Hi guys. THIS IS NOT THE END!! I just decided to split it into two parts because it's going to be a little longer than I expected. I still haven't finished the second part but I'm working on it right now.

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Donghae was pacing back and forth in the living room of the small apartment not knowing what to do. He wanted to break something, to punch someone. Thousands of thoughts were running through his head. He knew that Eunhyuk was no good. All kinds of different emotions were battling inside him at the moment and he didn’t know what to feel. He was angry with Eunhyuk and with himself at the same time. He felt betrayed, used, sad and stupid for believing in that jerk. But most of all he felt stupid, because he knew he still loved him.

‘Bastard’ He muttered under his breath.

It was not the first time something like that had happened. Donghae was naïve, he chose to believe that Eunhyuk loved him and thought that he would stop. He had closed his eyes and forgiven Eunhyuk’s doings only God knows how many times but right now it felt like it was too much. Eunhyuk has always been a player; Donghae knew it from day one. And because he knew, he couldn’t put the blame only on Eunhyuk. Donghae hated himself for not ending things sooner, like the first time he had caught him cheating. He hated himself for ever getting into a relationship with him. But no, this was enough; Donghae couldn’t do this anymore. He felt like he was broken on the inside, broken beyond repair.

He sat on the couch with his head buried in his hands. Donghae released a dark chuckle as he recalled what had happened. Flashbacks of Eunhyuk and this unknown guy making out in the middle of the club played themselves behind his closed eyelids. No, he didn’t cry, he didn’t want to. It was his own fault for ever trusting Eunhyuk, for believing that they could have a normal relationship. Because what they had was so damn dysfunctional, it made Donghae wonder how he had put up with it for so long. He had closed his eyes for Eunhyuk’s mistakes till now, but for him to start making out with some guy knowing full well that Donghae was there… that was too low even for him. No, Donghae has had enough of all this.

‘Ugh… how was I so stupid?!’ he thought out loud.

But still, he felt pain in his chest when he thought about leaving. He has thought about it a million times, but in the end something always stopped him from actually doing it. He couldn’t help it, he loved Eunhyuk with every cell in his body, even though he was just a cheating jerk who had no idea he was hurting him so much. Donghae couldn’t believe himself for having second thoughts again. 

The scene from the club played in his head again. Donghae cringed visibly, wanting nothing more than to forget about everything. He shook his head in order to get the painful image out of his head. He rubbed his eyes with his palms wishing for the image of Eunhyuk and that guy to disappear but it just came back over and over again. He couldn’t forgive Eunhyuk this time. It hurt him too much and he couldn’t take it anymore. This has been the last drop.

And just while Donghae was thinking about how ed up his life was and what he had done to deserve to fall in love with such an like Eunhyuk, he heard the front door unlocking. He lifted his head to look towards the door, even though he knew exactly who it was. No one else had keys to the apartment except for him and Eunhyuk.

Donghae tried to mentally prepare himself for the upcoming fight and to convince himself that leaving was the only option but these thoughts and inner agitations were all gone once he saw Eunhyuk’s face. Suddenly he forgot every insult he had in mind, everything he had planned to say was out of his head the second he saw him. He stared shamelessly at that beautiful face with plump pink lips, smooth milky white skin and sharp jawline, that never failed to make Donghae feel his knees weakened. And those eyes; these big brown orbs that looked so innocent and beautiful, the ones that Donghae first fell for. For a moment there, Donghae even considered the possibility of giving him yet another chance.

Eunhyuk closed the door after he entered and barely spared Donghae a glance. He was humming to a random song seeming totally unaffected by what he had done just an hour ago.  Soon Donghae came back to his senses and looked at Eunhyuk in disbelief. ‘Doesn’t this bastard feel at least a bit guilty?!’  He couldn’t help but ask himself. Suddenly, the question if Eunhyuk even felt anything for him at all crossed his mind. He didn’t look even slightly guilty about what had happened at the club. That made Donghae snap out of his daze for good. He was furious once again and had no plan of backing out now.

“Did you have fun tonight?” Donghae asked with sarcasm in his voice, expecting Eunhyuk to start explaining himself.

