YOSEOB'S POV

May 28, 2011

I was in front of the TV, watching our performance from  last night. We sang beautifully. But I was only paying attention to a person. Doojoon may be the leader of the group but I'll follow this guy wherever and whenever. I smiled as I saw him move on stage. When he looked into the camera, I felt like he was staring into my soul. I blushed. Maybe that's how the fangirls felt whenever they watched us on stage. I continued watching. He looked so serious performing our title song.

Someone opened the door. Gikwang entered the room.

"I'm home." He chanted happily, half screaming. I rolled my eyes. Why does he has to be happy all the time?

"Eeehhh? Where's everyone?" He asked me when he saw no reaction.

"Hyunseung and Dongwoon went to get some groceries. Doojoon went to play soccer, I believed he forget that we'll have a long dance practice tomorrow." I told him.

"And?" He raised his eyebrows, making his small eyes larger. He looked weird whenever he does that. I frowned.

"And what?" I asked him back.

"Junhyung? Where is he?" He asked me. I hated the question. And above all, I hate the answer.

"He went out." I replied, half-heartedly. My grip on the remote was tightened. I was lucky that he was oblivious to everything and he just shrugged it off.

"Maybe he went out with Hara. They are so cute together. I'm so jealous of him. I want a girlfriend too." He said that and left me there. But I heard his words, and those words rang in my head. Repeatedly. I was glad he left me. Because I wouldn't know how to explain to him, about the tears that were about to escape my eyes.

"Seobie?? Do you want to eat?" He yelled from the room. I wiped my tears.

"No, you go ahead."

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FLASHBACK

YOSEOB'S POV

September 23rd, 2010.

It was 3am, but we were still out. The manager was taking a day off, so we went ahead and used the chance to sneak out. We had went to the small stalls at the roadside. We had ate the things that the manager would kill us if he knew we did. We drank. I was not a good drinker, so I was starting to get a little tipsy after the second shot, but he still seemed fine. We laughed a lot that night. He hold my waist because I lost my balance after the drink. We walked for a while until he stopped at the park. He took his hand off my waist, but he held my hand, leading me to a bench. I was feeling a little dizzy, so I just sat there.

"Junhyung-ah, why are we here?" I asked him.

"It's a beautiful night. I just want to see the stars." He replied, without looking at me.

"Yeah. I think so. I don't know. I'm drunk." I said to him, jokingly. But not the drunk part. I was a little drunk.

"Do you believe in the wishing star?" He asked me. He won't ask things like this at other times, but tonight, he did.

"I never thought about it. Do you?" I asked him again. He didn't answer. He looked at me instead. He smiled.

"I do. I wished, and it was granted. " He grinned. I stood up. Walking towards him.

"Tell me. What did you wish for?" I asked him.

"No way." He turned around and walked away. I walked faster, but I lost my balance. I managed to grab his hand from behind. He turned around immediately, holding my waist so I wouldn't fall. I stood up, trying to stabilize my body posture. I looked up, and to my surprise, he was there, his face only a few inches from mine. I blinked a few times.

"You're going to answer me now?" I asked, out of nowhere.

Well, we were friends, but it was pretty awkward staring at each other in silence. So, I shot him that question. He looked at my eyes, like he was trying to figure out what I was thinking, who I was. He didn't back off, or trying to pull away. We jst got closer. I felt his hot breath on my skin. I can feel him breathing on my skin. I was blushing like hell. I must be imagining things. I closed my eyes, hoping that everything would be clearer when I opened them again. But the moment I closed my eyes, I felt something on my lips. Something warm and soft. I it, trying to figure out what it was. I was getting dizzier by the moment. I felt something muscular trying to find its way into my mouth. I tried pushing it away with my tongue. I realized something, so I opened my eyes. I pushed him away. I rubbed my eyes. He looked at me puzzled.

"I must be really drunk now. We are drunk." I said to him, trying to laughed it off. His shoulder slumped. I took his hand, dragging him away from the place, heading home. But he didn't move an inch. I turned back. I looked at him.

"I wished for you."

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Evening. May 21, 2011

I hugged him from behind, surprising him.

"Guess who?" I whispered in his ears. He was finding something in the kitchen. Conveniently, we have the house by ourselves because the other member asked our manager to left them at the grocery shop. They'll walk home by themselves.

"Seobie…" I always loved the way he called my name. He turned around. I gave him a peck on his cheek.

"That's your prize for guessing it right." I said to him. He smiled. But his eyes looked sad.

"What’s wrong?" I asked, worried.

"Nothing. Don't worry." I didn't want to force him because I knew that he'll always find me when he needed to, and if he didn't want to talk, it meant that he was not ready to do so. So, I tried to change the subject. I followed him to the couch. I placed my head on his shoulder. My head fit perfectly on his shoulder.

"I need to tell you something." He said. I looked up.

"What is it baby?" I asked. I swore that I saw him swallowed his saliva. He looked nervous, yet serious.

"Junhyung-ah. Why so serious?" I chuckled. I always find that the nervous side of Junghyun is cute.

"I want to end this." He said. My smile died. I sat up straight, looking at his face. He looked at the ceiling. Maybe he was looking for the perfect words to explain everything, but I don't believe he'll find any that would rationalize his act.

"What do you mean?" I managed to ask him that. I at the calendar behind him, just in case I was missing something obvious. But, no. It was not April 1st. I felt my eyes getting blurry.

"Whatever we have now. It's not real. I don't want to lead you on any further." He said, calmly.

