after top hyung talked to me,my mind seemed to be a little clear now

 

he's right

 

she will never come back even if i ruin my life

 

it's nonsense

 

what has happened,happened...

 

cannot be changed

 

all i can do now is move on

and continue my life

 

without her

 

 

 

without the person i love

 

 

it's possible,right??

 

 

 

 

 

my phone beeped

 

 

"hyung we have a gig tonight,don't be late,love you hyung!!"

 

 

it's seungri

 

 

ahh that boy he is so childish!!!

 

 

 

i joined their group

 

 

BIGBANG IS THE NAME!!

 

cool right??

 

we have a gig tonight

 

i saw my digicam on a table

 

 

our videos are still there

 

 

memories ....

 

 

only memories are left

 

 

 

 

*flashback*

 

 

i was sleeping on the couch

 

i saw dara standing in front of me

 

"hi ji!!"

 

her smile was weird

 

i have a bad feeling about this

 

"hello"

 

she gigggled

 

 

I KNEW IT!!

 

i looked at myself at the mirror

 

my face was filled with drawings,scribbles and everything

 

like what the pokemon jigglypuff always does

 

 

then she showed up holding a camera

 

"hi ji!!say hi to the camera!!"

 

"WITH THIS FACE!!"

 

she pouted...

 

 

"you mad at me,ji??"

 

then my heart surrendered and melted....

 

 

i wrapped my arms on her shoulders

 

"aniyo,of course not.i love you"

 

i kissed her cheek

 

she kissed my cheek too

 

"i love you too,ji!!"

 

*end of flashback*

 

 

i felt tear sliding down my cheeks

 

i guess tears are part of moving on

 

i wiped my tears and smiled

 

 

"bye dara,bye princess"

 

 

 

the night came

  i reached the restaurant we will perform at

 

"hyung!!"

 

seungri welcomed me with a high five

 

after a few minutes we were called on stage

 

we performed haruharu

 

(A/N listen to it guys it's daebak!!)

 

Leave
Yeah, Finally I realize that I am nothing without you
I was so wrong, forgive me
Ah ah ah ah

My broken heart like a wave
My shaken heart like a wind
My heart vanished like smoke
It can't be removed like a tattoo
I sigh deeply as if a ground is going to cave in
Only dusts are piled up in my mind
(Say goodbye)

Yeah, I thought I wouldn't be able to live even one day without you
But somehow I managed to live on (longer) than I thought
You don't answer anything as I cry out "I miss you"
I hope for a vain expectation but now it's useless

What is it about that person next to you, did he make you cry?
Dear can you even see me, did you forget completely?

I am worried, I feel anxiety because I can't get close nor try to talk to you
I spend long nights by myself, erasing my thoughts a thousand times
[Chorus]
Don't look back and leave
Don't find me again and live (on)
Because I have no regrets from loving you, take only the good memories
I can bear it in some way
I can stand in some way
You should be happy if you are like this
I become dull day by day (eh eh eh eh)
Oh girl I cry, cry
You're my all, say goodbye...

If we pass by each other on the street
Act like you didn't see me and go the way you were walking to
If you keep thinking about our past memories
I might go look for you secretly

Always be happy with him, (so) I won't ever get a different mind
Even smallest regret won't be left out ever
Please live well as if I should feel jealous
You should always be like that bright sky, like that white cloud
Yes, you should always smile like that as if nothing happened

[Chorus]

I hope your heart fees relieved
Please forget about me and live (on)
Those tears will dry completely
As time passes by
It would've hurt less if we didn't meet at all (mm)
Hope you will bury our promise of being together forever baby
I pray for you

[Chorus]

Oh girl I cry, cry
You're my all, say goodbye, bye
Oh my love don't lie, lie
You're my heart, say goodbye

 

 

then the second song was tiltled LIES

 

Yeah (love is pain)dedicated to all my broken hearted people. One’s old flame, just scream my name and I’m so sick of love songs. Yeah hate damn love songs. Memento of ours… Lies!

A late night and rain falling down. I bring you back from my memories. I promised myself I would be fine without you, but I can’t help it. I take in liquor which I don’t even know how to handle trying to fill my empty heart. A day without you is too long. I pray that I may please forget you (that’s a lie).

Without you happiness cannot be found in me. I can’t even shed any tears. I don’t want to live anymore.

Yeah, this is bull, it’s pissing me off. I’m going crazy in thoughts of you. I want to see you, but *I was told that I could not, that it’s all over (I’ll be right there).

