Siwon's pov.

You take a handful of water from the sink and splash it on yourself. Pathetic, you tell yourself.

This whole Hyoyeon thing has been going on with you for quite a while — last year, at SMTown Paris, right before Super Junior's performance. You were so exhausted, unlike the rest of the members, you haven't gotten enough rest. You have just came from filming a drama in Taiwan and the flight all the way from there got you even more jaded. You felt like your body was giving up on you but then you saw Hyoyeon. She was standing outside SNSD's dressing room, you know that she was always the first one to get ready and fix herself and was waiting for her members to finish. You find her pretty ever since the first time you laid your eyes on her, but during that time, something about her makes her beautiful you swear you almost catch your breath just by looking at her. You didn't know if it was because her honey blonde hair was down or the way she stood there, her arms crossed, her expression almost serious. And it's not often one catches her in a moment like that, because she's the laughing Hyoyeon that does all sortsof craziness and everyone gets a laugh.

When she turned her gaze towards you—probably because you've stared at her for too long—she recognized it was you and her face automatically lit up. Your heart, strangely, skipped a bit.

She ran up to you and enveloped you into a hug. Suddenly you felt like you were not tired anymore.

During the dance battle, a part you couldn't afford to miss, your eyes were glued to Hyoyeon from start to finish. And you realized it has always been like that for as long as you could remember.

Hyukjae and Donghae were the first ones to notice. "She's like a sister" was always your excuse but they wouldn't buy that. They told you to man up and tell her your feelings because, anyway, "Choi Siwon gets any girl he likes." You told them Hyoyeon isn't any girl and that shut them up.

That didn't stop them from teasing you, though. Sometimes it annoys the out of you because it gets out of hand. Donghae and Hyukjae would take Hyoyeon to their drinking sessions and Donghae would send you photos of her holding a bottle of soju, smiling brightly, as she's squeezed between the two guys. And you couldn't do anything about it because you're in the middle of filming your latest drama.

You know she doesn't have any feelings with those two but you still can't help but be jealous. Heck, you're jealous with any guy she's with.

When it's Hyoyeon, you're no longer Choi Siwon, the asian superstar. You turn into this pathetic, lovesick puppy—not to mention very ually frustrated.

You knew she was staring at you earlier when you were your fingers. You didn't even intend it to be lustful in any sense but it caught her attention. It took you a bit of willpower not to grab her there and kiss her hard and do other miraculous things you could do to her in that little sofa of yours. 

It also didn't help the fact that she had to mention your two closest buddies and you decided she was doing it on purpose to make you feel jealous. Well, she succeeded because you actually were, and you had to punish her for that but you ended up torturing yourself.

You went as far as climbing on top of her and just the feeling of her under you was almost enough to drive you crazy. 

You thought you had it under control but you had to see her chest heaving against the fabric of her sleeveless shirt, her voice sounded breathless, begging you to stop. It was so easy for you to imagine a nearly similar scenario but you swear that you would both enjoy it.

Thankfully, your mom arrived and you saved yourself from an impending hard-on.

You can survive tonight, you tell yourself as you look in the mirror. You just have to be back on Choi Siwon-oppa mode. Hyoyeon is your dongsaeng—very y—but still your dongsaeng. Right, she is.

You walk out of the bathroom, your head down as you think of the funny moments with your members. You stop on your tracks when you see a pair of dainty feet—your gaze go a bit higher and you see a pair of creamy white legs—even if you don't loop up you know who they belong to.

"It's my shirt," you tell her. She's wearing your navy blue shirt, you remember only wearing it once because it's too big of a size for you. Plus you prefer clothes that hug your body perfectly.

It looks huge on her too, the hem of the shirt falls halfway on her thighs. You know she has clothes on your walk-in closet for the many times that she's spent on your room but she's exchanged her sleeveless top and skinnyjeans for your shirt. You don't know what could be the reason, maybe it's one way of telling you that life is cruel. That, or she's just old enough to wear your shirt.

"You look serious, Siwon," she notices, "If you mind me wearing this I could just—"

"No," you say rather hurriedly. Your cheeks begin to warm up when you realized your voice went an octave higher than it normally is. "I mean, yeah, you can get whatever you want from my closet. It's okay."

She gives you a weird look. You excuse yourself to make some phone calls.

