Chapter two
Nodus TollensNodus Tollens:
n. the realization that the plot of your life doesn’t make sense to you anymore—that although you thought you were following the arc of the story, you keep finding yourself immersed in passages you don’t understand, that don’t even seem to belong in the same genre—which requires you to go back and reread the chapters you had originally skimmed to get to the good parts, only to learn that all along you were supposed to choose your own adventure.
Cue Rainy mood (Keep at a Medium volume)
Chapter two – Maybe, Maybe not
“I read in a book once, that the reason it rains is because god is crying.” Tiffany fumbled over the empty take-out boxes on the floor, holding stacks of paper balls in her arms. Dropping a few here and there, before walking to the trash can and throwing them all away. “But if that were true,” she paused in her steps and words. Taeyeon was laying on a mat placed on the floor, a blanket covering her up to the brim of her chin and a white coconut scented patch resting on her forehead. She had been listening to Tiffany ramble on for about three hours now. And not once did she have any intent on stopping her. “—God must be really depressed.” Tiffany let out a faint smile, the fringe in her eyes sweeping away as she swooped down to pick up the food boxes off the floor.
“Do you ever clean this place?” Taeyeon groggily asked. Tiffany’s words were a sort of fever medicine. They made her drowsy and made her words slurry, but they made her feel better.
“Nope.” Spinning on her heel Tiffany tossed the trash away. “I don’t like cleaning, mostly because I like stuff to remind me of what I spent the last few hours, days, or weeks doing.” Walking over to Taeyeon she crouched down, “Or eating.” She whispered, placing the back of her hand against Taeyeon’s cheek. “It’s weird right?”
Taeyeon thought everything about her was weird but she kept shut anyways, admiring her way of thinking somehow.
“Because usually people keep pictures or diaries of the things they’ve done or something.” Tiffany turned her head to stare at the overflowing trashcan and the paper balls tossed around it. Filling it up graciously, “But I can never seem to write anything down on paper. Believe me,” She said, “I’ve tried.” The time slowly passed them by and the silence slowly pegged their senses. It really didn’t seem like any time had passed at all, with Taeyeon snuggled up in three blankets and Tiffany sitting beside her. Hearing her breathe. “Don’t you think you should call someone? Aren’t there people that are going to be worried if you aren’t home?” Tiffany whispered, crossing her legs and rocking a little from side to side.
“No.” Taeyeon shook her head, “I don’t think that really matters.”
“Good.” Tiffany let out a deep breath, falling on her back with a thud, sprawling her arms out on the floors, as if she were making an invisible snow angel, “Cause’ I don’t have a phone anyways.” Taeyeon didn’t say anything, she felt her eyelids start to weight her down. She was just so tired.
“They’re overly expensive anyways, you know?” Tiffany stuffed her hands under her head for a makeshift pillow. “Usually you get a phone to keep in contact with those you love right?” she paused, “Or at least care about. So I don’t understand the deal with a phone having to be over a hundred dollars.” Shaking her head she turned to face Taeyeon. But Taeyeon had fallen asleep already. Her shallow breathing through her parted lips had made Tiffany want to sleep also. She sighed, “It’s not like I have anyone I love, or care about to call anyways. So I guess it doesn’t matter.” Tiffany shut her eyes as she uttered softly, scooting closer to Taeyeon. Pulling a blanket over her own body, she was cocooned in a ball of warmth, they both were. And it was just lulling her to sleep.
“Goodnight Taeyeon.”
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Standing on an invisible sky-high tower. Taeyeon wondered, how high did she have to go in order to see the sun?
Taeyeon’s eyes fluttered open with the high-pitch noise of a teapot.
“We missed school.” Tiffany appeared out of nowhere, holding a mug with steam overflowing from it. She noticed the house was now entirely spotless, “We over slept.”
Sitting up the blood rushed to her head, the room slightly spinning. “That’s okay.” She croaked, looking around she winced “You cleaned.”
Tiffany shrugged, kneeling down now eye-level with Taeyeon, “I cleaned.” She repeated Taeyeon’s words, “It sort of feels like my memories were swept clean now.” Tiffany bit her lip. “I have no recognition of what I ate yesterday. Thank you Taeyeon.”
Taeyeon scoffed, feeling ten times better than before, “And how is that my fault? It’s about time you cleaned. What do you need memories like that for anyways, do you have short-term or something?”
Tiffany stayed silent, and Taeyeon felt she over stepped her boundaries, “Selective memory.” Tiffany replied and shrugged, handing Taeyeon her home-brewed tea, “Those are things I like to remember. What I ate. What I spent last Friday doing. What movie I saw two weeks ago, what I wrote down but couldn’t finish.” Tiffany stood back up and headed to the burner that had a pan smeared with oil on it.
“Why did you clean anyways?” Taeyeon asked, the bitterness of the tea getting to her again. But for some reason she couldn’t stop sipping it. Tiffany didn’t say anything after that. So Taeyeon pursed her lips, feeling bad and a tad bit guilty. “What are you going to do today?”
Tiffany cracked an egg on the side of the table before dropping the yoke into the pan, watching it sizzle about.
“Breakfast, shower, work and then—”
“Back home.” Taeyeon finished her sentence, feeling a bit proud as if she could read minds. But for anyone who sat beside Tiffany at school, it didn’t take a genius to know. Or someone with superpowers. “Then what am I going to do?” Taeyeon questioned, feeling a bit empty from the lack of food and feelings.
“Then what are you going to do?” Tiffany flipped the egg over, adding some pepper and salt. Taeyeon saw all the spices and cooking material Tiffany had on the kitchen counter. That was more like a flimsy table. She scoffed again. Tiffany seemed to acquire a habit of throwing back a question with a question.
