"Mom, when will my brother go out of your stomach?"

His mom chuckled at his innocent remark. She brushed his hair lightly before replying,

"Soon, Myungsoo. You know, our neighbor is pregnant too."

"The warm neighbor who always brings cupcakes?"

"Yes. Her stomach will also be big a few months from now."

Myungsoo smiled excitedly and nodded. He prodded his chin and replied, "I wonder what she looks like when that happens."

"Then the baby inside me... What would his name be? You can pick it."

His eyes lit up in glee. "Jinjja?"

"Yes," his mother nodded.

Myungsoo smiled. "Jongin."

 

...

 

"Mom. Can I touch him?" he asked in a whisper.

"Of course Myungsoo," his mother said weakly.  "But be careful."

He was three when Myungsoo felt the body of his little brother. He smiled as the little body moved.

It's warm and it moves. It's alive.

He kissed the baby's cheeks and whispered, "Welcome to the world, Jongin."

 

...

 

"Hello there Myungsoo."

Myungsoo smiled as the voice sounded very familiar.

"Hello Mrs.Bae. It's been a long time since your last visit."

The woman chortled. "I'm sorry Myungsoo, but now, we moved back again to the house next to yours."

"So you're our neighbor again?" the boy titled his head to the side.

"Yes, Myungsoo."

He beamed at the wonderful news. The wondeful cupcakes and the warmth he missed was back again.

But then, there was another surprise waiting for him.

"By the way," Mrs. Bae said and tapped the head of the girl who had been hiding behind her back. "This is my daughter, Suji."

Myungsoo smiled again.

"Hello Suji."

"Hello," the little girl replied shyly, still clinging at the hem of her mother's shirt. Myungsoo beamed upon hearing the girl's soft voice.

"How old are you?" he asked.

"Three," she answered quickly.

"Ahh," Myungsoo nodded happily. "I have a brother who has the same age with you. I hope you two will get along."

 

...

 

"Oppa!" Suji said as she shook Myungsoo's body. She clung tightly onto the male's arm as she complained, "Oppa, Jongin stole my cupcake."

"Jinjja? Jongin, stop stealing Suji's food."

Suji poked her tongue out to the five year-old Jongin and smiled cheekily.

"But she stole my food too the other day!" Jongin complained as he pointed at her.

 The smile on Suji's face faded as she shook her head hardly in denial.

"Is that true Suji?" Myungsoo asked and turned towards the girl. 

Guilty, she looked down and mumbled, "Yes."

Myungsoo chuckled and ruffled the girl's fringe before saying,  "Stealing is bad. Jongin, give me back the cupcake."

Suji and Jongin exchanged glares before Jongin gave the cupccake to his brother with an obvious pout on his lips.

Myungsoo then, carefully broke the cupcake into two before giving it to the two kids. "Siblings and friends should share."

"We're sorry hyung."

"It's okay. Just don't do it again, hmm?"

"Oppa, open your mouth."

"Huh?" Myungsoo asked but then he opened his mouth and Suji fed him a part of a cupcake.

"Friends and siblings should share," the girl giggle cutely

Then the two five year-old kids kissed Myungsoo on his cheeks.

 

...

 

Suji hugged Myungsoo tightly as she announced, "Oppa, we're going!"

Myungsoo nodded and tapped her back lightly, "Hmmm. Take care. I hope your first day at middle school goes well."

Suji then tiptoed and attempted to kiss Myungsoo on the cheek but Jongin pushed her face away.

"Stop making my hyung's face dirty," he scolded her.

Suji threw him a look before quickly and finally, stealing a kiss from Myungsoo.

"Yah!" Jongin exclaimed.

Suji just laughed and ran away before halting to wave and shout,  "Bye oppa!"

Jongin just found the corner of his lips rising into a smile as he watched her.

He then whispered, "Hyung, Suji braided her hair today."

Myungsoo smiled and nodded. "She's growing up."

 

...

 

"Hyuuuuuunnggggg," Jongin said as he ran towards Myungsoo and sat beside him at the sofa.

"Neh?" Myungsoo asked.

