But I Love You

Chapter Eleven

Seung Hyun was busy typing up a report that he had to get done in purpose to the company and his recent jobs, when he noticed that Siwon started to rouse from sleep. He was in Siwon’s house, seeing as the night before, Siwon had begged him to stay with him, just because he was feeling lonely. That was the reason why Seung Hyunn was sitting in that large couch, legs crossed, laptop set on his lap, and Siwon asleep on the other end, curled into himself. It wasn’t long that Siwon sat up and looked around himself several times before he dashed out of the living room and towards his bedroom- almost looking as if something was chasing him or maybe something was urging him to act like that. Seung Hyun wondered what had made his cousin rush off but instead continued to work on his report, seeing as it was still early he had time before he had to go to work.

While Seung Hyun was working, Siwon got into the shower and bathed in record time. He then dressed, and headed to the kitchen. There he prepared two cereal bowls and headed back into the living room, handing one to Seung Hyun whom seemed just about finished writing whatever it was that he was working on.

Seung Hyun accepted the cereal bowl gladly and set the laptop to the side as he did so. Siwon glanced at it, and then dug into his own cereal. “You can take the laptop with you if you want. I don’t got any flash drives to save it for you right now.” He yawned, “and I still have to take you to work,” he added. Seung Hyun shrugged his shoulders.

“Alright,” he muttered.

Siwon frowned, “Did you even sleep last night?” he asked. Seung Hyun shook his head. His kitty ears flicked down, and his tail swirled to the side, before snapping into a more curled position.

“No” he chewed, his eyes trained on the milk of his cereal, “too much thinking to be done. Couldn’t sleep,” he said. Siwon sighed.

“I didn’t say what I said to scare you. Just be more careful around Ji Yong,” Siwon said.

“But what if I do end up hurting him?” Seung Hyun asked.

“You’ll be just fine. I know that you won’t hurt him,” Siwon smiled and got to his feet, drinking the last of the milk of his cereal. “Now hurry your up,”

Seung Hyun finished off his cereal and placed on his shoes. He was a bit tired, he must admit, but he was not sure what to do. Getting packed up and finishing his cereal, he followed Siwon outside and into his Jeep. In a matter of time, Siwon dropped Seung Hyun off to work and then headed to do what he was already planning to do since last night. Seung Hyun had noticed that his cousin was acting a little weird, but he had not said anything about it.

Siwon left, getting his cell phone out as he started to drive once again. He was dialing Hee Chul’s phone number, but no matter how much he tried, he was still not getting a response. Becoming annoyed with it, he finally gave up and just drove, recklessly until he got to Hee Chul’s house. He jumped out of his jeep as soon as he was there and walked towards the house. He knocked the door. No one answered at first. He knocked again.

“I was-”

A boy that Siwon could not remember seeing answered the door. He gapped at him, before he scowled and sent him a slight glare and confused look.

“And you are?”

“None of your business,” he retorted, feeling a bad vibe out of this boy. “I’m looking for Hee Chul, is he here?”

The boy narrowed his eyes, before nodding his head. He seemed to almost evaluate Siwon before giving a proper answer, “He’s here, wait. I’ll call him out,” he then closed the door and went back inside. Siwon could hear him scream out Hee Chul’s name and telling him that there was someone at the door for him. A few minutes later, Hee Chul stepped out, messy haired and wearing his sleeping clothing still.

It was only natural as it was still only seven in the morning.

“Hey there,” he flirtatiously said.

Hee Chul just stared at him shocked. “What are you doing here?”

“Well let’s see, I don’t know, maybe because you’ve been ignoring my calls, and my texts and everything!” Siwon snapped, glaring at Hee Chul who glared at him equally.

“It never bothered you before.” Hee Chul muttered, stepping out and closing the door behind him. Obviously he was not going to invite Siwon inside.

“Who was that guy?” Siwon asked, taking a step back and feeling the cold that was coming from Hee Chul.

“Who…Hyun Seung?” Hee Chul asked, and then shrugged, “My roommate,” he said.

Siwon nodded his head. He shouldn’t have asked. “Look, I’m sorry if me suddenly asking you out sounded weird and you are probably confused about it. But I meant it in all honesty,” Siwon said, looking at Hee Chul with a look that he had learned from Seung Hyun. Hee Chul’s glare softened and Siwon knew he was working his magic now.

