I have no idea on how did this happen. All of a sudden, I am standing here, in front of the building I always wished to be in. That started ever since I knew him… Who’s him anyway?

Flashback:

       “Hey, Soyeon! Look at this boy group! They just debuted a few months ago.” Jiyoon, my best friend, exclaimed.

       I stared at the 12 dazzling boys on Jiyoon’s computer. They almost looked the same except for a certain guy…

Present:

      “It’s him...” I sighed.

       As I was still wondering how I ended up here, a very elegant van stopped in front of me. As the door opens, one by one, the boys I know so well (though not in personal), went out. I was shocked. Why? It is because, I can see him… The guy that I have loved since I knew him. After the long wait, I am finally seeing him, in front of me. But… something is wrong. As he passed by me, he smiled. I know I should be happy but why am I wondering? His smile is not the usual fan service smile. His smile shows as if I am someone important to him.

       “Hey! Why are you spacing out?! Hyung already passed by you!” The youngest, Sehun told me.

       I snapped out of my thoughts and shrugged. Sehun shook his head and dragged me with him inside the building. As we are walking towards their practice room, Sehun kept on blabbering about the appearance they did on their last schedule. My mind was lost while listening to him. Thinking why things are getting weird as time goes by. My thoughts are interrupted as I realized that we already arrived in their practice room. Sehun opened the door and let me in first.

       “Oh! Soyeon is here!” Suho said happily.

       What’s weird is that, they are happy to see me. It’s not that I’m not happy that I am interacting with them now but, the thing that they really know me bothers me. It’s very… unusual. As I was spacing out again, someone tapped my shoulder. My eyes widened when I saw who tapped my shoulder. I’m not frightened. I just feel weird about everything. I stared at the person who called my attention… it was Lay.

       “You’ve been spacing out a lot. Any problems?” Lay asked.

       Why was Lay concerned about me? Am I someone special to these boys? But who am I to them? What am I to them? I keep on asking these questions in my mind. I would want to ask him but I’m scared. I’m scared of what he will answer. So I unconsciously shook my head in response.

       Luhan approached me and led me to a comfortable chair near the windows. I sat there, watching them rest. It’s as if for them, it is very usual for me to be there. But why am I uncomfortable? My thoughts are clouding up my mind again but soon enough, got interrupted when someone sat beside me. It was him…

       “Hey, why are you spacing out? Didn’t you miss me?” He asked.

       Although his question was very weird. Well simply because, I thought all this time, he didn’t know me. I think it will be best to just enjoy the moment and forget the weird things running inside my mind at the moment. I smiled at him.

       “I… I’m sorry, oppa. Are you tired?” I asked him.

       He shook his head and his next action took me by surprise. He hugged me. My bias hugged me!

       “I’m not tired anymore since you’re here. You’re my strength” He said sweetly.

       I blushed at his statement. My thoughts are washed away by those simple words. I can’t believe it. He said I’m his strength. I bet I am smiling like an idiot in front of him by now. But who cares, he freakin’ said it to me. Does that mean he loves me back? I was so happy. Happy that finally, all my struggles are worth it. The guy, whom I love for a long time that doesn’t even know I exist, feels the same way too. And now, he knows that I exist. I was about to hug him back when I heard a very loud scream. I covered my ears and closed my eyes. Slowly, the noise stopped. That’s when I start opening my eyes once again.

       And that’s when I realize… I was only dreaming. I sighed as I sat on my bed.

       “Aish! I dreamt about him again.” I smacked my head and started laughing. Then suddenly, I stopped. I felt tears running down my cheeks. I was crying. I am already on the verge of believing it. It was just a dream. But I was hurt. I want it to be real. I’ve loved him for a long time now. But who am I? I’m just his fangirl.

I stood up and sat on my table. I opened my diary and flipped the pages until I arrive to a blank page.

                                                                                                                                                                         November 9, 2013

                                                                       I dreamt of you again, Byun Baekhyun…