The group guesting at Strong Heart was over and so the members headed out to have a late dinner, except Youngbae who still had a radio guesting at Sukira.

Before the others left to eat delicious grilled meat and lettuce and kimchi and ribs that they were all craving for, Youngbae sadly asked to be dropped off at the KBS building first.

"But that's way off course! We'll be going farther from the food!" Seungri whined and started jumping at the back seat of the company's van.

"Shut up, Seungri. You'll be eating anyway." Jiyong told the maknae because Jiyong was hungry, and if you ticked him off while he had an empty stomach, it could mean the end for you.

Seungri kept shut his mouth and nodded, knowing first hand the effects of what could happen if he continued, since he did almost meet his end once; it was terrifying. Poor Seungri can still feel the arms of Jiyong constricting around his whole head.

"Thank you, Seungri-ah." Youngbae told him teasingly for he knew all to well what happened to Seungri that time.

They finally arrived at the KBS building, and Youngbae got out of the car.

"What time are we picking you up?" Daesung asked. Sometimes Dae was the responsible one, and today he was.

"Uhm, around 10:30-11? Will you be done by then?" Youngbae told him.

"Yeah, I think so." Dae answered.

"Okay, have fun. Eat well." Youngbae said and waved goodbye, then closed the door.

But as the door was closing, he swore he heard Seungri yelling "Food, food, food!" And then Jiyong telling him to "SHUT UP, SEUNGRI. SHUT UP, SHUT UP!!!"

Youngbae watched the van pull away before he went inside. He laughed silently. He thought about how ridiculous the guys could be sometimes but they are who they are, and if it weren't for them, he didn't think he'd be who he was now.

-----

Towards the end of the show, he knew he had to perform something.

Of course he was asked here to guest, but since he was a performer, they didn't think he'd just talk on a radio show. Yes, he would have to sing. He'd dance if he could, but who would see him? It was a radio show after all.

"Taeyang-ssi," Eunhyuk of Super Junior started.

"After all this talk about love and Valentine's Day," he continued.

Youngbae thought this was funny. Out of all the members in BigBang, he was chosen to talk on a pre-Valentine's day special. It was all pretty ironic.

"Would you please sing a song for us?" Eunhyuk asked.

"Of course," Youngbae told them and stood up to get to the mic.

"Would you like to say anything, Youngbae-ssi?" Eunhyuk asked.

"Uhm, yeah.. This goes out to all of you who've ever loved." And lost, he wanted to say, but he didn't want to make melancholy of everyone's happy dispositions.

He told them he was ready, and the track started to play.

"I thought that things like this get better with time
But I still need you, why is that?
You're the only image in my mind
So I still see you... around"


On the other side of town, four men eating their dinner at this quaint, homie restaurant were listening to this radio show.

They apparently just tuned in a few minutes before Youngbae sang.

"Ah, Youngbae hyung is hurting now, isn't he?" Seungri asked after finishing a plate of Kimchi.

"Yeah, I guess so." Daesung answered the younger man.

"It's just sad they had to meet again like that." Jiyong mumbled before taking a bite out of his food.

Seunghyun all the while just stayed quiet.


"I miss you, like everyday
Wanna be with you, but you're away
Said I miss you, missing you insane
But if I got with you, could it feel the same"

He thought about her. Everything about her. He missed her so, so much.

Now, he was doubting whether he should have let her go or not. How did she still have such an effect on him? They've been over for four years now. Why is it that it's still her he looks for? He just wanted her.

He remembered driving to the mountains, having picnics on the field, lying down on the grass and just being in each others embrace, feeling the warmth of the sun.


"Words don't ever seem to come up right
But I still mean them, why is that?
It hurts my pride to tell you how I feel
But I still need to, why is that?"

"Can we just end this now?" He asked her, solemnly.

"What?" She answered back. There was no evidence of shock in her voice. She just wanted to make sure she heard him right.

"I think its best if we break up," he told her solemnly.

She nodded, accepting what he said. "Why?" was all she asked.

"Because you deserve better," he said

On an outsiders point of view, she did deserve better.

He always comes home late, he's always tired. He no longer gave her any attention.

It was the prime of his career and balancing that whilst keeping a relationship intact was difficult.

But an outsider's opinions weren't important because the relationship was between both of them, and that was all that mattered for her.

He thought otherwise though. The sadness he dawned on her, the false hopes of a night out, even just being together seemed impossible, and it was killing him that he made her sad. So he thought of the quickest way out of hurting her.  'I'm doing this because I love her,' he thought. She deserved someone who would always be there for her, day and night, every second of every minute. She deserved someone who'd keep her happy and smiling, not someone who would make her wait, and be sad. So, he decided to let her go because in his head, that guy who'd keep her happy wasn't him.

She was crying at this point, but not the frantic, unable to breath crying. The tears streamed heavily down her face, but through them, she tried to smile.

She shook her head and said "No, I deserve you." Then she walked over to where he was, kissed him goodbye on the cheek, and left.

He stared after her longingly. Did he do the right thing? He knew it would hurt now, for the both of them, but in time, it would pass.

She'd find someone else, and so would he. She'd learn to love another and he would too, but he was sure that he'd love no one else the way he loved her.

And as he continued staring at the now empty doorway, he let the tears silently fall.

"It don't matter who you are
It's so super, I feel it
But it's everything no matter who you love
It is so super, I feel it
But it's everything"

He closed his eyes as he finished the song, feeling all the emotion it had and just sang it as best as he could, which in fairness was very good.

He opened his eyes to see the people within the room just staring at him in awe.

He couldn't help but feel so smug inside, dspite the mood surrounding him. 'That's YG, baby' he thought.

"Thank you," he said as the last note ended, and they all applauded him.

A few minutes after that, the show ended. He stayed a while with a few of the hosts of the show but then excused himself because he had to leave.

The moment he got to the lobby of the building, the van was already there and so he jumped in. Seunghyun was driving, which was unusual, but nevertheless, he didn't question the eldest one in the group.

"How was dinner?" he asked. They all gave comments of appraisal, for they were regulars at the restaurant they ate in and the cook was more than familiar with their faces.

"Ahjumma gave you this," Daesung told him and handed over a bag of food.

'Thank you, kind lady!' Youngbae's heart, and stomach, yelled.

Youngbae smiled, but then the look on his faced took on that of a confused child's.

"Where are we going?"

"We're going to look for her, Bae." Jiyong said, starting the conversation.

"What?" He was more than shocked.

Lots of things went through his mind but one just kept on popping up.

"but she has a kid," he said.

"Who gives a is she has a kid, hyung?" Seungri said.

"I--" he couldn't even say anything because Seunghyun interrupted him.

"Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and you are seeing her because you deserve to see the one you love."

He looked at the eldest one in the rearview mirror and saw that Seunghyun was upset.

He was upset because he didn't like seeing any of his dongsaengs hurting and he'd do whatever just to make them happy.

It just so happened that Seunghyun, with minimal help from Jiyong because it wasn't Jiyong's stories to tell, knew all along what Youngbae needed to make him happy.

"Thanks, hyung." Youngbae said, and finally, smiled.

a/n

I'm sorry if this came out kind of...crappy? I hope it didn't though!

Seunghyun to the rescue! :D --because he cares so much for the younger ones, aw.  :)

Anyway! Here, you guys deserve cupcakes for subbing, reading and commenting. Thank you so much! :D

Oh, also, my friend Koji asked me to put his name on here, so there. It's here now. He says hi. Hehe.

And if you could help him distinguish right from left WITH WORDS, that would be very helpful. :)))

PS: the italicized words in gray are flashbacks

MUCH LOVE,

-Tone