Your Harmony
The Reason I Love
The song I used in this chapter is Sorry by Wonder Girls ^^
And I'm sure I made mistakes, I'm just too lazy to fix them right now. Mian.
Xiumin soon realized he detested the sound of the airplane taking over and even more of crying toddlers kicking his chair as he threw a tantrum. He closed his eyes and tried to tune out the sound around him, as if he could hear nothing at all, but if anything, the sound became louder.
.
.
"Kris?" Xiumin spoke his name in a hushed tone, as if it were a little secret kept away.
"X-Xiumin? Is that you?" Kris sounded as if he were about to burst into tears, his voice thick and deeper than a vast sea. Hearing him for the first time, Xiumin felt his throat clench, it made him so happy.
"Y-Yeah, it's me. I can h-hear you. Loud and clear." Kris took a deep breath and turned to look towards the hallway. He walked further away, opening the door to his apartment and stepping outside.
"You got the s-surgery?"
"Yeah. About e-eight months ago."
"So why haven't you come back? Do you l-like it there?"
"K-Kris," Xiumin stammered, finally getting all of this pain off his chest, "I'm scare. I'm on a plane right now, all b-by myself, and I'm scared. I'm scared that Chen will h-hate me. I'm scared when I get there, I-I'll have nowhere to go. I'm scared."
"Min, don't be. You'll have a home here with me, I'll always be there. And Chen, he could never hate you. He misses you so much Xiumin, you of all people should know that. He just wants to be with you." It still struck Xiumin that Kris' voice was so deep and full.
"Xiumin!" It was a sort of growl mixed with pain, Chen's voice wavering as he spoke the two syllables of Xiumin's voice.
"C-Chen," Xiumin forced out, before the phone line went dead, Xiumin's phone dying moments later. Xiumin pulled back, horror struck, and looked at his phone with anger and anguish.
"You stupid phone," He uttered, having the urge to throw the phone out the wind and destroy it as he had destroyed the last. What if Chen thinks I hung up on accident? W-What if he thinks I don't want to talk to him? Xiumin hung his head and sighed. I'll fix everything once I'm . . . Home. Xiumin liked the thought. He liked to think of how much he'd get to caress Chen's cheek once he was back in his arms, how he would hold him close and never let go, even if Chen needed to use the bathroom. Xiumin closed his eyes as the plane quieted, most asleep, the child behind him in the bathroom with his mother, and the seat beside him thankfully vacant, and thought back to one of his good, fuzzy inducing memories to help lull him to sleep.
"The house was empty besides the two, no Kris to interrupt their moment, no Tao to accidentally pry into their alone time. Xiumin reddened as Chen suddenly turned his head to catch his eyes. There was something off about the way Chen peered down at him, a dark mist shadowing the intense brown of his orbs, a feeling Xiumin couldn't decipher because it was his first time seeing it. He felt comparable to a piece of meat or cattle and Chen happened to be the starved wolf searching for the juciest of the bunch and finding him. The dark haired boy moved in slowly, but to Xiumin it seemed too fast.
He didn't move away from the unsettling situation quick enough and his lips were covered by a new, powerful pair in a slow kiss of wandering tongues and built up desire. Beneath the covers Chen rolled them in an equally slow pace, lips still working against one another, carefully placing Xiumin beneath him and pulling away to stare him down as he used his arms as leverage to keep afloat. Xiumin's face was fluffed and pinkening quickly, the pretty color spreading to consume his entire face and smooth looking neck. He felt his stomach quiver from the look swimming in his lover's eyes, there was so much love in them that Xiumin had the urge to cry.
"I love you," Chen mouthed, before lowering his head and connecting their lightly bruised lips back together. Xiumin embraced Chen closely by the neck, their lips molding together, becoming bruised and swollen as Chen tugged away at his sensitive lower lip. Moments like these were special, kisses they would never forget. Xiumin hummed unconsciously when Chen's fingers pressed against the bare flesh of his stomach; he has no idea what he's doing or if this is the right time, but he doesn't care. He's with Chen and that is all that matters. Chen's fingers are warm against Xiumin's cool skin, the contact of his digits touching flesh causing the older of the two to gasp. With the given opportunity, Chen delved his tongue into the open mouth, his muscles tensing completely as he fought a losing battle for control.
His mouth tasted of potent poison, of polished wine.
