How nice it felt to finally be walking outside again. The wind through her hair; the birds chirping around her. Spring was easily her second favourite season. There was even a slight skip in her steps. The barista greeted her over the counter.

                “Good afternoon, Mrs. Kim,” the younger lady said, “You look especially cheerful today.”

                Sunny smiled. “It’s a good day. I’ve got a good feeling about things. I love your new earrings, Dohee.”

                Dohee blushed. “Thanks. My boyfriend bought it for me for our 100 days.”

                Sunny smiled warmly. Celebrating 100 days. That memory hadn’t been recalled for a while.

                “Just the usual, Mrs. Kim?” Dohee asked. Sunny replied with a nod and leaned against the counter as Dohee worked her magic with caffeine. There was a light classic jazz song filtering through the café which caused her to lightly drum her fingers against the counter.

                How long would it be, before she could sit in front of him and drink this coffee together? How long would it be until she could touch his face with her hands? How long before she could kiss his lips, his nose, his ears, his being?

                “Here you go. One medium coffee with one sugar and an iced Americano,” Dohee returned, shaking Sunny out of her thoughts.

                Sunny thanked her and left her extra tip just because she was in such a good mood.

                The correctional centre was only down the corner at fifteen minutes tops if she strolled leisurely. The sun was even brighter as she stepped outside with the beverages. She breathed in the spring air once again. It was so good to be walking.

                A smile formed on her lips as she remembered the day at the amusement park. Seokjin had been so nervous. It wasn’t even the first time the two of them went out together. But she knew that something was different when he kept calling her the night before, asking whether the blue shirt would go better with the black trousers or the red shorts. She immediately told him not to pick the red shorts at any cost.

                “Promise me you’ll be there tomorrow, okay Sunny?” he said desperately through the phone.

                “I promise, Oppa.”

                “Thanks, you’re the best. And… Love you.”

                Chuckles. “Love you too.”

                Knowing Seokjin’s personality, he would arrive half an hour earlier than the anticipated time. She was correct. She didn’t want to be late either so she arrived ten minutes earlier.

                Upon meeting each other, he complimented her, “You look very pretty today.” She detected a slight nervous tone underlying the words.

                “Thank you,” she replied. He waited for her. “And you look especially handsome today. I mean look at you, you even wore a tie. That’s green. With a red shirt. Wow. You’re practically the walking Christmas tree.”

                He looked at her with alarm. She giggled. In a deft motion, she removed the tie and slipped it into her purse. “You can have this back at the end of the day,” she . Removing Seokjin’s tie reminded her of all the times she had helped him get ready for work.

                “Honestly, what would I do without you?”

                “You’d probably be sweating at home. Repeating the words ‘Will you marry me?’ over and over in front of your mirror.”

                He stared. “Wait. How did you – ”

                “She’s going to agree, Seokjin. Don’t worry,” she reassured him.

                It had taken him forever to even ask the pretty nurse from his work place out on a date. Their first contact was surprisingly simple – from when the nurse had bumped into him while crying about how she had just needed to put down her dog. They had encountered each other outside the room where Seokjin had usually counseled Taehyung. A few weeks later, they went on a date but the nurse only went because she was friends with Sunny. It wasn’t until the moment she found out that Seokjin had been the one to console her when nobody else seemed to understand, that she willingly sought to meet Seokjin again. Since then, their love blossomed innocently and half a year later, Seokjin told Sunny that he was going to propose.  

                “Okay, I can see her in the distant. She will be here in about a minute. Breathe. Just act normal.”

                The happiness of the memory when the nurse said yes caused a feeling which bubbled to enter into Sunny’s heart. Her own marriage seemed like a distant dream. Technically, she was still married but the feelings of being married and seeing the person she loved was but a butterfly flying further away.

                Her cell phone buzzed.

                She set the coffee down on a bench right outside the correctional centre.

                Seokjin had always about the childish romance of bringing an extra coffee when she visited Taehyung. It was not like he could drink it. It always just sat there, in front of the screen where she would watch him speak into the air of the room. But to her, seeing the coffee across from her and seeing Taehyung through the screen was almost as if he was really there; that he really was sitting across from her at the table.

                Like they were out on a coffee date.

                Like they were a normal couple, doing something couples do.

