Chapter 16

Awkward

 

 

Chanyeol doesn’t show up to school the next day. The fact that he’s never missed a day of school in his life makes the guilt in Baekhyun’s stomach multiply tenfold. He sort of wishes he hadn’t come today either, but there’s a long list of people that will kick his if he misses another day; his mother, homeroom teacher, and principle just to name a few.

He hasn’t slept. Kai, the good friend that he is, stayed up with him through the night to help him with his ‘Get Chanyeol to Forgive Me… Maybe’ plan. It’s not foolproof, far from it, but he hopes it might get his best friend to at least consider forgiving him.

Kai has hijacked his older brother’s car, risking life and limb just to help Baekhyun out with his disaster of a plan that might not even work. Baekhyun vows to pay him back, somehow… but he’s not really sure how.

School goes by terribly slow. Everyone is talking about the fight which Baekhyun can only assume means Chanyeol’s one ill-aimed punch towards Jonghyun’s face. Much to Baekhyun’s dismay, Jonghyun’s a bit tougher than he thought. He walks through the hallway, Kibum attached to his side, the nice purple bruise on his cheekbone on display for everyone to see.

The incident has Chanyeol’s name flittering throughout the halls. Before, despite his large stature, boisterous voice, and the fact that he single-handedly got their school the first place medal at the science fair last year, he was no one, practically invisible. He has to hand it to Jonghyun though. People are throwing accusations at Chanyeol left and right, jeers and insults and not very nice names flying all around. Baekhyun wants to punch them all in the face, but then he realizes he’s just as bad as they are. Or at least… he was. Jonghyun though… he brushes them all off, telling them that it was just a misunderstanding. Baekhyun feels gratitude invade his body and even though they don’t say anything to each other, he makes sure to send Jonghyun a sincerely thankful smile when they’re awkwardly seated next to each other in choir.

Once the final bell rings, Baekhyun busts out the door in true High School Musical style. He makes a beeline for Kai’s hyung’s rusty old car, which isn’t easy considering he’s carrying Chanyeol’s assignments along with his own. Who would’ve thought that an astrophysics book would weigh so ing much.

As they’re making the short drive towards Chanyeol’s house, Baekhyun can’t help but fidget restlessly in his seat.

“Can you go faster, please,” he mumbles, seriously about to just jump out the window or something because his nerves are through the roof. Kai shoots him an incredulously look.

“I’m not gonna risk getting a ticket, especially in my brother’s car.”

“Please!” Baekhyun blurts out, more loud and panicked than necessary. Kai jumps and also swerves straight into a pole. He glares at the nervous boy.

“Calm the down! Jesus! Chanyeol’s not going anywhere.” Kai snaps and Baekhyun cowers into the door with his signature kicked puppy look. Kai rolls his eyes but Baekhyun notices he speeds up, just a little.

It’s not long before Chanyeol’s crazy fancy house is looming before them. Kai pulls into the driveway. It’s not even four so his parents are both still at work. Baekhyun wonders if his parents even know. About… what happened. He hopes not. Mrs. Park makes really good food. If she found out that Baekhyun single handedly stomped all over her son’s heart, well… that’d be the end of the food.

“Are we gonna sit here all day?” Kai deadpans. Baekhyun huffs and shakes his head before throwing the car door open so fast, it wobbles. Kai shoots him another look but Baekhyun ignores it.

“Will you just help me with this stuff?” He mutters, lugging a big box out of the backseat. He shoots a weary glance at the sky. In the past twenty minutes, it’s gone from bright and sunny to menacing grey clouds. In the distance, he can even hear thunder rumbling. Rain was definitely not a part of the ‘Get Chanyeol to Forgive Me… Maybe’ plan.

Nonetheless, Baekhyun hands the giant box to Kai as he grips the portable CD player in one hand, and the balloons in the other. He carefully balances the small goldfish bowl in the crook of his arm. This plan is genius. If he were in Chanyeol’s position, he’d forgive himself in a heartbeat (except maybe he’s sort of biased, because, well… it’s him).