He wanted more, but he didn't want to rush things when he had finally gotten the courage to do this, to try. Kissing soon became painful and Chen pulled away to cast his eyes upon that soft, unblemished neck. He wanted to kiss it all over and leave his mark in the form of deep red bites; he wanted to smother the skin with his lips and watch the pink spread. So he did, kissing along Xiumin's jaw and giving special attention to puckered skin there before trailing to older's neck. He kissed the skin slowly, sometimes pulling with his teeth and other times painting the warm flesh with his tongue.
"C-Chen," Xiumin whispered lowly as he panted, speaking unconsciously, every single fiber of his being alive and shaking. He brushed his fingers through Chen's messy locks as the boy bit into his neck again and again, on the skin until he was satisfied with the marks left behind. He pulled away and smiled at his handiwork, brushing his hand across Xiumin's naval and smiling as the boy in his arms trembled and turned red.
"You're so beautiful." Xiumin smiled through his dreamy haze and pulled Chen back to his lips. Holding his weight up by himself had become tiring so Chen gently pressed his body against his little lover, pushing them both into the bed. Am I sure about this, they both thought, shouldn't we stop? The choice was anonymous. The doorknob turned slowly and neither noticed as they kissed again.
"Hey Min-WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!? CHEN! I'LL KILL YOU!"
Needless to say, Xiumin was not allowed to be alone with Chen anymore."
"Wait," Kris started. Chen paused mid-step.
"Soo, come on~" Kyungsoo shook his head, his eyes wideset with fear and his arms tightly grasping onto the door, refusing to be pulled inside.
"I don't think I trust you right now!" Kai opened his mouth to respond in a plea, when he caught sight of Chen and stopped trying to tug Kyungsoo's hands from the doorknob.
"HEY 40 OUNCE!" Chen groaned as the noise vibrated his inner ear and stepped up the driveway and passed Kai's car. Kyungsoo slipped away and ran for the boy, wrapping an arm around Chen's waist to help him inside. Kai crossed his arms and turned his head away from the sight, fighting the urge to kick Chen out and lock Kyungsoo someone far away.
"Did Kris take you home?" Kyungsoo asked as he busied himself with preparing tea.
"No, he was nice enough to let me stay at his apartment. That stupid ," Chen muttered in reply, focusing on the piano sitting off to the side.
"Have you ever thought of maybe forgiving him? I understand that he kept something really big a secret, but maybe he was in a compromising situation seeing as your his bestfriend and Xiumin is his cousin. Xiumin. Chen flinched as he remembered what he had heard.
"It doesn't matter. I heard Kris talking on the phone with him this morning, he's coming back." Restating had sent Chen's heart into hysterics, beating harshly against his chest and making his palms become moist with sweat.
"How do you feel about that? Are you . . . Happy?" Truth be told, Chen had felt a bubble of tension burst inside of him as soon as he heard the words, as soon as his mind comprehended the fact that Xiumin would be here again, within reach, he had felt the happiness of long ago flood him to his very marrow filled bones. Chen had been waiting and waiting for this, eight months of loneliness hanging over his head, of days where he couldn't make it out of bed due to the pain eating away at his body. Chen felt a painful shiver rip through his body, thinking of how patient he had been. He had hoped for something, an email, a letter, long distance phone call, but when he received none, his heart broke.
"I don't know," chen replied with a confused tone. He wasn't sure that he was strong enough to see Xiumin again, he felt disgusting and imperfect and downright ugly. Xiumin didn't have to come back and be with me, Chen thought, he's probably even more perfect than the last time we were together. What do I want?
You still want him.
But why? Why do I want him so badly after what he did to me. Am I addicted to the pain he brings to my chest now? Do I crave for it? He wasn't there, the one night that meant so much to me. How do I know that won't happen again? Chen was indecisive with his emotions, but he then he thought.
"I could see him once, just one more time, and it will be enough to decide."
Kyungsoo exited the kitchen and gently placed the steaming cup of mint tea into Chen's hands. He had seen the change in Chen firsthand, along with Luhan, Baekhyun, and Lay. Singing without Chen, that empty stool sitting between Lay and himself, it tore them apart. They just wanted their best friend back.
Xiumin took a deep breath and gathered his suitcases as the rest of the passengers exited the plane. After a few hours of intense sleep, the child behind him finally calming down enough for him to do so, Xiumin had awoken to a landed plane and the captain's words of goodbye. He followed after an elderly couple and off into the terminal. Since his phone was dead and it was around 4 AM, Xiumin had absolutely no way to call Kris just yet. He walked over to a bench near an outlet and plugged his phone in to charge. He sat with his back straight and his eyes looking around to take everything in. He was here, Korea, home, where Chen was. The entire flight he had been panicking over the talk that never happened; he felt flustered as soon as he remembered Chen's voice. It was so perfect, so amazing, so Chen. Xiumin felt his knees bounce in anticipation as he thought of what to do first. Go home to Tao and Kris, or find Chen. He shifted his gaze to his bags and
pouted.