“I don’t mind that you asked me out. God, I was so happy that you did…but,” Hee Chul frowned, “I just feel like right now its not the best of times for you to be asking me out,” Hee Chul kept his gaze down. Why were things going this way? He wanted to so badly say yes, but that was not the plan. He was not supposed to even feel anything for anyone that he had been sent here to be friends with. He wasn’t supposed to feel anything.

And yet, he still did.

It was too dangerous now. Back then, if Siwon would have accepted him, it would have been for all the wrong reasons. Now, it was even worst. It was all the wrong reasons and feelings thrown in the mix, that didn’t bowl over correctly in his mind anymore.

Not only that, but he was failing in his mission. Things were getting bad and he had to report things that he didn’t feel right about reporting.

“Then when would be the best time?” Siwon asked. “I’m sorry, I know that it must have hurt when I turned you down and now here I am, making you feel like crap for turning me down. You had every right to do so, but like I said before, your friendship is not something that I can ever give up,” Siwon’s eyes shone with trust and devotion to Hee Chul. Hee Chul felt his heart squeeze painfully.

Oh God, he felt even more terrible than ever before.

Closing his eyes and swallowing hard, he shrugged his shoulder. “I have my own reasons really,” he looked around himself. “Siwon, there are things about me that you don’t know, and I could have never tell you. In fact, talking to you here isn’t safe,” Hee Chul softly whispered and looked around him. He then reached around Siwon, and shoved his hand in his pocket, grabbing the cell phone. Siwon gasped, and stared at him with wide eyes. Hee Chul’s fingers worked over the phone, and then he shoved into Siwon’s chest. “Go away,” he angrily said.

He turned to open the door and harshly closed it behind him.

Siwon stared dumbly for a moment, before he looked at his cell phone. There was an address written in his notes, and a short message that asked him to meet Hee Chul there in a few hours. Siwon was not sure if it was for real or not, but he trusted Hee Chul enough.

So he went on time, to the place that Hee Chul had asked him to, even if he had never heard of the place. His GPS made quick work of fidning the location. 

When he got there, an old abandoned factory, Hee Chul was already there waiting for him. The high noon was hot and Siwon would rather be somewhere with air conditioning, but for the sake of his friendship with Hee Chul he it up. Hee Chul had never looked so small before. Even with the sun light sorrounding him, looking so much like a halo- Hee Chul was really beautiful. An angel perhaps- inhuman maybe- Siwon had always thought that he was. When he approached him, he did it with such caution that Hee Chul smiled at him amusedly, but Siwon couldn’t return the smile.

“Why did you ask me to come here?” he asked.

“So we could talk in private, about something that I think is long overdue,” Hee Chul said, getting to his feet as he did so. He dusted off his . Sitting in one of those dusty chairs was probably not the best of ideas, but it didn’t matter right now.  

Siwon gave him a confused look. “We know everything there is to know about each other, what could we have to talk about so privately?”

“You don’t know everything about me Siwon, there is one thing that you don’t know about me and don’t try to act mad, because there is something that you as well have been hiding from me, for obvious reasons,” Hee Chul snapped, and Siwon frowned. Hee Chul smirked and then shrugged his shoulders.  “I know about Seung Hyun.”

“What…” Siwon’s eyes were now wide.

“I’ve always known about Seung Hyun,” Hee Chul said, “I was after all, born- no, that’s not the correct word, I was created to track him down,” Hee Chul pursed his lips while Siwon felt panicked now. No one was supposed to know about Seung Hyun. And now he feared even more that his little cousin could be in more trouble than thought.

“How! How is it that you think you know anything about Seung Hyun, what do you think that you know about him?” Siwon demanded, moving fast to grasp Hee Chul around the collar of his shirt. His grip was threatening, and his glare promised that he would protect Seung Hyun at all costs.

“Relax, there is nothing that you can do to stop me, by yourself,” Hee Chul’s smirk never faltered. “Didn’t you just hear what I said? I was created, in all aspects of the word, I am a human mixed with machine like qualities. I was created to keep track of Seung Hyun’s progress. It was easier to find him once he started to gain his cat traits, but I was supposed to get to him earlier. I was supposed to get close to him enough that I can figure out how to further alter his DNA, my father after all, was always very interested in the splicing of human and animals. Your baby cousin is nothing but a test, really, the first of many to come”

Siwon let go of Hee Chul, unable to believe what he was hearing. “How did you know about Seung Hyun’s cat traits?” he asked. “That was kept tightly under wraps, no one knows!”

