I love a boy.

His name is Choi JunHong and he’s six years younger than me.

But that doesn’t stop me from having these feelings for him. In fact, almost everyone I know harbors, if not a lot, at least some emotional ache for the eighteen year old teenager.

It’s almost impossible for one not to fall for such a lovely boy as JunHong. Girls flock all over him whenever he comes around. They worship the very ground he walks and adore every single thing he does.

From the way he smiles, his aegyo sal and his cute teeth and the sweet dimple that hollows into his right cheek, to the manner of his every so often naive blinking. JunHong melts and steals hearts with ease.

He’s a giant of a boy yet his baby self is still very much in him. Everyone dotes on him because of his childish behavior. His effortless aegyo even makes noonas swoon. They even admire his unblemished complexion and ask for skincare tips for better looking skin.

As if getting all the attention from girls isn’t enough, he receives a lot of interest from the males as well. It’s almost impossible not to like JunHong because he’s just that likeable. The respect the other guys and hyungs have towards him shows just how much everyone loves him.

He’s never left out from any goings-on or outings. If truth be told, he’s the guest of honor in every occasion. Everyone wants him to be wherever there’s something up. He’s the popular guy, the person everyone wants to include in their group.

And his cheerful spirit while he’s on the pitch, his dribbling skills, and also his victory shout whenever he scores a goal, gets everyone smitten with Choi JunHong. He always gives a lot in everything he does. Be it soccer, rapping, dancing, or skateboarding. Passion is never missing from them.

They are always awed by his skills in everything he does. Nothing seems to faze them even if he messes up a bit. They take it as an endearing side of him. His mistakes are nothing more than loveliness that makes them adore him even more.

Every time there’s an exam or quiz, JunHong is the person they go to for lessons, tips, or answers. He’s a genius in all subjects. All the teachers are always amazed by his talented mind. They claim that he’s the new Einstein. There’s no way not to be fond of him when he possesses everything a person would want.

Everything about JunHong is loveable. To everyone, he is the definition of perfection. It’s as if they couldn’t see a distinct flaw in him. Choi JunHong is the adorable teenage prodigy.

They even nicknamed him after a god, Zelo, the god of rivalry. Because to them there’s no one who can compete with his charm, his subtle charisma that overtakes his cuteness in seconds which drives his admirers insane. His flawless appeal never fails to attract people to him.

JunHong is a walking excellence. Someone who’s born only once in a thousand years, an Adonis rather than a Zelus, because that’s what they have made of him.

Nevertheless they forget that he’s also a creature.

JunHong isn’t a god. He is created just like everyone, even if he has more allure, there are still flaws in him that make him just another creation.

Some may assume that his aegyo sal are natural, but they fail to notice that they are more than just fat, they are eye bags. Tired eyes that have seen more of life than any of them could imagine.

And the smile that causes his dimples to show, they hide what he really feels inside. It masks the true emotions of a sad little boy. A boy who had lost a part of him that he doesn’t even know of.

A lot of them think that his blinking is out of habit, but it’s not. He’s in reality trying to make out the world from the windows of his soul because he’s only a pitiful boy, still struggling to find his way in life.

Because JunHong is a person.

He is not flawless, he is full of flaws. The wonder boy who they see having fun on the soccer field; he’s just trying to do his best in everything. Soccer is his only way to forget about his problems in life, the only thing he can do to keep his thoughts away from the troubles that keep him up at night.

They believe he loves doing whatever he does. All the activities he immerses himself with, he gives his best in them. But he does them for the reason that he hates everything. He even despises himself.

Because JunHong is a being.

He exists just the same as any other being. He doesn’t think of himself as special. The people around him made him someone he’s not. And he actually has to live with it; he has to put up with what everyone around him expects of him. There is no perfection in him at all.

But he puts on an act so as not to make the people around him worry. He smiles, but he’s suffering inside. He laughs, but he’s hurting within. He says he’s okay, but the pain is evident in his eyes.

What they don’t realize is that he is Choi JunHong.

The only time he can truly be himself is when no one is around him, when no one expects anything from him. He barely gets this chance because there are always people around him.

But when he gets that moment, he will smile a genuine smile. And then he will cry. He will let down his defenses and be the lost little boy. He will cry until he falls asleep.

That is when I hold him together in my arms. I embrace the JunHong that nobody knows about.

I love this boy.

Because he is Choi JunHong.

And merely human.