Ever since Hyukjae was young, people have always been telling him he was too timid to succeed in life.

When Hyukjae was a little boy in preschool, he was never like the other kids in class- always rowdy and boisterous and noisy. He preferred to sit by himself, play with some Lego blocks by himself, and drink his strawberry milk by himself. Even when the other kids came up to him with those big curious eyes and asked whether he wanted to be friends, Hyukjae was never bold enough to say yes.

So throughout his preschool life Hyukjae found himself more or less alone, apart from exchanging a mere word or two with another awkward turtle (no, really) like himself once in a while. His name was Kim Jongwoon and nobody wanted to talk to him because they rendered him weird, for he always lugged his little green turtle to school in favor of the typical action figures and toy guns.

And Hyukjae was slightly comforted by the fact that he wasn't the only one afraid of stepping out of his comfort zone and afraid of making friends, that he wasn't the only one whom the preschool teachers always sighed at hopelessly for drawing the same pond with the same fishes during art class (since Jongwoon only knew how to draw the same old turtle as well).

So Hyukjae didn't really care when the preschool teachers spoke to his parents about how he was too passive and introverted, too unwilling to try new things. Because he figured there was nothing wrong with him, since someone else was just as timid as him.

But then they're into their last year of preschool and there's a new kid in class, and his name is Kim Ryeowook and he's a cute, chubby little fella. He captures Jongwoon's heart with one cheery smile and bit by bit, he's lured Jongwoon out of his shell and Jongwoon's become a happier, brighter kid, and the two are never seen apart from the other.

So Hyukjae's left to himself just like that, all the way through elementary school too, with just his ever present carton of strawberry milk and that drawing of fishies in a pond to keep him company.

-

Hyukjae is into his senior year of high school when girls start to take notice of him. (After all, no matter how introverted or quiet he may be, he isn't bad looking at all.)

But Hyukjae ever only sat with one boy during classes or lunch, and his name was Cho Kyuhyun and he was a computer-addict, always sporting the same geeky glasses and having that same head of messy black hair. So when girls came up to him with batted eyelashes and hopeful smiles Hyukjae never once showed an ounce of reaction.

True, he couldn't deny that some of them were pretty and he was curious of what it would be like to hold a girl's hand, walk into school with her and take her out on weekends. But maybe it was just the way they were so eager to throw themselves at him that Hyukjae couldn't quite understand, or maybe it was because Hyukjae really just didn't like people, or, more specifically, girls.

So it didn't take long before the girls got the hint that Hyukjae wasn't interested. Then the rumors started and it was always something along the lines of don't worry, he's probably gay with that Cho Kyuhyun.

And Hyukjae was afraid that Kyuhyun, the one person he actually considered (well, more or less) a friend, would be just like the rest of them- realize how he was, get bored of him, then leave him out, like how he had always been treated.

But Kyuhyun would just give him that calculative look, clear his throat and speak.

"You're not into people?"

Hyukjae pokes his food before answering in a soft mumble, "I don't know. Maybe I'm just waiting for someone who'll make me feel comfortable."

And Kyuhyun would just nod and leave it at that, and Hyukjae was often grateful for that fact.

But Hyukjae feels like it's just preschool all over again when Kyuhyun ends up stumbling (literally) into Lee Sungmin, one of the school's most esteemed martial artists. And Sungmin, bright and happy boy that he is, takes a rather peculiar liking to Kyuhyun's sarcastic and cold and quiet nature and eventually, Kyuhyun doesn't sit with Hyukjae at lunch anymore.

And it's only on graduation day that Kyuhyun finds Hyukjae in the crowd after successfully disentangling himself from Sungming's grasp and gives him an awkward hug, asking him how he's doing.

Hyukjae doesn't reply, and Kyuhyun sighs, before turning his head slightly to glance over at Sungmin, who's chatting energetically with some of his classmates.

"You know," Kyuhyun pauses for a moment. "We're rather alike, right?"

Hyukjae scoffs, and his voice comes out in a murmur. "I thought we were. But look where we stand now."

