I knelt there, in front of the three grave markers, not blinking. One might have thought I was a statue; part of the graveyard itself. The grief that overwhelmed me didn’t allow me to move as I stared at the new stones marking two of the fresh graves. Samantha Elizabeth Lee and Lee Hyunshik. Why? That was the only thing going through my head. Why them? Why not me? Why leave me here alone? As I sat there, the tears finally came, tracing little lines down my scratched and healing cheeks.

“Mom…Daddy..,” I said in a strangled whisper. “Why?!” I snapped, sobs racking my chest as I cried over their headstones. My mother and father, too quickly taken from me. Why did this happen? Why couldn’t it have been me who had died? Why did it have to be them? As I cried, I looked over at the third grave. Park Junghee. The name that looked back at me brought a whole new wave of tears and sobs. “Jagiya…” I hunched over the graves, holding my arms close to my body. I continued to cry as the rain began to fall. Gently at first, then it became a downpour, soaking through my thin jacket and clothes. I shivered, but didn’t move. I needed to be close to my family. I didn’t notice the man who came up behind me.

“Miss? Are you alright?” A deep voice asked from behind me. Do I look alright?

“Y-yes,” I managed to get out through my sobs. “I’ll be fine. I just need to be alone.” I felt the rain above me stop and shivered as the wet clothes leeched the warmth from my body.

“You shouldn’t be out in this rain. You’ll get sick,” the voice persisted. Can he not take a hint?

“I said I want to be alone.” Whoever was behind me rested a hand on my shoulder. I shrugged it away. “Do you not understand simple Korean?!” I stood look up at whoever was there. “Leave me alo-” I stopped when I saw who was behind me. Now my eyes are going to play tricks on me?

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just don’t want you to get sick.” The silver haired young man said, concern thick in his voice. I stared at him for a minute then looked back at the graves.

“I’m sorry. I’m not in the best of moods right now.” I wiped away the water that was on my face, unsure what were tears and what was rain. The man was quiet as he looked at the graves with me.

“You’re family?” He quietly asked. I nodded. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you.” We were quiet as we stared at the stones.

“Who is the third? He has a different name.” There was a pain in my chest when he asked that.

“He…he is…was…my boyfriend.” I covered my mouth as I finished the sentence, the sobs coming back. My knees gave out and I fell to the ground, but the man caught me, holding me up. “Four years! It was going to be four years!” I yelled. “Why?!” All I felt was anger and confusion. Seeing their names staring up at me, a constant reminder of that night, was like a knife to the heart over and over again. The silver haired man let me stand there and cry on him, staining his shirt.

“It hurts now, I know, but it will get better,” he murmured into my hair. I shook my head.

“You don’t understand. I’m all alone now. I have no one! My mom…my dad…my boyfriend. They’re all gone!” I grabbed tighter onto his shirt. “I’m so alone…” He stood there quietly as I cried.

The wind began to pick up, nipping at my skin. The water on my clothes was the heat from my body and I shivered, pressing myself unconsciously closer to the man holding me. “You’re getting cold. Come on. I’ll take you home.” I shook my head violently.

“I don’t want to go back there. It’s so empty…” He looked at me for a minute or two.

“Okay. Why don’t you come home with me then? We need to get you warm and dry.” He started to lead me out of the cemetery.

“Wait!” I pulled out of his grip and ran back to the graves. Out of my pocket, I pulled a prayer hard, one I had written myself. I kissed it and placed it on my father’s grave. “I love you all…” I ran my fingers over each of their graves before running back to the man waiting for me. “Okay. We can go now.” He smiled kindly at me and took my hand.

“This way.” We walked briskly through the rain, holding hands the whole way. It was comforting. He took us to a set of dorms and I gasped when I saw the name. YG Dorms. YG? As in YG Entertainment? The man next to me was smiling as he led me around back, avoiding the eyes of the girls camped out in front of the building.  

“YG…So it isn’t a trick of the light, is it?” I asked, more to myself. He looked down at me.

“What isn’t?”

“I thought I recognized you. You’re a singer.” He smiled and nodded, guiding me into the building.

“I am.” He let go of my hand and bowed to me. “I’m Choi Seunghyun. T.O.P. of Bigbang.” I bowed back to him.