“Oh I know,” Hee Chul said, and then sighed, “but I was able to see it. After a while, his bone structure started to change. See, I came here in hopes to scout out anyone that might have escaped the lab. Dad always knew that there were many that were infected. He had plot it for it to be so,” Hee Chul shrugged his shoulders, “So, I scanned everyone’s bone structures, my eyes are like X-ray’s I could see any skeleton I wanted, and then Seung Hyun’s changed from when I first saw him.”

“But before that, you didn’t have a clue,”

“None at all, and I would have almost missed it.”

“Are your room mates that same as you?” Siwon demanded. He was so confused now. Hee Chul had practically been his childhood friend. They had grown up together. They shared so many things together. And now he was learning that Hee Chul was perhaps not whom he thought that he was. This couldn’t be his best friend. And that was not even the worst of it. The worst part was that he was here for Seung Hyun.

“Also, I can tell you that Seung Hyun has nearly reached an age where he will be ready to mate soon.” Hee Chul scoffed. He wanted to tell Siwon that he knew that Ji Yong was also a neko, but he didn’t want to give the plot away. He was having too much fun watching the two of them interact with each other. It was almost like exploring a new species in the wild. That is why his superiors had not asked him to interfere no more than he already had. They all wanted to know if Seung Hyun and Ji Yong were able to mate with each other and on top of that reproduce. That had been their main goal from the beginning. They had plotted for a more controlled environment, but what was more controlled than letting both Neko’s take their time, explore, and show their habits and see if there were any produced results before there was any real interference. Seung Hyun and Ji Yong were their starting foundations. Their successful offspring would be the ones that they were really after.   “Maybe that is why he has started dating.” Hee Chul finished as an afterthought.

Siwon did not know whether to be angry or something- whatever was proper in this situation! This was Hee Chul after all. Someone he cared about deeply and to learn these things about him. It felt like his heart was tearing apart. “Stay away from Seung Hyun,” he said in a deadly tone, “Stay away from my baby cousin and keep your sick thoughts to yourself!”

Hee Chul dropped any pretence, along with his smirk. “They are not my thoughts. I was created to take on whatever task my owner asked of me and this is what he wanted….but…” Hee Chul himself looked torn now, “I fell in love with you so deeply Siwon, right now, everything hurts so much that I can’t believe it. I’ve always, always been able to get away with being heartless, cold, and uncaring, but suddenly meeting you, it was like a switch was flipped.” Hee Chul shook his head, “you have no idea how dangerous it is to care, I get checked on every single year, and I have to keep myself running as if nothing has changed. So at first, yes I was hurt that you had turned me down, but that helped me realized that my feelings were more genuine that I had first thought. Then I was relieved. At least I thought, that way I couldn’t hurt you or Seung Hyun,”

“Hee Chul, I can forgive you for the little things that you have said. Your creation and the fact that you kept that a secret. There was reason to do so much like there is a reason to protect and keep my cousin’s cat qualities a secret.  But when you intend harm on him that is where I draw the line,” Siwon bared his teeth, his anguish clear in his voice as he said, “There is no way that I would ever let you hurt Seung Hyun, and there is no ing way that you are coming near him. There is no one more precious to me than him, and I just can’t allow that.”

 “I know, you told me so a long time ago. That little kitten really had already coiled himself around your heart the moment that he was born,” Hee Chul wryly smiled. “I know that. That is why I said no. And I shouldn’t be telling you this either. It could mean trouble for the both of us, but in a way, I couldn’t help but to think that this was fair” Hee Chull walked past Siwon. Siwon didn’t let him get far. He reached his hand for Hee Chul’s and kept him in place. His hand, slightly smaller, fit in his larger one and Siwon had a hard time swallowing everything that he had been told- he was choking on the information and at the same time, ironically enough his heart was breaking.

Wow- this was the Icing on the cake.

