“Uhm… It just got so quite so we were afraid you killed each other” HimChan mumbles while pushing Zelo and JongUp out of view “We didn’t know you were… “

 “What is with your right hand?” YoungJae interrupts having noticed how Alex is holding onto her wrist while the hand just looks dead. YongGuk frowns and moves a little back forcing her to retrieve her hands from around his neck. Alex sighs and lifts her right hand, she has kind of gotten used to it but when reminded she can’t help but feel affected “It… the nerves in my arm got damaged” she then says “I can’t use my hand yet” she lets her hand drop and moves it behind her back “They say I should be able to use it but it’ll take time” she looks down and mumbles.

YongGuk frowns feeling very bad for forgetting about her injuries and whether or not they were healed.

“You can’t use it at all?” Zelo frowns and walks over to her

Alex shakes her head and lets him take her hand showing that she can hardly make her fingers twitch “Does it hurt?” Zelo asks

“I don’t notice most of the time” Alex explains “Sometime it just acts up and hurts like hell but most of the time it is just… kind of dead”

“What about your leg?” YongGuk steps closer again “Your rips? Should you even be standing?”

“I’m fine” Alex looks at him and smiles “I have been walking since… well 4 days after what happened I started humping around. My rips are healed and my leg is fine I just have to be careful”

“You are being honest now?” YongGuk looks a bit skeptical “Don’t make it seem better than it is”

Alex looks at him realizing just how hard it is for him to believe her and the cruel reality hits her making it very clear that they have a long way to go before the trust they used to have is back. YongGuk can see the happiness fade from her eyes and frowns himself “Sorry”

“No” she shakes her head and looks at him “I know I need to earn your trust again. I know that”

YongGuk looks down

“Uhm maybe we should…” Daehyun starts and pushes the others towards the door

“But…” Zelo frowns but gets a hand over his mouth by HimChan “They need to talk” HimChan whispers and pulls him out. The door closes and the silence left in the room is almost painful. Alex looks at YongGuk and holds onto his arm “I’ll do my best to earn your trust”

“It is just…” YongGuk swallows “You always said everything was fine even when it wasn’t. I just find it hard to believe that you will tell me if it isn’t”

Alex nods “I understand” she smiles reassuringly and steps closer planting a kiss on his cheek. YongGuk smiles a little and puts an arm around her shoulder “This isn’t going to be easy”

“Are you having regrets?” Alex looks up at him

He looks at her taking in her face and shakes his head “No” he smiles a little “I want to try” he looks at her right arm and sighs

Alex follows his eyes and looks at her arm as well “I’m worried about getting my mobility back” she confessed and looks back at YongGuk “But if I do my exercises and don’t try to overdo it I should at least get some of it back”

YongGuk nods silently

Alex feels her leg starting to ache a bit from having been standing for a while “Can I sit?” she ask and YongGuk quickly nods and lets her sit on his bed.

“I have to tell you something” Alex frowns and looks down “Please sit”

YongGuk nods and sits down next to her “I have something I have to tell you as well” he mumbles

“Can I start?” Alex asks and YongGuk smiles a little “Are you going to ask me every time you want to do something?”

Alex blushes a little and scratches her neck “I’m nervous!”

“You nervous?” YongGuk smirks a little “With me?”

“Yea” Alex nods and looks at him. He seems to have changed a lot when she was away and he seems a lot more sure of himself around her and she isn’t sure if I is the time apart or the things he said when he told her off or even the fact that he told her off that makes her look at him differently but she does.

YongGuk smiles “You start”

Alex takes a deep breath and looks down at her knees “You met Sok?”

YongGuk looks at her “Someone from your team right?”

