Okay, this is an apology drabble for one of my wonderful readers on my BANG BANG BANGTAN story~

member: SUGA

Heartbreak/ Sad

"Oppa please" you cry softly, truly confused. why is he acting this way?

"DON'T 'Oppa Please' me" SUGA hisses. "where the hell have you been?" he growls, eyes flashing. 

"I was at the hospital!" you blurt out, pausing. "getting a physical" you studder out quickly, eyes wide. he frowns deeply staring at you, anger fading from his chestnut eyes. 

"the hospital?" he stares at you, taking in your appearance. you are paler than usual, your eyes seeming more sunken than usual. reaching up, he winces a when you cringe away. stepping closer he takes your face in his hands, tracing over the shadows taking over your features. 

"baby," he whispers. "you're lying..." he states blandly, lifting your brusised arm to show a plain white bandage wrapped tightly around your arm, hiding purplish puncture wounds from view. 

"what's wrong?" you swallow, tugging away from him weakly. 

"nothing" he groans, tugging you close again, burying his face in your neck whining pleadingly against the sensitive skin there. 

"baby, please. i know you! you've lost so much weight, you havent been sleeping and your havent eaten... im worried" rolling your eyes, you whack his arm lightly. 

"mhm, so you fight me?" he pauses. 

"you havent been coming home... i... i thought something else was going on" 

"you thought wrong" you half snap "how could you ever think that?" he winces, scrubbing the back of his neck weakly, avoiding your eyes. sighing, you take his arm gently, tugging him to the door.

"oppa," you coo. he turns to face you immediatly, his eyes softening. 

"what, love?" smiling weakly, you look towards the door. 

"i... cant explain," you start gingerly. "but the doctor can" he frowns following you out slowly. 

"O-oppa?" you whisper slowly, staring at him unsure. he is just staring forward at the blank white wall in front of him, color drained from his face hands limp in his lap. 

nothing. 

"Oppa" you whimper, shaking his shoulder again. this time he slowly turns to face you, his perfect chocolate eyes watering, dull. 

"why havent you told me?" he asks slowly, his words trembling in the dead air of the room. shifting on the bed, you turn to face him more, tears lining your eyes as well. 

"i only found out while you were on tour..." he pauses. he has been home for a week. you have left everyday for several hours, and it finally makes sense. your stupid alibys that seemed like complete lies. though they were, he never dreamed that it would be because of this. 

"ive been home for a week..." he starts weakly, having to pause so he doesnt break down. "you could have called me, i would have been home in hours." you only laugh a bit bitterly. 

"baby, you have your fans... you needed to stay with them." he frowns, wincing. the past few months, he has been nothing but about his fans, about bangtan... and nothing about you. he always forgets to call, and almost never texts you. though when he does talk to you, he cuts it short so he can spend more time with the fans, again. 

"you have always been my priority..." he tries. you roll your eyes. 

"baby, i understand. dont worry" you whisper. "this is important to you... so it is important to me" he swallows weakly, nodding. 

"You are even more important to me... why didnt you tell me?" he asks desperatly, taking both of your hands in his, staring up into your eyes gently. 

"i... was scared... i was scared that if i told you, if i said it..." you whimper, hugging close to him, tears stinging your eyes again. "that it would be real... it feels like a dream oppa..." he pauses, wrapping his arms around you tightly. he needs to hold you, he needs you in his arms... and he needs you to stay there and never leave them...

his baby is sick...

his baby is fading... 

and what kills him the most...

she is dying, in his arms. 

"how much time?" he asks brokenly, his emotions taking over. she pauses, looking away from him.

"a few months... maybe" he turns her head, kissing her gingerly.

"i will make them the best" you laugh saddly against his lips, tears dripping down your tears. 

"SUGA" you state teasingly, making him smile slowly. "every moment i have with you is, and always has been, the best" he softens, kissing your forehead gingerly. 

"god... i love you"

this is just a short drabble... and i dont feel it is really good, but i am really wanting to get these out to my babies!

i hope you like it sweetie~ (Nisslish)