You know what’s hard,

Having a crush on someone,

Yet, never having enough courage to openly express your feelings towards that said person.

Why?

For fear of being rejected,

Humiliated,

Since that person has the ability to make or break your heart.

In a mere second, his answer can make your heart flutter,

Sending thousands of shock waves through your body,

As a warm feeling engulfs your entire being, sending you into oblivion,

And, as you gaze adoringly at the one who reciprocates your feelings.

A bright genuine smile makes its way onto your face.

And you feel as if nothing can go wrong at this moment.

As if everything fell perfectly into place.

Since you’re finally standing in front of the person who has captured your heart and refused to give it back.

But that same answer,

 Can shatter your heart into millions of pieces,

Leaving you dumbfounded, by that simple word that came out of your loved ones’ lips.

As your vision becomes blurred by the salty tears,

That are threatening to fall at any moment and at any second.

As the sounds of laughter fill the entire hallway,

As your classmates start pointing at you,

Snickering and mocking you,

For being rejected,

And for even thinking, just for a mere moment that you ever stood a chance of being loved by someone like him.

Someone who’s way out of your league,

Someone who’s got everyone in the palm of his hand,

Millions of adoring fan girls swooning over his every step.

And thousands of guys silently jealous of his capability to make those fragile hearts flutter,

Of his good looks that play an important role in the seduction game he openly plays and masters,

Of his overachievements and the immense amount of praises that are spouted his way,

But who also look up to this young man,

Since despite the hatred that burns their insides,

They can’t argue over the fact that his popularity is well deserved.

I bet you’re wondering who that said person is,

Who’s the person that captured Han Soohyuns’ heart?

And refused to give it back,

Who’s the person that makes her heart race a thousand miles per second?

Whenever he smiles,

 Laughs,

Or even talks,

Who’s the person that trapped her in this dangerous game?

 A game that can tear her fragile heart apart,

A game, in which she may not come out as a winner,

Since the rules are all made up by none other than,

Mr. Kim Myungsoo.

Its hard having a one sided love isn’t it?

Well, you can’t exactly call it a one sided love, since you have no idea if the person you’re madly in love with reciprocates your feelings or not.

He may actually like you back.

 Then again, he may not.

So in order to avoid rejection, more likely heartbreak and embarrassment, Han Soohyun refused to let her inner feelings show.

She has been silently crushing over a boy for the past two years.

And she was satisfied by being unnoticed.

 She saw her crush every day for the past two years.

And she was content by merely seeing him.

Seeing his smile, that would always make her heartbeat increase in mere moments.

Seconds even.

Hearing his laugh,

That sweet melody that fills her ears, as he jokes around with his friends.

Completely unaware of her stares,

Her gaze that only lingers on him,

On the man that had her in the palm of his hand.

On the man that possesses her heart.

Her entire being,

What can I say; she only had eyes for Kim Myungsoo.

Even though, he was clearly unaware of her presence.

More likely, unaware of her existence,

“Why can’t you just tell him how you feel”, her best friend nagged her for the-well she stopped counting after the number had hit twenty. 

“You do realize that we’re graduating in two weeks, don’t you think you should at least tell him, before it’s too late?”

Soohyun sighed, she knew she was right.

 She should openly tell him how she feels.

But, she couldn’t.

She wouldn’t.

Why?

She was afraid.

Of what?

Of being rejected of course,

Of having her heart broken,

Shattering into millions of pieces, leaving a deep scar within her,

Within her soul, her entire being,

Sure that scar would heal in due time,

But its trace would always linger on her flesh,

On her mind,

Burning her insides,

It’ll always be there to remind her of her fail attempt at love,

Of the first heartbreak she ever encountered in her life,

But, it’ll also be a sign of strength,

Since she had enough courage to openly express her feelings towards the person who seized her heart,

Her entire being,

She was brave enough to confess her feelings towards her loved one,

And to no longer stand in the shadows of that said person,

Loving him and admiring him from afar,

But sadly,

That strength she so longed for,

That courage she was desperately seeking,

Never made its way towards her,

So she decided to stand in the shadows,

Where her rightful place stood,

Where she belonged,

And was content by admiring her loved one from far away,

And wasn’t entirely ready to express her inner feelings towards him,

Even if she was, the chances of her being accepted by someone like him were really slim,

Since she was a nobody,

A loser,

No one cared for her,

Heck, no one even knew she existed,

And she liked it that way,

She wanted it to remain that way,

Since she never quite liked being the center of attention,

Being noticed by all of her classmates,

Having people gawking at her every second of the day,

Their eyes burning deep holes on her pale skin,

As they talk about her,

Constantly judging her,

Being noticed clearly wasn’t her cup of tea.

She liked being invisible to the eye,

She liked being herself,

And not once did she try to fit in,

To be like the rest,

Since she would rather having people hating her for who she is,

Than loving her for whom she’s not.

She wasn’t that pretty either,

She was,

What you call,

Normal,

A normal eighteen year old girl.

But he,

He was different,

The complete opposite,

He was outgoing,

While she preferred to be locked up in her shell,

He was admired by many,

While she wasn’t even noticed by anyone at all,

Had tons of friends,

While she only had one,

A true friend at that,

Extremely athletic, he’s the captain of the basket ball team for crying out loud,

While she couldn’t even run to save her life,

Weak stamina, might I add.

He was very bright, passing with flying colors,

While she barely maintained her average score,

He could date whoever he wanted,

Since any girl would kill to be his girlfriend,

So why would he even give her the time of day,

He was way out of her league,

And she clearly knew that,

That’s why she didn’t,

Couldn’t get herself to express her feelings towards him,

Because she obviously knew she’ll be rejected,

Simple as that,

He always received confessions from girls on a daily basis,

She would only be a mere name in the sea of the thousands of confessions that came his way,

An