“I’m Hei Ryung Lee. Or Lee Hei Ryung. Whichever order you prefer.” I stood up and shivered again, wrapping my arms back around myself to conserve what little heat I had.

“Nice to meet you. Now let’s go get you warm.” He guided me up to the top floor of the dorms and let us in to a rather nice dorm. The furniture didn’t match anything, but in that way, it all worked together. It was cozy. I could hear music coming from down a hallway. It sounded like it was English. American pop? “Yah! Jiyongie!” TOP called as we walked down the hall towards the music. The music died and a young man with a boyish face peeped out of one of the rooms.

“What is it hyung?” Then he noticed me and his eyes got big. “Geez! You’re drenched! Let me get you some clothes!” The door shut and quickly reopened. He had a pair of grey sweat pants and a baggy looking t-shirt in his hands. “Here. You can use our shower.” I heard Seunghyun chuckle beside me as the boy handed me the clothes.

“Okay, I’ll show you to the bathroom. I’ll introduce you when you get cleaned up.” I just followed along quietly as he pushed a door open for me. “Everything you should need is in there. Use any of the soaps you like.” I nodded to the kind man.

“Thank you.” He just smiled and pulled the door shut. A warm shower was the most amazing feeling. The hot water washed away the tears and the cold that had seeped into my bones. I finished my shower quickly, not wanting to inconvenience anybody, and changed back into the clothes the boy who I’m assuming was “Jiyongie” gave me. I sighed as I stepped out into the hall and hesitated before I followed the voices to what I guess was the den.

“That was fast,” the boy said. I scratched my neck nervously.

“Yeah, I didn’t know if anyone else was going to need it.” Seunghyun chuckled at me and I blushed.

“Come here and meet our leader.” TOP motioned me over to him and I complied. “Hei Ryung. Meet the leader of Bigbang, Kwon Jiyong. Also known as GDragon.” Jiyong stood up off of the couch to greet me.

“Nice to meet you,” he said with a huge grin on his face. I bowed back to him.

“Likewise. Thank you for the clothes…”

“Not a problem! Any friend of hyung’s is a friend of mine.”

“You’ll meet the others later,” Seunghyun said. “For now, let’s watch a movie. We have nothing to do today.” He smiled down at me. “If you want to I mean. If you have somewhere else to be, I can take you there…” I shook my head. No, I didn’t what to go anywhere. The only place I had to go was home, and I couldn’t bring myself to go back. Not yet.

“A movie sounds nice.” He smiled at me and pulled me to the sofa where we watched several movies before I finally dozed off.

I woke up to the sound of snoring. I smiled and snuggled with the man next to me. I love the days I’m able to wake up next to Junghee. My eyes snapped open. No. Junghee was…dead.  Without thinking, I pulled away from the sleeping figure and ended up landing on the floor with a thud. I stifled a groan as the figure sat up and stared down at me.

“Ryungie? Are you okay?” I started up at Seunghyun on the bed. Right. I remembered falling asleep on the couch with him. He must have carried me to bed when he saw I was out. I stood up quickly and straightened my look.

“Yeah…I’m fine.” I flashed him a strangled smile. “Thank you.” He smiled at me and stood up.