“Yea” Alex nods “He stammers quite a bit”

“Oh right” YongGuk nods “He saved me from a beating”

Alex looks over at him and frowns

“Uhm… when I came to the hospital to see you your team didn’t want to let me in. I punched that big guy… The young one… Sok… he stepped in and stopped it before it escaladed. He had recognized the tattoo on my shoulder” YongGuk explains “So they let me in”

Alex smiles a little “Sok always asked me about that tattoo. He really likes it” she then turns a bit more serious “Sok is… 15 years old now. His parents gave up on him more than 1 year ago and I found him in a mental institution where they said he was too dangerous to be around people”

YongGuk frowns. That was not the impression he had gotten off the kid “Why?”

“He has temper problems. He was so afraid and shy, didn’t want to say anything because everyone used to about it but when he got angry he was unstoppable” Alex explains “He just needed someone to understand him. His parents were hopeless” she huffs “They didn’t care about him. His mother was scared of him and his father beat him”

“But he seemed like such a nice kid” YongGuk frowns

“I know” Alex nods “I took him in my care about 2 months before you gave me the ring”

“You didn’t tell me…” YongGuk looks down at his hands “How… you had a kid in your care and you didn’t tell me?” he frowns

“No” Alex shakes her head “Another stupid decision. Sorry”

He just nods silently and sighs

“Then… some months ago… I adopted him” Alex says and YongGuk quickly looks at her “You… You adopted him?”

“He is like a son to me anyway and I love him and I’m so proud of him” Alex can’t make herself look at YongGuk “He was so happy” she smiles softly “Seungho and the others already accepted him and tries to make him comfortable but he still calls all of them sir” she shakes her head a little “He calls me boss no matter how many times I tell him he doesn’t have to”

YongGuk looks at her smile, the pride is pretty clear and he can see she really cares about the kid

“I thought you might want to know” Alex then says and sends him a glance “I probably should have said that sooner. And… you met Pong then as well I assume”

“Pong?” YongGuk frowns

“Yea… Sok is the young one, Kwan is the big one, Fuji has glasses and then there is Pong” Alex explains

“Oh right” YongGuk nods

“Pong was the one… who told me where I might be able to find you when you got kidnapped” Alex says and takes a deep breath

YongGuk’s expression changes completely “What? You got that guy on your team?”

“He wasn’t part of it. Back then he was just a drunk. I probably should have told you that as well” she mumbles and looks down shamefully

YongGuk scratches his neck and nods “Would have been nice to know…”

“Sorry” Alex frowns

“Is there anything else I should know?” YongGuk frowns “What about the rest of your team?”

“Well Kwan isn’t very smart but he is like a big boulder that can move” Alex mumbles “Park who used to be in my team always said I shouldn’t be with an idol but he was a good guy. He is in Japan now…. Fuji is the son of a yakuza boss… He took great care of me” she smiles a little and YongGuk scowls a little already disliking Fujiwara. He saw how he looked at Alex back in the hospital “Alright” he mumbles with gritted teeth and looks away.

Alex looks at him “What?”

YongGuk takes a deep breath deciding that he better confess to what happened with Jieun before he starts sounding jealous and he looks back at her shortly before looking down at his hands “I kissed Jieun”

Alex’s eyes becomes bigger and she just stares at him

“We didn’t just go out… we actually…” he frowns “I didn’t have with her!” he quickly ads “I couldn’t”

Alex leans back and looks a little to the side feeling a bit betrayed

“I was pretty pissed that I couldn’t” YongGuk mumbles starting to see how wrong this can go “So after I dropped her off at home I went to a club… and picked up another girl”

Alex stares at him and he starts shrinking in his seat “You did what?!”

“I didn’t have with her either” he quickly says and sends her apologetic look “I couldn’t”

Alex stands up and walks away

“Alex you can’t be angry with me” YongGuk pouts “I was upset and hurt and thought you had moved on”

Alex shakes her head and looks back at him “Sorry then” she turns again and walks over to his desk keeping her back to him. YongGuk sighs and rubs his eyes. Off course she would be angry but he didn’t think she cared about him anymore when it happened. But knowing what he knows now he may as well have been cheating on her.

