“Don’t leave. Just don’t. Please.” He begged as he held onto my hand like it was the only thing that kept him from falling.

I didn’t turn around. I didn’t want to see his face. I didn’t want to be reminded of the heartbreaking memories.

“I’m sorry.” I tried to fight back the tears that were threatening to escape my eyes. Breaking free from his grip, I started to walk away, ready to leave behind the first and only love I had.

“Chan Young! Please stay!” He caught up to me and hugged me from behind, his arms wrapped around me as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. I could feel the tears streaming down from his face and mine. We just stood there, hoping that time would come to a standstill.

“Let me go, Lay.” I said with a shaky voice but my actions seemed to contradict my words as I held onto his arms that were wrapped around me tight.

“No. Not again. I was a fool once, but not anymore.” He spun me around to face him and I saw his grief-stricken face and the sad longing in his eyes. Something inside me started to stir as he pulled me against himself and wrapped me, once again, in his warm, strong arms.

“Lay…” Painful memories started to flood my mind and my resolve finally broke as I buried my face in his chest and cried my heart out. Three long years, I watched him from the crowd. For three long years, I have loved him, but he broke my heart and left me believing that love can never have a happy ending.

“Chan Young, let’s stop this.”

My world stopped spinning as the words kept on replaying in my mind. ‘Let’s stop this.’ Tears fell down my eyes as I watched him turn his back on me and walk away into the arms of another.

“How could you, Lay?”

It was unbearable.

“How could you?”

Just when I finally had the courage to forget him – his smile, his warmth, his hugs, his kisses – he reappears again in my life, trying to take me back, trying to make my heart beat crazy again for him, and only him.

“I’m sorry, Chan Young.”

“I hate you.”

“I love you.”

“I hate you. I hate you.”

“I know and I’m sorry. I love you, Chan Young.” He whispered the last words again and again, his sweet voice making me weak and vulnerable. I gripped his shirt and buried my face more in his chest as he held me tighter. I could feel his heart beat in sync with mine. His warmth made me feel protected; his soft whispers made me feel light and peaceful.

“Chan Young.” He raised my chin up to make my eyes meet his. I felt his delicate fingers wipe away the remaining tears from my cheeks as he settled his forehead on top of mine. With eyes closed, I felt his hot breath hit my face, his ever-so-gentle hands holding my face in place as he kissed my forehead, then my nose. I opened my eyes to see him leaning in towards me until his soft lips finally found its way to mine. Butterflies started to dance in my stomach as I kissed him back.

“Kiss me.” He was standing so close to me that with just one move, our lips could touch.

“But, we’re outside!” I tried to reason out.

“So? I want you to kiss me.”

“Lay…shut up.” I felt so embarrassed that I could just die there and then. I have never had my first kiss and I wasn’t, in any way, confident with my skills in that area. I watched as Lay frowned at me.

“I’m sorry.” I meekly uttered with my head bowed low.

“Why won’t you kiss me?”

“I just don’t want to.” I lied. Truth is, I’d really like to have his kiss, but I’m just a coward. I turned around as I heard the bell for next period.

“Let’s g-”

Everything was in slow motion as I felt a pair of soft lips touch my innocent ones. The world seemed to stop and watch us. I wasn’t breathing. How could I? Lay wrapped his arms around my waist and brought me closer to him just before he separated his lips from mine and smiled.

“That was fantastic.”

Every bit of ability to speak left me as I just stood there, dumbfounded and amazed. He kissed me so gently and yet it was filled with passion. I couldn’t explain the sheer happiness I felt as I touched my lips.

“Time for class. Let’s go?” He held out his hand which I gladly took.

“Yes!”

It seemed like forever before we broke the kiss, both of us panting. Lay looked at me with contentment in his eyes, yet a hint of sadness still lingered in them. He brushed back a strand of my hair and I tilted my head to meet his touch. How I missed his touch, his kisses, his love.

“Chan Young, let’s stop this.”

I seemed to have awakened from a dream as I pushed him away from me. Confusion and hurt registered in his eyes as he looked at me.

“Lay, stop this game.”

Rain started to fall as dark clouds started to envelope the sky. People started running for shelter, but we both just stood there, drenched and unmoving. I took in a deep breath as I started to walk away, not daring to look back and see if he was still standing there.

The loud patter of the rain hid my tears as I watched him walking under the same umbrella with another girl. He gently placed his jacket over her head like what he used to do to me. I felt so broken and unloved at that moment. What did I ever do wrong? Was my love not enough for him? I watched them from behind the post, drenched in my tears and the rain, as their figures started to disappear from my view.

I felt a hand grab mine and forcefully turn me around before a pair of lips smashed into mine. I struggled as I punched him on the chest and tried to push him away, but it was useless. I wasn’t strong enough, both physically and emotionally. I let him remind me of his sweet kisses as he s his arms around my waist and pulled me closer. Electricity shot through my entire system as the kiss became fiercer. His hot kisses made me numb as his tongue played with mine. The sheer amount of pleasure left me wanting for more and I could tell that he was experiencing the same thing.

<><><><><><><><><><>

I awoke to the sound of chirping birds and the early sun rays flooding the room. Pulling the blanket closer to my bare body, I watched Lay as he slept with contentment beside me. I softly his messy locks and his flawless face that has left me staring for a long time, even before I fell in love with him. He stirred in his sleep and I found myself smiling as he wrapped an arm around my waist.

