Jessica closed the bedroom door behind her and stepped out into the hallway. She brushed her hair backwards and tied her long hair up in a ponytail. She daydreamed while tying her hair up and walking towards the kitchen. Her stomach was growling and she hadn’t eaten anything for the past two days. She finally snapped out of her trance and began looking for food, from hunger not appetite. Her mind had many other things to ponder about than the hunger pangs she had right now.

She could guess that she was still in a state of shock, considering how calm she was right now. She was just dropped with another bombshell into her life, devastating everything that she had built over the past decade. It was a tough pill to swallow but she knew she had to nevertheless. She really wanted to scream out loud but she kept her cool. She needed to think through her turbulent emotions. She had to think of the course of actions that she had to do now.

“You were in there a long time.”

“Yeah, I… I didn’t see the time…”

“I didn’t want to disturb you but thankfully you still knew how to stay alive,” Yoona pointed to the microwave, “Taeyeon cooked up some mac and cheese for you. Just turn the microwave on and heat it up.”

“Thanks,” Jessica replied apathetically.

She walked over and twisted the knob, sparking the microwave to life with a light and a hum, watching the plate rotate clockwise inside. There was silence from both of them. Jessica stood and stared at her food being heated up but obviously her mind was in a much darker place.

Yoona, on the other hand, silently drank her bubble tea and looked at Jessica, thinking for her as well. She never felt good after breaking bad news and she certainly felt even worse now since she had to experience the aftermath together. There really was no easy way out of this. Of course, Yoona kept that thought sealed within her own self. She could only hope for after that impending drop in the course to rock-bottom, there finally would be an uphill ride for once.

“Well, Jessica, in case you’re wondering where the rest are, David is in the basement trying to fix our leaking pipe. I sure hope he doesn’t make it worse. Seohyun and Taeyeon are out for a supply run. They should be back within the hour.”

The microwave dinged in readiness.

“Oh,” Jessica opened the door and used the mittens to take her plate out, “That’s good to know.”

“Be careful with that. It’s steaming hot.”

“Huh?”

“Plate. Hot. Dangerous. Understand?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jessica placed the plate on the table opposite Yoona and took off her oven mittens and sat down, “Smells good.”

“It’s comfort food,” Yoona gave a half-smile, “Taeyeon always prepares that when things aren’t going so well. It’s her tell, I guess.”

Jessica begun digging into her carbs and she continued on without pausing. Her famish must have gotten the best of her, even though she could barely enjoy the food at all. She did feel a little better with some food inside her tummy. Slowly, she went on autopilot: scoop up some cheese and shoved it in , chew and swallow. She wasn’t even conscious anymore, so to speak. She dwelled back in her own world. The world slowly faded around her.

“Look… I know how you feel, Jessica. I’m not trying to make you feel better,” Yoona stared at Jessica for a moment, trying to catch her gaze, “Jessica, do you hear me?”

She continued eating, staring to space.

“Jessica!”

“Yeah? Yeah?”

“Listen, like I said, I’m not trying to make you feel better, but I am trying to tell you not to waste the next few hours sulking, okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“When Krystal wakes up, spend time with her. I don’t want you to live a life of regret like I did. Shove everything else behind and just live in the moment with her. She needs you right now,” she sighed, “Make her comfortable, make her happy, do whatever you need to do with her. I know this is a really difficult topic to talk-”

“Look, Yoona, I really don’t feel like talking about this…”

“Alright… I understand…” Yoona nodded, “Just remember this. You still have time.”

***

Jessica sighed.

She stretched and tried to relieve her aching back. The chair just didn’t fit her body and she had spent two days in it, unmoving. She felt like , having barely slept the past few days. She felt weak, but she was conjuring up all of her strength right now. She knew she would crash and burn later on but now was the golden period. She grabbed Krystal’s left hand and intertwined her fingers with the latter’s, gripping it tight. She rested her head on Krystal’s shoulder and closed her eyes. She didn’t want to think. She didn’t want to feel. She was just so tired.

 “Jessica…”

She grunted a little.

“Hey… Jessica… my shoulder’s gone numb…”

Jessica immediately pounced to consciousness.

“Krystal!” Jessica exclaimed and hugged her little sister with all her might, “Oh my god, you’re awake!”

“Ow, ow, ow!” she squealed, “You hug like a Terminator. It hurts!”

Jessica let go and apologised, unable to hold back her smile. She laughed in relief until a tear came down her eye. She combed away the messy fringe off Krystal’s forehead and pushed it behind her ears. She smiled so wide that her lower jaw was going to fall off.