The older one was just passing by the couch, headed to the bathroom but what Donghae had said or more like the way he said it, made him stop in his tracks. That simple question was said with such tone Eunhyuk had never heard Donghae talk in before. It was filled with sarcasm and coldness, but at the same time he could sense that it was also filled with hurt. He froze in his spot, he couldn’t move a muscle. His mouth opened slightly as if to reply, but he didn’t know what. The way Donghae spoke to him so coldly scared him. His mind was running wild. What was he supposed to say? He knew he had to say something, he couldn’t just stand there not saying a word, that would only make things worse, but his mind just went blank. Donghae had probably seen him with that guy he didn’t remember the name of in the club.  Was Donghae trying to confront him? What did Donghae expect him to say? Did he want an apology? No, Eunhyuk had to keep his cool. He took a deep breath and opened his mouth again mustering all the courage he could to respond to Donghae’s question.

“Yeah, you could say that.” Eunhyuk replied sounding nonchalant, while he was actually feeling so anxious about what Donghae would respond that he could barely breathe. Maybe he shouldn’t have said it like that.

But before Eunhyuk even had the chance to start feeling sorry for what he said or think over the situation something else happened.

He heard Donghae sigh.

“I bet you did.” He said coldly again and stood up from the couch without giving Eunhyuk a glance.

He slowly made a few steps towards Eunhyuk until he was right in front of him. He never looked up to meet his eyes though.

“Well since you’re having such a great time on your own,” he began but it sounded more like he was just thinking out loud, instead of talking to Eunhyuk. “Then I guess there is no reason for me to stay here.” He finished, this time with a tinge of sadness apparent in his voice.

“Wh- What?” Eunhyuk asked stuttering slightly, even though he had a pretty good idea about what Donghae meant by that. He just didn’t know how else to react, what else to say. He had never imagined that something like this could happen.

Donghae just stood there. He was looking down at his hands, while fidgeting with his fingers and Eunhyuk knew he was hesitating about something; probably about what to say next.

“I-I’m leaving. It-It’s over.” He finally muttered, even Eunhyuk who was right in front of him barely heard what he said. But he did, and it made his heart twist in pain.

Donghae just stood there in front of Eunhyuk for a few more seconds, shifting his weight from foot to foot, but in the end he turned around and headed to their bedroom, without saying anything else. He couldn’t help but think that he should’ve done what he was about to do a long, long time ago. He had wasted two years of his life with someone he knew he had no future with.

He went inside, leaving the door wide open and began searching for his things through the many different drawers.

Deep down he had still hoped that Eunhyuk would feel sorry for what he did. Because if he felt sorry, that meant that he actually might care a little. Just a tiny bit. But that hope inside Donghae died when he saw that Eunhyuk didn’t seem to feel guilty at all. He didn’t even try to stop him. The way he talked to him just proved to Donghae that it was definitely not a big deal for him and it only made his decision final. No, Eunhyuk wasn’t sorry for hurting Donghae and he probably never has been; he didn’t seem to care about him at all.

He pulled out a medium size bag and threw it on the bed. He started frantically grabbing shirts and jeans and pretty much everything that was his. He wanted to get out of there. Fast. Because he knew that soon he’d fully realize what exactly he was doing and he’d probably break down. He didn’t want that to happen in here; not in front of Eunhyuk. Donghae didn’t want Eunhyuk to see him weak now.

Meanwhile, Eunhyuk was still standing in the living room not moving from his spot by the couch, frozen by what he had heard, what he was seeing in front of his eyes right now. He was looking in the direction of their bedroom, watching Donghae pulling out clothes and throwing them on the bed. He knew what was happening; he just didn’t want to believe it. He couldn’t accept the fact that Donghae was actually packing his stuff and leaving him.

He just stood there, as if not fully grasping the situation even though he did. Eunhyuk just had no idea what to do to stop Donghae; because he wanted to stop him, he needed to stop him.

“Hey, come on, stop with this bull!” he exclaimed loudly, just enough for Donghae to hear him from the other room. “Just put your things back, you can’t move out!” he continued as he walked in the bedroom.

But Donghae didn’t listen. He had made up his mind about it already and there was no way for Eunhyuk to talk him out of it.

Donghae walked right past Eunhyuk and went inside the bathroom with an emotionless expression, not giving Eunhyuk even a quick glance; he had to keep his composure at least until he was out of the apartment, after that he could pity himself all he wanted.

Eunhyuk pursed his lips, deciding that he couldn’t just sit and watch Donghae leave. He made his feet move and followed Donghae to the bathroom. He stopped and leaned on the door frame, deciding that this way Donghae couldn’t avoid him for long; he’d have to leave the small space of the bathroom at some point.

“What are you doing, Hae? Just stop.” he asked with a slightly trembling voice, though he tried his hardest to stay calm. Why the hell are you like that, Hyuk? Man up for ’s sake!

