You couldn't stop running. You just ran. Without stopping. Without looking back. Tears streamed down your 

cheeks as you brought a hand up to wipe your tears.

"What is the point of living in this world alone when you're gone? " you mumbled, staggering into your room,

reaching out for the message. 

Reading through the lines of scribbled handwriting, your tears fell and smudged the ink. Black smudges. Perfect 

ending. Raising your 'best friend' you felt it go deep into your wrist. You groaned in both pain and pleasure. 

Everything-forgotten. Blood seeped out as you clenched your fist willing more blood to gush out. 

" Why does it hurt so much?" you whimpered as blood spilt onto the wooden floor of your room before darkness 

engulfed you.

 

Flashback

 

"Happy birthday!" 

This rounds birthday was special. It was the first in the hospital. Daehyun. You vividly remembered the day the 

reports came out. The day you knew he was going to leave you in just 2 weeks. 

 

First day in hospital- Flashback

 

Daehyun groaned as he shifted his body into a more comfortable position. He found himself coughing badly, blood

on his palm that was covering his mouth.

" Hyung! Take it easy," a voice yelled and I heard someone chiding him.

He forced his eyelids open.

" Oh! You're awake!" a voice yelled. 

Daehyun sleepily rubbed his eyes, his eyes widening when he realized it was his best friends.

"Yongguk Hyung???" Daehyun forced out a whisper which followed fits of coughs.

"You're finally awake!" a voice mummured.

"(Your name)?" Daehyun whispered.

You rushed over and flung your arms around him . 

"We better get going," Yongguk whispered sharing you a look before smiling gently.

" Take care of him alright?"

You nodded before starting to scoop your self-made porriadge into a bowl.  Daehyun's eyes started to water upon 

seeing how much you cared about him. He wished he didn't have to leave your side. He wished  he wasn't

diagnosed with lung cancer. He didn't want to leave her alone. He didn't want her to suffer. He wanted to spend

more time with her. To confess to her before he....... Passed on. Before he left this world. He wanted no regrets.

He wanted to die happy, smiling and not sad.

*How should I confess?* Daehyun pondered staring at your every move.

Gingerly pulling himself up only to end up slumping on the soft bed, Daehyun groaned in pain and you spun 

around, helping him up slowly, letting him catch his breath.

"Gwenchanayo??? Pabo. It must hurt..." you glanced at him softly, getting back to the preparation of Daehyun's 

food which you had taken much care in preparing.

"Ani..." Daehyun croaked as he gently gripped your wrist, pulling you to him. 

Your cheeks instantly turned colour.

"Wae Oppa?" you asked, his minty breath hitting your neck, making you shiver.

" Feed me once you're done," Daehyun sighed and you chuckled.

*Of course Jung Daehyun, you pabo, you know I'd definitely do that without being told. I'm still sad you don't return my heart i gave

you willingly.* you thought and slumped into something cuddly. Something warm. Something that made you feel safe. Warmth 

overflowing in you- was the feeling. The feeling of.... The state of bliss. Sighing, you rested and snuggled deeper into the 'cushions',

oblivious  to the fact that Daehyun was embracing you.

*I'm glad she enjoyed this. This could be the last time I hug her. It's all I can do.* Daehyun hugged you tighter, a tear escaping from 

his eyes.

Your POV

Do you believe in love at first sight? Well..... It hurts to know the truth but yes, I feel in love with Daehyun.

 

Second day in hospital- Flashback Daehyun's POV

Time flies. A day nearer. A day nearer to my death. It hurts to face reality. Would you rather live in the path of lies than the truth and 

reality? I have no idea. Part of me desires to live in my world where I kept thinking that I'd live on forever, get married to my dream girl

(you) and have children and live until we dies together. The other part of me wants me to face reality and spent as much time with 

(you) when he can- before he leaves the face of earth. The last part of me wishes that the truth will show. If (you) love me. Because I 

really do.

Your POV 

Should I cry? Should I stay strong in front and cry behind this bold front of me? This isn't the (your name) I used to know. This

isn't the (your name) I used to be! What is wrong with me????? I let my tears silently fall. First death that shook my nerves- my 

parents. The fatal car crash just outside my house. Can you imagine I was only 6 then? I had to fend for myself! I lived off the streets

begging until six really handsome guys helped me- they called themselves the BAP.... I often wonder what that meant.... BAP? Bold 

and powerful? I lived on those three words that made me grow up. But Daehyun.... He changed it all.... Beautiful and pretty.. I'd use to 

Descibe such a fine and handsome man like him. Just talking to him makes my thoughts waver, my knees all jelly, my heart

palpitating. Should I visit him? What if I cry in front of him? What if I blurt out my confession? What if I..... 