"Hyung, earlier someone-"

"Jongin stop right there," Suji said, huffing, as she went in the living room.

"-someone confessed to Suji." Jongin finished his sentence with a smirk.

"Yahhh!" Suji yelled as she ran towards Jongin and started pulling his hair. Jongin just laughed as he tried to pry away her arms.

Myungsoo fell silent at Jongin's news. He gave a small but reluctant smile as he finally asked, "So what was your answer Suji?"

The two stopped fighting and looked at Myungsoo. They, then, sat properly and Myungsoo is in between the two.

"I rejected him because I don't know what love he is talking about." Suji said as she layed her head on Myungsoo's shoulder.

Myungsoo grinned. "Someday, you'll know."

 

...

 

It was an afternoon in spring when the three planned to stroll around.

"Hyung, Suji is wearing a dress today." Jongin whispered to Myungsoo as he kicked the leaves under his feet.

Myungsoo nodded and smiled. "So how is it?"

"She looks the same." Jongin said nonchalantly but then, he looked straight and watched as Suji's hair swayed with her floral dress.

His voice turned into a whisper when he added, "Beautiful as ever." 

"I heard that Jongin," Myungsoo said before chuckling.

"Yah! Palli!" Suji said as she waved at the two guys.

 

...

 

"What the hell is your problem?"

"You can't always hug and kiss hyung whenever you want!"

"Why are you so sensitive?! It's just a kiss on the cheek!"

"Going to his room is also forbidden!"

"Says who? What's the big deal about it?! Jongin, it's Myungsoo oppa!"

"Bae Suji! We're not kids anymore!"

"But you know oppa's condition!"

"Are you two fighting?" Myungsoo said as he went inside Jongin's room.

Suji suddenly went behind him. "Oppa, Jongin is a jerk."

"Yah!" Jongin exclaimed but a tear suddenly landed on Suji's cheek.

Jongin's face softened as he saw Suji sob before running away.

"What's the matter Jongin?" Myungsoo asked, still standing at his door.

Silence.

Jongin ruffled his hair in despair before sitting at the edge of his bed, "I think I'm in love hyung."

Silence.

"Won't you say anything hyung?" he asked as he looked at the male.

Myungsoo opened his mouth but found no words to say.

"Of course," Jongin chuckled bitterly.  "It's because you like Suji too."

"Jonginnie," Myungsoo said softly and stepped forward.

 "I'm not blind hyung!" he shouted but then he shut his eyes and said calmly,  "I can see it when you blush everytime Suji kisses your cheek."

"I guess, I was not able to hide it," Myungsoo said as he forced himself to beam but his smile only showed sadness.

"I wish I was you hyung," Jongin uttered as his eyes reddened with tears.

The smile on Myungsoo's face melted and his jaw tightened, "Kim Jongin, that is so insensitive of you."

"But I really do hyung. I wish I can have a lot of love and attention from Suji and mom too." 

 

 ...

 

"Suji-ya, are the two of you still avoiding each other?"

Suji continued flipping through the pages of her book before whispering, "I think so."

"Why? Is it because of the fight?" Myungsoo asked, concerned. "It's normal for friends to fight."

"Ani," she shook her head. "We resolved that already a few weeks ago."

"Then what is it?" Myungsoo asked further.

Silence.

Suji gulped and closed her book. She sighed before whispering, "Oppa, Jongin confessed to me."

Silence.

Myungsoo faked a smile but he could hear his heart beating loudly as he asked, "So what was your answer Suji?"

"I rejected him because I already know what love is."

"Then?"

"And I love him but not in the same way that he loves me."

Myungsoo nodded but he did not know whether to be happy or to be sad.

"Besides, I think I'm in love with someone too," she added as she stared at him.

"Who?"

"You."

Myungsoo did not know how to react. Silence again, engulfed the two until the door opened and Jongin went in. Myungsoo heard him let out a scoff before going upstairs and into his own room. Myungsoo ran his fingers through his hair as he was drowned in confusion and anxiety.

"Suji, can't you see my condition?" he asked.

"I can perfectly see you," Suji said as she cupped his face.  "And you're beautiful just the way you are."