“What does it look like I’m doing?” Donghae snapped back with a cold voice. It was driving Eunhyuk crazy. Donghae wasn’t cold. Donghae was gentle and sweet, Donghae’s face would always lighten up whenever Eunhyuk was there; Donghae never had this emotionless mask adorning his handsome features. And what made Eunhyuk even more upset was the fact that he was the reason Donghae was acting this way.

“Hae, stop..” Eunhyuk tried again, his voice begging for Donghae to leave that toothbrush back in its place and come in the living room to talk this out.

“Don’t call me Hae!” Donghae nearly yelled. He turned in Eunhyuk’s direction and glared at him the best he could manage to. “You don’t deserve to call me that anymore. It’s over now. It’s too late.  Just get out of my way.” He snapped at Eunhyuk. He pushed past him and went back inside the bedroom.

Eunhyuk just stood there dumbfounded. He ran his fingers through his hair, pulling at the soft black locks. He didn’t think he’d ever hear those words come out of Donghae’s mouth.  He looked at his reflection in the mirror in front of him. His whole body filled up with anger threatening to overflow. He was angry not with Donghae for leaving, but with himself. He didn’t even know why he did it. Why did he have to risk everything he had for something so meaningless? ‘Was it worth it?’ He couldn’t help but ask himself. It ing wasn’t. Came the immediate answer. Of course it wasn’t worth it to lose Donghae over some stupid hook up that he wasn’t going to see ever again.  He didn’t deserve someone as good as Donghae.

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Donghae was looking around the bedroom to check if he hasn’t forgotten anything when he heard the sound of something shattering into pieces on the floor. He jumped and ran to where it came from. The sight in front of him, once he entered the bathroom made him stop breathing.

Eunhyuk was standing in front of the broken mirror, sharp pieces lying everywhere; he was supporting himself on the sink with his hands, the right one covered in blood. He was breathing hard but he didn’t lift his head even when he heard Donghae gasp.

“Why the hell did you do that? What were you thinking?” Donghae panicked and hurried to Eunhyuk’s side to see the hand he had punched the mirror with. His vision started blurring and it took everything in him not to start crying. HisThere was so much blood. He held Eunhyuk’s hand with his two trembling ones, examining it, even though that was impossible to do because of the tears threatening to fall on his cheeks.

“You can’t leave. I don’t want you to leave.” Was all Eunhyuk said, still not lifting his head to look at Donghae.

“Well you should’ve thought about that before you messed up.” Donghae tried to sound cold and unwavering but it came out more as a whisper. He blinked back his tears and frowned at Eunhyuk’s hand. Some sharp pieces had cut into his skin and Donghae hurried to take them out which caused for Eunhyuk to hiss in pain.

Eunhyuk opened his mouth to defend himself but then he closed it. He knew Donghae was right. He made a mistake, hell it was way more than one. He had no excuse. He was the biggest walking on this planet and he couldn’t possibly deserve someone as good and as loving as Donghae, but that didn’t change the fact that he still loved him and wanted him to stay.

Donghae the water and put Eunhyuk’s hand under the cold steam to stop the bleeding.

They stayed silent for a few moments, neither of them knowing what to say.

“We can’t fix this. I can’t forgive you.” Donghae suddenly said barely audible. But he sounded calm, as if he had come to terms with this already, as if he has given up. “What did you think? That I didn’t know about the others before that? I’m not stupid Eunhyuk. I just didn’t want to accept it, so I pretended I didn’t know.” He continued, his voice starting to tremble.

Eunhyuk lifted his head and stared at Donghae who was looking down at the floor. His eyes started to sting at Donghae’s words and the tone he used. He sounded devastated. How did he manage to do that to the person he supposedly loved most in this world?

“I’m sorry.” He lifted his undamaged hand and placed it under Donghae’s chin, making him look up at him. Once their eyes met Eunhyuk saw that Donghae was on the verge of crying, his eyes were filling with tears and he suddenly felt like crying himself.

He leaned in expecting to be pushed back by Donghae at any second but he did it anyway. He brushed his lips slightly against Donghae’s, savoring their sweet taste.

When Donghae didn’t respond, nor pushed him away he kissed him fully. He felt Donghae’s wet tears on his cheeks and placed his hands to embrace the younger. He desperately wanted to soothe his pain, to make him feel better and to tell him that it was going to be okay, even though he wasn’t sure about that himself. 

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A/N: I hope this part doesn't disappoint too much. It was more on the angsty side but don't worry IS COMING UP IN THE NEXT PART!! 

So be warned! lol but I'm guessing that's all you erted people are waiting for anyway XDDD

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