“How are you feeling, sister?” Jessica ran her fingers through Krystal’s hair, “Are you okay…?”

“I’m hungry, for one,” Krystal chuckled, “But it’s a little cold, ain’t it? I’m shivering…”

“You’re running a fever,” Jessica checked her forehead, “Hang on. Let me get you some Panadol.”

She opened the drawers from the table beside and rummaged through the stacks of medication Yoona had prepared just in case. They were all labelled according to their indications. The first stack was labelled ‘Gastrointestinal Upset’, with anti-emetics and anti-diarrhoeal drugs rubber banded together. The second was ‘Infection’, with all kinds of antibiotics of names that Jessica couldn’t even pronounce. There was a heap of strips of tablets and capsules that were irrelevant at the moment. After pushing those aside, Jessica found the anti-pyretic medication that she was looking for.

“Here,” Jessica passed to Krystal and propped her bed up, “Pop two of these into your mouth.”

She grabbed the cup by the bedside table and filled it up with water before passing it to the sick woman. The latter gulped everything down and her dry lips.

“Want some more water?”

“It’s okay, I’m fine, Jess…”

“Tell you what. I’ll prepare you some porridge to eat.”

“Ew, no,” Krystal made a disgusted face, “Porridge!? Gross.”

“You’re not fit to eat anything else, Krystal…”

“People in the death row will just eat whatever they desire before it’s too late.”

Jessica froze speechless, just staring at Krystal in silence.

The latter just replied with a sad smile.

“I know, Jessica. I was conscious when it happened…” Krystal looked away, “It’s inevitable.”

“Krystal…”

“It downright to be honest,” Krystal chuckled quietly, “I am missing a right knee. My left elbow has gone to hell. I know I’m soaked with painkillers right now so I don’t feel a thing but hey… I’m still alive for now…”

“Sister, what happened?” Jessica sat down next to her and held her hands, “Tell me, please.”

“Are you angry at me?”

“Why?”

“I disobeyed you, Jessica,” Krystal looked into her elder sister’s eyes, “I didn’t run off. I waited for more than an hour. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be silly. I’m not angry at you.”

“You should, Jessica,” she shook her head and bit her lips, “I never learn, do I? I never learn until something drastic happens…”

“Don’t say that. Please don’t say that.”

“For what it’s worth, I’m so sorry.”

Jessica immediately gave her sister a long, tight hug. She could feel how frail Krystal was through her grip. She could already guess how bad the prognosis would be. She just refused to accept it.

“You have nothing to apologize for, Krystal,” she shook her head, “Don’t worry about it, okay? I- I just want to know… what happened to you?”

“There’s a guy that came to the caravan, claiming that you sent him. By the time I realised something was amiss, I was too slow. We had a scuffle and I lost. He blew out my limbs,” she look at her leg and hands, “After he incapacitated me, he set our caravan on fire with me watching.”

Jessica’s hands were balled in rage.

“Everything was a blur then but by the time I woke up, I was tied to a tree with a walker feasting on my calf… I couldn’t pry free…”

“Jesus…”

“Where’s Yuri?” she suddenly asked.

Jessica just shook her head and looked down.

“Oh…” Krystal uttered quietly, “I- I see…”

“It was an ambush. Tiffany was never going to help us. She was leading us to slaughter…”

Upon hearing that, Krystal’s lips began to quiver and her eyes slowly became watery. Her face became overwhelmed with sadness and regret.

“I’m so sorry, Jessica, I am so sorry…” she mumbled through her sadness, “I did this! I destroyed everything. It’s all my fault! Everything you said became true and I didn’t listen! I- I argued and- and- I-”

“Stop! You had no fault in this, Krystal.”

“Yuri’s dead because of me, Jessica! Me! She’s dead because I kept insisting on believing a psychopath over my own sister! Oh God…” she covered her face, “I’m so useless! Everything I do, I bring harm to people around me!”

“Krystal, don’t-”

“It’s true! I deserve to die!”

“SHUT UP!” Jessica exploded, “SHUT UP, KRYSTAL! YOU DON’T GET TO SAY LIKE THAT! YOU- you don’t get to say that… do you understand…? You don’t… you- how could you say that…?”

Krystal looked down on her bed, with her tears falling off her chin and wetting her blanket.

“There was no way you could have anticipated this, Krystal. Bad things happen and that’s just life. Not everything is your fault!” Jessica sighed and rubbed her eyes, “Yuri would have died anyway.”

“What do you mean?”

