I wanted to help Jimin but actually I was just trying to help myself to not think of the past. We were both in a complicated situation and I was the one being the messed up person.

I didn’t talk to anyone beside Yoongi after that day. Jimin was still with Hana and I was still having my own problems. Yoongi seemed worried about me, he sent a few texts to me about how was I feeling that day, my answers would be the same ‘I’m fine’ or ‘Okay, I guess’ but I was upset about something else. Jimin didn’t ask me anything about that day, he didn’t wave or greeted me anymore. It was like we didn’t even know our names.

Jongup and Hana were still staying strong, sometimes I saw Jongup getting a little overprotective towards Hana whenever Jimin came by. Sometimes I would see three of them laughing at one another and I was starting to envy their relationship. I couldn’t bother Yoongi that much since he had a girlfriend to care about.

Jongup talked to me one day when I was busy in the library but I let him talk.

“Hey, Hana’s birthday is soon and I was asking if you would like to come to my house to celebrate it” He asked, while I was busy writing my notes. “No thanks” I spoke, a little cold, without looking at him. “Are you sure?”

I nodded and he removed his hands from the desk. “Well okay then if you say so” His footsteps looked hesitated to moved away but slowly I couldn’t see him anymore.

I sighed as I put my pen down. I was still stressed out about Jimin but he wouldn’t know about it. He wouldn’t even know that I still think about him. But my ex-boyfriend’s face would appear every single time. Why was I being so complicated?

I packed up my stuff and went out of the library. I saw few other students near the place and one of them was Hana. I wanted to hide from her but she spotted me and quickly ran to me.

“I heard you’re not coming to Jongup’s house” She said, her tone sounded sad. I just nodded at her, I wasn’t in the mood to talk to her. Her hand was placed on my arm, and her eyes looked at me warmly.

“Yunhee, I know what’s going on” She spoke. “No, you don’t” I replied, a little mad. She looked at me like I was someone she didn’t know.

“It’s about Jimin, right?”

“No” I quickly said, and passed by her. I didn’t want to hear Jimin’s name anymore. Because nothing would ever happen to us both. So why would I bother to care about him?

I received few texts by Hana that I didn’t reply back. She was concerned and I wanted to tell her that she shouldn’t think too much about it. But I didn’t want to show that I could easily be friend again with someone. For once, I wanted to show how much I had to suffer through all of this alone and be strong about it.

Day by day passed, I was slowly drifting apart from Jimin, Yoongi, Hana and Jongup. I was desolated myself from them and I was feeling better. I was beginning to think the stuff happened in the past was just nothing. Maybe it was just in my head.

Until I saw Jimin with a girl. And it wasn’t Hana.

They were walking together, too close for my liking. Jimin was laughing and smiling with the girl and I was hurt that I had to see it with my own eyes. I sighed deeply and changed my direction to keep my heart from scattering more.

I entered my class, and I saw the girl inside with him. I raised my eyebrow, I never saw her before. Or maybe I paid too much attention to the teacher or probably Jimin. I glared unconsciously at her before sitting down at my usual seat.

I was tempted to text Hana. But she would find out that I still keep my eyes on Jimin. I scrolled down to see Yoongi’s name on my contact. I hadn’t been talking to Yoongi for weeks, I was too scared that he would forgotten about me or that I was the one that forgot about him.

I took a deep breath and clicked the dial button. “Hello?” Yoongi’s voice like he just woke up. “Hey, Yoongi. It’s Yunhee”

He went quiet for a while and I heard him sighing. “Hey, Yunhee” He said. “Why did you call me?” He asked.

“I want to ask you… about Jimin” I told him, closing my eyes. He turned quiet again before answering me back. “Meet me at the ice cream shop in 10 minutes and I’ll answer whatever you have in mind” And then he hung up, leaving me confused.

Yoongi his ice cream and he seemed fine. I was staring at him while my ice cream. I was getting impatient and he noticed and chuckled at me. “So it’s about Jimin?”

I nodded. His expression changed into somewhat sad. “Sorry, Yunhee but… Jimin seemed to found another girl” Yoongi’s hand reached on mine, giving a light squeeze. “He called me the other day, how to impressed a girl and how did I get my girlfriend, I thought he was talking about you”

“So I suggested some ideas and I was happy” He continued, his voice slowly turn a little quieter. “I was happy because it was you and maybe after all the things happened, maybe he would realized he likes you”

I didn’t notice that I was starting to tear up. My eyes became blurry. “Yunhee, I’m so sorry” He said. I shook my head. “It’s alright, Yoongi. I didn’t even do anything to make him like me” I said, my voice cracked. “I don’t even deserve him, I was just trying replace my ex by thinking about him. I’m so stupid” I stood up quickly and wiped my tears. “I should be the one that has to apologize, you shouldn’t feel bad about it, Yoongi” I said, bowing at me and went out of the place.

