Chapter 18: Sleepover.

I dialed Changbum’s number while I was trying to calm down breathing deeply and stopping my tears to fall down.

“Yeoboseyo?” Changbum answered the phone.

“Changbum, can you please come?” I sobbed.

“Sumi, what’s wrong? Where are you? Are you crying?” his voice sounded worried.

“I’ll send you the address by text message. But please come here. I need to see you”

“Are you ok?”

“No, I’m not. That’s why I need you to come”

“Just send me the address. I’ll be there in some minutes. Wait for me, ok?”

“Ok”

I sent him the address and sat down on the sidewalk. I heard Youngmin’s voice and hid from him. He was apparently looking for me but I didn’t want him to see me crying and weak.

“Piggy! Piggy where are you? Let me take you home. Piggy!” he screamed.

I hid behind a tree watching him from the distance. His cellphone rang and he immediately answered.

“Ji Eun-ah, I can’t go now. I can’t find Sumi. I’ll come back after I take her home” I hate the way he’s so nice with her. “What? She called you and said her manager would pick her up?”

I never said that! She’s a liar. She’s the one that wants me to stay away from Youngmin.

“Yeah, I know. She must be mad at me. I think my words were too harsh. I feel bad about it Ji Eun… I never wanted to hurt her. I just wanted to clear the things between the both of us, but my words weren’t the right ones” he sighed.

He feels bad? What about me? He just feels guilty now. Maybe his words weren’t the right ones, but it doesn’t even matter when the meaning is the same. He doesn’t feel the same… and that hurts. No matter if he says it in a kind or in a harsh way, it still hurts.

“In that case, I’m coming back” Youngmin came back into the hospital.

I buried my head on my knees and sighed deeply. In that moment, I just wanted to disappear, to be invisible. The time passed by and the breeze of the night was making me shiver.

“Sumi!” I heard Changbum’s voice. I raised my head and looked at my cute best friend.

“Bummie!” I smiled weakly at him and hugged him tight. I cried on his shoulder wetting his shirt.

“What happened?” he hugged me back. “Why are you crying?”

“Because I’m so stupid. That’s why I’m crying”

“Sumi don’t say that. You’re not stupid” He looked me in the eyes and removed my tears with his thumbs.

“I am. I knew I shouldn’t fall for his stupid charms. I should have stopped it when I could…” I sobbed.

“What are you talking about? Did you and Youngmin have a fight?” he asked me worried.

“Changbum… I… I need to tell you something” I muttered. “But please promise me you will keep this secret. You can’t tell anybody, not even your closest friends”.

“I promise” Changbum gave me his sincerest smile.

“Youngmin and I are not really dating. We’re just together because of a contract we signed and now we have to act as if we’re really a couple, but we aren’t.” I sobbed.

Changbum was startled, like if he couldn’t believe what I said. He sat down next to me on the sidewalk and looked away.

“Why don’t you say anything?”

“What do you want me to say? That I was fooled by my best friend?” He looked upset.

“I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you before. Actually, it’s supposed that I shouldn’t have told you but I need to talk about this with someone. I can’t stand it anymore.”

“I’m your best friend Sumi. You know I wouldn’t tell anyone. Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“It’s on the contract to keep it secret. But Youngmin broke that rule, so I don’t care to keep this secret anymore; at least not with you. I trust you and I know you won’t tell anyone” I looked down.

“I won’t. You can trust me.” he put his arm around my shoulder and rubbed it with his hand. “Now, will you tell me why were you crying?” He raised an eyebrow.

“I like Youngmin. I never thought I would, but it just happened. Youngmin, on the other way, he likes someone else and he left me that very clear tonight”

“So… you really fell for him. It’s just curious, you know? I still remember when you used to hate him so badly” he chuckled.

“Yeah, everything was better at that time” I smiled slightly. “What happened? When did the things change? I always knew he was a jerk. How did I end like this? I’m so pathetic”

 “You’re not pathetic Sumi. You’re just one of the many girls that fall for Youngmin”

“You’re not helping” I dried my tears with the sleeve of my sweater.

“Sumi, no offense but Youngmin is such a jerk. He’s not worth it. You are an amazing girl that deserves someone way better than him”.

“I know. The worst is that I know it. But I can’t stop feeling this. I just wish I could. If I could just rip this feeling out of my heart, if I could just take him out of my mind. I would do anything to change what I feel for him” I buried my head on my knees and bit my bottom lip holding back my tears. “It’s not that easy…”

Changbum put his jacket around my shoulders and hugged me tightly. We stayed there for a moment until I calmed down.

“I wish I could give you some advices but I don’t know anything about love” Changbum shrugged.

“Me neither” I chuckled.

“It’s late. I’ll take you home”. He stood up and extended me his hand. I took it and stood up.

“I don’t want to go home” I pouted.

“Sumi, it’s very late and tomorrow we have to be early at school. Where do you want to go?” Changbum scratched his head puzzled.

“How about a sleepover at your home? It’s been a long since we don’t have one”

“That would be great. I’ll call my manager and tell him that I’ll stay home for tonight” he smiled. For an unknown reason my heart calmed after I saw that big and warm smile.

