I slid out of my comforter and check the time. 5:30 AM. I woke up from my sleep from a horrible headache. My head was pounding from all directions. I slept the entire day yesterday but my fever showed no signs of leaving. Walking in the bathroom, I caught my own reflection in mirror. I looked very withered, and, sad. Maybe I really am sad. As I lay back down on my bed that is definitely too small for me, I checked my phone. No one was looking for me. My parents did not look for me, or my brother, or my best friends. I swear at that moment, I felt so… alone. People just wanted to be my friends because I could not say no. I would help them with their homework, or even work on their homework for them. I would pay for their meals just because my parents are quite wealthy off. But when I caught a fever, there was no one there to be with me. No one cared because they never genuinely cared for me. It was all just a façade. I knew it all along, but I just cannot help but buy into this lie I am living in. All these lies are telling me that I am loved and people do care for me. Tears started to roll down my face, I don’t know whether it was because I finally had to face this sad truth or because the physical pain was too hard to bear. I needed to talk to someone, but no one was home. My parents were away for a business trip. My brother moved out last year. Impulsively, I dialed a number on my phone and I placed it beside my right ear. There was no way this person could pick up my phone call, no one is awake this early, at least for someone who is in college. 

“Hello?” the voice sounded kind of raspy.

“Baekhyun…”

“Min Hee! What’s wrong? You were not in anthropology class yesterday…” Baekhyun sounded more alert.

“I caught a really bad fever…”

“Ahhh, you should’ve told me! Do you need anything?”

“It’s nothing… I just needed someone to talk to… sorry for waking you up. You know what, you can go back to sleep I'll hang up…” I sounded desperately very indecisive. 

“Hmm, are you going back to sleep anytime soon?”

“No, probably not. I could not…”

“Ok. I’m coming over.”

“What?”

“I’ll see you in 15 minutes”

Then Baekhyun hung up, leaving me very confused. He was not lying though, exactly 15 minutes later, I heard several light knocks on my door.

“Hi Min Hee, sorry for being a bit late, I stopped by the pharmacy first to get you some things.” He said as he walked in my house. Baekhyun started taking out all the things he bought. Cough drops, fever strips, a thermometer, and pretty much everything he could possibly find from the drugstore. I could not help but chuckled when he started introducing the products one by one.

“Hey, I had to make sure you know what all these are for!” He nudged my arm with his elbow.

“Thank you Baekhyun…”

“For being awesome? I know.” Baekhyun responded humorously.

“No, for coming over when I needed the most… support.” I started crying again. I definitely made it really clear to myself not to cry in front of a guy, but this just happened. Hate myself for being a weakling.

“Min Hee…” Baekhyun impulsively hugged me tight. I never felt so loved and wanted as I was in this moment.

“Min Hee, you are loved. Don’t make yourself think otherwise. You are beautiful in your own ways. You are different in your own ways… and… I love every single thing in you…”

I pulled away from the hug at the sudden confession.

“What did you say? I think my brain is not function too well under the drug’s influence… I thought you said you loved me… weird.” I remarked immediately.

“That’s what I said…” Baekhyun hugged me again to my surprise.

“I love you so much that I would come here this early Min Hee how could you now know that I’ve loved you since that time you helped me get to my class on the first day of school back in high school…”

“Oh my gosh Baekhyun that was like… three years ago! Why did not I know that?”

“I don’t know… Maybe you were too busy trying so much to get other people’s approval… Min Hee, you do not have to try to reach anyone’s standards cause that will always fail you…”

I nodded in approval. Everything he said was as if he was speaking truths to me. All there times I only cared about what other people thought of me, but I know now that even thought I tried so much, I will never be able to reach their expectations.

“So now that you know that you are loved, you don’t have to try so hard anymore. Just enjoy life…” Baekhyun cupped my face and placed his lips gently on mine. After what seemed like forever, I broke the kiss.

“Hey, I have a fever! Why are you doing this?” I smiled at him, the only person who cared so much for me.

“It’s okay, I do not mind being sick with you!” He kissed my head and ruffled my hair.

“By the way…” Baekhyun continued, “why did you call me? Out of all the people you could have called, you called me.”

“I don’t know… but regardless, if I didn’t call you, I would never know your feelings… and my own I guess. Such a perfect timing…”

He smirked. “Silly girl” and he hugged me even tighter.

Apparently, when I felt most alone, I found love. Maybe my own selfishness and inadequacies can bring good things to myself. How about you?