“It’s not fair if you don’t tell me exactly what we are dealing with here? Who is your owner and what are your roommates?” he asked. He could remembered the disgusted look on the boy that was surely named Hyun Seung. Hee Chul closed his eyes briefly, savoring the feel of Siwon’s hand in his before he snatched it back.

It didn’t matter.

If things kept going the same way and he kept sacrificing his heart enough- maybe tomorrow he wouldn’t be able to feel anymore. The world would go numb and things would get a lot easier. “You’re right. I’ll have to tell you, but remember, I am still the bad guy. I can’t tell you all my secrets,” even to the end, his voice was friendly and teasing. “My roommates, Hyun Seung, and Daesung are spliced, and born with dog genes, much like Seung Hyun was born as a cat. They are fraternal twins, but only Daesung is special. There is something in him that was added and has started to develop. That is as much as I can said, besides giving my own position as their owner, and considered older brother.” Hee Chul started to walk away again.

Siwon stood for a moment. What else could Hee Chul be hiding. God, this was bothering him so much. He ran towards Hee Chul once more, just short of stopping him from getting into his cherry red mustang.

“Why Hee Chul?” he asked.

Hee Chul froze, and then smiled, “Siwon, our friendship is probably the best thing I had ever received in my life, I had not even realized when it became my biggest fear as well. I was always so scared to lose it but now there is no doubt. I’ve lost it haven’t I?”

Siwon nodded his head, “You’ve lost your sanity as well, Damn” He cursed, and looked away. He wanted to punch Hee Chul as much as he wanted to hug him tightly and not let him go. But he let go. Hee Chul looked at him one more time and opened the door of his car.

“You know, there are some things that I can’t control. I…I could easily be killed and disposed of within the next twenty four hours if anyone is to find out that I have confide so many things about this with you,” Hee Chul swallowed, “But there is one thing that I want you to know, and that is that I love you and I also love Seung Hyun. I think I loved you both the very moment that I met you both. I could already say that you were like brothers to me, something that I have never had in my life- the bond between the two of you was not something to envy but something to fall in love with. And I did, that is why I decided to say something- mostly- for Seung Hyun’s sake. Because if it’s not me that gets to him, then it will be someone else, and when they get near, you have to be ready to protect him,” Hee Chul got into his car and started the ignition.

Siwon cursed, but kept him from closing the door. “Who else could possibly come for them?” he demanded.

Hee Chul seemed to hesitate, before he said, “Seon Woong, my father.”

“What…what does he…” Siwon recognized that name over a conversation he had happened to overhear when his uncle and aunt had allowed him to sleep over. But that had been years ago when he had been very young and he had not really understood what they were talking about.

“The perfect species, Siwon, he’s looking for what he calls the perfect species.”

“Is that all?” Siwon asked.

Hee Chul nodded his head.

“And he’s looking for the perfect species through cat infused humans?” he asked, frowning and glaring. “It’s not like there is another one out there to…” his eyes widened.  There had to be another neko…or maybe several others out there, set out so when Seung hyun was ready to start mating one of them would meet.

“Oops, I said too much,” Hee Chul reprimanded himself, and then reached for the car door. He stuck out his tongue to Siwon as he closed the door. Then he looked out through the rolled down window, with a grin on his face, “It was nice being able to talk to you again, Siwon, even if the topic was not pleasant. Even if this might be the last time.”

“And how will I know if you got yourself in trouble and got killed,” Siwon couldn’t help but to ask. He l oved Hee Chul, he knew that much, but he himself was still confused as to how much that was. As far as he knew, Hee Chul owned part of his heart. That much was clear. That is what made all of this so difficult.

Hee Chul was silent for a few seconds, before he said, “You will know,” in a very far away whisper, and he pulled away. Siwon wanted to stop him. There were several things that he still had to ask, but at the same time he wasn’t sure what to ask. He wasn’t sure how long he stood there, simply thinking about everything that had been said. At the end tough, there was only one thing that came to mind and that was the fact that he had to protect Seung Hyun at all costs. And he now had to make sure that no one weird came into Seung Hyun’s life with evil intentions on trying to mate with him for all the wrong reasons.

If there were more Neko’s out there, he feared what it could mean for his baby cousin.

