You looked at the large box infront of you. "what the heck is that, a giant teddy bear?"

You pulled the strings off and read the note attached to it. "Your dreams come true, all in one."

"pfft.. Dream come true my foot. My dreams in korea." You muttered.

It took you 10 minutes to push the entire box into your living room. "what the heck is this it's so darn heavy!"

You slowly teared off the scotch tape, opening the box, to see Himchan infront of you, wearing a large red bow on his head.

"HIM-HIMCHAN OPPA?!" You screamed and you fell onto the ground.

Himchan smiled and he held his hand out. "Stand up silly."

You refused to move and he immediately pulled you up. "~~~~~~." He said, as he hugged you and pulled you closer.

Kicking the box aside, and pulling off the red ribbon, he lowered his lips. 

"Happy birthday." 

You shot up in surprise. That was the weirdest dream you ever had.

You looked at the clock, it's 3 hours before school starts.

You laid back down and tried to go back to sleep, but failed.

Immediately you took out your phone. You started blogging on a private space, that not much people knew about.

"The weirdest dream i ever had.

Himchan was so close. The one i really wanted to be with was there, for me. Well.. in a box.. but you know.

He called my name."

You typed and tears began to form in your eyes. You sat up straight, blinked the tears away.. and continued your little post.

"I want to see him, with my own eyes. 

I want to meet him, like other fangirls do.

I want him to love me, as much as i do.

Nothing's impossible, right? 

I don't think being friends with you is impossible.

Liking you.. Sometimes i question myself. Why do i like you so much?

You're someone i really really like.. Feelings build throughout the years..

Have you ever thought of me while i think of you?"

Tears streamed down your eyes. You took a tissue. 

You wiped your eyes.

"Reading fanaccounts, listening to my friend's stories.

It hurts..

Sometimes fanfics too.. I always wondered. Will this ever happen to me?

I mean yes, it's a fanfic.. But my experiences with you..

It's exactly like a fanfic.

My life's a fanfic.

The amount of times my friends told me. ~~~~~. You're so lucky.

Idols notice you, you're pretty, Himchan knows you.

I don't like the attention.

I don't want anyone to know what we have between us.

I must be crazy, but..

I just want..

You to love me too.

Like how i love you."

You wept, quietly in your room, falling asleep with tears in your eyes.

Himchan read the post and his eyes too, appeared tears.

He found your blog, years ago, you put it as your link then. When he was a trainee. But you deleted the link off soon after fans started noticing you.

Reading your blog..Thats how he started to like you.

He read your daily posts. Telling him more about you and your personality.

He had to admit, he hated the idol world.

Girls were all pretty and nice infront of fans, but behind? Gross.

Himchan read the post, again and again.

"Is this how ~~~~~ feels?"

As an idol, Himchan knew, that this feelings were real feelings.

Fan girls love, but the love he received from you, was more than that.

No one ever made him feel this way.

He scrolled past your posts, and sadness filled him.

"Why, do i like you so much? You're someone, on top. Girls adore you. Many girls out there are prettier than me. They're so much better than me. Why would you even like me? All this indirect messages, am i being delusional? It might be a coincidence."

"Liking you was the best thing that ever happened in my life.

I changed.

I was a , a girl with no love for anyone but herself.

I despised my friends and i always fight with my family.

I backstabbed.. I hurt.

Knowing you made me love. 

I love you so much, Kim Himchan.

From your perspective, i'm just a fan. Someone who cheers you on, like everyone else does.

From my perspective, you're everything i want, i wished for, i want you to be mine."

Himchan dropped his phone and stared out the window, looking at the moon.

"I knew she liked me.. I didn't know.. She'll like me this much.."

*I like you too.. But...* Himchan sighed.