They were practically at their wits end.

She was having nightmares again.

As soon as their second Japan tour started she was certain that they had stopped. After all, on stage she was in her true element. She wasn’t as scared as the first time they were here, hell, the stage in Japan was like a second home at this point.

The crowd screaming their name, their fans screaming their name, it supplied her with the energy she needed to go on. The endless noise, the pink lights, it just filled her up with an immense feeling that made all of her muscle aches go away.

And she was happy, they were all happy. Touring was the final plateau of their hard work. The way they controlled the stage and felt like they were on top of the world, that was the ultimate sensation, the perfect and glamorous result to their tremendous efforts.

The girls were eating better too. She watched eagerly as her members gained back the weight lost during their comeback promotions. And she smiled, she smiled so much that her face hurt when she and her members drank until sunrise because they had a day off. It felt good, elating even to be filled so much to the point where they could barely move.

So why? Why on earth was she still having nightmares?

Sooyoung pondered thoroughly as she sat cross legged in their temporary living room. She was on the floor, hand on her chin and eye brow threatening to break into her eye as it couldn’t have possibly lowered any further. She was stumped, they were all stumped. Her fellow members joined her in looking clueless and helpless in the plunging darkness of the night.

It was 4AM and their leader was rolling around in her bed, shaking and making grunting sounds. Every once in a while she would introduce their group, sometimes she would sing their lyrics, but in the end it would turn into violent shaking and crying.

The rest of the girls were surrounding Sooyoung, their faces making the same puzzled expression. Tiffany had her face in her hands, she felt like crying at this point.

“Do you think she’s okay?” she asked everyone, breaking the tension filled silence of the room.

It wasn’t the first time they all couldn’t sleep, worried about their tossing and turning leader. No one could even wake the girl up until the next morning, when they were supposed to wake up. And by that time Taeyeon was shaken, sweating and eyes red despite a full night’s rest.

“Unnie seemed okay on stage today,” Yoona spoke up, her index finger not leaving as she chewed on her nail nervously.

Yuri was leaning on Yoona, her arms wrapped around her neck and her head not staying still as she also brainstormed with the rest of the group.

“She always seems fine throughout the day,” Hyoyeon said this time, her hands resting firmly on her swaying hips. No one had the patience to sit still.

“Should we all take turns putting unnie to ease like usual?” Seohyun offered, the first one to get up and approach her room.

“We should try to stop them altogether instead of having to wake up and calming her down ourselves,” Sunny commented, her eyes ready to cry as she heard another scream from Taeyeon in the other room. Her stomach churned with each sound Taeyeon made and she wanted so badly to run to her side and hold her forever.

Jessica nodded, her hands covering her ears in an attempt to drown out their leader’s pained cries. “Maybe we should each take turns sleeping with her? One of us always ends up doing that anyway.”

Sooyoung shook her head, “No, Taeng would never allow that. She knows how it disturbs us and she would probably already hate herself for keeping us up at this hour.” She stretched, trying her best to take the tension off her own back.

“I’m scared for her,” Tiffany mumbled, her head turning to the direction of Taeyeon’s bedroom. “What could she possibly be having nightmares about?”

The group shrugged. Taeyeon’s developed depression was evident even when they were supposed to be enjoying themselves. Even when they had breaks to themselves and didn’t have to wake up at ungodly hours to prepare for a broadcast. And they knew she couldn’t control it, and they knew it wasn’t her fault. But every time they brought it up or asked if she was okay, they knew she’d blame herself even more.

“She can tell when one of us sleeps with her too,” Yoona added, crossing her arms over her chest, “And then she gets mad and looks guilty every time that person shows any sign of tiredness.”

“I wish unnie wouldn’t be so hard on herself,” Seohyun sighed, her hand being taken by Hyoyeon. Her roommate took her in an embrace and swayed her. “She knows we’re all here for her, right?”

“Of course,” Sunny replied, rubbing the back of her neck. “But she wants to be the one here for us, not the other way around.”

Their conversation went on in circles and the girls began to feel the hour of the night with each sentence. However, in the midst of their talking, the sounds from Taeyeon’s room stopped.

Tiffany was the first to notice as she got up, “Is she awake?” she wondered out loud.

She turned to face the rest of the group and noticed one of them was missing. She groaned inwardly, wishing she was the first person to make a move.

Sooyoung managed to escape the circle of concerned Taeyeon friends despite being the centre of them. She was tired of talking about it and wanted so badly to make their leader sleep in peace. She knew it was hard, considering how much the girl thrashed when she started to have a bad dream. But there was one thing she had that was an advantage to when the other girls held Taeyeon.

She hasn’t stayed and watched when the other girls slept with Taeyeon, but she was certain, absolutely certain that she was the only one who got Taeyeon to smile in her sleep. The rest of the girls never mentioned it, and Sooyoung thought it was the cutest thing.

Sooyoung opened the door slowly, peering in to see Taeyeon shaking with her sheets and pillows thrown to the floor. She wondered if the other girls would be mad at her for making the first move. She knew Tiffany would have a passive aggressive then outwardly whiny fit over it the next morning, but that didn’t matter right now. She then wondered why she didn’t just hold the girl the first time she heard her wail.

Approaching carefully, Sooyoung got into Taeyeon’s bed and pulled the small girl close to her. Her clothes felt damp and Sooyoung watched carefully as the sweat drenched clothes clung onto her pale skin. She used the back of her hand to wipe the sweat off the leader’s brow and leaned down to kiss the crown of her head.

Taeyeon continued to shake, but the vibrations died down slowly yet surely as the tall girl rocked her and kept her locked in her embrace. Sooyoung turned the smaller girl over and placed her arms around her own waist before clutching her so close that she could smell the sweat and tears that covered her body.

She heard a noise and looked up to meet the gaze of the rest of the girls as they stood at the door, admiring the scene before them. Sooyoung nodded at them and mouthed a goodnight. It was about time that the other girls had their rest too.

“I don’t care how much you’ll object to this in the morning,” Sooyoung whispered to the shivering girl in her arms. “I don’t care if you get so mad that you don’t talk to me. I don’t care if you kick me out of your room and force me to go to bed in my room. I will come back and I will hold you and I will make sure you have the peaceful sleep you so very much deserve.”

She kissed the top of the girl’s head again and rubbed her back, not caring that her own pajamas were getting more and more wet by the second. All that mattered was that the precious girl in her arms hadn’t made a noise other than soft snores since she first held her close.

“You know we all love you, right Taengoo?” she started again as she carefully lied down with the now still Taeyeon. The other girl responded by nuzzling her head into Sooyoung’s chest, her tear stained cheeks drying up against the folds of her shirt. “Especially me. And we’re here to protect you from whatever monsters are haunting you at night. So let me sleep with you, okay? From tonight and now on until you don’t need me anymore.”

She watched as Taeyeon’s face went from its constant contorting to a more relaxed, peaceful expression. Her heart fluttered as soon as the older girl in her arms' lips formed a small smile and snuggled closer to her.

Sooyoung was satisfied with her decision and figured that the wrath of Tiffany and Taeyeon in the morning would be worth the night sleeping with their beloved leader.

It was definitely worth the smile that graced her beautiful face. And the drool that was now pooling at her chest. And the legs that were now wrapping around hers.

As her slender fingers traced circles into the small of Taeyeon’s back, she closed her eyes and whispered into the early morning.

“Sleep well.”