20
Give Me 120 More Years
. . . . .
Nana awoke calmly. She sat up and felt more than just a couple of tears fall off her face. They landed on her lap as she reached a hand up to touch her cheeks. Her dreams were at it again.
She was really going crazy.
Getting onto her feet she wiped her face clean with her arm and stopped midway in the living room when she heard movement in the kitchen. Poking her head around the divider she felt a sense of curiosity revolve around her.
Onew was in the kitchen with a carton of eggs busy at the stove.
“What are you doing?” Nana asked. “Who asked you to touch my stuff?”
He spun around to look at her surprised.
“I’m not good, but this is all I can do. Scrambled eggs?” he asked.
Nana stared at him and stomped into the kitchen snatching the spatula from him.
“I’m grateful that you stayed, but I don’t need you to do this.” Nana told.
“I want breakfast too. I’m not just making it for you.” he stated grabbing it back.
Speechless at first Nana glanced at the frying pan sitting on the stove. It was awkward, she realized. This man, this person she barely knew, was standing in her kitchen as if it were his own and yet it wasn’t that strange at the same time. The body she was standing in, her present self, might feel awkward but something inside felt a sense of glowing comfort. It was all just so complicated to describe. Her feelings were like this and that.
Breakfast was completed in no time and they were eating quietly. Onew’s scrambled eggs tasted surprisingly bland. While struggling to swallow them Nana wondered if he had put in any salt at all.
. . . . .
Onew hesitantly glanced up at Nana who was sitting across from him. He was unsure if bringing up the topic was appropriate, but ever since he’d brought the proposal up to Min Ah he’d already been set with who he’d bring in for this special broadcast. He was unsure, though, with how she would react.
“Can I ask you something?” Onew asked.
Nana poked at the food on her plate mindlessly and didn’t look up. It was as if she hadn’t heard him at all.
“Nana,” he said then paused wondering why he’d addressed her that way.
It was beginning to feel all too comfortable just sitting there with her that it was making him feel uncomfortable. But alas Nana glanced up at him.
“Uh…” Onew stammered looking slightly away feeling himself burn with awkwardness and embarrassment.
“What?” she asked wondering if she’d missed something he’d said.
“My radio show,” Onew started, “uh…I mean…for my radio segment I’m preparing a special session…”
Without being aware of the fact that Nana was staring at him intently, Nana’s mind was flowing back and forth between seeing them in various scenic spots. From a wide grassland to a heavy dark dune lit up with the evening sun.
Unable to continue Onew turned his face away wondering why his heart was beating so fast and why his body was burning up.
The scenic view disappeared slowly and she found herself staring at his side profile. Finally catching herself amidst all the strange feelings building up in the kitchen Nana sat back in her chair readjusting herself before clearing .
“Sorry, I didn’t catch the rest. What is it about your radio segment?” Nana asked.
“Oh…” Onew slowly turned back but kept his eyes glued to the surface of the tabletop. “I’m preparing a soul mate session…”
Nana felt the corner of her eyes twitch a bit.
“It’s about feeling a sense of familiarity to someone and you feel like you’ve known them since forever…like they were a part of your past. Something like that.” Onew explained. “I was hoping that you’d come on.”
“Why?” Nana asked.
Onew searched his mind for an answer, “Because I feel it’s an interesting topic.”
For a second Nana felt disappointed as if that wasn’t the answer she’d been expecting. Tossing her thoughts aside Nana put the suggestion into serious thought.
“I don’t want to.”
“W…why?” he started even more hesitant than when he’d started the conversation.
He needed her. He wanted her to go on the show. It was something he didn’t want to talk about with anyone else. The show, he wanted it to happen and he wanted it to happen with Nana sitting across from him.
“I just don’t want to,” she stated strongly, “I don’t want to talk about such things.”
Onew couldn’t bring himself to say anything else. Sitting there with her was beginning to overwhelm his unconsciousness strangely with a heavy feel of nostalgia. He could no longer take it.
Half getting up he said, “I’ll wash the dishes.”
“No, don’t,” Nana started and they reached for the dishes on the table at the same moment causing both their hands to bump into each other. And as quickly as they’d touched they withdrew their hands bubbling into immense silence.
For a long moment they stood in their own appropriate spots unable to move, talk, or glance at each other. After a minute they glanced up at each other hesitantly and Nana wondered where this feeling of shyness had come from. Quickly reaching for his dishes Onew headed over to the sink and the water glad to hear the running faucet echo in the silence building between them ever so discreetly.
His heart was pumping so fast.
“What is wrong with me?” he silently asked himself.
. . . . .
Giving up she stood from afar and watched on as Onew slowly scrubbed the dishes in the sink behind the counter that divided the eating table from the stove and sink. Watching his back gave her feelings of longing for something she couldn’t touch; something was farther than far, something that was out of reach.
The view faded and transitioned to the scene of a straw hut where Onew was now drying dishes on an old wooden table. No matter how much she stared she couldn’t see his face. No matter how she tried by stepping to the side just to get a glimpse of his eyes, his nose, his smile, she couldn’t see any of it. The room spun with her and she was always standing at the same angle.
Nana felt her eyes twitch before she realized that she was still standing in the heart of her kitchen.
