"Just hurts me know that you choose him over me so easily, like you didn't care about me anymore or that I wasn't nothing for you anymore."

These words echo in my head and make me feel like a traitor, the worst person in the world. I know I made a lot of promises and I didn’t fulfill them but I can’t do anything, isn’t my fault, I didn’t predict any of this.

He appeared out of nowhere and won my heart, he made ​​me feel wonderful things. He made me feel the happiest person in the world.

Yes, it's true, I fell in love. I fell in love with his smile, his y Busan’s accent, his strange and cute habbit of / biting his lips, his perfect voice, the most beautiful and harmonious voice I had ever heard, his sweet eyes, his comforting embrace, his sweet and calm words.... he made me going crazy because I tried to deny my feelings for him, I was trying to say that I still love you, I tried to pull him out of my thoughts mind, I tried to erase his image of my mind and my heart but it was too late, I, every day that passed, fell in love with him more and more, I couldn’t help but smile intensely when I saw him, I couldn’t stop feeling those butterflies in my stomach every time I was with him, I couldn’t prevent my heart beat stronger for him, I couldn’t help but smile and close my eyes every time he sang for me, I couldn’t help ....... I fell in love with him and now, I’m suffering the consequences.

Every time I see you, every time I look at you, I can see the pain, the disappointment, the heartache, the tears never flowed in your face, hidden behind that mask that you built. I didn’t want to hurt you, I didn’t want to cut our connection, I didn’t want to stop talking to you, I didn’t want that you suffered, I didn’t want to erase our memories, I didn’t want to see you in this state but I couldn’t do nothing ... I didn’t choose to fall in love with him, it was my heart, my heart chose him and I can’t fight with him because he is stronger than me.

After all, I don’t regret it, I don’t regret having chosen him because I know he loves me and he will protect me just as you were doing, I know he won’t let me feel sad, lonely or unhappy, I know he will comfort me when I need it, I know he will make me smile when I'm sad, I know he will help me when I'm tired, I know he'll love me, I know he will try his best to be a good boyfriend.

However, our past wasn’t erased, I didn’t burn any of our memories, I haven’t forgotten you, I haven’t deleted your image of my heart, there wasn’t a day that I don’t think of you, there wasn’t a place where I am and that we have been before that I don’t remember you, I just .... I just don’t love you the same way, not the way that I love him, the most beautiful way in the world.

I just want you to know that I don’t want anything to change….is impossible, isn’t it? I know but I'll give my best to win back our friendship, I will give my best to compensate you for every tear that you shed for me, I won’t give up on you, I won’t let you stay away from me, I won’t leave us to become simple strangers.

"Maybe I'm not enough for you"

There's that feeling again, I feel like bursting into tears when I hear you say those horrible words. I'm the one who didn’t deserve you. You deserved a girl who could take care of you, that love you, that never did you cry, that comforted you when you were sad, that cheer you up, but never ever hurt you and I...I'm not that girl, I just hurt you, I made you cry, I made you feel like a worthless person, I made you to think that I never loved you, I made you feel abandoned. I...I'm the worst person in the world.

"Maybe I'm not worth it"

The moment has arrived, the moment when everything collapsed around me. I didn’t know what to do, I just wanted to fall down and cry, cry until the tears dry, but I couldn’t, I couldn’t show my weak side because I know you would make you feel worst, I know it would hurt you even more, I know that you would you continue to blame you of the end of our relationship but the truth...I am the only guilty of our end…I was the only one guilty.

"Mian…mian…” were the only words that I could say.

I’m the most weak person of the world, I couldn’t even look at you, I couldn’t say that I was suffering too, I couldn’t say that the only guilty of all this was me, I just let you suffer, I just let you continue thinking that you were guilty of everything that was happening, I was cowardly, stupid, but I would compensate you, I'd tell you now but I couldn’t say anything else besides "sorry " or " I didn’t want to hurt you", I couldn’t even look at you, I couldn’t bring myself to you, I couldn’t do anything, I just sat in my chair, not looking at you.

You kept talking, you kept saying things that I thought that were totally stupid and wrong but I did nothing, I didn’t even have the guts to face you, so I wanted to get to tell you all that I've been hiding inside me. Maybe then we could both be happy even with different people, so maybe I wouldn’t feel this endless pain.

At that moment, I couldn’t stand it, I let the tears flow freely upon my face, and slight sobs escaped my lips. Finally, I gained courage and looked at you. Surprised, you were surprised by my reaction. What will he think? It was the only question that crossed my mind at that moment.

"Mian" you murmured as you approach me. I got up and approached you.

"Joon, I...I didn’t want to make you feel that way. You are more than enough for me and I...I'm the one that's not worth it "I said, crying

You didn’t said anything and I looked at you again and, without thinking, I hugged you, which, by your reaction, was surprising. I smiled a little and let me wrap me in your embrace.

"Joon....mian…Jebal.” I said, not looking at you.

"This isn’t your fault, I'm the one that made you go." you said, looking out the window

"Ani, I fell in love with him and…" I said, being interrupted by you

"If I was a good boyfriend, you wouldn’t have looked at another boy" you said, looking at me, "I just wanted you to know how I feel, I didn’t want to hurt you"
You step back and walked slowly to the door. I didn’t move and just follow your steps with my eyes.

"I think the only way is if I go…I don’t want you to be hurt so I’m leaving you, just be happy…I hope we can see each other one day….Saranghae" you said and didn’t let me say a word.

You left the room quickly and I felt my body weakening. Although I love him, I'll never ever stop feeling what I felt for you, I'll never stop thinking about you, I will never forget anything about you, about us, I'll never forget your face and I hope that when we can meet again, maybe then I will be able to face you with a smile on my face.

"Eunmi-ah!" I heard my name being called and looked slowly back. There he was...the man of my dreams, the boy for whom I fell in love deeply. He looked at me with a confused and worried expression and I just smiled a little.

"Daehyun...I hadn’t noticed that you had entered" I said, getting up.

He looked at me and said nothing. I approached my bag and wiped my tears, trying hard to smile because I didn’t want him to see me in that state. Why? Because he would think I was still in love with you, I was afraid he would feel hurt to see me cry for another boy, I was afraid of hurting another person, a person who was very important to me.

Suddenly, he hugged me and rested his head on my shoulder. I smiled slightly and this time wasn’t a fake smile.

"Sssh, don’t cry...I know it hurts." he said in a soft voice, "I know he was important to you and I know it will take until you stay well with that but I'll be here to support you."

I smiled to hear his words and turned slowly. He looked at me and smiled sweetly. I couldn’t resist and kissed him. He pulled me closer and kissed me back.

The boy that you hate so much...is the boy that I love and is the boy that I want to love for the rest of my life

Goodbye, Joon. I'll never forget you.

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Annyeong! I hope you enjoyed this.

Please tell me what you think about this ^^ I'll be very happy (:

Thanks for reading and if you want...read my others fanfics ^_^

<3 you