Rain Sound

 

It had been raining for the past couple of days. Ominous grey clouds hung over the bustling city of Seoul. Lightning struck over a conglomerate business tower, thunder rumbling soon after. From his apartment, Baekhyun stared out into the dreary afternoon, watching the pedestrians down below walk to their destinations, looking like an army of sharply dressed ants.

 

He had places to go, errands to run. But still Baekhyun stood in front of the glass windows with a far away look in his eyes, a nostalgic smile tugging at his lips because storms like these had a special spot in his heart. Truthfully, he was waiting for that phone call as well. But his phone lay silent on the couch; no missed calls, no text messages.

 

Baekhyun had met Kyungsoo on a stormy afternoon like, both soaked to the bone outside of their first-grade class room. Kyungsoo's parents had forgotten to pick him up again. And on a day with a scheduled storm rolling in, of all days. Baekhyun had choir classes after school, and when he saw his classmate, whom he never had the courage to approach, a weird feeling throbbed in his chest. Pity; his mother taught him that when he ran home after school that day and told her all about it.

 

Little Kyungsoo sniffled and shuffled his feet. Tears brimmed on his eyes. He huddled against the wall for warmth and jumped at the clap of thunder.

 

"Hey!"

 

Whipping his head around, the brunette saw a boy about his age stumbling towards him. Strangers always made Kyungsoo nervous so he shied away from  him, flinching when the wind picked up.

 

"Hey," the boy panted when he was In front of his classmate."Kyungsoo, right?"

 

"Y-yeah...Who are you?" But really Kyungsoo knew whom this Boy was; he was the one that always got in trouble for singing at inappropriate times during class. Kyungsoo really liked his voice.

 

"I'm Baekhyun!" He smiled proudly before furrowing his eyebrows. "What are you doing out here in the rain all alone?"

 

Shame tinged Kyungsoo's cheeks pink. "I-I just enjoy the rain."

 

Baekhyun's mother taught him it was impolite to pry, so he just nodded. Just then, the wind shifted and the rain picked up. They both flinched at the crack of thunder, though they missed the lightening. Suddenly Baekhyun grabbed Kyungsoo's tiny, cold hand. "Come on, I know somewhere nice and warm!"

 

When the boys stepped into the spacious choir room, Kyungsoo gapped. "Wow...How do you know about this place? I thought this was just for grown ups."

 

"It is," said Baekhyun, swinging his feet as he sat down in an aisle. "But my teacher says I have the singing voice of an adult so I'm aloud in here." 

 

"You're a singer?"

 

The taller of the two grinned,. "I want to be a professional singer when I grow up!" Baekhyun paused when he heard Kyungsoo humming a melodious tune. "Wanna sing a song in the big kid mics?"

 

Kyungsoo looked embarrassed when he replied, "I-I'm not a very good singer."

 

"That's okay!" Baekhyun shoved a microphone into his new friend's smaller hands. "Just sing. Don't worry, I'll help you."

 

And that's where their friendship began. Kyungsoo soon joined the choir because of Baekhyun's persistence. They continued to grow closer and closer through the years. But when their twenties rolled in, everything changed.

 

Kim Jongin was the walking epitome of bad decisions. Cigarette smoke perpetually cloaked him and bags bruised under his eyes from days without sleep. How he and Kyungsoo met each other was never specified; it had something to do with dancing. But Baekhyun knew from the start this boy was no good, and his best friend was making a colossal mistake. The couple was oh-so in love. Jongin never missed the chance to wrap his arms around Kyungsoo's waist and send taunting smirks to Baekhyun on the sly. 

 

You see, Baekhyun had come to terms with the fact that he was head over heels for his best friend of seventeen years. Yet he never had the courage to tell Kyungsoo that. Maybe it's because he didn't want to ruin their friendship. Or maybe it was because he felt he wasn't good enough for Kyungsoo. Now Baekhyun knew damn well he was a prince compared to the slovenly Jongin.

 

Baekhyun could distinctly remember the confrontation he and Jongin had gotten into after Kyungsoo's twenty-first birthday party.

 

What had happened was everyone drank until they couldn't remember what day it was. While most of them were happy drunks, there was Jongin. He had gotten belligerent and hung off of Kyungsoo like a leach, putting a damper on the mood. Because he had planned this party for his best friend and was extremely infuriated with Jongin's behavior, Baekhyun pulled the dancer aside to speak with him in private. 

 

Now, he tried to be as polite as possible, but things did not turn out as planned. Albeit, Baekhyun himself had one too many shots, yet he was sober enough to act like a decent human being, whereas Jongin lost sight of that after a bottle of tequila. One thing lead to another and bam, Baekhyun had a busted lip and a bruised cheek and had to be physically restrained by a tipsy Chanyeol because he was frothing at the mouth in anger and hate. Jongin got the worst end of it with a black eye and a blow to the nose that knocked him on his rear, disoriented. Much to the brunette's chagrin, Kyungsoo spoke only a handful of words to him for about two weeks after the fight because he sided with Jongin instead of his life long friend.

