Like today she left, she left letting only the pain by my side. She didn't mean to, I didn't want to let her go but time was against our well. He took her away and from that time I never saw her again.

===================================================================================================

I bought a bouquet of white lilies because she adored them. I was on my way to her place… I miss her so much. I walked and passed the park I stopped then stared at the bench that was under the cherry tree.

Flashback===

" _______-ah will you go out with me?" I shouted looking down at her feet nervously while she was sitting on the bench. She stood up and walked towards me. I looked up and saw her smiling brightly.

" Hmmm… why not?!! You look cute anyway" She said cupping my face while giggling softly. I smiled and leaned in closer then pressed my lips against her kissing her softly. How could I describe the feeling of her softlips kissing mine? It was just wonderful, yes! Wonderful.

End of flashback===

Tears built up in my eyes but I tried so hard to hold them back. I smiled weakly and continued walking. I reached the bus stop and sat on the bench waiting for it. On my right side was a huge green field…

Flashback===

" Youngsaeng-ah say ahhh… " ______ said holding the chopsticks in front of my mouth.

" Ahhh.." I opened my mouth and took the food inside my mouth. " Yummy" I said and kissed her cheek.

She giggled and kept feeding me.

End of flashback===

I sighed and looked away, I felt my chest got heaveir and I couldn't just forget every moment of her. She's stuck in my head even though a year passed I still see her everywhere and I can't get rid of her, actually I don't want to.

Soon the bus arrived and I stepped in. I sat at the back and looked out of the window.

Flashback===

" I'm sorry… I really am sorry " I apologized but seeing her smile confused me.

" Youngsaeng-ah it's not your fault that your parents didn't except me" She said caressing my cheek as we sat at the back of the bus.

I grabbed her hands and kissed them then looked up at her.

" We'll fight together, You and I… I promise that I'll be by your side no matter what" I said and hugged her tightly while she let her tears ran freely out of her eyes.

" I won't let you go, even if I had to leave my parents I won't leave you… _______-ah Saranghaeyo"

" Youngsaeng-ah nado Saranghaeyo" She said and rested her head on my shoulder smiling warmly.

End of flashback===

A lonely tear slide down my cheek as I couldn’t suppress my feelings any more. I can't be strong without her, I can't move on either, I want her back in my life. I would do anything just to have her again between my arms.

The bus stopped when I reached my destination,I stepped out and walked again up the hill, on my way I passed Seoul hospital the one…

Flashback===

" No dr. Lee please check it out again… there's nothing WRONG WITH HER DO YOU HEAR ME" I shouted.

" Youngsaeng-shi please calm down, she needs you to be there for her" Dr. Lee said pointing at her bed while she was sleeping there peacefully.

" But she was ok minutes ago… it's my fault, she said she wasn't ok but I insisted to take her out" I said feeling guilty.

" No it's not your fault Youngsaeng-shi it's not" Dr. Lee said patting my shoulder then left. I walked in and sat on the edge of the bed. I tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead. She opened her eyes and whispered something I leaned closer to her so I can listen clearly to what she was saying.

" Youngsaeng-ah please if I go away don't be sad… I love it when you smile, so for me smile more and don't shed a tear over me. I will feel guilty if you did. Youngsaeng-ah you know I love you and I'll always will. Don't think I'll leave you here alone I'll be watching you from up there and I'll take care of you… always" And with that she closed her eyes forever. I could see the doctors and nurses were rushing to the room and trying to feel a pulse, a hope for life.

All this was happening in front of me and I was frozen. I felt numb and I couldn't move a muscle. She's gone… she's gone forever? No that can't be NO NO NO..

" NO ________-AH PLEASE WAKE UP DON'T GO PLEASE I NEED YOU _______-AH I LOVE YOU PLEASE LISTEN TO ME _______-AH DON'T GO I BEG YOU " I yelled shaking her very hard. The nurses pushed me away and tried to calm me down but I was like crazy I was pushing them away trying to reach _______.

" LET GO… PLEASE LET ME SEE HER LET ME TALK TO HER PLEASE.. please" I went on my knees crying my heart out.

" Please let me at least say goodbye" I begged the doctor and he looked down at me pathetically. I didn't care how he sees me, all I cared about was to see her for the last time. The doctor nodded and they let me in. I looked at her pale lifeless face. I touched her cheek and it was cold. Tears couldn't seem to stop… I'm sorry I couldn't prevent myself from being sad ______ when the pain fills me to the brim.

I got out of the room and saw her parents crying out there I passed them and went out of the hospital and ran through streets I didn't know why I'm running?!! I didn't know where I'm going?!! After ______ nothing matters to me not even my worthless life.

I knelt down when I felt my legs were killing me. I looked up and found myself in front of her house. I didn't know that I ran all thise distants to be here. I got up and climbed the tree then managed to get inside her room through the window, like I always used to when her parents refuse to let her go out late at night.

I went straight to her bed and lied down I took her pillow and sniffed her scent then I embraced it and cried. I cried the tears of pain, I cried the tears of me and her, I cried the tears of her sudden farewell. I'll miss you ______. You were my life and you'll still be. No one will take your place in my heart. I'll be always yours.

End of flashback===

I finally climbed the hill and reached her grave, the place where she rests in peace. I put the bouquet down and wiped my tears away.

" You said that I shouldn't be sad… and i should smile more, that's why I'm trying not to be sad, but it's hard. ________-ah I miss you so much I miss your smile, I miss smelling your scent, I miss holding you in my arms. why were you the one who had to go?....  Maybe it's better that I'm the one who should endure all this pain and not you.... That's how much I love you Choi ______-ah and I'll always love you with the same passion and I hope will meet again vey soon" I said then smiled.

The End