You're blessed with good looks and the body to make you a full-packaged deal. Not mention all the talents you have. It's barely a wonder why women throw themselves at you. You have politely refused some of them, because that's who you are, your parents taught to grow up being a gentleman. But you're a man after all, you have needs, that's why you're more than willing to indulge yourself from time to time. You can't even say that you've pursued a girl before because women will always show you even the slightest interest.

But you see Hyoyeon now, climbing on your bed, and she covers herself with the blanket. You can no longer see her legs. You let out a sigh.

"Siwon, you still there?" Your manager asks you at the other end of the line.

"Yeah, I'm sorry," you say. "9 AM tomorrow, right?"

"Yes, get some good sleep. Okay?"

Beside the woman that you have feelings and dirty thoughts for? "Sure?"

"Goodnight, Siwon."

"Goodnight, hyung."

Putting your phone on the bedside table, you get into the bed.

"What are you doing tomorrow, oppa?" she asks when you've finally settled.

You face her. "Two photo shoots and one CF. What about you?"

"I'm going shopping with the maknae," she says excitedly.

"You still have time to do that?"

"If one doesn't have Choi Siwon's schedule then it's possible." You smile. She always know how to tease people and she does this with subtlety.

You grab the bible on the bedside table and pull it open where you have carefully bookmarked the page. Reading few verses in the bible before you go to sleep is your nightly routine.

"If you were not an idol, would you have become a priest?" She asks after you've done reading.

You grin at her question. "That's actually my childhood dream but I don't think I would."

"Why not?" she asks, confused. 

"Because," you look at her, a serious expression on your face, "I don't want nuns to sin."

It takes a moment before she realizes what you mean. "You're a jerk, you know that, "she says, scowling.

You laugh. She looks like a kid. And before you could stop yourself, you ask her to come closer to your side, as there is still a decent space between the both of you.

It's not unusual—for the many times that she's slept on your bed, you have actually held her more than once. When you began taking acting jobs, you have been watching a lot of films, it's one way of of educating yourself. Sometimes you watch with Hyoyeon, and she would fall asleep especially on serious ones. You would carry her to bed. You sleep together—a space between you—but you know that she would snuggle up to you, anyway.  You didn't mind the slightest bit not until you realized you have feelings for her. When she leaves in the morning, you feel empty. Like the bed's not the same without her there.

"Siwon," she murmurs your name, her back to you. You put an arm around her waist, and you bury your face on her blonde hair.

"Hmmm," you say in response, but it's more like your reaction to the smell of her hair—a mixture of vanilla and honey.

"You were right, you know," she says.

"About what?" You ask, but her scent is incredibly distracting you start to nuzzle her head. The temptation of kissing her nape is too strong, you pull her much closer to you.

"I was thinking about you earlier. When I saw you your fingers, I've felt things about you I've never really felt before..." You smile. It's only Hyoyeon who can be this truthful, even when it means embarrassing herself. But you like where this is going so you don't say anything to interrupt her. "I think I like you."

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes, I'm sure. Is it weird?"

You release her waist and let her faceyou. You cup her chin. "No, Hyoyeon. It's not weird. I like you too."

"You realized that tonight too?" she asks, skeptical.

You chuckle. "No, my dear Hyoyeon. I knew I have feelings for you since SMTown Paris."

"That was last year! Why did you only tell me now?"

"Besides the fact that I'm dumb, I thought you could never see me more than an oppa. Turns out I'm wrong,"

She gives you a wide grin. "Choi Siwon chickened out on a girl, that's unheard of."

"Well,you're the first one." You tellher, taking one of her fingers and playing biting it.

"So what do we do now?"

"You're not seriously asking that, do you?"

Her eyebrows furrow. "What do you mean?"

"You were teasing me all night long."

She slaps your arm. "I am not," she protests.

You shake your head. "The damage has been done. You deserve punishment for it."

"I could just scream," she says, poking your chest.

"Oh, I will make you."

"You really are shameless, oppa, "

You grab her waist, eliciting a surprised squeal from her. But you drown the sound by putting your lips on .

Something tells you that you should have done this along time ago, but it doesn't matter now because you have her. It's not too late, at all.

the end

---

sorry for the little delay - been caught up with watching a lot of tv episodes! thank you for all your lovely comments, they were the reason why i updated hehe :)

you know what, siwon and hyoyeon aren't actually my ultimate otp. it's just that, i like them individually. but they're hot together! :

i want to know more of you, let's be friends ^^ talk to me here http://ask.fm/jongwoons