I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I didn’t know, but I know now that I need you. I’m so sorry, but I love you, out of anger. I pushed you away with those piercing words without realizing. I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I’m so sorry (I’m so sorry), but I love you (I love you more more). I’m so sorry, but I love you, will you leave and forget me slowly, so I can be in pain?

I dedicated my all into this song for you (other people probably don’t know). By myself, without anyone knowing. (yeah, those words I said were lies). A loner left in the midst of it all. In my pocket is the breakup letter that’s all wrinkled and folded up in my pocket, hey, (and my habit of calling for you and wondering where you are). I’m gonna change, I’ll laugh everything off from now on.

I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I didn’t know, but I know now that I need you. I’m so sorry, but I love you, out of anger. I pushed you away with those piercing words without realizing. I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I’m so sorry (I’m so sorry), but I love you (I love you more more). I’m so sorry, but I love you, will you leave and forget me slowly, so I can be in pain?

Oh oh oh oh oh, I hope this is all a dream. Oh oh oh oh oh, because I only add up to this much. Drop that babe, I still can’t forget you. No I don’t think I ever will, even ’til the day I die, yeah. Did the scars I gave you heal? I’m sorry because I never got to do anything for you.

I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I didn’t know, but I know now that I need you. I’m so sorry, but I love you, out of anger. I pushed you away with those piercing words without realizing. I’m so sorry, but I love you, it’s all a lie. I’m so sorry (I’m so sorry), but I love you (I love you more more). I’m so sorry, but I love you, will you leave and forget me slowly, so I can be in pain?

 

 

then our performance ended

the crowd applauded

 

 

those two songs

 

 

 

really struck my heart

 

 

they represent how i feel right now

 

is it all a lie dara??

 

what we had was just a lie, right??

 

 

you never loved me,did you??

 

 

 

but still i hope you all the best

may he never hurt or make you cry

 

 

 

"hyung we did great!!"-seungri

 

"maybe because our leader is just nothing but AWESOME!!"-taeyang

 

"hey!!we all did our best !!"

 

"i'm glad you listened to me,jiyong!!"-top

 

"tnx hyung :)"

 

"hey!!hey!!can we eat now ,i'm starving!!erkkkk!!hear that !!it's my stomach!!erkkk!!"-daesung

 

"iww hyung you're so gross!!!"-seungri

 we all laughed

 

then we ate at that same restaurant

 

the owner liked our performance and gave us free dinner

he also said we are gonna a regular performer in this place

 

we are so happy.

 

 

while eating i saw a couple from a nearby table

 

they reminded me of us before

 

 

 

 

i took a deep breath and smiled

 

 

then top hyung patted my back

 

"everything's gonna be okay,ji"

 

"tnx hyung :)"

 

 

 

after eating,we said our goodbyes at each other

 

on my way home,a group of men blocked my way

 

"remember me??"

 

a guy spoke

 

 

he's the same guy i beaten up

 

the one with the girl

 

"leave me alone"

 

 

i triesd to walk away but he grabbed my colllar

 

"my girl broke up with me!!!and that's all because of you!!!you s** o* a b****!!!"

 

he punched  me..

 

i fell on the ground

 

"it's not my fault dumba**!!maybbe she realized how stupid you are!!!"

 

then the others started to attack me

 

 

i fought but they're too many

 

 

they left

 

 

i was left on the street

 

on  the ground

 

 

i saw figure standing in  front of me

 

"you again??"

 

it's black hood

 

 

as usual he started to treat my wounds again

 

 

i can't see his face

 

he's wearing a mask aside from the hood

 

"who are you??"

 

he didn't replied

 

"hey!!answer me you bastard!!!"

 

"show me your face you stupid coward!!"

 

"are you ugly??are you a ghost??"

 

"HEY!!"

 

 

he just doing his thing on my wounds not minding my questions

 

if only i have the strength to remove his mask but i was too weak to even move a finger

 

 

"have you fallen in love??"

 

"you know i love this girl,but she left me"

 

"that girl changed me,i thought she loved me but it's all a lie.i'm a fool,right??you can laugh at me GO ON!!I AM SUCH A

STUPID JERK!!but you know why??i still love her...bigtime!!she still holds my heart...my aching heart!!!but she's in another man's arms now!!can't bring her back anymore...she will not come back"

 

he stood up

 

"hey!!"

 

i hold his hand

 

 

 

this is so familiar

 

his hand is so familiar

 

 

he took it and ran

 

 

 

vanished in the dark

 

 

 

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

 

hey guys sorry for late update

 

got hospitalized for two days plus it's finals week

 

i'm really sorry guys

 

hope you understand and still read my story :))

 

just feel free to comment

 

 

CHING!!!

otakuFG