Just the thought of it made him stop by Seung Hyun’s office, just to check up on him. When he got there, he found Ji Yong with Seung Hyun in that one floor level that his uncle Dong Wook had created for Seung Hyun. Both Seung Hyun and Ji Yong were sitting close together, watching television, while they ate what seemed like a pile of fish. The sight of it was delicious, but it made Siwon question how much they had devoured before he had found them.

“Hey Hyunie, Oddball,” he greeted them. “Ah, what did you two do?” Siwon asked, with a slight pout on his face that completely caught both boys attention. “did you  make plans to wear matching beanies today?” he asked, smirking when Seung Hyun and Ji Yong both looked over each other’s beanies. They were both wearing black ones, with late white NY plastered on one side of them.

“Come to think of it,” Seung Hyun said, as he swallowed his food.

“We telepathically decided it, yes,” Ji Yong finished with a slight giggle.

“Aww, look at you two being so cute,” Siwon laughed, before he frowned, “You make me sick,” he joked and let himself sit down on the floor.

“No one asked you to come and be sick here, go be sick at home,” Seung Hyun said, pocking his cousin as he did so. Siwon grabbed Seung Hyun’s hand to stop him from pocking him.

“Yah, yah, that hurts.” He muttered, and pushed him away. “Why are you two watching this?” he asked when he saw that they were watching a familiar paternity show. Right now he didn’t even want to think about anything that had to do with paternities, fathers nor mothers.

“Bom-noona was here,” Seung Hyun said and Ji Yong nodded his head.

“Yah, she said not to change the channel cause she was going to be right back,” Ji Yong said but then frowned, “wasn’t that a  half hour ago?”

“I think she wanted to leave you guys alone, but also didn’t want you doing naughty things so she said she would be back any second,” Siwon said, his voice teasing. It felt nice to be here. Knowing that Seung Hyun was safe, but it was hard to tell if he was going to stay safe for long. There was still so many worries running through his mind.

Siwon changed the channel and decided to watch a game show. The game show soon became boring to both Seung Hyun and Ji Yong as the both of them moved to join Siwon on the floor. Except that the two of them were facing each others, their legs interlocked as they talked over what seemed to be cute and meaningless things. It was so odd to see Seung Hyun getting along with someone, especially someone like Ji Yong who was obviously very confident and very much mouth and sharp when he wanted to be.

If Seung Hyun teased Ji Yong, the little blond had a way to turn the tables, and get him to stop. If Ji Yong pouted, or started to whine about something, Seung Hyun seemed to know what to do or say to get him smiling or giggling once again. It was almost as if they were in harmony with each other, but at the same time it was hard to tell if they really were or not.

Eventually Seung Hyun tried to kiss Ji Yong, only to have the blond turn his head. Ji Yong would then laugh, but then coax Seung Hyun to try again.

“That’s one kiss for your cheek, your nose, your chin, your eyebrow…” Seung Hyun counted off making Ji Yong cover his face. It seemed like the boy was grinning widely, but he was covering his face. Seung Hyun laughed, and tried to get Ji Yong to show him his face again. “Come on, I’m not done trying,”

“You’ve already kissed my whole face though!” Ji Yong said, and looked up. His eyes were shinning with so much mirth in them.

“Not your lips,” Seung Hyun smirked when Ji Yong blushed.

“Yah, let me try then,” Ji Yong said. He leaned and tried to kiss Seung Hyun, but managed to get his chin since Seung Hyun moved away. He pouted, and tried again. He was expecting to miss, but with his eyes closed, and lips puckered, Seung Hyun himself aimed for Ji Yong’s lips. The kiss was fast, didn’t even last that long, but already both of them could feel a sort of spark between them, which seemed to grow the more that they kissed.

“Cheater,” Ji Yong called, throwing himself back, until he was lying on the floor. But the look on his face was happy. Inside though, Ji Yong was struggling to keep himself from purring. He was not the only one, Seung Hyun was right there with him. Crossing his legs and resting his head on his hand, Seung Hyun watched Ji Yong. His eyes traced every line, and seemed to devour anywhere where his skin was exposed, especially that little sliver of flesh that showed as his shirt rode up a bit.

Siwon really did find it sickingly sweet, but already he could see that his cousin was in love. No, maybe it was too soon for that. Maybe it wasn’t love, but there was definitely something there. Something that proved was going to be strong between them.