He stands up and walks after her “Alex I’m sorry but I…”

“You don’t have to explain” Alex mumbles “I have no right to be angry”

“But you are” YongGuk sighs

Alex frowns and grits her teeth

YongGuk stands behind her and places his hands on her arms “They just weren’t you” he mutters “They couldn’t touch me like you used to…”

Alex pushes him away “I really don’t want to know how they touched you”

YongGuk looks down “Sorry”

Alex looks at him knowing she shouldn’t be this upset because they weren’t together because of her but logic and rationality doesn’t really matter to her right now. Just the thought of YongGuk touching another girl or getting touched by another girl makes her want to scream.

“Alex?” YongGuk looks over at her with an apologetic expression “Please forgive me”

“Don’t ask me to forgive you. You were free to do whatever you wanted” Alex says and looks down “There is nothing to forgive”

YongGuk walks over to her and lifts her left hand holding it in his own “I only love you. Don’t tell me you aren’t angry when I can see you are”

“I just don’t think I have the right to be angry” Alex mumbles and frowns “Jieun… she had a crush on you before… Hyosung told me… She said…” she looks up at YongGuk “She has been after you for a long time”

YongGuk lets out some incoherent noises not really sure what to says “Well… I… she…”

“How long after I left did she start coming around?” Alex frowns

“I don’t know… A month…” YongGuk mumbles looking a little like a child afraid to get scolded “She didn’t know before…” he shuts his mouth just as Alex narrows her eyes “That !” she snaps and heads towards the door but YongGuk is still holding her hand and stops her “Alex what are you doing?”

“I’m gonna kill her” she yanks her hand but YongGuk is stronger “Hyosung told me Jieun was always talking about you. The second she knew I was gone she jumped at the chance didn’t she?!”

YongGuk thinks back and frowns “Kind of… She was just being a friend”

“Talking trash about me!?” Alex narrows her eyes “And don’t lie to me”

“She may… have… said something less nice” YongGuk scratches his neck with his free hand “She was just trying to be understanding”

“Oh she is so dead!” Alex yanks her hand again and this time she gets it away from YongGuk who sets in a run after her and cuts her off at the door “Alex calm down”

“Tell me this” Alex takes a deep breath not looking any less angry “Why did you start doubting me? Was it purely my fault or did her talking to you help?”

YongGuk thinks back over the last many months and frowns.

“That’s a yes” Alex tries pushing him out of the way but he stands his ground and holds onto her

“Don’t touch me!” Alex steps away from him. YongGuk feels those three words like a punch to the face “What?”

“Sorry” Alex runs her hand through her hair and rather shocked herself. YongGuk looks to the side “We were broken up Alex. For all I knew you weren’t ever coming back”

“I know” Alex nods. Her right hand is starting to hurt and it show as it starts to shake but she moves it behind her back not wanting to draw attention to it

“So now you don’t want to be with me?” YongGuk looks back at her “Just because of that? I didn’t sleep with any of them!” he raises his voice a little

“I know” Alex repeats “Just the thought of your hands on someone else… I don’t like it. Jieun is very pretty and she doesn’t have my scars and my tattoos and she… she is fit without being too fit and the things you said…” she starts mumbling and keeps her eyes down. YongGuk smiles a little and steps closer, this is the first time Alex has been expressing any kind of insecurity in herself and her appearance. “That doesn’t sound like you” he says with a hint of teasing that just makes Alex look even more displeased “I know!” she whines loudly “I hate it!” she looks to the side trying to hide her blushing cheeks

YongGuk bites his lip to stop himself from laughing but his face is almost bursting into a big grin and he moves his head so he can still see her expression. She sends him a glance blushing even more when she sees his expression “Yah this isn’t funny!” She pushes him but he just flashes all his teeth and steps closer again “You think Jieun is more attractive than you?”