"Suji, it still can not be," Myungsoo shook his head.  "Jongin-"

"Do you love me oppa?" she cut him off with a question. "Do you love me in the same way that I love you?"

Myungsoo breathed heavily. He closed his eyes and nodded, "I do."

Then he felt, Suji's lips, now, not on his cheeks but on his lips.

 

...

 

"Hyung, you told me that friends and siblings should share."

Myungsoo nodded but kept his head low.

"But we can't share Suji," Jongin chuckled bitterly.

"Jongin-"

"Don't worry," he tried to assure him with a cheerful voice. "I can meet a lot of girls hyung, then I'll be happy too."

"I'm sorry Jongin," Myungsoo said as he hugged Jongin.

"It's okay hyung. I will be okay," Jongin said as he tapped Myungsoo's back.

He broke the hug, not wanting to let Myungsoo hear his sob or feel the tears that started flooding on his cheeks.

 

...

 

Myungsoo heard Suji crying and as he slowly walked towards her, he could feel his heart wanting to escape out of his ribs in fear. 

As the tears just kept flowing, Suji can't find the courage to say anything to him. Oblivious, Myungsoo hugged her tight.

"Myungsoo-ya," his mother called him and he could hear how her voice sounded so broken.

Myungsoo tried to approach his mother without shaking, but he felt so weak. His legs almost gave him away.

"Omma, " Myungsoo bit his lips. "Omma, where is Jongin?"

His mother took his hand and assisted him until he was in front of Jongin's body. Myungsoo reached forward and touched his hand.

It was cold and it was not moving.

He tried to touch his arm, desperately searching for his brother's warmth but there was none. His knees collapsed  as tears quickly formed in his eyes. 

"Myungsoo-ya," he heard a voice call his name and he felt her arms encircled around him.

"Suji-ya... " Myungsoo sobbed until his cries became louder. The tears were unstoppable and the pain was beyond suffocating.

Jongin was dead and no matter how much Myungsoo cried, he knew that Jongin would not be able to hear it anymore because he was gone forever.

"I'm sorry Jongin" Myungsoo kept repeating those words as Suji rocked his body.

 

...

 

"Myungsoo-ya, you have to go the operating room as soon as possible," his mom touched his shoulder.

Myungsoo shrugged away her hand and sternly said, "I don't want mom."

"Myungsoo."

"I said, I don't want!" he yelled.

"Myungsoo-ya, Jongin would want you to do this," she pleaded.

Myungsoo broke into tears again. "Omma."

Myungsoo remembered when Suji knocked on his door countless times. 

"Myungsoo-ya, Jongin... Jongin was caught in an accident."

 

...

 

Myungsoo slowly opened his eyes and saw a girl staring at him. He saw the world that Jongin could only narrate to him.

"How is it? Can you see me now?"

As he heard her voice, he knew that it as Suzy. Myungsoo nodded and smiled. 

Jongin's right. You are very beautiful.

But as he remembered his brother, a bitter smile came to his lips. He mumbled, "I guess I can't see Jongin alive after all."

Suji also smiled bitterly before hugging him tight.

"I wonder if I could see from the start, then would I be able to protect Jongin?" he asked.

He could feel warm balls of tears forming on the corner of his eyes as he said, "That day... I asked him to buy a ring for you. If only I could buy it myself."

He bit back a sob as he added, "If only I was not blind....maybe, Jongin would not die... maybe Jongin would be alive today."

Suji just hugged him tighter and prevented herself from crying. She whispered on his ears,

"Gwenchana. Wherever Jongin is now, I know he's happy, because you can finally see the beauty that he once saw."

 

...

 

"Suji. Can I touch him?"

Suji slowly nodded. "Of course, he's your son, after all."

Myungsoo smiled as he carried the baby.

It's warm and it moves. It's alive.

"What would his name be? You can pick it."

Myungsoo smiled. "Jongin."

Suji smiled too and she felt a tear land on her cheek. She looked at Myungsoo who was teary-eyed but had a contented gaze on his eyes.

He kissed the baby's cheeks and whispered, "Welcome to the world Jongin. I promise, I will take good care of you now."