“Even if Novak was the haven that we prayed for and medical attention was given to her, there’s a high chance she would die on the operating table. She has lost too much blood and her organs would have shut down by then. If anyone is to blame, it’s me. I did this to her by suggesting that shortcut. That is my burden, not yours. You only did what you did for our best interest and you don’t get to degrade yourself like this,” Jessica shook her head, “You don’t. You chose to believe the good in people, that makes you the best of the three of us. Nothing is going to change that, Krystal. Nothing.”

Krystal nodded, sniffing away.

“Now,” Jessica stood up and took a deep breath, “You must be starving. Tell me, what do you feel like eating?”

***

“The Ilizarov knee brace is definitely not good looking, but it should keep her walking. I have pumped her full of analgesics that she won’t feel much pain at the moment, but there’s only such much those medications can do without affecting her consciousness.”

“You said I still have time… ”

“You do.”

“How much?”

“Do you really want to know now? Sometimes it’s just better to live and cherish in the moment.”

“I have to know.”

“Fine, if you really must,” she sat down and sipped her tea, “Her condition is deteriorating rapidly. Her fever is uncontrollable. The anti-pyretic is keeping it at safe levels but her temperature is still above normal levels, waiting to erupt. You remember what I mentioned to you back then about the Walker Parasite?”

“Yeah.”

“It has already infiltrated her brain. The spiking fever is the proof. Slowly it will shut down her brain other than parts of which needed to sustain locomotion. The first to go would be conscious cognition.”

“How long?”

“Twenty-four hours.”

Jessica let out a small gasp, followed by a staggered deep breath.

“So little time…?”

“You asked. Look, I suggest keeping it to yourself for the moment. It won’t make Krystal any chirpier.”

Jessica remained silent, looking at Krystal gobbling down her pasta in the dining room.

“You okay, Jessica?”

“It’s doesn’t matter whether I’m okay or not.”

“It does! How will you comfort someone else if you can’t even comfort yourself? Look at yourself, Jessica,” she reprimanded, “You’re so clearly sulking! How will that make her feel?”

“What would you have me do, Yoona?”

“Put on a happy mask. It is not easy, but I know you can do it. You can suffer later.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“It’s 6am now. I suggest doing the deed by midnight today, just to be safe. Once the metamorphosis begins, it will hurt both you and her. She will be paralysed by the pain and it would be excruciating to even watch.”

“How?”

“A bullet to the head.”

“Is there no other options with more dignity?”

“I do not have any euthanizing medications with me. A bullet seems crude but she won’t feel anything. Look,” Yoona put her hand on Jessica’s shoulders, “If you want, I can do it.”

“No,” Jessica shook her head, “She’s my sister. If anyone is to do it, it will be me.”

“Are you sure?”

“Trust me.”

“Alright. You still have some hours left. Make it count.”

Yoona left, leaving Jessica in the kitchen watching Krystal feast in the dining room. Jessica sighed and walked towards Krystal, joining her at the table. The younger sibling ate like a beast, clearing up two portions of pasta. She even walloped ten huge meatballs and kept on going. Yoona just watched in astonishment as her sister was always a small-eater, but now she ate more than the three of them combined.

Krystal let out a loud burp and wiped .

“Satisfied?”

“Yep,” Krystal nodded, “It was great.”

Krystal got to her feet and took her plates to the kitchen. Jessica continued sitting at the table while Krystal brought the dishes for washing. She was mentally planning out the day’s itinerary. They had quite a few hours, but she didn’t want to make it hectic. It was then that she heard plates crashing against the floor into a thousand pieces.

“Krystal?” Jessica jumped to her feet and turned around, seeing Krystal on her knees, “Krystal!”

She immediately rushed to her younger sister.

“Krystal?! Are you okay?”

“I- My head is spinning…” she muttered unsteadily with all four limbs anchoring the floor as though she was going to be blown away, “Help me… I can’t- I can’t see straight…”

“Yoona!” Jessica called out, rubbing Krystal’s back, “YOONA! HELP! PLEASE!”

Then Krystal vomited everything out onto the kitchen floor. She puked and gagged everything she had just eaten, mixed with blood. Her vomitus was bright red in colour and it wasn’t from the tomato sauce. There were blobs of blood clots mixed with fresh blood and Jessica would never forget how fresh blood looked like.

“I- I can’t breathe…” Krystal managed to gurgle before the next round of regurgitation began.

There was even more blood this time and the kitchen floor was slowly turning red as the pool of vomit grew bigger, seeping through the edges and grooves of the white porcelain tiles.

