*YOUR POV*

(FLASHBACK *dundundun +insert dramatic music here+ BEGIN)

A little girl stood behind her mother, trying to get her attention. She was holding a beautiful piece of paper, covered with her creative drawing. “Mama!”

The lady turned to her, exasperated. “What do you want?”

“Lookie!” The little girl handed her mother the artwork. “I drew it for you!”

The lady barely glanced at her. “Don’t bother me with such trivial things. Go play in your room.”

Dejected, the little girl slowly walked away, tears forming in her eyes. Years of being ignored stung her little heart. Stumbling through the doorway, she ran into her father.

“Why are you crying?” He demanded. “Are you not happy? I buy you the latest toys and accessories and you’re repaying me by crying? Go to your room and stay there!”

Her mother appeared. “You annoying little brat! I dress you in the nicest clothes. Go look around and see if other little kids your age are wearing brand name clothes. You aren’t satisfied, are you? You won’t be happy until you’ve wasted all of our money!”

The little girl was too terrified to speak up.

No, she wanted to cry out. No, I don't want all of those things! I don’t care about clothes or toys or accessories. I JUST WANT TO BE LOVED!

However, she bit her tongue and bowed. Turning around, she ran to her room and locked herself in.

From that day forward, the little girl no longer cried. Her innocent smile was gone.

It was only until the little girl reached middle school and persuaded her parents to let her live alone that her smile slowly returned, yet her eyes were empty and lifeless.

That little girl… is me.

(FLASHBACK END)

“You don't have to be strong and hold it all in,” Odagiri said softly.

I turned my head away.

“You can shed tears and ask for help,” he continued on. “You’re not alone. I’m here.”

“I don’t need help,” I gritted my teeth.

“You’re lonely, aren’t you?”

How is it that this boy that I’ve only known for about two weeks can see the real me when my parents who’ve known me my whole life can’t?

Why is it that when I’m around this boy my wall that I’ve built around my heart comes crumbling down?

He’s been breaking down my barriers piece by piece.

Heck yes, I’m lonely.

Though I have friends and family who shower me with love, growing up without receiving that love from the people who matter most to a child- the parents- has left me feeling empty.

I’m lonely.

Because deep down inside, I know that I yearn for my parents to turn to me and ask me how my day was. I crave for the day that they’ll tell me the three magical words “I love you”.

And deep down inside, I know that that day will never come.

Throughout the years I’ve convinced myself that I was fine.

I’ve convinced everyone else that I was fine.

Yet this boy managed to crash through my defenses and he’s stripped me bare. With him, there’s nothing I can hide.

Why is that?

“You’re lonely,” Ryu repeated. “You live by yourself. Your parents don’t spend time with you because they’re too interested in their own selfish lives. At school you have lots of frrends. You have your grandfather and yakuza family and Sho. But at home, where it really matters, you have no one.”

I flinched. Before, with his lonely accusation, he hit close to center. Now he’s hit a perfectly clean bulls-eye.

“I know what that feels like,” he continued on. “My parents never notice me. It’s like I don’t exist. I’m not there. At least I have their company. You don’t.”

Tears started to fall from my eyes.

What is going on?

Am I… crying?

My shoulders started to shake.

Am I… crying?

Odagiri pulled me close to him and wrapped himself around me, comforting me like a mother would comfort her baby. “It’s okay,” he whispered. “It’s okay.”

For some reason, I felt safe in his arms. I felt… loved.

I let my tears come.

Finally at long last, the tears that I’ve restrained for my entire life came flooding out as the boy who turned my life upside down rocked me, calming me.

“Thank you,” I sniffed as my tears drew to a halt.

He rested his chin on top of my head as I leaned my head against his chest.

I began to tell him about my nightmares and the reason behind them.

His eyes were full of pain as he heard my story.

“What’d they tell you?” He asked.

“Never mind.” I shook my head. He nodded, understanding. I continued on.

I told him everything else, something I had never done to anyone before. From Harumi’s first sign of jealousy to her final visit, tears falling here and there.

When I finished, I relaxed back in his arms, tired. I looked up at him in the moonlight and my eyes widened when I saw blood on his lips. Without realizing it, I reached out and wiped the blood away.

He his lips and winced as he tasted the blood. He wiped the rest away with his thumb. “I guess I bit my lip too hard… but that’s not what’s important.” He my hair gently.

“But…” I was concerned.

“Your feeling are more important,” he stated plainly.

“You…” I watched his face.

My feelings?

What were my feelings?

Sitting here in Odagiri’s arms, I felt a sense of peace that I’ve never felt before. I felt safe and protected… I felt like he really cared and like he really listened.

I felt like…

I love him.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I’m sorry about everything that happened. And I feel honored that you’re telling me this.”

He closed his eyes and I could feel his heartbeat quicken.

Odagiri Ryu, I… love you.

I leaned forward and placed my lips softly against his. He kissed me back gently at first, then more urgently.

Ryu pulled back, his eyes conflicted with emotions. The most prevalent one: Doubt. His eyes searched mine, trying to find confirmation.

“Ryu… I.” I struggled, trying to get the words out. “Dai suki. I love you.”

His eyes widened.

I slowly untangled myself from him and headed to my room, those cursed tears once again threatening to fall. Idiot. He wouldn’t love a girl like me.

Just as I reached the door, I felt his arms wrap around me. “Say that again,” he breathed against my neck.

I turned around. “W-what?”

He looked at the floor, his face blushing. “Say that again.”

“Watashi wa Ryu ga dai suki.” I also placed my gaze on the floor, feeling myself redden with embarrassment.

He tipped my chin up. “I love you too,” he smiled sheepishly, leaning down for another kiss. He pushed me against the wall, his lips never leaving mine. I wrapped my arms around his body, running my fingers through his hair.

When he finally pulled back, I was gasping for breath.

“You’re pretty sly,” I laughed as I pushed him away.

He tapped my nose. “And you’re a pretty good kisser,” he teased.

I stuck my tongue out at him. He caught me around my middle and threw me on the couch and began to tickle me merciless. Soon a tickle war erupted, which soon turned in to an all out pillow fight.

Moments later we were laying on the floor, laughing and wheezing.

“You’re cruel, you know that?” Odagiri groaned as he held his ticklish sides.

“You started it. I warned you not to tickle me,” I shrugged, sitting up happily.  

I threw a pillow at him and it landed on his head with a poof.

“Evil…”

I laughed. “ to , huh?”

I plopped down on the floor again beside him. “Hey mister, just because I kissed you today doesn’t mean you can go crazy,” I warned. “No funny business.”

He pouted. “But what if I wanna kiss you again?”

I tilted my head to the side, considering. “Fine. Kisses only.”

He got up to his feet and knelt down, holding his hand out to me. “Will you be my girlfriend?”

I rolled my eyes. “Did you really need to ask?”

“Nah… but I’ve never asked a girl out before… so I wanted to try.”

I rested my hand in his. “Of course I’ll be your girlfriend, you dork.”