"Lead me on? But I thought…" I wanted to say that I thought he really loved me, like I did.

"I met someone. You know her. Hara. She's the one for me." He didn't even look at me when he said those hurtful words. Tears fell on my cheek. I didn't sob or anything, but the tears fell anyway. I stood up, I want to walk away from him. I only walked a couple of steps when he called me.

"Seobie-ah, we're guys, so whatever we had won't work anyway. It was just a mistake, so let's forget it. We can still be friends right." He said, still so calmly. There were no traces of guilt in his voice. I walked towards him. He stood up. I looked straight into his empty eyes. The cold eyes that I can’t figure out. I clenched my fists. I wanted to hurt him, just like how he made me feel right now. I wanted to hit him, so that he could at least feel something. But I looked into his eyes, and the feeling died inside of me. I was hurt, but I can't hate him. The tears didn’t want to stop. I took a deep breath, trying to compose myself calm.

"Remember when you told me, I was a fool for accepting you? I'm starting to believe that too."

He opened his mouth, but then noises were heard outside. I knew the others were home. I walked away. But Junhyung grabbed my hand. I stopped, but I didn't look back.

"I'm sorry…" He whispered. I pulled my hands and walk away.

END OF FLASHBACKS

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"We're back!!!" Doojoon, Hyunseung and the maknae entered the house. I looked at them, then at the clock on the wall. My eyes widened. It was almost 10pm. I was lost in my own thoughts for hours. Gikwang joined the crowd.

"I'm glad you're back. I was bored." Gikwang said to everyone.

"What do you mean? Yoseob was home all the time right?" Hyunseung asked. I didn't want him to investigate more because he was not as oblivious as Gikwang, so I interrupted them.

"I'm hungry. Did you bring anything to eat?" I asked with happy face. I knew Hyunseung would have to drop the matter if I did that.

"Sure, let's eat."

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JUNHYUNG'S POV

I was home late enough that no one was awake. I smiled bitterly. I opened the door, hoping that it would not wake anyone up. The TV was on. And no one switched off the light. I looked at the couch, someone was on it. Covered by blanket. I couldn't see who he was, but I could guess. It must be Doojoon. He must've fall asleep while watching soccer, again. I went closer to wake him up. I pulled the blanket off slowly. It was not Doojoon.

This person was the reason I went out alone the whole day, pretending to be out with my girlfriend. I knew he don't have any schedule today, and so did I. But I can't stay home alone with him. I hurt him too much that I can't face him. We did fake some conversations to avoid suspicions and he was so good at it. He laughed, smiled at me when people were around but he would have 180 degree turn when no one was around. He would act like I wasn't even there.

I saw Yoseob frowned at the sudden expose to light. I turned off the light quickly. The TV was on. So I could still see his face in the dim light. I missed that face, the smiling face of his. I always warned him not to act cute in front of me when there were other members because I was scared that I couldn't resist kissing him at the moment. I was always jealous when he was there for everyone when they needed someone. I wanted him to be mine, and mine alone. I touched his soft hair. He moved a little by the touch. I held my breath. I didn't want him to wake up, seeing me this close. I wanted to kiss him so bad. But I can't. I stood up slowly, leaving him there.

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FLASHBACK

JUNHYUNG'S POV

Morning, May 21, 2011

"You have to end this." our manager said. He said that to me when we were alone.

I looked at his angry face. I was shocked.

"But I love him." I replied. I was not scared of losing my career.

"Did any of the member knew about your relationship with him?" he asked me. I shook my head. Yoseob and I wanted to wait until we were really ready.

"You're lucky that I am the only one who knew about this." he sighed.

"I'm not going to break up with him." I said with determination. He looked at me with his hand on my shoulder.

"I know you love him, but this is not something that people would accept easily. You can lose your job, your fans." he explained to me the obvious.

"I love my fans. I love my career but if I have to choose, I'll pick him every time."

He looked at me, disbelieved. He took a deep breath.

"I know you would. But, I want you to think carefully. I believe he feels the same for you, but if you guys got together, you'll lose everything. Like you've said earlier, you don't care. But do you really have the heart to see him letting his dream go? He wanted to do this, and he tried and trained really hard to get where he is now. Do you want him to let go of his dream?" he asked me. I couldn’t answer. I didn’t know the answer. I wanted to be with him, but then, I wanted him to live his dream.

"Junhyung, listen to me. You can, he can find another person to love. But this dream that he had, there's only one. He lose it, he'll lose everything. I can’t force you, but I believe you'll be wise." he patted me on my shoulder and left.

That evening I broke up with him and he stopped talking to me whenever we were alone. I was hurt too, and I missed him. But I guess, it was better if he ignored me, because I was scared that I would tell him the truth if I got the chance to talk to him. I guess, it was better for both of us if we stayed like that.

 

 

"Yang Yoseob, I love you. Has loved you yesterday, still loving you today and will love you forever."

<3 <3 <3

 

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Another story done when I was supposed to finish my BOYFRIEND fic. =_="

Anyways, what do you think about GooHyung@GooJun@JunHara?

Like always, comments are loved, so.. DO COMMENT ~~

Peace (N_n)y

And I did a sequel for this oneshot, THAT'S THE WAY I LOVE YOU. Here's the link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/55196/that-s-the-way-i-love-you-oneshot-sequel-to-it-can-t-be-helped-beast-dooseob-dujun-junhyung-junseob--yoseob Read it, and comment please. <3