in this cold day
Teardrop in the Rain [oneshot]
Final »
❝in this cold day❞
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» I grunted as another gust swept on my feet. I pulled my feet inside the blanket. I heard drizzles outside my window. Another rainy day. I patted my side to check if she's already awake. Then, I remembered. She is gone.
I opened my dried eyes carefully because it hurt. The cold air stung inside, making my eyes watery. It’s been 100 days since that day. The worst day of my life.
I stood up and get ready for work. Work. Who am I have been working for? It seems so senseless to me.
I ducked under the sink and opened the cabinet. I get the frying pan and cracked the eggs on it. Am I doing it right?
“Ani. Not like that. You should heat the pan first. Then, put a little amount of oil since it’s a nonstick pan.” She guided my hands as I nodded like an idiot.
Aish! I sighed. Nevermind. I turned the stove on and put the pan over it. Even when I do it right, she will never comeback for me.
I flipped the egg over and over. Oh no. I forgot the salt. I quickly got it and shook it until the small particles come out. Then, unexpectedly, the all the salt poured. I groaned. I am good at nothing but disaster. I turned off the stove and leave the mess. I rummage the cupboard and found cupped noodles. I think this would be easy to prepare.
As I wait for the water to boil, my eyes caught the white guitar hanging on the wall. I reached for it and blew the dusts.
“Now, this is my favorite song.” She strummed dramatically. Hearing her gentle sweet voice makes me want to kiss and hug her. It’s very serene.
“That’s cute. Tell me how to play it.” I gave her a wide smile. I am very confident about singing it to her.
She showed me the chords. Oh. I remembered these. JinYoung hyung taught me how to play this.
After I got ready, I sat there lifelessly. Why am all dressed up? Going to work look pointless. Visiting her? No, I don’t want to look back again. Alright. Maybe I can see her a bit.
I walk quietly in the road with puddles. It’s summer but why do I feel cold? Yes, it rained a while ago but the cold is like it snowed. Look. The sun is shining down on me. How come I still freeze? Is it because of her? Is it because of being lonely?
“Jagiya, I want a balloon.” She pointed the skinny man with a handful of balloons. I smiled. She looks like a kid.
“Can I buy all of these?” I asked and handed the man sufficient amount of money. He grinned and gave me the strings.
“Here. Be careful and do not jump. You might want to stay on the ground while holding these.” I joked.
“Very funny. Should I laugh now?” I narrowed my eyes on her as she giggled.
Those pretty hazel brown eyes. Those rosy cheeks in her fair white skin.
I miss her so much. I’m not really used to a day without her on my side. Now, her memories are the only thing I have from her.
I suddenly found myself on her favorite park. It’s calmer than the usual. Before, there were children playing and we used to watch them.
“Look at those cute kids.” She sighed and leaned on my shoulder. “I wish I can go back to my childhood. It’s very fun.”
I beamed. “I know now why you act like a child.” I grinned. “A child who doesn’t know how to ride a bike.”
“It isn’t my fault why my mom never let me learn how to ride on a bicycle.” She pouted. “Can you teach me?”
I smiled. Recalling the memories makes me feel lighter. But, it also makes me want to see her.
“Okay. Keep going.” I said while leading her. I put my right hand on the saddle and my left on the handlebar.
“Baro-yah! Don’t let go! If you do, you’re dead before we got home.” She screamed as she kicked the pedal faster. “I won’t fall, right? I trust you.”
I let go and draw near her. She’s doing it right!
“Yah! You’re already good at it!” I happily said. I noticed the bike is slightly swiveling so I quickly set her on balanced before she could fall.
“Omo!” She excitedly squealed. “I did it! Baro-ah, did you see it?”
“Ne.” I gave her thumbs up. “A little practice and we’re almost there.”
She stood up and hugged me. “Omo! Saranghae!” And she kisses me.
I closed my eyes while bringing her to mind. Tears suddenly flow from my eyes. Why does it have to be this way? Why can’t I have you here just like it used to be?
I got one of the bikes standing there. I don’t know where I’m heading to and I don’t care. Which I care about now is you. I worry about you. About where you are right now.
How can I find a way to go on? How can I go on without you? I know it’s been 100 days but it’s just a hundred of days. It’s not as long as three years.
Three years. I’ve been waiting all those years for the right time. Why didn’t I encounter the right day? I know I am impatient, but I still wait for her to come back. I am not sure if she is still coming back.
I boosted faster. I don’t care who I bumped into. People don’t know what I feel right now. They don’t feel the pain. Why do I care about them?
As I reached my destination, I screamed. I yelled all I can. At that time, the rain poured. It’s like the clouds also cried back at me. I shouted more. The clouds roared as I howled angrily. I fell into my knees and tried to wipe my tears. I know it has no use.
I walked silently and droopily to her place. I felt like I am not Cha Baro. The Baro who always laugh. The lively Baro. The energetic Cha SunWoo. I don’t know that person right now.
As soon as I saw her, I sat on the ground.
“Mianhae if I shouted like that. I know this is a blessed place, but I’m really mad.” I sobbed and gasped the air I’ve been wanting to. “I-I am not really used of being alone. Why did you leave me? I’ve loved you to death.”
Death. It struck me at my heart. I fell silent and sat there like a ghost.
“Why can’t I be a—“ Ghost. I can’t say it well. “Why can’t I be with you?”
And I stared at the white surface, with her name engraved on it, silently while the rain showers down calmly.
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Author'sNote
» That's it. I thought it was going to be JinYoung-free but, I can't help it! asdfghjkl;' Haha.. Sorry if the story has a lot of grammatical errors ^o^v
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