“Is something wrong?” Onew had turned around.
Nana took a step back and turned her face to the side to look around. She was almost afraid to seriously admit that she was losing her hold on reality.
“Nana?” her name rolled so easily off his tongue.
They were interrupted by the ringing of Onew’s phone, which he’d left on the kitchen table. Nana turned to see the name “Krystal” flashing on the screen.
“Your girlfriend’s calling,” Nana told without emotion.
Onew glanced at the phone and at her slightly without making a move for it. Questions jabbed the back of her mind. Was he purposely avoiding this girl’s call? Or was he worried about something else? Why wasn’t he coming forward to get it?
The phone became silent a few seconds later leaving a silent buzz vibrating throughout the kitchen.
Nana turned back to him, “If you’re done, why don’t you leave.”
Onew was silent.
“Sure,” he said.
He walked pass her slowly almost pausing for a moment and finally headed out. The sound of the door closing made her hear thump with regret. Grabbing onto the head of the chair she pulled it out and sat down. Her shoulders slumped. Even as her heart continued racing she felt so…empty.
Empty.
. . . . .
Once the door closed softly after him Onew paused in his steps and turned his head to look back. He didn’t want to believe it. His instincts nor his feelings. He didn’t want to believe any of it. He wanted to believe that talking to her yesterday about his past was just making him naively feel that way toward her. None of it was true.
He didn’t have feelings for the psychic.
Taking a step forward brought him to another stop when he glanced around the long hallway clearly lit up with the lights in the ceiling. He wondered if the thief would try to take back the dagger.
Nana lived alone. If something happened she wouldn’t be able to defend herself. Onew almost spun back to ring the doorbell but stopped. Seeing that Nana was a little uncomfortable and he feeling the same way, he had no choice but to leave her alone.
She wanted the space to herself and he, as well, wanted his own space.
Turning around he walked the rest of the way downstairs and headed back toward his house.
“Oppa!” Krystal called when he opened the door.
Onew looked up at her almost surprised. He’d forgotten about her.
“Where were you this morning? You weren’t in,” Krystal said, “did you go somewhere?”
“Yea,” Onew replied bluntly.
“I called you, did you not hear your phone?” questioned Krystal.
“No, I didn’t hear it,” he lied then felt his pocket for his phone quickly realizing that he’d left it back at Nana’s apartment.
“I wanted to make you a quick meal,” Krystal explained. “If you have time later, do you want to go out?”
As she spoke, Onew’s ears blocked out her voice and he debated to himself if he should go back to retrieve it. Or should he wait for Nana to bring it to him? Which deal sounded better?
Should he purposely head back to see her?
Purposely…go back?
“Oppa,” Krystal’s voice swung him back into his home. “Did you eat?”
“I already ate.” Onew quickly cut in.
“Where?” Krystal pressed on then went on, “Where’d you eat breakfast? You usually don’t eat out.”
Onew looked around as if the answer would pop out unanimously.
“At a friend’s.” he replied turning away to make his way toward the stairs.
“Oppa, where are you going? Aren’t we going out?”
“We are?” Onew asked wondering if he’d answered her without being aware of it.
Krystal nodded hoping to get him to take her out.
“I have nothing to do. You don’t either.”
“Oh…ok.” Onew answered. “Just let me change.”
When he walked into his room he first sat on his bed throwing yesterday’s event as a rerun in his mind. Though he was glad he’d found Nana in time, he was suddenly aware of the fact that for the first time he’d shared something personal with her that he hadn’t bothered to talk about…ever. His parents’ divorce and how they’d left him…he hadn’t even talked about it to Krystal nor any friends he’d consider close.
Why had he started talking to her? What did Nana do to him that made him feel so close to her? A spell, maybe? Did psychics put spells on people?
He snorted at that thought.
Spells are something witches specialize with, not psychics who specialize with feeling and seeing things with certain visions and so on.
There it was. It was happening again. His heart was beginning to rush and he suddenly remembered the cut he’d received last night. Onew gently placed his hand over the cut he’d received last night. It didn’t hurt quite as much as he had expected it to.
Recalling how drastic Nana had been afterward made him wonder if she’d been afraid for him. Or if she’d only been scared because she could have witnessed him die as she always did in her dreams. Was that the only reason why she hated being near him?
“Oppa!” Krystal’s voice traveled up the stairs.
. . . . .
Nana shut the car door behind her and quickly walked from the lot toward Raina’s café. She couldn’t take it anymore. Being alone with her thoughts.
However, as soon as she started walking she heard it again. That heavy low breathing as if whoever was tailing her was out of breath. The same kind of noise she’d heard while walking alone yesterday.
Feeling her heart race she quickened her steps gripping onto the string of her purse and gulped. The soft steps behind her quickened as well. Finally bringing herself to a stop Nana pulled her hands into small fists before turning around.
No one was behind her. Her eyes darted from left to right before she spun around to take another step, however her feet didn’t budge. Another thought had suddenly popped into her head. It had been something she’d never thought of. Spinning back around she lowered her eyes and of course there it was. The golden shade of her fur was familiar and her tongue which hung out almost from the side of stunned Nana into feeling stupid.
***They're both falling into denial, however, at the same time they're already moving toward each other
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