 

I cried that night. Really hard. I wanted to choke myself because I was still thinking of Jimin. What hurt me the most was that I couldn’t anything about it.

I remembered Jongup telling me what had happened in the past. He was helping Hana to get Jongup but he got hurt by it and he didn’t even tell them. Maybe it was time for him to find his happiness with another girl, not with me.

Maybe I was now in Jimin’s path. I was helping him to move on, even if I knew I was going to be nothing to him.

A text came after a couple of days I met Yoongi, and the text was from Jimin. He asked me if I wanted to hang out in the afternoon but I rejected him. Seeing him was the last thing I wanted to see him at the weekend.

He texted again the following week, but I ignored it. I avoided him in class and often I just see him with the girl from far. I told myself that he wouldn’t even going to talk to me when he was with the girl. So I decided to past by him, acting like I was fine.

“Yunhee” His voice came into me, I froze. “Shin Yunhee”

I turned, and I saw his arm around the girl’s waist. “Answer my texts, okay” He said, smiling. My eyes went to the girl beside him. She blinked and whispered at him. “She’s just a friend, babe” He said, pinching her nose cutely.

My heart was crushed once more, and I smiled weakly. “Sorry, I’ve been busy” I replied, looking at the floor. “It’s alright, anyway, we have to go” He said, waving at me before pulling the girl’s hand into his playfully.

“Yah, Park Jimin! I told you not to pull me like that again!” The girl yelled and Jimin’s laughter filled the hallway.

“Stupid heart, stop breaking” I mumbled as I walked in heavy steps.

I replied his text with a ‘sure’ when he asked if I wanted to hang out a week after I met him. It was probably a better thing to do, besides crying alone in my room. I tidied myself with my casual white tee and black skinny jeans and a pair of Converse shoes.

I fixed my hair and I sighed. I shouldn’t even dress up nicely because he wouldn’t care if I did. I took my bag and headed to the fast food restaurant that he suggested.

Jimin was sitting near the window and he saw me as I walked pass him outside. He gestured his hand to come in excitedly and I was smiling widely. “You came on time” He said, looking at his watch. “Usually girls come late, do their make up or something” He mentioned.

“Well maybe because they want to look nice when meeting a guy, that’s why they came late” I stated casually. “But you look nice and you’re on time” He said back, smiling. I blushed and looked away. “Stop lying at yourself, Jimin” I told me, after gaining back my usual self.

“I am not, I’m telling the truth”

“Whatever”

Jimin started talking about the university and he went a lot deeper than I expected him to. “Have you ever cried because of a guy?”

I was surprised at his question and I shook my head reluctantly.

“Really?” He asked, tilting his head. I furrowed my eyebrow, did he expect me to say yes and I would tell him everything?

“Do I look like I would cry because of a guy?” I snapped angrily. Jimin was taken back and shook his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get you mad about this” He said.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. “I’m sorry, I’ve been stressing about things” I replied, opening my eyes to see him giving a confused look.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I kept quiet. “Jimin, are we friends?” I asked. He nodded his head and smiled. “Of course, we’re friends”

“Are you worried just because you think that I didn’t consider you as my friend?” He asked, and I was about to reply back but he continued.

“I was the one worried that you didn’t want me to be your friend. You looked sad whenever I see you in class and I wanted to cheer you up”

But Jimin, I was sad because of you. I wanted to say that out loud but he looked happy at the moment.

“So are you fine now?” I nodded and he cheered to himself cutely. I chuckled and shook my head. “You’re such a kid, Jimin”

He pouted and crossed his arms. “I’m not a kid, I’m a man” He showed off his biceps at me and I gulped and got nervous. I stopped him but slapping his arms away and talked about things.

We got to know each other really quickly, I was finally smiling again and he made me laugh with his playful remarks. But one question was in my head, I didn’t know if I should ask but I did.

“You want to know about my girlfriend?” His eyebrow raised and stared at me. “Yes” I said, staring back at him. “My girlfriend?” He asked again. I grew annoyed and he was making it like he didn’t expect that would come out.

“Yes, Jimin. Your girlfriend”

“Well, we broke up”

I was far from happy, because I could see Jimin was broken. “Who broke it off?” I asked, unsure if I should ask it. “She did”

“Want to talk about it?”

He slowly nodded, and naturally I held his hand. It saddened me to see him like that, and I was being selfish for him to cheer me up when actually he needed someone to cheer him up.

