Tarian is still furious about Yongguk – as much as she hates to admit it – by the time school rolls around again on Monday. She sits slouched in her desk, hiding behind her textbook, as first period drones on. The seats around her are empty, but she suspects they won’t stay that way for long.

Sure enough, closer to the class’s end than beginning, the door opens and in troops her faithful tormentors, laughing raucously over something Jongup had just said. Mrs. Chae completely ignores them, as usual, and they traipse over to their seats around Tarian’s desk.

“Jeez, what’s the matter with you?” Daehyun said, sounding genuinely surprised by her epically foul mood.

Tarian huffs and faces away from them. “None of your damn business.”

Apparently Yongguk hasn’t mentioned what happened Friday night because Jongup, Youngjae, and Daehyun seem to have no idea why she’s so grumpy.

“Are you okay?” Jongup asks, actually sounding concerned.

If Tarian wasn’t quite so angry, she might be a little pleased that they actually seem to care, but as it is she’s just more annoyed. She puts her hand in the air.

Mrs. Chae looks a little alarmed. Tarian has never disrupted class without the assistance of Daehyun, Youngjae, and Jongup before. “Uh, yes? What is it, Miss Price?”

“May I go to the bathroom?” Tarian asks, then gets up and leaves the classroom without waiting for Mrs. Chae to answer. Nobody stops her.

Even though she doesn’t actually have to use the bathroom, she directs her feet towards the girls’ lavatory anyway. She chooses one that is on the opposite side of school from her classroom so that she can take as long as possible getting back. Her head is spinning and she’s in such a foul mood that she’s seriously considering skipping even though she knows Daeho and her social worker will have a field day with an unexcused absence like that.

She’s just turned the corner when she spots an unlikely pair of students up ahead. Alarmed, Tarian quickly ducks back around the corner. What on earth are Yongguk and Yonghwa doing together?? She strains to hear their conversation.

“I don’t understand,” Yongguk is saying, and he sounds a little defensive.

Yonghwa sighs. “I’m saying that Tarian isn’t happy dating me. Everyone knows it.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Yongguk demands gruffly.

Another sigh from Yonghwa. “Because I really care about her and I want her to be happy, even if it’s not with me. You should date her.”

There is a long pause, and Tarian fancies they can hear her pounding heart from around the corner. Finally Yongguk says, “You’re the one who pointed out that I’m not good for her. She’s only going to get hurt if I hang around her.”

“That’s a definite possibility,” Yonghwa agrees, sounding a bit a sad. “But it’s what she wants.”

Another pause, and when Yongguk speaks again, his voice is cracking. “I don’t want to hurt her…”

“Then you’ll have to be extra careful,” Yonghwa says simply.

Tarian doesn’t stay to listen to any more of their conversation. There are unwanted tears stinging her eyes, and she turns to run quickly to the nearest bathroom. She locks herself in one of the stalls and lets the tears flow.

She can’t believe what an she’s been this whole time. She feels like a tool, like a loser. So all along both Yongguk and Yonghwa have been trying to protect her, and she’s made Yonghwa feel like he’s not good enough. She must have been hurting him this whole time, and all she’s been concerned about was herself and Yongguk. She can’t believe what an she’s been.

She dries her eyes and washes her face the best she can before she heads back to class, but, even so, it’s pretty obvious she’s been crying. She slips quietly in her seat and hides again behind her book, refusing to look at anyone. But she nearly bursts into tears again when she feels Jongup’s hand on her shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze as if to say he’s there for her if she needs him.

“Are you okay?” Youngjae asks gently between classes. “We can bail out of here if you want.”

But Tarian shakes her head. “No, I’m fine. Just having a bit of a rough day. I’ll manage.”

And somehow she does manage. She’s afraid of running into either Yongguk or Yonghwa – or both – but she doesn’t see hide nor hair of either of them for the rest of the day. Eunji offers to walk her home but Tarian declines. She’s not feeling particularly social.

She spends the whole next day at school dreading having to talk to either Yonghwa or Yongguk, and she manages to avoid them fairly well until after the final bell. When she leaves her classroom, Yonghwa is waiting for her. He must have left his own class early in order to make it to hers before she disappeared.

He gives her a sad sort of smile. “Hey,” he said.

She tries to smile back but it is more of a grimace. “Hi,” she says, trying to pretend like everything is normal. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to go for ice cream?” he asks.

She tries to think of a million excuses but they all sound rather lame in her head so in the end she has no choice but to agree.

They’re silent as they leave the school grounds and walk towards the nearby ice cream parlor. It’s still warm, so the shop is crowded with other people. They wait quietly for their turn to order, then retreat to a tiny table in the corner to eat.

“Listen, Tarian, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking,” Yonghwa begins.

She wants to stop him but she doesn’t want to give away that she’d been eavesdropping yesterday, so she swallows the lump in and nods for him to continue. She’s not sure she can find her voice, at any rate.

Yonghwa takes a deep breath. “Look, I really like you, Tarian,” he says. “You’re a great person, and I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you. But…”

She doesn’t know why she’s so close to tears. She’d been wishing she was with Yongguk the majority of her relationship with Yonghwa.

“I just think our hearts are in different places,” he continues, reaching across the table to take her hand. “I think maybe we shouldn’t see each other anymore.” He watches her face closely to see how she’s handling it.

“I’m sorry,” she says, lip quivering. “I haven’t been a very good girlfriend, I know.”

But Yonghwa smiles and shakes his head. “I like you, Tarian. A lot. But you don’t like me as much as I like you.”

She opens to protest, but he plows on.

“It’s okay, you know,” he assures her. “You can’t control who you fall in love with. It’s not your fault. But I do care about you a lot. I really hope we can stay friends.”

Tarian puts on a brave face. “I’d like that a lot,” she says, forcing a weak smile. 

Did you guys think I disappeared??

Sorry for my long hiatus! I had to go back to America for my wedding, and then a bunch of stuff has happened so it's been a long time since I've been able to write!!

Also, this story is almost finished OTL