He’s sweating.

He clutched so hard onto the sheets of his bed, his eyes open wide, his gaze focused on the ceiling. People found it utterly weird that a grown man had an intense fear of the dark.

Ever since he was a child, he spent his night in his parents’ bed, wriggling in between them for both comfort and a security; his parents being two walls that protected him, their warmth allowing him to sleep without any problems.

However, no one is forever young. As soon as he turned 12, his parents found it ridiculous that he’d still sleep in between them. Being the silent kid, he never dared to talk about his problems, and just it up. He had to deal sleeping in his own room, all alone, the darkness slowly consuming him.

Worst case is: he couldn’t sleep with the lights on. He just couldn’t, and wasn’t allowed either. His family was poor, and they barely had money for food, and letting the lights on for an entire night would be the end of them.

Thus, Seunghyun dealt with it. He held in his need of going to the bathroom at night. No matter if he had a flashlight or not, he still would get that feeling of someone watching him from behind, him feeling shivers going through his spine.

This entire phobia jazz started when he first tried sleeping in his own bed at the age of 6. He was excited by the idea - as it made him feel all mature and grown up – that he couldn’t close his eyes for one second and decided to have a little adventure beneath the sheets.

How he wished he just stayed there.

For some reason, while trying to fall asleep, he suddenly felt something shift on his bed. Or at least imagined. Being the curious young child he was, he peeked. Never had he been so horrified at the sight of a four-armed Cyclops, that strangely looked like the four armed goddess Kali, albeit never having seen or heard about her before. The way she moves was so surreal and abnormal to him that he wanted to cry, thinking it was its intention to hurt him in any way, and by being simply plain freaked out by it.

He didn’t dare to run to his parents. He was scared it would follow him, and that it would catch him and lock him up somewhere. Scared, he hid beneath the sheets again, letting it serve as some kind of protection barrier. Later, when he peeked again, it was gone.

In high school, he was picked on when his story has been gossiped about. He wasn’t hurt physically, but was damaged psychologically. He didn’t dare to look others directly into their eyes, always wearing rather dull coloured clothes to blend within the crowd. He wasn’t shy nor insecure; he just felt very unprotected in dark environments, and preferred not to get into any kind of trouble. It’d be too tiresome.

Being born with black hair, he despised it. Black was the colour of darkness, and it always felt like he was bringing and/or attracting it to him. Thus, he dyed it brown, and he was surprised on how good it actually looked on him.

It made him uneasy to see the colour black, may it be clothing-, accessory-, or hair-wise. When a student transferred into his class, he was amazed by the bright and cheerful colour of their hair, albeit unexpected and totally what he had never seen.

Pink hair, pink freaking hair. Pink.

How the guy looked so amazing with that pink hair was beyond Seunghyun’s imagination, but man, they really pulled it off well.
It didn’t take long for Seunghyun and the new student to become friends. He learned that his name was Jiyong, one year younger than him, and liked peppy colours.

However, every time Seunghyun looked directly into Jiyong’s eyes, his heart would drop and he’d avert his gaze immediately. They were as black as the night sky. So deep and mysterious, their intense colour screaming for Seunghyun to look, but he didn’t dare to. Not even one bit.

It was so bothersome of how he was currently seventeen and he still had this problem. Jiyong asked “Hey, what’s wrong?”, but he was too chicken to reply and just shrugged it off with a small shake with the head plus a smile.

“Please, look at me”, were the boy’s words, his voice desperate for Seunghyun’s gaze at him, but it was no use.

“Please, don’t hurt me”, cried Seunghyun in front of Jiyong, shocking the latter. Confused, they caressed Seunghyun’s head, comforting him and slowly wrapping his arms around the sobbing male. He looked so vulnerable, that was so contrary to his fierce look, eyes confident and facial features sharp and intimidating.

I’ll fight by your side.

Seunghyun couldn’t believe what the boy said. Ever since then, they became long-time friends. They went through so many things together. Losses, fights, drama, laughter, comfort… almost everything. Jiyong was always by his side when his phobia for the darkness triggered, holding his hand to let him to know that he – this time – wasn’t alone.

But now, he was. Once again, he returned to the start. His eyes still glued to the ceiling, letting tears roll over the side of his face, that he had then covered with both hands as he screamed out. He didn’t care if he was waking up his neighbours. He needed to let it all out. He cried and cried, but the negative feelings and thoughts seemed infinite.

Screams. Laughter. Hugs.

Now he had no one who would fight by his side. That one loss was his biggest loss. The loss of his long-time friend, and lover.

Never had he felt so empty and lonely.

... And the darkness was slowly devouring him.

So yeah, was in the mood of writing an angsty oneshot for a change. ouo;;
I love writing angst and sobstories. It breaks my heart but I love to cry and sad scenes. Why, I do not know. I guess it's just a guilty pleasure, eh?

This was a relatively short oneshot, but I hope you liked it nonetheless!