shared when they thought the other was not watching. However siwon was glad that everything was in the open, but embarrassed that he had shied away from confessing his feelings to kyu and that their declaration of love was done by a third person and that too in public.

Before going to America he had planned a whole magical evening for them where he would formally ask him to be his and only his. It was his way of making sure everyone knew that kyu and he were exclusive; a warning for others who should not even dare to look at his baby with wrong intentions. But now watching the figure lying on the bed he could not believe that it was indeed his kyu. His face was more or less covered by a mask that had tubes going into his chest and also to a machine which seemed to be providing air to keep him alive.

While gazing at kyu, siwon felt a hand on his shoulder, he turned to find the owner of the hand and was greeted by heechul with red puffy eyes and equally red runny nose. It was then he realized that he was not alone, his brothers who were waiting at a distance when he arrived were now standing in a circle around him each one bearing the same marks of sadness. When he saw them, all his defenses came crumbling down and he cried; cried pouring all his sadness; his guilt for not being there with kyu at such a delicate time. Those of his brothers who felt his pain soon joined in his sobs and the whole floor of the hospital reverted from a symphony of grief and sorrow, a mournful melody that was enough to break the heart of anyone watching this tight knit group of brothers crying out their anguish.

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