Here it is omg how exciting, I did it, I wrote the first chapter. To most this should be pretty familiar but its obvious I made a lot of changed. I just hope that you like the changes as much as I do haha, enjoy~~

*slightly boring, mainly backstory & introductions but thats just how 1st chapters are right?*

December 5th, 2013

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Nothing.

She felt nothing.

That’s what confused her. She let her mind rest for a moment before turning the gears in her head one last time so she could analyze and extract what emotion that was coursing through her veins. Note how she sounds like a machine, for that’s pretty much what she “felt” like at the moment.

Because there was nothing.

She thought she was going insane, but who knows maybe she is. She knew she had to feel something… anything. This was concerning her to the greatest. Where are the tears? Where are the loud tantrums? Where is the sudden urge to destroy everything that had to do with him? Where was the need to burn every cute little picture of them that were pinned on the cute little cork canvas that hung over their headboard? Most importantly why couldn’t she feel her heart breaking? Soon she realizes that maybe it’s because it isn’t. This confused her even more.

They were together since their third year of high school, making this their 5th year together? Or what would be their fifth year together at least. You guess you can say that in the back of her mind she knew it was coming, she really just didn’t expect him to lie. It was a risk on it’s own, telling him that she’s sick, but he had to know sooner or later right? I mean he was her boyfriend after all him of all people, excluding her best friend of course, should know right? She did nothing wrong but she couldn’t blame him either. What does it feel like to find out that the person you loved, or thought you loved, only had a certain amount of time before she was… you know… gone.

He told her it was because simply just didn’t feel the same anymore, although deep down she knew that it was her condition that bothered him. The breakup wasn’t too tragic to say the least, he let her down as nicely as he could. This doesn’t mean she was completely unphased by it, she was hurt, or at least thought she was. Maybe offended would be a better word for it, for she was dying after all the least he could do is pretend to love her the way she loved him. Though she knew she wouldn’t want that. Could it be that he felt like he needed to bail out of the relationship before he would feel obligated to pay for the medical bills? No, he wouldn’t do that, or at least she hoped he wouldn’t… not for just that reason.

That’s when the motors in her head start spinning again.

A rush of helplessness ran through her frail little body as she realizes how lonely she is. She went from feeling nothing, to realizing that she simply had nothing. This was barely an exaggeration due to her tragic backstory. You see, the poor girl’s parents past away in a car accident when she was only 13. They were killed almost instantly, and in a metaphorical sense, so was she. Fortunately, her high school years were miraculously close to perfect. Not to sound way too cliche and labelistic but there was no denying she was at the height of the popularity chain along with her 8, you heard right, 8 other girl friends throughout all 3 years of her high school career. And to top things all off she was a grade A student, no she was not the brightest in terms of intellectuality, but she was heavily determined which was enough to get her by. The best part though, was meeting her to-be “BFF” so to speak, Kim Taeyeon, and her to-be boyfriend-of-5-years to-be ex-boyfriend-of-2-hours, Choi Siwon. Unfortunately that didn’t last for Taeyeon moved to Japan to be with her boyfriend and obviously I think it’s about time we stop talking about Siwon now isn’t it. So thus, leaving her alone.  Oh how she wishes she could go back to her high school years, she thought to herself, it was such a simpler time. And the sickness, she’s lost so much she only saw it as merely but another unfortunate letdown of life.

Now what? she thought to herself humorously, but that couldn’t stop the single tear that let itself slowly slide down her sickly pale skin onto her tainted purple lips. Then it hits her.

She’s cold.

A little too cold for her liking to say the least.

Brutal even.

She takes a moment to remind herself of her surroundings. The sick girl sits motionless on a lonely park bench with faint empty smile frozen on her face. She has been sitting in the cold frosty air for quite a while now, admiring the twinkling diamonds of snow as they descend from the thick clouds that blinded moon and the stars. She couldn’t help but to compare herself to each beautiful crystal, and how each and every one of them will someday melt away and cease to exist. Her little analogy doesn’t phase her for she has nothing else to live for.

Thats when he came.

A young man who seemed to be just about her age nonchalantly strolls along the narrow path despite the cold weather. He comes to an immediate halt on his left heel as his eyes settle on a petite brunette shrouded in an oversized black hoodie underneath a bright pink snow vest with fur lining. He would honestly be scared to death if it wasn’t for her matching bright pink ugg boots that he thinks should be illegal but does her justice in a weird, adorable way. That didn’t change that fact that her skin was as pale and white as the snow beneath her spooked him to the slightest.

He stopped and stared at her for a short while in curiosity. Hundreds of questions running through his head. Why is she here? What is she doing here? Does she know what time it is? Is she okay? Should I go talk to her? See if she is okay? etc. etc.