                The phone buzzed again. It was a call from Seokjin.

                She picked up, “Calling to thank me once again? I humbly accept the gratitude.”

                “Sunny,” Seokjin breathed into the phone. There was something different in the tone of his voice. “Are you…. near the building?”

                The good feeling she had been carrying around with her all morning slowly morphed into something else. It was ugly and made her stomach churn and her toes curl.

                “I’m right outside. Is something wrong?”

                “You should come in right away. Taehyung. He’s… He’s in the operating room right now. He’s hurt.” The words no sooner entered her ear and she was sprinting towards the correctional center’s doors. Her heart was beating so fast it was the only thing she could hear in her ears. She forgot the coffee on the bench. She forgot her bag. She forgot all of herself as she ran up six flights of stairs to the medical room. Her knee screamed in agony when she reached the operation room but she was unaware of the physical pain.

                Seokjin turned when she rushed in. He saw her limp towards him and caught her when she collapsed. He helped her sit and waited until she caught her breath.

                She didn’t. She couldn’t wait. “What happened? Is he okay? Why is he in there? How did he get hurt?”

                Seokjin patted her back. He could see that if she continued talking, she would start hyperventilating. “Sunny, breathe. He’s badly injured, but the doctors are doing everything they can for him right now.”

                “You said he was only hurt over the phone. You didn’t tell me it was bad.”

                “There was a lot of blood when we found him. He’s got lacerations across his legs and his arms. But the doctors are giving him stiches as we speak. It’s just blood loss.”

                “There was blood,” Sunny whispered the repeated words. Her head spun as the events of that night suddenly came back.

                “The nurses found a piece of glass in the room.”

                “How could there be glass in the room?”

                “There was an incident a couple days ago that involved another inmate going into his room and trying to escape. He broke the window, that’s all. Nobody’s hurt.”

                “Oh my god,” she hit Seokjin on the chest, “You promised me that you’d tell me everything that happens concerning Taehyung.”

                “It was a small incident. Conrad Jackson’s been transferred to another facility and nothing like that will ever happen again.”

                A thought dawned in her head. “He cut himself, Seokjin. It’s exactly like what happened the first time. Oh my gosh. It’s happening all over again.” She stood up, pacing the floor in circles.

                “Sunny, sit down. You’re going to injure yourself. You were limping on the way up.”

                His words fell on deaf ears. “I can’t let him hurt himself again. I just can’t see him in any more pain,” Sunny cried. The tears started falling without her wanting to.

                He took her into his arms.

                “Seokjin. I promised him that things would be okay. How did this even happen? He was doing so well.  We were starting to talk. He was being so receptive; so normal.”

                “Sunny, we always knew that there was possibility that it could happen again. It was uncertain when it would happen so we all kept an eye on him.”

                “But he’s not your responsibility. He’s mine. We promised ‘until death do us apart’. But I couldn’t stop him, again. I tried so hard but he wouldn’t listen to me,” she said into his shirt, “And this time, it’s the same thing. I couldn’t do anything. I’m so useless.”

                “Sunny, don’t blame yourself. It happened in the middle of the night. None of us knew.”

                “Tell me he’s going to be okay.”

                He did not respond.

                She pulled away from him. “Tell me he’s going to be okay,” she demanded.

                “I – Sunny…” his voice trailed off.

                “What are you not telling me?” she said, reading him like an open book.

                He stood up and swept a hand through his hair. Before Sunny arrived, he had debated the whole time whether or not to tell her or keep the information to himself.

                “Seokjin,” her voice was stern, “Tell me.”

                “Beside the weapon,” he began cautiously, “We found something else.” He listened for any type of response but she was only staring intently at him. “We found a bag of pills.”

                “You’re telling me he hasn’t taken any of his medication?”

                “No, he’s taken his medicine. The nurses make sure of it. But we think he’s just not been taking all of it.”

                “What does that mean for him?”

                “Well, possibly nothing.”

                “But…”

                “But… I caught him once. We were talking for one of our sessions. Just about us, him, you. And he said something about you that might have triggered something. When he thought I wasn’t looking, I saw him take the pills.”

                “So what does it mean?”

                Seokjin turned and looked her straight in the eyes. “Sunny, I think he remembers. I think he remembers it all.”