"If Chen is mad, then he might not let me stay, but Kris and Tao are probably way too comfortable to let me stay there too." What should I do? His iPhone suddenly blinked and raced back to the main screen, where he had 3 missed call and a text message. The message was from Sungyeol.
From: YeolLovesMyung
To: Xiuminnie
"It's nice to see you made your choice. Tell my bro I'll be visiting all of you very soon and he still owes me $20! And find your Chennie or whatever his name was, I want you to happy the next time we meet. It was nice having you, and I love you very much. :)" Xiumin smiled at the message and slowly formed his own text slowly. He and Sungyeol had grown a lot closer, and Xiumin had come to appreciate him just as much as his older brother Kris.
From: Xiuminnie
To: YeolLovesMyung
"You helped me make my choice Yeol, and for that I am so thankful. I now have the courage to face CHEN and I will do everything I have to for us to be together again. And when you come, you should bring Myungsoo! XD Kris will freak out when he sees how mushy you two are. Thankyou for giving me a place to stay!" Xiumin pressed send and brushed his bangs from out of his eyes, the cold air radiating through the airport reminding him of America. After approximately fifteen minutes, Xiumin unplugged his phone and shoved the charger into one of the compartments of his main suitecase. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, allowing the air to raise his lungs fully, before exhaling and pressing the green icon for call.
"Min?" Kris' voice sounded low and slow, much like a slug. Is that what he sounds like when he's tired? Xiumin liked the sound, it was new.
"Yeah, it's me. Can you come and get me?"
"Mhm. I'll be there in half an hour." After hanging up, Xiumin felt his stomach quiver, indicating hunger. He ignored it per usual and wrung his fingers together as something to do. And then he smiled, Chen thought he played with his fingers too much.
"Stop that." Xiumin looked down from Chen pouting to see his connected fingers, realizing that he had unconsciously pressed them together again as he tried to calm his nerves. After the incident with Kris, Xiumin had been feeling shy towards his raven haired lover, still trying to come to terms with what had happened between them. This can't be happening, I wouldve totally been the girl! Xiumin was completely mortified.
"I can't help it," Xiumin murmured, rubbing his small knuckles together,"You shouldn't be here. Kris might kill you or something to that extent." Chen scoffed and placed a hand in his little baozi's hair, gently rubbing behind his ear to make the small male shiver. With his other hand, he tugged at Xiumin's fingers, trying to make the pale boy stop wringing his hands together.
"Your hands are too pretty," He said, holding onto one of Xiumin's hands to make the boy stop fidgeting.
"Nuh uh," Xiumin protested,"they're small." Xiumin unconsciously scrunched up his nose in distaste as he stared down at their hands, how small his was in comparison to Chen's. Its not fair, he whined internally.
"They're perfect, just like the rest of you. But stop making them all wrinkly." Xiumin read his lips and felt his chest shake with laughter.
"Wrinkly?"
"Yes, wrinkly! Stop panicking over nothing."
Stop panicking over nothing.
Xiumin decided to take the advice and relax against Chen's side. For that moment, he was content, not even Kris could intimidate him.
"Flight 509 for America leaving in 10." Xiumin was broken from his reverie by the woman's robotic voice and stood up to stretch. The airport had become full to the brim at the early morn, mostly heading overseas or cross country. Families stood close together so as not to become lost in the horde of human bodies, small children finding perches atop their parents shoulders or in their arms. It would be hard for Kris to find him in these deadly waters, Xiumin realized, and he pocketed his phone before taking a hold of his suitcases. Taking one last look around, Xiumin began his trek directly into the people, dodging here and there, feeling like Nemo from that movie Sungyeol forced him to watch. He pulled his rolling bags along until he was sure he was positively lost.
There was another announcement for a flight arriving in from Singapore just as Xiumin found another bench by a gift shop, little music notes decorating all along the glass windows and swimming across the carpeted flooring. Sectioned off behind the wide scale window were highlighted cds from different companies, mainly one called SM to the right, JYP in the middle, and YG sectioned to the left. Music I can actually understand. No matter how much Sungyeol taught him, Xiumin had never been able to understand any of the English words blasting to a beat in his ear. He had no idea what the hell swag was and why Sungyeol kept doing that same stupid dance called the catdaddy. But maybe it was just Sungyeol. He could be pretty stupid. Music began to waft to Xiumin's perfectly tuned ears and due to his memory of reading lips, he could easily pick up on the words being sung. It was a girl group, singing of ended love, of being sorry.