Something Siwon was going to have to take into account now. If Ji Yong was going to be a part of Seung Hyun’s life, he was going to have to protect him as well.

Just as it started getting late, and the workday ended, Seung Hyun chose to drive Ji Yong home. It seemed that it was Seung Hyun whom had gone out to pick Ji Yong up earlier and brought him to work with him. Kind of a dangerous move on his part in case his father found out that he was slacking off, but he had done it anyways. But then again, he wouldn’t be Seung Hyun if he had not pulled that stunt.

Siwon on the other hand went home after he got Seung Hyun to promise that he was going to go and spend the night again. He had even extended the invitation to Ji Yong, but the blond had declined seeing as his parents were expecting him home. It seemed like they were going to go out for a family dinner, otherwise he would have hanged out more with Seung Hyun.

When Siwon got home, he went in and started to breathe hard. It was almost as if the day’s problems were really starting to get to him. His heart, that was what he had been ignoring until that very moment, hurt. It hurt so badly. Siwon pressed a hand to his chest and tried to will the pain away. It just seemed like it was never going to go away.

He fell to his knees, and for a while it seemed like he was not going to get up again. But he did. He crawled his way to the couch, and there he set himself for sleep.

He was just dosing off when the door opened and Seung Hyun walked inside. His cousin made a bee line towards him and looked at him with a pout.

“Will there be no dinner?” the white haired neko dared asked.

“I don’t feel like cooking, if out want to go out to eat,” Siwon offered.

Seung Hyun nodded, “Sushi,” he said, and got to his feet once more, ready to go. Siwon stopped him though, grabbing his arm.

“Before we go, there is something that I have to tell you,”

Seung Hyun looked at his cousin. He knew he had been acting weird all day today, but he was not sure why. And now his cousin was not even looking at him. Could it be something bad? Either way, Seung Hyun waited to see what he would say.

“I talked to Hee Chul today, and he told me things that I didn’t expect.” Siwon started to say, surprised when his voice cracked, “He is the enemy,”

“What?” Seung Hyun asked, his eyes going a little wide. “What do you mean?”

“Hee Chul said that he was created to track down spliced species that his father altered,” Siwon said, “My guess is that he wanted to see how many survived and there could be a lot more Neko’s like you out there…and…”

Seung Hyun was still confused, but even more he was worried about his cousin who was now crying. Siwon was the older one. He was always so strong, sure, and Seung Hyun looked up to him despite his sense of humor. To see him cry was a shock.

He moved in to hug his cousin, and held him tightly trying to get him to stop crying. It just wasn’t right.

“Everything will be alright,” he whispered. “It’ll be fine,”

They both weren’t sure if things were going to be alright, but one thing was for sure, they were going to have to tell Dong Wook.

Ji Yong and his parents were at a family diner, eating dinner together. It had been a long time since they had hanged out like this. As a real family. It almost seemed like a rare occasion now a days, but he knew that they all missed it, and enjoyed it.

When he excused himself to go to the restroom, he paused when he opened the door and saw that Hee Chul was there. He seemed like he was just finished using the restroom and was about to go back to his seat.

“Ji Yong,” Hee Chul greeted with a smile.

“Hee Chul, hi.” Ji Yong said, feeling odd around him. It was a different vibe that he was getting from him compared to the night when they all had hanged out. There was something different about Hee Chul, that much he was certain about.

“Ah, I’m blocking your way,” Hee Chul said, and moved to the side and got out. Ji Yong turned to look at him, and narrowed his eyes before going inside. Hee Chul would have thought that Ji Yong would stay and perhaps talk a bit more, but the boy hadn’t.

He narrowed his eyes.

It seemed like Ji Yong’s instincts to get away were high, and they didn’t seem to fail him. He had seen it in his eyes. That flash of assurance that he was not going to let himself be tricked or pushed around. There surely was a fire there.

That would just make things harder on him.

But for now, Hee Chul let it be. But as he paid his bill and walked out of the restaurant, he pulled out his cell phone. For a moment he considered what he was going to do. He thought about Siwon. Thought about everyone that he was going to be hurting by doing his job. For now the time was stopped and he wasn't exactly actively looking for no one. but in the end the decision wasn’t really his, so he dialed the number.

The time was starting now.