“A few days ago, I looked at her and I felt like I didn’t know her. She was wearing thick make-up and tight dresses. We went to the park and guys were looking at her. I tried to stop them… but she didn’t even try to stop” He explained and I nodded for him to continue.

“That night when I brought her home, I asked her why she was like that” His eyes slowly closed and his other hand reached and held my hand tightly. “She said she didn’t like me anymore, that I was immature and a kid that she doesn’t like in a guy”

“But why did she told me she like me in the first place? I was so confused and I wanted to say I was sorry but she suddenly told me that she wanted to break up with me”

“I’m sorry, Jimin” I whispered to him.

“It’s alright” He opened his eyes and smiled weakly. “I was wrong to think she was the one”

I looked back at him, patting his arm lightly. “You’ll find the one soon” I smiled reassuring, and his smile that I miss reappeared on his face.

“Thanks, Yunhee”

We got closer each day and we helped each other with our studies. I called Yoongi about our progress and he was happy for me. He even told me that Jimin should know that I was the one for him but I snapped back at him that he shouldn’t say that because I wasn’t.

“Let’s go to the park today, I need a fresh air!” Jimin exclaimed, coming out of the class. I laughed and slapped his arm. “We went there yesterday” I said and he grinned. “I need more fresh air” He said, and pouted as he rubbed his arm. “That hurts”

“Whatever, Jimin” I rolled my eyes playfully. We were pushing each other to the side and crack a joke as we walked out the university. I was too absorbed making fun of Jimin that I didn’t notice Jongup and Hana in front of us.

“Oh hey guys!” Jimin squeaked loudly and I moved away from him. “So loud, Park Jimin”

“Whatever” He stuck out his tongue and looked back at the couple. Hana and Jongup looked at me, and I could read their mind. I shook my head and Jimin stared at me. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing” I pushed him lightly and grinned looking at the couple. “Yah!” Jimin managed to balance himself. “I haven’t seen you both in a long time” Jimin said, coming back beside me. I nodded, but I remembered I was avoiding them before.

“Yeah, it’s been really long since I can see that you’re close with Yunhee now” Jongup smirked with Hana. I immediately kicked his leg and he groaned in pain. “We just got close” Jimin said, oblivious about me kicking Jongup.

“Well, it’s nice to see you guys finally get together” Jongup said, moving his eyebrows up and down. Jimin looked confused. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing, Jimin” Hana replied, patting his head. “Let’s go, Jongup” She pulled her boyfriend away from us and I turned back to see them mouthing ‘hwaiting’ at me.

“I feel so lost, like a lost cute puppy” He commented about himself. “No, a lost ugly guy named Park Jimin. That’s what you are” I stated, running off before he would whine.

“Hey, I’m quite handsome, okay! Wait up!” He screamed before catching up on me.

-

“When are you going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?” Yoongi squinted his eyes. “Don’t act like you don’t know”

“I really don’t know what are you talking about” I said, biting my burger. “You’re really are so clueless” He rolled his eyes. I shrugged and bit my burger again.

“When are you going to tell Jimin that you like him?”

“At the right time, if there is a right time” I said, tapping my chin with my index finger. “Well better tell him sooner or later”

“I’m just worried that he’ll turn me down and doesn’t want to talk to me again” I said frantically. “He won’t, I mean maybe he’ll get surprised and doesn’t know to say or – ” I glared at him and cleared his throat.

“But he would still talk to you, he’s Jimin”

“Yeah, he’s Jimin, who just broke up with his girlfriend few weeks ago”

“God, Yunhee, you’re making yourself suffer, why won’t you just go for it?” Yoongi said, his tone was a little mad and I wasn’t used to that.

“I’m scared, Yoongi”

Yoongi kept quiet then he stood up. “Face it confidently, Yunhee. I know you can deal with this smoothly and you’ll be fine, I promise” He walked away and I was left alone. Or I thought I would be, because suddenly Jimin appeared right in front of me. He smiled and sat down.

“Yoongi said you wanted to tell me something. So what is it?” He asked while I was nervous to say what I had in my mind. And another note that I had to strangle Yoongi after this was done.

“Jimin” His expression brightened as I speak. My heart was beating fast and I was getting ready to say it.

“Yeah?”

“I like you” I finally confessed.

I looked at him, hoping he would laugh it off or maybe smiled back and turned me down nicely because like Yoongi said ‘He’s Jimin’ but I didn’t get any of that. Instead I got a frown from him and his expression turned different from what I always see him as.

He didn’t say anything and I felt like the silence was killing me alive. I just made my biggest mistake ever.

---

Next chapter will be the last one, I hope!

Please subscribe and comment, thanks!