“No, hyung! For the 100^th and last time, NO!” Youngjae slams the door behind him, making the walls of their old building rattle. It doesn’t deter Himchan though, as the older simply flings it open again and bears down on the younger boy.

“Why not?! We did the same thing for everyone last year, now it’s just your turn again!” Himchan shouts, just as loudly and making the walls vibrate all the same.

Youngjae exhales loudly, angrily, as he turns to face Himchan. “Because, believe it or not, I don’t want you to organize me a damned birthday party!”

Hurt flashes through Himchan’s eyes and Youngjae regrets his words immediately. He runs a hand through his hair, frustrated. It’s hard to believe that Himchan could be so thickheaded and oblivious. (Except, okay, maybe not, but Youngjae thought he had been plenty obvious).

Himchan’s eyes are narrowed and Youngjae doesn’t miss the rapid blinking, as if to keep unwanted tears from spilling over. “Fine, then.” The older male says, voice strained, and then he turns to stalk out the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Youngjae lets out a big sigh, fists clenching and unclenching. He wishes he could flip things or break them. He makes himself calm down, taking a deep breath before going off to pursue Himchan. An angry hyung was not a nice one and hurting Himchan was the absolute last thing he wanted to do.

He opens the door gently now; silently apologizing to it in his head for all the abuse it’s had to endure. He sees Himchan sprawled over their living room couch, face buried within the cushions. No one else seems to be around; probably (hopefully) all safely evacuated when their argument had broken out.

Youngjae closes his eyes and prays for patience before approaching Himchan. His voice is soft and careful when he speaks.

“Hyung…”

Himchan doesn’t move, shows no signs of having heard Youngjae and the younger just settles on the couch within the crook of his body. The couch is already fully taken up with Himchan lying on it, but Youngjae manages to squeeze himself in, smiling inwardly when he feels Himchan shifting the slightest bit to accommodate him.

“Hyung, I-”

“I said I get it.” Himchan snaps, unable to keep the anger out of his voice but he seems to regret it after when he sighs, burying his face into the cushions once more.

“There won’t be any party, okay…” Comes his muffled voice, and then in a softer tone, “even though it’s practically tradition.”

Youngjae bites back a laugh; even though he couldn’t see it, he’s positive Himchan is pouting this very moment. And as ridiculous as it is for a 24 year old to pout over being forbidden to throw a birthday party, Youngjae has to admit that it is also very endearing… and kind of cute.

Maybe Himchan notices Youngjae’s amusement because he perks up, eyes narrowed and as Youngjae predicted, pouting. “I guess it’s possible to not want a birthday party… even though I’ll never understand it,” he sniffs and makes to get up but Youngjae stops him with two hands on his shoulders.

“What? What?” Himchan demands, still glaring unhappily at the younger.

Youngjae sighs impatiently, staring right back into Himchan’s eyes. He sees the sadness and hurt beneath the anger and then under all that, the usual tiredness from endless days and not enough nights.

He squeezes Himchan’s shoulders, feeling the bones under his skin and the thin layer of flesh. Himchan’s been dieting, again.

“Hyung, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have shouted at you like that, it was rude. It’s just… I don’t want a party with 50+ people I don’t really know and that I have to up to and be polite to all night. And I don’t want you to go through all the trouble of organizing something you don’t much like anyway.”

Himchan turns away, pout growing more defined. Fine, he didn’t really like those company parties, but it’s an important part of his job and throwing a party had become his forte. It’s really all he can do for the boys, aside from cooking and Youngjae didn’t even want that!

He throws off Youngjae’s hands and stomps away; no point trying to avoid looking like a child now.

“If I told you what I really want for my birthday, would you listen?”

Himchan stops short at that, perking up a little bit. He hears Youngjae shuffle across the wood board floor but doesn’t bother turning around until the younger is grabbing his shoulders again. Youngjae leads Himchan back to the couch, sitting the older down with a gentle push.

“Hyung… don’t freak out.” He warns and Himchan raises an eyebrow at him, startled when he sees Youngjae’s slight smile. Youngjae sits down next to him, bringing his legs up to sit cross legged. He leans his head on Himchan’s shoulder, rubbing his face against the soft, fluffy sweater Himchan liked to wear.

Himchan gulps, unsure whether to bolt up and start shouting at Youngjae again or whether to revel in this brief respite from their fighting and Youngjae’s sudden show of affection.

“I want my birthday to comfortable, hyung… I want… I like this.” He lifts his head and Himchan turns to the side, stiff as a robot.

“W-what are you talking about? I-This is a prank, isn’t it? Yoo Youngjae, I swear-”

“It’s not a prank, hyung. I- I want us to rest. You’re already tired out by our schedule and day after day of practicing. I just want to spend time with you! Watch a movie, maybe take a nap together or a walk through the park. Or… just cuddling and I could read a book to you. Hyung, I- you’re really making me go all out on this, aren’t you?”

Himchan blinks, “well, I’m not making you do anything…” It’s hard to take in everything Youngjae’s just said. Mostly because it sounds so much like a confession to Himchan, which is everything he wants but for the impossibility of that.

Youngjae makes a noise of frustration from his throat and moves his hands to cup Himchan’s cheeks. “Will a kiss convince you?” Youngjae asks, but Himchan is unable to answer, finding himself in a rare moment where he is rendered speechless.

He watches, almost in slow motion as Youngjae leans up. Watches, in awe, at the plush lips he’s been dreaming so much of lately. Yet, when they press against him, Himchan’s eyes snap shut.

They’re a little dry and cracked from the cold but still, so, so soft. It doesn’t last nearly long enough in Himchan’s opinion but the pink on Youngjae’s cheeks when they pull apart makes up for it.

Youngjae is staring silently, and it takes a while for the cloud in Himchan’s head to clear and to realize that the younger is waiting for an answer. He clears his throat, the noise sounding too loud and awkward even in his ears. Himchan’s pretty sure his cheeks are on fire too.

“Well… yeah, we could… we could do that. I was going to suggest just that. You know, knowing how much you love movies and such… and cuddling…” Himchan trails off when Youngjae bursts out laughing.

He barely smothers his laughter when Himchan pout again and presses another kiss to Himchan’s cheeks. “I know, hyung,” he says through his smile, “we all know how smart you are.”

“You better,” Himchan mutters under his breath, blush deepening when Youngjae curls around his body again, resting his head on his shoulder. Himchan looks down to catch the blissful smile on the younger’s face and has to bite his lips to stop them from smiling too much. Himchan wraps an arm around Youngjae’s shoulder to bring him closer, mind already thinking up ideas of things they could do together during his birthday. And tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that.