“I’ll tell my manager I’ll stay at a friend’s house for homework. Of course I won’t tell him it’s you because he’d freak out”

We took a taxi and went to Changbum’s house. His mom greeted us excitedly. I guessed she hadn’t seen him in a while since he debuted.

“Changbum!” she hugged and kissed her son lovely. “Oh! Sumi, I’m so glad to see you. How are you?”

“I’m fine.” I smiled. “It’s been a long since I don’t come here”

“Yes. I’ll make you something for dinner. You must be hungry”

“We already had dinner. We went for a burger to Mc Donald’s” Changbum told his mother.

“Mc Donald’s? How many times will I have to tell you to stop eating junk food? It’s not healthy at all”

“Yeah, but it’s delicious, Umma”. He squeezed his mother’s arm like a little kid. I chuckled.

 “Can we have a sleepover?” he asked.

“Ok. But your room’s door has to stay opened. I’ll be watching you both” Changbum’s mom pointed his eye.

“Umma, you know Sumi and I are just good friends. Even then, we’ll leave the door opened”

Changbum and I went to his bedroom. I sat on the mattress that was on the floor. I stretched my legs and rested my back on the wall.

“So, what do you want to do?” Changbum came back from the bathroom after changing into his pajamas.

“Mm… what about playing truth or dare?” I smirked.

“That’s a good idea” He took his Sponge Bob plush and sat beside me.

“I start. Truth or dare?”

“Truth” Changbum nodded his head cutely.

“What did you think the first time you saw me?” I asked.

“Mmm… that you were very cute”

“Yah! Changbum I’m talking seriously. What did you think?”

“I’m talking serious too. I thought you were such a cute girl”.

“Why would I look cute when I was dressed as a boy?”

“Maybe your clothes were masculine, but the way you acted so shy and clumsy was very cute” He played with his fingers.

“You’re making me blush” I giggled.

“It’s the truth” Changbum looked up biting his bottom lip. “Truth or dare?” he continued.

“Dare. I’m not in the right mood for telling secrets”

“Ok. You’ll call Krystal and ask her where she made her plastic surgery because you want a nose like hers” He handed me his phone.

“Bummie! That’s embarrassing! I won’t ever do that. You know I hate her” I whined.

“You chose dare. So you have to do it”. He made a mischievous smile.

“Ok”. I sighed. He dialed Krystal’s number and gave me the phone.

“Hi Krystal! It’s Taylor of Kpop Queens.” I tried to sound friendly. “I’d like to ask you something… Could you please tell me the name of the clinic where you made your nose surgery? It’s just that I’d like to have a nose just like yours. It’s very pretty” My voice sounded a little high-pitched. That always happens when I lie.

“I haven’t had nose surgery. My beauty is purely natural. So don’t ever try to call me again” she sounded furious and hung up.

“What did she tell you?” Changbum asked curiously.

“She said her beauty was purely natural” I imitated her voice.

“Sure!” He laughed out loud. I laughed too.

“Ok. Now, it’s my turn to ask. Truth or dare?” I said.

“Mmm... truth” he said confident.

“What do you fear the most?” I asked after thinking my question cautiously.

“Losing the people I love, I guess. My friends and family, they’re everything to me.” He shrugged. “Or anyone of you getting hurt. That’s what I fear the most”

An awkward silence filled the room. I gulped feeling his hand brushing mine delicately. He knew I was hurt and apparently that made him feel hurt too.

“So, truth or dare?” he broke the silence.

“Truth. I don’t want more embarrassing calls” I chuckled.

“Why did you change so drastically?”

“What do you mean?” I tilted my head not understanding his question.

“Well, I remember that before you debuted you weren’t a tomboy but then you changed from all of a sudden”

“You remember me? Before debuting?” I raised my eyebrows surprised.

“Yes, at school. So, did your company force you to become a tomboy? I know the question might be a little awkward but I still wonder about that”

“Yes. My company actually did that. But no one had noticed about that till now” I chuckled.

“Why did you do it? Why did you become in someone you’re not?” he seemed confused.

“Have you ever felt lonely? I lost my parents when I was very young. I went to America to live with my aunt but she treated me like a maid. So, I always wanted to be a rapper, to express my feelings through raps. I came back to Korea alone and used to live in a little room. Debuting as an idol was so important to me. It didn’t only mean making my dream come true but also meant finally being part of a family. Those girls are my family; they’re the sisters I always wanted to have.  So, I wouldn’t care if I had to make some sacrifices for doing it, as long as I found a home, it was worth it” I rested my chin on my knees and sighed.

“You’re the strongest girl I’ve ever met” Changbum looked me in the eyes. “Let’s sleep. It’s late”

I stood up and went to Changbum’s bed. Changbum was going to sleep on the mattress. I took my cellphone and my eyes widened. I had 8 missed calls from Youngmin and 4 messages.

‘Piggy, where are you?’

‘Yah! Answer me. Your manager told me you were at your friend’s house. Are you okay?’

‘Mushroom answer me now! I’ll kill you for ignoring me!’

‘I’m sorry’

A tear rolled down my cheek. What was I going to do? I fell for him and told Changbum about it. That meant the contract was over… but even when he didn’t feel the same, I didn’t want to leave him.