Out of impulse he cautiously walks toward her only to stop just a few feet away for her. She notices him from her peripheral vision but chooses to ignore him and continue to stare mindlessly into the distance.

Thinking it’s the least he could do for the poor girl he takes the warm can of coffee he has been holding for warmth from his jacket pocket.

“Take it.” he insists holding the can in front of her.

She weakly lifts her head up to get a good look at him from his shoes to his face. He was tall, crazy tall, and had a manly figure but despite his tough appearance he had a warm smile and kind eyes. She looks into his brown eyes for the first time and she could have sworn her heart skipped a beat, she couldn’t really explain it for it’s been a while since the last time that happened. She doesn’t know why but she felt the need to take a moment to marvel at his features. His broad jawline, his clear skin, his intense eyebrows, the way his cheeks hollowed under his cheekbones, his dark hair, he was nearly flawless if it wasn’t for his large and slightly distracting ears of his but she chooses to focus on the positives. She’s practically stuck in a trance until he talks her back into reality.

“Well… Take it.” he repeats with his naturally deep, masculine voice that still has an alluring sweetness to it she noted, “You’ll feel better.”

Her faint smile grew bigger by his kindness. Her eyes moved from his face to the small can. She slowly lifts her hand grabs the can and tries to thank him but is too weak for words. He gave another assuring smile and continued down the path will a small sense of pride in himself for being such a kind citizen. That feeling quickly falters as he kept walking, he couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong. That he can’t just leave her there, in the blistering cold, something bad could happen to her if not already. And not making things any easier she doesn’t look like she’s getting up anytime soon. He lets out one last sigh of defeat before turning on his heel until he is facing in her general direction and walks back to the bench where she is seated taking the empty seat next to hers for himself.

Bewildered by his unexpected return she manages to pivot her head to his direction to find him staring softly right at her. keeping her face still preventing any kind of emotion from seeping through, she stares back at him blacking, waiting for him to explain himself. He then furrows his eyebrows together in concentration and she watches his eyes quickly scan her entire face as if he’s studying her until he visibly softens his gaze once more. He sends her one more slight grin before looking forward into the distance.

“You know, if you want, you can hang out at my place for a little bit. There’s a furnace so it’s nice and warm.” He boldly insists, he’s pretty bewildered by himself for he’s not one to just abruptly invite someone to his home, his sanctuary, let alone someone he just met on a park bench at a suspicious time at night. His eyes widen in panic before quickly turning back to her realizing how -y his invitation sounded and hoped to god she didn’t misunderstand.

“I- I don’t m- mean it l- like th-that!” he stuttered in desperation, “I m- meant it like two obviously very cold individuals who would rather prefer sitting in a warm little apartment drinking tea or coffee or hot chocolate or something like that you know like as a friendly gesture not like- you know!- the illegal thing…” he slowly let his sentence fade out in embarrassment from his little drabble “the bad thing…” he said in an innocent whisper, shyly rubbing the back of his neck waiting for her to respond. By this time his satellite disks for ears turned bright red signaling his nervousness.

There was something highly amusing about seeing such a childish nature in such a manly man. The girl felt the corners of twitch upward and pursed her lips together in attempt to suppress the giggles that’s been building within her since he started babbling. She could only hold them in for so long causing her to let out a mass amount of muffled giggles into the back of her hand.

He visibly relaxed at the sight of her laughter. He couldn’t really believe it, it’s the first sign of human emotion he’s seen from this mysterious female. That didn’t stop a genuine smile creeping its way upon his lips as he takes mental notes on how her eyes form into the shape of crescent moons when she laughs as if they are smiling with her. He waits for her to calm herself down a little before continuing.

“Oh so you think my embarrassment is funny?” he asks humorously with a quirk of his brow. She shrugs shyly and he huffs out a short laugh in return. “So... are we just going to stay here and freeze our butts off or should we go now?”

She finally removes her hand from her face and nods giving him a genuine smile in assurance.

Now it’s his turn to feel his heart to skip a beat. He shakes off this weird feeling and rises from the bench reaching a generous hand out to help her up. She grabs his hand gratefully but as soon as she is being pulled up she nearly falls over on her weak legs. Until she is saved by a pair of strong arms suddenly wrapped around her waist. She didn’t even notice the way her arms impulsively wrapped themselves around his neck. Her breath hitched when she found that their faces were merely centimeters apart. A rosy red color flushed her pale cheeks. Apparently he noticed the odd tension as well for he swallowed hard and cleared his throat before starting.

“Do you want me to carry you?” he asks sheepishly.

Feeling slightly embarrassed herself, she shakes her head. He shrugs and lifts her back up to a standing position & supports her until she regains balance. With that the two stranger continue down the narrow path together, and somehow, deep down, they both know that they are walking into something a little out of their comfort zone, but they are okay with it.