* I wanna love you all day

Wanna love you all night

Girl you got me so hot tonight yeah~*

your phone rang. You picked it up. But you dropped it soon after.

" Yeobseyo? Ne, Park (your name) imida. How may I help you?" 

"I'm sorry but we found your close friend unconscious and he isn't breathing normally as before. He only has an hour left. He's waiting

for you, staying strong. So please come to the hospital quickly! For him, please come quickly. Mianhae for the operation didnt go right

and successful. "the voice said.

" BWOH?! DIDN'T YOU SAY HE'D BE FINE? DIDN'T YOU SAY HE WOULD LIVE FOR ANPTHER WEEK? WHY?!" you yelled 

as tears fell. Grabbing you coat, phone and wallet, you ran. 

You ran. You ran for Jung Daehyun, the man who was on his brink of death. Dark clouds started to gather over and the sky became

darker and more ominous. A flash of lightning cracked across the sky and sent you screaming as you ran. You screamed in pain. In

pain because just thinking of losing Daehyun was a nightmare. You screamed in fear. In fear of losing him. In regret, having not 

confessed on how you felt about him. Your heart became an empty hollow as rain started to fall gently.

*Even the clouds are crying with me...* you chuckled bitterly as you fought back more tears to no avail, letting them trickle down your 

pale cheeks.

Finally, the hospital came to view. But you didn't stop running.

You never noticed a red car coming from a distance at high speed until you were flung away. A body lay motionless on the ground 

next to you. Your eyes widened when you brushed the man's side bangs away.

" D-Daehyun?" you whispered hoarsely, tears falling. 

"Don't cry you pa-pabo," he coughed," Ho-ld m-y h....and for the last time. I..... Love...." Daehyun's body slumped onto the groud. 

" Daehyun!!!!!!! Ani!!! Don't leave me alone!" you yelled, holding his hand tightly as you hugged his wet body feeling the rain pelt on 

your body. 

"Why Daehyun? Pabo. You didn't even tell me or complete your sentence. Who... Wh-o do you love," you mummured, hugging his 

cold body tightly when a piece of paper fell onto the roadside. Passers-by were starting to gather and the man who had almost

knocked you down fled the scene already but you couldn't care more or less. All you wanted was your Jung Daehyun to wake up with 

you, eating breakfast together. But everything was gone. Gone because Daehyun left this world. 

**************************************FLASHBACK****************************************ENDS******************************************

Back to now

You felt your life leaving your body slowly as you plunged the blade deeper into your wrist.

You read his message, memorizing ever word for word as you held on to the paper, falling onto the ground- dead.

 

Dear (your name),

                    By the time you have laid your eyes on this letter, I would have been gone, looking down at you. It's really

going to be perfect if you're here with me but please don't do anything silly. Don't end your life because of a lousy man who 

is such a coward. I can't even confess how I feel about you. Remember the day iwe met? The day our gazes were locked 

together for what seemed like an eternity? The day our lips crashed together? I feel up you blushing. I hope you'd still

force a smile for me even if you're crying. I am not the best man who can make you laugh like crazy but I will try my 

best to make you smile. Don't wih you were the one who could get an illness to die. This is not going to be the best letters 

i write but it's the last I'm writing. To you, I love you a lot. I'd always be waiting- waiting for you. For us to be meant

together. Our hearts will always be together forever. Tell my parents- visit them at the cemtary where I'd also be buried 

soon, that I'm sorry for being a failure in life. Tell them I love them and that I am on the way to where they are at. To 

Yongguk hyung, tell him he is the best. Tell him not to cry and mourn over me and ask him to ask the members to forget

me. To Himchan, stay as our naggy ajjuma. To Zelo, stay healthy. I'd miss you the most. Hyung here will try to send

some cherry tomatoes once I'm an angel. To Youngjae  , you kept me from sleeping well! But I'm going to miss you

too.To Jongup, stay awesome and don't bully Zelo anymore. I miss all of you but let me be in the shadows watching you 

always from above.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 8 letters~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3 words~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1 meaning~~~~~~~~~~~~

I LOVE YOU, (your name) 

meet in paradise

Your dearest Daehyun.

A tear fell before darkness engulfed you and you took in a deep breath, shutting your eyes.

 

Happy ever afters don't exist. What is love? Love is something so strong that no one can break. Time is really something scary now.

I fear it. It takes 60 seconds to fall in love, but more than a minute to forget. Do you still dare to follow your heart? Do you still dare to 

love? It hurts.