Kyuhyun cracks a lopsided grin and glances away, and Hyukjae watches as the younger's expression softens as he looks over at Sungmin.

"I guess all it takes is someone special to change who you once were."

And even though Hyukjae is still a little bitter that Kyuhyun has moved on and left him behind, he can't help but smile as Sungmin comes over, loops an arm through Kyuhyun's and introduces himself to Hyukjae, all the while not knowing that Kyuhyun is gazing at him with the most tender of looks.

Hyukjae promises to keep in contact with the two, not forgetting to nudge Kyuhyun suggestively as he leaves the graduation ceremony.

Maybe one day soon enough- Hyukjae smiles as he looks back one last time and sees Sungmin lace his fingers through Kyuhyun's- I'll find my own happiness too.

-

Hyukjae is 20- a university student- when he first meets Lee Donghae.

He's a major in World History and is dumped with the burden of a mid-term thesis on how World War II shaped the South-East Asian nations as he journeys to the national library downtown to gather some resources. Hyukjae grips on tighter to his backpack as a swarm of students push their way past him to exit the library.

Hyukjae scratches his hair and clears his throat awkwardly, finally getting the attention of the angry-looking man behind the information desk who looks up at him expectantly, albeit impatiently.

Hyukjae shuffles his feet and tries to find his voice. "Um, I was wondering which floor the books on World History are?"

The man grunts and punches some keys on the keypad before answering Hyukjae flatly. "Level seven. Resources."

Hyukjae smiles slightly, relieved. "R-right, okay, thank you," and he's darting up the escalators in the next second.

Hyukjae's at level seven soon enough and he quickly proceeds to find the books he's looking for. He piles a couple of useful ones into his arms and smiles to himself when he finds a whole aisle dedicated to the history of World War II. Hyukjae attempts to step across another student who's deeply analyzing books on the floor but accidentally knocks his arm. The boy's head snaps up to meet Hyukjae's eyes.

Hyukjae gulps at the irritated glare he's getting and rushes out an apology. The boy on the floor rolls his eyes and mutters something under his breath. Hyukjae scurries to the other end of the aisle. He hates confrontations.

Hyukjae lifts a finger to trail along the rows of books, looking for something that'll be useful to him. His eyebrows furrow helplessly when he realizes he might have to go through the books one by one.

Sometimes he honestly wonders why he chose to take World History.

"Hi! Can I help you?"

Hyukjae lets out an uncharacteristically high-pitched squeak and drops all his books.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!"

Hyukjae drops to his knees and scrambles to pick everything up when another pair of hands reaches in to help him.

"I'm really sorry about that. Here," Hyukjae stands and comes face-to-face with a cute boy who looks his age, wearing the most apologetic expression Hyukjae's ever seen. Hyukjae's eyes zero in to the name tag pinned onto his black collared shirt.

Lee Donghae.

Donghae smiles at him, and it's a full-blown smile that shows off his sparkling white teeth and reaches his warm brown eyes. Hyukjae is left momentarily breathless.

"Can I help you with anything? You looked a little lost there," Donghae asks kindly.

Hyukjae feels heat creep up the back of his neck and rubs it shyly. "I'm, uh, looking for books on the effects of World War II." His voice is soft and it falters weakly in the middle, captivated by the sincerity and depth of Donghae's brown orbs.

Donghae smiles brilliantly again and turns to face the shelves, one finger tapping his chin thoughtfully as he hums and scans the endless books. Hyukjae nearly trips over his own feet in his haste to step out of Donghae's way. Donghae chuckles lightly.

"Mmm, this one should be good. I've seen many students loan out this one. Oh! And this one just came in recently. I browsed through it myself. Oh wait! And there's this series... Yep! Right here! My older brother studies History, too. I've seen him using books by this guy enough times to remember," Donghae laughs to himself as he sifts out the books.

Hyukjae stands there, speechless, as Donghae continues on rambling and dumping books onto the ever-growing pile in his arms. Never has he met someone as talkative and lively as Donghae, and Hyukjae normally flees from people like him. Instantly.