"I was the one who coldly left you, saying that it’s the end
But these days, I think of you, who only loved me," Xiumin hated the literal irony. He had never thought of Chen so much in a single day such as this, in America he tried his hardest not to. It was always in his dreams where he met that silent regret, that posing terror, the fear of being with Chen. The hadn't been together as long as most people, but time didn't matter when it comes to love. They could;ve been together for one day and Xiumin still wouldve fallen as hard as he did. It almost seemed inevitable.
"I shouldn’t call you because you’ll be shaken again
I try to promise myself but it’s no use
Without knowing, I look for you again," I did try to promise myself we were over. I did say I would stop thinking about you. I did all of this fighting over you, but it never worked. I've been an idiot.
"Baby I’m sorry,
I think I’ll hurt you again
Baby I’m sorry
After seeing you, I think I’m getting a bad heart," I am sorry, more sorry than I'll ever let you know. I don't want to hurt anymore. I don't want to hurt you anymore. Xiumin listened to the song with a weary heart; outside the world had rotated from calm and serene to an abrupt storm brewed by nature. Rain fell in torrents, wetting virtually every aspect of the airport and people moving in, out, and around the building. Xiumin could hear the drops pitter patter against the window; it sounded sad, as if the sky were crying.
"I still want to hear that you love me
I still don’t know myself too
Baby I’m sorry," Xiumin pictured the day he left, how angry he felt the entire plane ride with that child crying in his ears, how angry he felt when he had to run to the bathroom and puke from the turbulence. That was the worst day of his life. Chen had been there for him, when hadn't. He had cared about their relationship enough to ask Xiumin to stay or take him along.
"We can’t go back to the times when you loved me but
I can’t stand you forgetting me
Can we try again?
Can we love agai-" Xiumin tore himself away from the song to shove his hand in his back pocket and pull forth his phone, Kris' number blinking insistently.
"Where are you?" Kris' voice sounded well rested and full of worry?
"I sort of got lost, this place is bigger than I thought. But I'm by a music store."
"How descriptive of you. You do know there's a lot of music stores in here right? What's in the window?" Xiumin looked back and scanned the music store window.
"SM, YG, and JYP are in the displays and a highlight on a group called EXO."
"Okay, I'll be there right about . . . Now." Xiumin turned and saw the blond in the mob of brunettes, easily towering over half the population and looking much like a giant. Xiumin shoved his phone into his sweater, call still in progress, and stood. He smiled as a dark haired boy suddenly cut in front of Kris and rushed him, taking him in a tight embrace.
"XIUMIN! YOU'RE BACK!!" Tao shook the older harshly by his torso, smothering his cheek in kisses and rubbing his cheek against the plush pair.
"I can hear now, you don't have to yell," Xiumin joked, only to be pushed away.
"That's not funny! You-You!" The atmosphere changed drastically when Tao began to sob, pulling a surprised Xiumin back into his arms so he could cry. Kris gave an amused smile as Xiumin stared at him with panic swimming in his eyes.
"Uh, there, there." Xiumin patted Tao's back and head simultaneously.
"Tao, stop being so dramatic, just an hour ago you said you were going to kick his ."
"W-Well that was before!" Kris walked over and past the hugging and awkwardly hugged to take Xiumin's bags. "Come on you two, I'd like to drop Min off and go back to sleep." Tao pulled away from the hug and wiped away his tears with both of his hands.
"Sorry, I-I just missed you. M-Much more than Kris!"
"He's lying!"
~
Later on, after becoming drenched to the bone in cold water droplets, Xiumin realized Kris had said the words 'drop off' which indicated Xiumin would not be staying with them at their apartment.
"Uh, where are we going?" Xiumin questioned as Kris drop through the rain with the windshield wipers at constant work.
"Well, Tao and I are going back to our apartment. You're going to Chen's house. Its pouring rain, you'll be shivering and look completely pitiful, it's the perfect setting."
"Tao, has he gotten into your chick flick collection again!?" Tao sighed and hung his head.
"I came home to him watching the Notebook on rewind. I knew it was a bad idea leaving it out in the open."
/
"Why me?"
Sorry even if it’ll give you a scar again
But I still need your love
How can I live without you?
Okay, so I've decided I am adding to the last chapter, but not really '' if you understand what I mean. It will definitely be fluffy ! ^^ So please look forward to it. Bye guys !
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