Jessica completely froze. She didn’t know what to do. Her mind went totally blank. All she could do was watch her sister suffocate.

“YOONA!!!”

***

“Are you sure we should be doing this?”

“Yeah. I feel better now.”

“That’s because we gave you anti-emetics,” Jessica rolled her eyes, “The analgesics were making your stomach upset and we pumped more drugs into your system.”

“It doesn’t matter, Jessica. I just have to make it through and live the most of today.”

“Krystal…”

The younger sibling took a deep breath and turned to Jessica, baring a great smile.

“Come on, sister! We’ve got things to do, places to see!”

“Where are we going?” Jessica pushed the leaves aside, wading through the jungle, “You should be at home resting.”

“Sister, please. I’m not going to spend my last moments at home, sitting on a damn couch like a dying person under chemotherapy. No, I want to feel the world one more time!” Krystal chuckled, “You’re the sportier one, Jessica, going rock-climbing and hiking and all! You shouldn’t be complaining, you know.”

“I’m not complaining for me…”

“I know, sister, I know,” she grunted, pulling herself up a hill using a sturdy vine from a dying oak tree, “I’m the one who was always at home playing videogames and watching TV.”

“I’d much rather you do that now.”

“You don’t understand, Jessica,” Krystal muttered melancholically, “I want to do something that I’d usually be afraid to do! This is the time!

“You’re-” Jessica grunted as she swung herself up to the top, “You’re afraid of going out hiking?”

“Yeah… I don’t have the guts to do it alone and I was always afraid that I’d do badly and embarrass myself in front of other people.”

“Why didn’t you tell me, Krystal? I would have taken you hiking, you know that.”

“How could I, Jessica? You were so good at it. You and your fit friends usually attempted championships and competitions for this kind of thing. Heck, you even went to the top of Everest, man! You’re light years ahead of me and you’d be bored to even teach me from the very start.”

The sisters broke through the jungle lines and were out in the streets. Krystal looked left and right, squinting her eyes in confusion, trying to figure out which way to go. She gave a soft sigh of exasperation and rolled out a piece of paper she took out from her pocket. She mumbled to herself, comparing her current location to her waypoint sketch she had just drawn out. She stared at it for a moment and then shamefully realised that she had been looking at it upside down. She quietly flipped it over.

“I saw that.”

“No, you didn’t,” Krystal grumbled.

“Can you even read your own handwriting?” Jessica laughed condescendingly, “Are- are you for real?”

“Stop laughing!” Krystal exploded, “I’m trying!”

“Wanna let me have a look at that?”

“No! I can do it! Let me handle this for once, Jessica.”

“Alright, alright. Where are we headed?”

“You’ll see…”

“Find north, Krystal. That should always be your reference point. North is on your left, by the way. The rising sun is facing us.”

“Yeah… I didn’t write north… But I can make out my drawings!” Krystal looked up and pointed right, “Over there. Let’s go.”

Jessica nodded and followed behind her sister. She kept her hands tight on the shotgun slung around her neck. She had to be the lookout for the two of them. Krystal was never the fighter in the family, and she was much less now. She was in no condition to defend herself, but then again, neither was Jessica. Yoona had just restitched her wounds and they were still raw.

If the world hadn’t ended, Jessica was certain that Yoona would have made a name for herself. She was excellent in what she do. She could make Krystal feel like herself, even if that meant for just a day with a scary amount of medications and an ugly-looking cylindrical brace on her left leg. The fact that Krystal could still be out here hiking spoke enough.

“You’re wrong, Krystal.”

“What’s that?”

“I’d be glad to teach you how to hike. I always wanted to. That’s why I always asked you if you wanna come.”

“But that’s joining your friends, Jessica. I just… I just can’t.”

“What about that one time when mom and dad wanted to take you jungle-trekking? Why didn’t you go, Krystal?”

“Do you still remember that time, though?”

“What do you mean?” she queried her younger sister.

“You were away overseas studying, Jessica. You didn’t know what was happening at home.”

“What happened?” Jessica got her curiosity dialled up suddenly, “What are you talking about?”

“We didn’t want to tell you so we wouldn’t affect your studies. You were studying so hard out there that we just didn’t have the heart to break it to you.”

“Hey,” Jessica stopped in her tracks, “What happened?”

Krystal noticed her sister had stopped walking and she stopped too. She faced her and looked down, biting her top lip, thinking whether or not to tell. Jessica’s looks was immensely insistent and Krystal knew that she didn’t