“Let’s go eat breakfast.”

~~~                        ***                        ~~~                        ***                        ~~~                        ***       

Over the following year or so, Seunghyun and I grew closer. He would take me out to eat, or to see a movie and then I would spend the night at his dorm. I told him he didn’t have to, that I felt guilty he was doing so much for me, but he would just smile and say he didn’t mind. He said he liked having me around, that I made him smile. We would always sleep together in his bed but because of that I felt bad. I would wake us both up in the middle of the night with my crying or quiet screaming when I would have nightmares. Every night, the nightmares, replays of the accident that killed my loved ones, plagued me. Seunghyun would wake me up and hold me until I calmed down. I was the cause of him losing sleep, but still he said he would rather me be happy. Eventually, the guilt I felt began to get to me.

It was after Seunghyun stumbled in one afternoon from a photo shoot.  He collapsed on the sofa and in minutes, he was asleep. I knew it wouldn’t have been so bad if he had been getting more sleep during the night. This relationship that we had was hurting him and I couldn’t let that go on any longer, so I decided to put an end to my welcome. We were the only two home, so I quickly wrote him a letter, telling him how thankful I was he found me in the graveyard that day, and how much what he had done meant to me. I also told him not to find me, that he was better off without me in his life. I kissed the folded letter and placed it gently in his open hand before I took my exit. I felt the tears start to run down my face as I headed for my empty house. I ignored the tug in my heart that told me to turn around. The one that told me to go back to him. Now I truly had no one. Not even a friend (was he just a friend?) to lean on.

I spend the days now at home. I’m an author, working on my first novel and living off of the insurance and inheritance of my mother and father. Many times, Seunghyun has tried to contact me via text or calls, but I just ignore them, my heart breaking over again with each ring. He’s so much better off without me.

I let out a sigh as I grabbed my coat and umbrella along with the white and blue flowers I was taking for Them. I was on my way to visit their graves again, and replace the flowers that were there. The sky grew darker and darker as I approached the graveyard and the smell of rain hung in the air. As I wove through the headstones, my eyes caught sight of a figure kneeling over a set of graves. The graves of my mother, father and Junghee. I stopped walking when I was within earshot of the man. He was covered head to toe in black and had a hat on his head that hid his face. I could barely hear his talking.

“Mr. and Mrs. Lee. I know you never knew me, but I wanted to tell you that you have an amazing daughter.” That voice…Seunghyun…  “I can’t even begin to explain what I fancy about her. She’s perfect. With her I felt complete. But not too long ago, she left without saying goodbye. I can’t find her and I’m asking for your help. Please, help me find her. I’m so empty without her.” He hesitated for a minute. “I love her, you see.” I gasped and dropped the flowers I was holding as rain started to fall from the sky. He heard me and turned to see who was behind him. When he saw me, he stood and walked quickly to me, stopping shortly in front of me. “Hei Ryung…” I stared up at him with teary eyes, silent. “Ryungie…” He grabbed me in his arms, holding me tight against him. “I was so worried. You left me. You didn’t say goodbye. I couldn’t contact you.” I started crying as I returned his hug, wrapping my arms tightly around him. It felt…right.

“Seunghyun…” I whispered. He held me tighter. “Seunghyun…I didn’t know…” He pulled back from me and looked me in the eyes, his hands resting on my cheeks. “I’m so sorry…I didn’t know.”

“Shhh. It’s okay. I’m not upset.” He wiped the tears and rain off of my face. “Lee Hei Ryung. I should have told you this before, I love you.” I stared at him, not sure of what to say. My eyes flicked to the graves of my family and decease boyfriend. No. This is what he would want. He would want me to be happy. I looked back into Seunghyun’s pleading eyes.

“I…I think…I love you…too.” A smile formed on Seunghyun’s lips and he tilted my head gently, eyeing my lips.

“May I?” I closed my eyes in answer and felt his lips press gently to mine. There was a spark between us as I kissed him gently back. He kept the kiss chaste and ended it quickly before letting me go and grabbing the flowers. He placed them over the graves. “Thank you. I’ll take care of her. I promise.” I watched him as he said a prayer over them before returning to my side. I smiled softly up at him and chuckled a little. “What’s so funny?” he asked as he took my hand.

“This.” I gestured around us. “So much like the day we met.” Seunghyun smiled at me.

“You’re right. But now it will end so much differently.” He wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me to him. “Now let’s go home.” We walked together out of the graveyard, a happiness filling my whole being that I hadn’t felt since the day of the car wreck. I was whole again.

It doesn’t seem fair when bad things happen to good people. Right after the car wreck, I couldn’t help but question why the three most cherished people in my life had to die while I and the driver at fault got to live. But now I understand. It was all for a reason. Because I lived, I met Seunghyun. I met Bigbang. I got my novel published. Because I lived, I got the chance at a life I never thought I would have had. Everything happens for a reason. And my reason just so happens to be Choi Seunghyun. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

:3 Well, I wasn't really sure where this one was going at first, but I think it turned out alright! :D I'd love to know what you guys think about this one. It was a lot of fun to write! Thank you everyone!