But Hyukjae doesn't want Donghae to stop talking, and neither does he want to leave. Maybe it's because Donghae's face reflects so much child-like innocence and eagerness and life and it's got Hyukjae so enchanted. Or maybe it's because the smile on Donghae's face is brighter than the fireworks that explode in the sky on New Year's Day and Hyukjae doesn't want to see the brilliant colors fade.

Either way, Hyukjae giggles to himself when Donghae later reprimands the boy he had previously kicked to find a proper place to sprawl your fat before turning around and sending Hyukjae one final, bright beam.

Hyukjae is pretty sure he'll back at this library soon.

-

Two days later, it's the end of the school week. Hyukjae grabs his things and heads down to the library, determined to get started on his thesis.

He heads straight for level seven and weaves his way into the section dedicated to World History before settling down at a quiet corner near the window and getting to work. He pulls out all his books and his laptop and delves into the story of World War II, eyes scanning the words and fingers typing away at his keypad. He doesn't know how much time has passed when someone slides into the seat opposite him and a cheery voice breaks his concentration.

"Hi! It's you again!"

Hyukjae's fingers slip on the keypad from shock. He glances up and yep; it's Donghae's happy face that greets him across the table. Donghae puffs his right cheek subconsciously and leans over to peek at what Hyukjae is doing. Hyukjae leans back automatically, but either Donghae doesn't care or he doesn't understand the concept of personal space.

"How's the project coming along?" Donghae asks with a grin.

Hyukjae's jaw grows slack. He's talked to Donghae like what, once?, but the other boy is conversing with him now as though they're good old pals.

Donghae's smile falters. "Oh, I'm sorry. Do you- do you remember me? I helped you- "

"Two days ago, to find me some books," Hyukjae finishes with a shy smile. "Yeah, I remember you. Donghae."

The wide grin is back and Hyukjae wonders how Donghae's face hasn't split into two yet.

"And you are...?"

Hyukjae clears his throat quietly. "Uh, Hyukjae. Lee Hyukjae."

Donghae giggles, very much like a little boy who's just gotten away with a childish prank, and outstretches a hand. "It's nice to meet you, Hyukjae."

Hyukjae hesitantly slips his hand into Donghae's, but turns out it's warm and assuring and Hyukjae ends up cracking a small smile. Donghae's one only gets bigger.

"So, when's the project due?" Donghae tries again.

Hyukjae scratches the back of his neck. "Thesis, um, actually. A-at the end of the term," Hyukjae stutters out.

Donghae's eyes light up and Hyukjae stares, starstruck. "Great! So you'll be coming here often, right?"

Hyukjae's eyebrows furrow. "Um, what?"

Donghae sighs despondently and leans his cheek against the palm of his left hand, gazing out the window with his bottom lip protruding out in a slight pout. Hyukjae resists the strange urge to lean forward and pull his cheeks in every possible direction. "As much as I like my job here, sometimes it gets kind of lonely, you know? I mean sure, I see all sorts of people everyday but they're all so temporary, you know what I mean? But you seem like a really nice person and you've been displaying great library etiquette so far so I was hoping we could get to know each other, and since you'll be visiting this place often, then why not, right?"

Hyukjae blinks at the hopeful look Donghae is giving him now and the string of words he's just blabbed out. He knows he could never say no, though. The hurt, disappointed look in Donghae's eyes after would make Hyukjae feel like a mean old man who had just tossed away a little kid's lollipop into the gutter.

Hyukjae nods slowly and Donghae smiles readily for him, that same bright smile as two days ago, excitement written all over his cute adorable chubby little face.

So Hyukjae can't stop his own stupid grin from tugging at his lips as Donghae hurries over to his side, plunks down onto the seat on his right and starts chatting animatedly about himself and his job and his family, the thesis long forgotten, because Hyukjae is beginning to feel that Donghae's going to make him into a much brighter, happier person.

And that's all Hyukjae's wanted from the start.

-