wrong one
damning girlfriend
He can't believe his eyes. He reads over and over of what he had clicked. Myungsoo buries his head over his hands. He is bound to know this day will finally arrive. Yet how does he explains his sweaty palms, his fidgety movements?
"Myungsoo?"
He looks up to the familiar fatherly tone.
"You're okay?" CEO Jungyeop places his hand over the latter's trembling shoulders in an attempt to calm him.
Myungsoo sighs. How is he supposed to? He hates the man for not preparing him for this moment. The moment when his relationship (lies) will be publicize. The moment he dreaded for who knows how long. The older knew it even before. How can CEO Jungyeop not tell him that day is today? Myungsoo wants to grab him in the collar, push him against the wall and give him one good punch. Just one good punch. He wants the elder to feel what he feels now. Pain. Scared. Anxious.
But no. His boss was just doing his job. He too is receiving judging eyes from the Koreans for his lack of ability to handle things smoothly.
In fact, of all the people who knew about him and her dating, no one is to blame for what had happened. He still remembers how s' face expression tensed when he first told them about his relationship with Doyeon. CEO Jungyeop's advice are still clear as if he had heard it yesterday.
"Date at your own risk."
A vivid memory plays in his head when Hoya personally expressed his thoughts about the younger's relationship.
Hoya never speaks to him alone. They were never that close. Nevertheless, Hoya still gave Myungsoo his piece of mind.
How he felt it was very unprofessional of Myungsoo to date in the middle of their packed schedule. How he thought it was very selfish of Myungsoo to not think how this will affect the group's image. How he thought Myungsoo is an ignorant to not think about the relationship for long term. "Don't you think she will be victimized? You think she will be safe once our fans found out? How will you save her then, Myungsoo? How?" Questions after questions came out of Hoya's mouth. Questions no one else dare to confront Myungsoo. His cheeks turned flame red. He hated that about Hoya. That he always say the truth; even the ugly ones.
Hoya ended their heated conversation with a 'it's all on you. I'm advising you to think over and think thoroughly. Choose wise.' and a pat on Myungsoo's back. "I love you and I care for you. That's why I'm telling you this." Hoya left short after without looking back.
(They never talked again.)
Thinking back, Myungsoo regrets for not considering to even think about Hoya's advice. He was too blinded by Doyeon's perfection.
(She still is.)
When that morning, that particular morning he went to a company that manages his production of his photobook. He wasn't grumpy but he can't say he was excited either to wake up that early when the other members can enjoy their rare leisure time. He kept reminding himself that this is for the sake of his photobook. The sake of your photobook, Myungsoo. The sake of your photobook.
And when he stepped in that building, a girl greeted him with wide smile showing her glittering white teeth. Myungsoo met a lot of girls; fans, acquaintances, colleagues. Nothing about this girl stood out. White dress with pink laces. Black silky hair past her shoulders. She was plain Jane. She was just another girl.
"L?"
He nodded. "Yeah." She bowed slightly. "My father is expecting you." Came a sweet smile afterwards.
"Your father is Mr Kim?"
"Yep. Oops, forgot to introduce myself. I'm Kim Doyeon." She clumsily added. "Nice to meet you, L."
(He had soft spot for clumsy cute girls.)
"Nice to meet you too, Doyeon."
The whole time Mr Kim explaining about the book's publication, he did not pay any heed. Not when Doyeon joining the meeting as well.
She sat next to Myungsoo and would throw in some suggestions like what paper material should he use for his book, designs for the book as a whole, which bookstores they can expect more sales from. Her hair would occasionally brushes his face.
(Her black silky wavy hair.)
She would laugh at things people won't consider funny. Doyeon would give it a hearty laugh and hits Myungsoo's upper arm jokingly when Myungsoo cracks a joke. She would come up with cheesy gag about weird deals her father ever received and their way on handling it and giggles giddily. Doyeon would give this glances to him and casually tucks her hair behind her ears. Her thighs would accidentally touches his and a bashful apologize would come after. Faint pink crept up to his cheeks. He loves skinships and he couldn't help himself but blush like a pubescent teenage boy. Female staffs always about that. That whenever he was in contact with the opposite , his body would stiffened up and his face would be nothing but pink. In the end, Myungsoo got the message.
Doyeon's flirting with him.
Myungsoo stared at her. He paid close attention to her.
He didn't mean too.
He has always been wanted. He gets that. It's tough being a stunning guy without having girls throwing themselves at him every once in a while. And Myungsoo finds them repulsive.
And that's exactly what Doyeon's doing.
What's the difference between the girls that came running after him and Doyeon? Why is he attracted to this girl; that equals other women chasing him?
Myungsoo later found himself thinking to ditch the meeting and just hang out with this girl. He just wants to.. get out of there.
After what seems forever, the meeting came to an end. Alas.
He didn't know what the photobook will look like later. He mentally kicks himself for not paying attention. Maybe he should arrange another meeting with Mr. Kim.
(This time, without Doyeon.)
He got up from his seat to excuse himself to rush to another schedule. Mr. Kim shook his hand before saying, "Nice to work with you." Doyeon also got up before muttering "I'll walk you out."
(That was unnecessary.)
When they reach the exit door, Doyeon pulled Myungsoo to face her. "I see you've been checking me out."
Had he been drinking water that moment, he might have choke and spit over her thick make-up. With a single brow raised, he counter attacked. "Look who's speaking."
"I saw the stares okay? You were being too nice to my father and you laughed a little too much at my corny jokes when you shouldn't have."