“I guess I’ll accompany you.” Taeyeon said softly, “Since school is already out of the picture.” Tiffany shuddered. A gust of wind coming from the vent above her, brushing her skin. She moved her bangs from her face, inhaling softly.
“I hope you like egg.” She turned to Taeyeon, “Because I don’t have the motive to cook you anything else.”
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Cue Rainy mood (Keep at a low volume)
Taeyeon felt weird in someone else’s clothes. It was sort of like living another person’s life.
“So where do you work?” It had to be almost mid-afternoon, but Taeyeon concurred it was barely morning. By the slight drizzle in the rain. Tiffany skipped a beat in her steps, Taeyeon found herself holding the umbrella for the two of them once again, otherwise Tiffany probably would have walked in the rain again. The cars passed them by, the grey clouds were darker than usual, and the streets were barely alive, hanging by a thin string called life.
“Here…” Tiffany pointed to a long strip of road, with food stalls and shops lingering on both sides. Then suddenly the streets heart picked up it’s pace pumping blood into the people as it became more crowded and crowded. The colors here were more vibrant, the people here were taller, or shorter, fatter or skinnier. It was an odd place with odd living organisms. Taeyeon wondered if this is how the bottom of the ocean looked like. Different in every way she could think of. But they weren’t under water, they weren’t anywhere near the raging vast ocean. So she started to think Tiffany kidnapped her taking her hostage into another world, parallel to her own. Except it always rained here also.
“What do you mean you work here?” Taeyeon cocked her head up looking towards the sky. And something just seemed off. “Tiffany what time is it?”
“Five in the morning.”
Taeyeon sighed.
“You said we overslept!” Taeyeon kicked a pebble out of her way, secretly she wasn’t mad at all. This was better than her every day routine. Even if it was Tiffany’s everyday routine. Grabbing her free hand and pulling her forward, Tiffany looked back. Nothing apologetic etched on her face.
“I lied.”
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Taeyeon pinched her nose, shutting from gagging. “This is seriously what you do for a living?” her nasally voice pierced through the thin misty air.
“Not for a living Taeyeon.” Tiffany held the sharp knife in her hand, before making a swift motion down with all the force she could muster slicing into the head of a dead fish. “I do this because I like too.” Taeyeon shut her eyes tight seeing the blood and the fish head roll to the side.
“Oi, good job Fany! You’re getting better each day eh?” a short fat man rubbed the gruffness of his beard, laughing along with the customers that came for slowly stewed fish soup. It was an open outdoors food stall, with a plastic roof above their heads. Loud traditional music blasted through the speakers and the atmosphere was the most living breathing thing Taeyeon ever witnessed.
Tiffany her lips in return with a proud smile, her forearm wiping the icy sweat off her brow. “Let’s go Taeyeon grab yourself a rubber apron and a sharp knife and help why don’t you?”
Taeyeon wasn’t used to getting her hands dirty. She wasn’t used to it at all.
“O… Okay.” And before she knew it, she was chopping off fish heads to the beat of the blasting music.
“Like this?” Taeyeon asked, slamming her wrist down and watching the head roll off to the side. She held her stomach, feeling the egg from earlier ache to come out. Tiffany didn’t reply before she took a sort of dust pan sweeping all the fish heads into a big black plastic trashcan. “Where are those gonna go too?” Taeyeon pointed with the tip of her knife, eventually starting to get used to the fishy smell.
“I don’t know.” Tiffany said, “I just chop them off and throw them away. That’s my job.”
“And you like doing this?” Taeyeon was growing tired and frankly she had about enough.
“Yup. I like the smell, the blood, the music, the people, the food and the sweat that gathers on my brow.” Tiffany took a glance at Taeyeon. “I like working hard you know? If you’re not working then what’s the point.”
Taeyeon rolled her eyes leaning against the wall behind her, watching Tiffany keep at it. Never missing a beat. “I don’t know, maybe doing other stuff, like having fun or something.”
“Fun.” Tiffany huffed, “What does that even mean to you? Because from what I gather you like to stay hidden from the rain rather than dance in it.” Tiffany paused, taking off her rubber apron and wiping her hands.
“And that’s why Kim Taeyeon. You get the fevers and I get the sweat on my brow.”
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Thin paper trails of a life lived in rain don’t exist. Because the rain washes them away, each day. So what do you have to show that today you lived and breathed? What do you have as proof that today wasn’t just another ordinary day?
Well, Taeyeon had Tiffany and Tiffany had Taeyeon. That was enough to at least cause a slight dent in their lives. A small dent that today, wasn’t just another ordinary day.
“So this is it…” They stopped in front of a two story house. A rusted golden gate wrapped around its perimeter as the yard looked like it hadn’t been taken care of in years. The grass was more than knee high, and Tiffany noticed a large angel sculpture hidden beneath it. The house was made out of brick, although the material was chipping away due to the weathering rain.
The rain wore everything down.
“Okay.” Tiffany nodded, stuffing her hands into her pink rain coat pockets.
“Will I see you again?” Taeyeon questioned, hearing the pelting rain hit the leathery material of the umbrella. She wondered, if she too was being worn down by the constant rain.
“We sit by each other in class.” Tiffany smiled biting her lip unconsciously, “So I would say yes. You’ll see me again Kim Taeyeon.” She paused, “Maybe.” Tiffany suddenly pulled her hoody over her head, spinning on the balls of her feet before making her way out of the lush green yard that sprung with life.
And soon she had bolted for the streets running with a wild laugh until she disappeared around the corner, melting in with the rain.
Taeyeon shook her head. “Maybe…” she whispered. “What does that even mean?”
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