A sudden thought came to me and I frowned. How I wish the time we spent last night, the love we declared to each other, could continue in the days to come, but no. I had to leave. It was for the best. I needed time to think. I slowly removed Lay’s hold on me as I got up from the bed and walked to where my clothes are. A certain album caught my attention and I picked it up. I felt my heart beat fast and my eyes start to well up as I opened it and browsed through the pictures of me and him. Memories are really hard to forget. I glanced back at Lay’s sleeping figure before picking up my stuff.

“Goodbye, Lay.” I kissed him lightly on the cheek before I left a note on his lamp side table and walking out the door.

<><><><><><><><><><>

“The plane is ready to land. Please make sure to take the necessary precautions, thank you.” The flight attendant announced through the speakers. I stopped reading my novel and looked out of the plane’s window.

It’s been 2 years since I left my country to study abroad. Two years since I said goodbye to the painful memories. Two years since I left him. Lay. I can’t help but wonder how he’s doing. Has he forgotten me yet? I snapped out of my reverie as the plane finally landed and the passengers started to get off.

“Chan Young!”

I turned around to see Soo Hee, my long time friend, waving at me. I waved back and started to head towards her when I accidentally bumped into someone.

“I’m sorry. My bad!” I apologized.

“It’s no problem.” I froze in my spot as I heard the stranger’s voice. It sounded so familiar. It sounded like him. Like Lay. I hastily turned around to see the man’s retreating figure. Could I have just imagined it all? I shook my head and continued to walk towards Soo Hee.

I’m finally back home, back in Korea. The feeling of relief and ease made me so happy that I unconsciously smile from time to time during the ride back to my ancestral home.

“I love you, Chan Young.”

I felt a tug on my heart as I remembered those words, those words that were whispered into my ear as I held onto him, panting in pleasure and pain. I felt my face turn as red as the scarlet sky during sunset as I remembered the last night I spent with Lay.

“We’re here, Chan Young! Welcome back home!” Soo Hee exclaimed as she stopped the car in front of my house. I gave her my sincere smile and gratitude before getting off the vehicle and be greeted by a chorus of welcomes and greetings from my family and neighbors. It’s so good to be back.

“Welcome back, Chan Young.”

That voice made me freeze and turn around slowly. I gazed at the man in those all-too-familiar clothes standing behind me with a bouquet of roses. He was wearing a cap and had his head bowed low so I could not register who he was, except for the fact that he was the man who bumped into me in the airport.

“Thank you.” I accepted the roses and was about to ask him if he was who I thought he was when I was suddenly pulled away by Soo Hee. I turned around to look at him again but he was already gone.

The little party ended late as my parents started to clean up the place and I was in my room, getting ready for a good night’s sleep. I lied on my bed and felt the satin covers caress my skin. It reminded me so much of his touch. Sadness came over me as I wondered what he was doing right now. It was not moments later until sleep finally took over me.

<><><><><><><><><><>

I could feel someone watching me. I stirred in my sleep and half-opened my drowsy eyes, only to meet a pair of familiar ones that were intently staring right back at me.

“Lay!”

He covered my mouth and did a ‘hush’ sign before he slowly let go. I felt my heart beat furiously at the sight of him. Here he was, just inches away from me, and he still hasn’t changed. He was wearing the cap and clothes I saw on the stranger earlier.

“You’re the one I bumped into this morning! Why didn’t you tell me?!”

He didn’t answer me, instead, I watched as he climbed onto the bed and sat in front of me. I moved back but it wasn’t enough to evade his arms from catching me and pulling me onto his lap.

“What are you doing?!” I exclaimed as I tried to pry off of him. Instead of answering, he silenced me with a kiss that triggered my long-kept emotions to awaken. Without hesitation, I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back with all the passion I could muster. I missed him so much. I missed his kisses. I missed all of him. I felt his hands circle around my waist and pull me closer. My fingers got tangled up in his locks as I wrapped my legs around his waist.

We broke the kiss moment later, panting at the same time. I placed my forehead on top of his and caressed his cheek.

“I missed you.”

“Then why did you leave?” He asked. Hurt was evident in his words. I unlocked my hold on him and stared at him with a sad smile.

“I had to make sure.”

“Of what?”

“Of my feelings for you.” I smiled.

“And?”

“I love you, Zhang Yi Xing.”

He just stared at me. I started to feel awkward under his gaze that I looked away. I could feel my heart beat louder that I’m certain he could hear it. Lay pulled me into a tight embrace.

“Lay?”

“Shut up. Just stay like this for a while.”

“But-”

“I missed you so much, Chan Young. You don’t know how long I looked for you.”

Looked for me? I felt my face grow hot. He looked for me. Lay released me from his hug and kissed me once again. I kissed back and we just found ourselves tangled in each other’s embrace and lost in the sheer pleasure and excitement.

<><><><><><><><><><>

I woke up to find myself sleeping . I watched as Lay slept and snored lightly. I planted a kiss on his forehead before looking for my clothes. I was about to get up when I felt Lay’s arm wrap around my waist.

“Don’t go. Don’t leave me again, please?”

I looked at him and his eyes held the recognition of sadness and fear in them, the fear of being left again. He was now sitting up and looking at me while holding my hand.

“I’m not going anywhere, Yi Xing.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. I won’t go away anymore. I’ll stay with you.”

And with that, our happily ever after started.