 

It really broke Baekhyun's heart to know he was the second choice now. So rather than trying to fix things Baekhyun also kept his distance and even refrained from calling him.

 

During their separation of some sorts, Baekhyun met Kris. A Chinese artist whom was in Seoul for an expo with looks even a model would envy. They met through Chanyeol, and though Baekhyun was skeptical, Kris was taken with him and insisted he be his tour guide for the time he was there.

 

Months went by without a word from Kyungsoo and Baekhyun continued to see Kris, traveling back and forth from Seoul to Guangzhou. Despite this, his artificial happiness with Kris, there was an ache in Baekhyun's heart where Kyungsoo's love once was.

 

Maybe it was after 4 months of dating, 8 months of being a couple, almost two years gone without talking to Kyungsoo, after Kris proposal in front of all of his friends, that Baekhyun realized this is not what he wanted. Kris was not whom he craved, breathed, lived for. And Kyungsoo must have realized this as well, because in that fateful night, where the rain was relentless, when he showed up soaking wet in  Baekhyun's - or actually, Kris's- front porch, looking broken.

 

Breathing was not possible for Baekhyun to do at that moment. This had to be another one of his dreams he had frequently. But it was not; his long-lost friend stared up him with a sad smile, eyes red from crying, shivering.

 

"Kyung..." Baekhyun breathed, taking shaking steps back to let the petite male in. "Kyungsoo...I-"

 

"So it is true." Kyungsoo grasped Baskhyun's hand in his. They both jumped at the familiar sensation. He bit his lip, face expressionless. "You're engaged."

 

"Yes." It sounded more like a question than a statement. Baekhyun wanted to say something along the lines of 'give me the word and i'll break this shamble of an engagement off'. But he opted for intertwining his fingers with Kyungsoo's, baskin in the silence for a moment.

 

"You must be furious with me. I was childish to have ignored you like that." He his thumb along the back Baekhyun's. Tears pooled in his ebony orbs. "I...I was just so conflicted. Having to choose between you and Jongin- I couldn't do it. So I ran. But Jongin followed." He connected gazes with the elder. "I was never on his side, nor on yours. I was neutral, but he made it seem like I chose him."

 

"Why didn't you say anything then?" Finally, an intelligent reply. 

 

Kyungsoo smiled slightly. "You seemed so mad at me, I was scared. And then you found Kris...I thought I was replaced."

 

   "No, you were never replaced Kyungsoo." Baekhyun moved to grip Kyungsoo's wrist. "Your spot is reserved only for you."

 

Kyungsoo shook under his faze, looking fragile and ready to break down into tears. "Baekhyun I-I can't take it anymore."

 

"What? What can't you take?"

 

"This!" He flinched, tearing himself away. "I've lied to myself for years now about my feelings for you. But now-seeing you engaged- it's unbearable. I-"

 

A soft, fiercely desperate pair of lips cut him off. Baekhyun pulled Kyungsoo closer to him. All space between them was nonexistent. Kyungsoo practically melted into the kiss, clinging desperately to Baskhyun by wrapping his arms around his neck. 

 

Teeth clashed against teeth. Hair was pulled. Someone how they had ended up in the living room, nearly on the floor with an exception of boxers. Kyungsoo stopped Baekhyun before he could pull his underwear down.

 

"Stop," he panted.

 

Baekhyun growled. "Why? What's wrong?"

 

"You're engaged, that's what's wrong!"

 

Suddenly, Baekhyun grasps Kyungsoo's flushed face in his hands, staring intently in his eyes. "Tell me to break it off."

 

"W-what?" Kyungsoo sniffed, trying to pull away. "Don't be an idio-"

 

"Tell me to break it off, Kyungsoo, because I love you. I love you, and I've loved you for years now. Kris is nothing, you're my everything." He breathed, resting his forehead in the other's. "Tell me to break off my meaningless engagement."

 

Rather than making that request, Kyungsoo opted for whispering, " me; I want you to me."

 

He never said those four words. They never said the three words that burned both of heir tongues.

 

A clap of thunder startled Baekhyun, jostling him from his flashback. The storm seemed to be getting worse, with heavier rain and lightning. The clock on the far wall read a quarter past five in the evening; Kris will be home in an hour. He had been staring out the window for at least two hours. And in those two hours, his phone never rang like he hoped it would.

 

Baekhyun sighed, which seemed like an inherent tick now. Maybe this was for the better. They could both move on with their lives, no matter how painful it would be. Baekhyun had Kris now, and Kyungsoo had Jongin. Maybe the clouds in Baekhyun's heart will disperse now. 

 

The clock's larger hand passed five-thirty. Reaching into his pocket, the brunette pulled out two slips of paper. And he ripped them both in half impassively. Bits and pieces, if put together, would read out "From Seoul, South Korea to New York, United States"; plane tickets. He tossed them into the fireplace. The phone still didn't ring. The rain was still relentless. Kris was still his fiancée. The phone still didn't ring.

Thus, Baekhyun painted on that artificial smile of his and closed the blinds.

 

The storm outside couldn't begin to compare to the one in Baekhyun's heart.