Smirk was seen hanging on the edge of his smile. "I was being polite to your father because he is my publisher. And you should be grateful I laughed for you if not, crickets would be having a singing contest."
Not giving up, she puts up a fight. "How do you explain the stares?"
"Same way you explain the thigh brushes."
"That was an accident okay?!" Doyeon yelled slightly upon hearing Myungsoo's words. "How could you bring that up? I said sorry, already." Her eyes immediately fell to the ground.
Myungsoo laughed at the girl's embarrassing expression. "Well, so is the stares. So knock it off." She looked up apologetically with a pout. "I was just testing your reaction. Didn't expect you to take it seriously."
(He had soft spots for pouty girls.)
"Oh wait here. I wanna give you something."
"I would wait but my schedules wouldn't."
"Just for a sec. I'm just gonna.." And off she went. Seconds later, screeching heels followed after, she handed Myungsoo a card.
"The company's contact numbers. You would need my father's number."
Again, Myungsoo chuckled. Is she a moron or acting like one? "I wouldn't come into contact with your father if I hadn't had his number."
"Hey hey hey look on the bright side. You got my number as a bonus!" She tip toed to match Myungsoo's height and pointed at a number under Mr. Kim's contact number.
"And I need it, why?"
Doyeon played dumb as she scratches her neck, "You know, just in case you couldn't get in touch with my father. He's a very busy man. Another customer like you wouldn't ring any bell in his rowdy head."
Another customer?
"You're a fan of mine aren't you?" Myungsoo shoot yet with another question that caught her off guard.
"What?"
"C'mon, don't tell me you're the common ulzzang who doesn't give a rats about idol. We both know that is a play."
"Common? Excuse you, I'm not common. I'm special." Doyeon blew on her manicured nails.
"Face like yours can be find everywhere from the streets of Hongdae to the corners of Gangnam." Myungsoo truly pushed her off the edge.
That's the thing about him; he doesn't want to get hurt in relationships. That's why he tests every girl with deadly questions. To find out if they can keep up the pace of his games. To see if they can cope with his honesty. It's his way to shield himself from any pain in further relationship. And his way to find his true soulmate.
(Who could blame him for still being stupid, though?)
"If you're suggesting plastic surgery, you're wrong. I'm as natural as you are. Girls looking like me because they used my picture as an example to their cosmetic surgeons."
"You look like you planted that hair. Why? You were bald before?"
"This glorious hair is a result by weekly visits to saloons and picking the right hairdresser." This girl's good. She rebutted every argument he had. She answered everything calmly like she had been trained.
He had soft spot for girls like her.
Like Doyeon.
Myungsoo pulls his hair. Drowned by the memories of yesterday, he forgot today's chaos. Woollim had released another statement regarding his true relationship to Doyeon.
The fans now know the truth. The whole truth.
He remembers how he called Doyeon that one night, in rage. It was during the first statement was released by Wolllim.
"How could you do that? Posting up our matching items, right after my airport pictures was uploaded! What was that?!"
"A lot of people had the same thing."
"Identical Hermes limited edition bracelet? Is that a common thing for people to buy? That's our bracelet! Ours!"
"What's the fuss? We're going to go public after this anyway. You promised!"
"Yes I promised. But that's the thing. Why can't you let me handle things?"
"The fans found out already. They linked me to you. Rumors are spreading like wild fire on the Internet."
"That's because you started the spark! Urgh! Why can't you leave things to me?! Your career is not the one on the line!" Myungsoo screamed in frustration.
"My career? My career?! How about my FEELINGS? Have you ever thought about how I felt, how I loathed dating secretly an idol? How I want to date freely like any other couple? Have you ever think about that?! And all you think about is your stupid career!"
Myungsoo was beyond anger. It took over him that he was unable to speak.
"Get lost." Doyeon hung up soon after.
He tried to console things with Doyeon later that night. He called her, only to be greeted by voicemails. He texted her, only to be replied by silence.
He hated girls like her.
Yet he still clings. Yet he still tried his best to save this relationship.
The company lied for him the first time. To protect every side. His image, Infinite's image, Doyeon's image and fans' feelings.
Now, all that has gone down the drain. The company told the truth about their relationship and it had worsen things.
He is heartbroken, Doyeon's are hunted by hateful comments, s are bitter by the sudden unwanted spotlight, Woollim's public relation skills are criticized for the chaotic scandal and fans being less supportive than they should have.
He should've known this was coming. Every of Hoya's predictions came true. Doyeon's car was scratched and slashed, stones were thrown at her on daily life, trashes on her office desk is just another common thing.
Myungsoo tries calling her again after 3 months not contacting her. He had no knowledge things would escalate that far.
He just wishes she'd talk to him.
He wishes this all never happen. Myungsoo entertains the idea of his old life; shopping with Doyeon for an after party occasion in Woollim, picking juicy apples and arguing whether Fuji apples are better than Granny Smith's. Infinite being tight as ever, practicing day and night yet feeling the strong bond between them. His company's image still clean and praised for having talented singers under its wings. Fans united as ever without scandals questioning their loyalty.
He presses the red button.
It was her fault this all started.
He should've chosen better.
And he promises;
Next time he will.
author note: just so you know, some of the scenarios I wrote is true. Doyeon's father did managed Myungsoo's 2nd photobook. So I guess that's where they knew each other. The torture Doyeon went through the whole scandal was as she tweeted. And I bet most of you saw the picture of them shopping together for a Woollim party.
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