“Am I a freaking idol?” Alex scoffs and glares at him “She is gorgeous… I don’t wear short dresses or skimpy outfits and I don’t even know how to act cute! Not that I want to” she frowns and scrunches her nose kind of freaked out about the image of herself trying to do all the cutesy stuff Jieun does “And I couldn’t do a y dance even if I wanted to”

YongGuk laughs and turns her body towards him looking her up and down. She is wearing tight worn jeans with a simple long sleeved blouse with 5 buttons down the front, 3 of them are open in the top. The blouse is light grey and is a little loose but still fits her figure perfectly. It is very much her.

“Stop that” Alex sighs and tilts her head “I’m not an idiot. I was never you ideal type”

“I didn’t know that mattered to you” YongGuk raises a brow

“It didn’t use to” Alex grumbles and makes another annoyed scrunch with her nose

YongGuk runs his tongue over the edge of his lip looking closely at her. The majestic features, the sky blue eyes and the red hair today gathered in a ponytail. He remembers all of her tattoos but her body was always changing according to her how much she was working out so he can’t quite judge how she looks now.

Alex shakes her head and frowns “I didn’t use to think about the female idols… It’s not that I think I’m better looking or anything… I just didn’t think I had a reason to worry about it” she looks at YongGuk “I don’t know what I was thinking”

“I’m a little hurt by that” YongGuk says putting on a pout “Just assuming I didn’t find anyone else attractive even though you were never my ideal type…”

“You are not helping” Alex mumbles and looks down while YongGuk is struggling to not smile, he is probably enjoying this a bit too much but the validation he gets from her being insecure is worth more to him than her promises to change.

“You are beautiful Alex” he says and lifts her chin gently “Every part of you and I don’t want anyone else”

“I got more tattoos” She mumbles as if it might put him off but he just chuckles “Good. Then I got more excuses to see you as I get to know them” he smirks suggestively and Alex can’t help but laugh at him. This is the first time in a long time YongGuk has heard her laugh and it warms his heart. He notices her holding her right hand behind her and frowns a little.

He moves his hand down her right arm to her hand. Alex lets him and looks at her shaking hand which is still causing her some pain but it is nothing she isn’t used to so she doesn’t let it show.

YongGuk holds her hand in both his and brings it up to his lips giving it a kiss before looking her in the eyes “I want all of you Alex” he then says softly “I love all of you. From those blue eyes to the tattoos… your scars…” he kisses her hand again “I love you” he looks her in the eyes again “With every fiber of my being”

Alex grabs a hold of his shirt with and pulls him closer in a kiss putting all her emotions into it. YongGuk lets go of her hand and slides his arm around her allowing them to come even closer wrapped up in each other. YongGuk eagerly teases her lip with his tongue wanting more and she complies parting her lips. She feels a rush going through her almost taking her breath away completely and she lets a tear run from her eye and hangs on tighter only just now understanding that maybe she can actually be fix her life and be happy. YongGuk feels her shaking a little and he parts a little and looks at her still closed eyes seeing the tear falling from her chin “You okay?” he asks softly and she nods “I’m just… really happy” she smiles and opens her eyes a slowly till she meets his “I love you Guk” she smiles despite her shaky voice “So much”

YongGuk kiss her a soft tender kiss and moves her hands to her face cubing it gently “We’ll make it work this time. I promise”

She nods and he hugs her tight “You just got to listen to me woman” he teases and she laughs again and snuggles her nose against his neck “Anything you say my angel”

I love how some of you ship Alex and Seungho despite Alex being in love with YongGuk. Sorry I can't fufill that but I hope Alex with YongGuk is good enough. I love them together but I do love writing the Seungho Alex moments as well... I so would call my own cat BangHim if I had one :P Though it might be a bit awkward calling for it..

Alex is getting jealous and insecure realizing that she will have to fight to keep her man especially with YongGuk not able to trust her words. Remember he was complaining about her not getting jealous and asuming he was just alway there back after the big fight they had? Think a jealous Alex is a good thing? Imagine popular YongGuk surrounded with pretty girls and a girlfriend who enjoys making people scared. xP