Except as they’re walking up Chanyeol’s impossibly long driveway, it’s quite obvious that someone Up There fully intended for his plan to crash and burn. The wind picks up, whipping Baekhyun’s poor Spongebob balloons every which way. The water in the fish bowl is sloshing around, and the poor goldfish is sloshing with it. Baekhyun stops, closes his eyes, tries to regroup. He hears Kai struggling behind him. He just needs to make it the door. Just ten meters or so, and then he’s home free.

But somewhere in the midst of those ten meters, the sky opens up and the downpour starts. Baekhyun wants to cry at his bad luck. He walks as fast as he can with a live fish and an ancient CD player weighing him down, which apparently isn’t fast enough, because just as he reaches the door, a giant bolt of lightning streaks across the street. Baekhyun sets the CD player down a little too harshly in order to get to the doorbell, which he rings frantically, momentarily forgetting that Chanyeol probably isn’t in the best state right now. Barely a minute goes by before Baekhyun and Kai are both soaked straight through to the skin.

“Yeol, godamitt!” Baekhyun frets, still ringing the bell like a madman. “What, no!” He cries, as the harsh winds manage to whip one of the balloons out of his grip. Baekhyun watches forlornly as it quickly gets tangled in a tree before popping. Just like his plan.

“Don’t forget the music,” Kai so helpfully reminds from behind him. “And the bulgogi is getting drenched,” he adds, peeking down into the box.

Baekhyun growls. “Thanks,” he snaps, reaching down to the play the CD he made the night before. It’s a compilation of Chanyeol’s favorite songs, and it wasn’t an easy feat to find most of them, considering most were random video game songs from ten years ago and OSTs of bad dramas. He struggles, because honestly, he’s never had the best coordination and he’s still trying to balance this stupid goldfish and what’s left of the balloons are tangling around his ing neck and he really doesn’t want to die but he’s determined to salvage what’s left of this plan, so he keeps on fiddling with the CD player. It’s at least ten years old and he dug it out of the back of his closet and he’s starting to doubt the life time guarantee that came with it.

He doesn’t think he remembers anyone saying the weather would be this bad, but he never pays attention to the weather report anyways. He vows to start, if he ever survives this. Menacing lightning keeps bolting across the sky. He’s pretty sure it’s not entirely safe to even be outside anymore. The CD player still won’t ing play, so Baekhyun does what he always does in a bad situation.

“Mother ing piece of dammit,” he mutters, just about ready to launch the thing across the yard. He doesn’t notice that the door in front of them finally opens until Kai nudges him none too gently in the back. “What the fu—oh.”

He’s drenched, probably looking similar to a drowned rat. He has a tangle of Spongebob balloons wrapped around his neck. The CD player chooses that exact time to play, except it only plays a few warped notes of the first song (some song from Pokemon… or Yugioh, or something…) before sputtering and giving out completely.

Chanyeol blinks at him. Baekhyun notices that he looks tired, but other than that, he seems fairly put together. He sort of expected him to look a hot mess, bloodshot eyes and all that. He blames the thought on too many dramas.

“What,” Chanyeol says slowly, taking in the scene before him. “The heck is going on?”

“Uh…” Baekhyun looks to Kai for assistance, but he just shrugs. Mindlessly, Baekhyun shoves the fish bowl towards the tall boy.

“What?” Chanyeol asks, looking at Baekhyun like he needs mental help. He probably does. These balloons are cutting off circulation to his brain.

“Uhm, hyung,” Kai mumbles from behind him.

“What?” He hisses. Didn’t Kai remember the part of the deal where he was supposed to keep quiet? He was just the driver and the bulgogi holder. The silent driver and bulgogi holder.

“The… uh… the fish,” Kai says lowly. Baekhyun looks at the fish bowl in his hands.

It’s empty.

“What?” He gasps, starting to look around frantically for the little goldfish. The balloons are going crazy, and while they’ve untangled from his neck, they’re still whipping around in his face, obscuring his view of nearly everything. He just wants to run away, this is all going so horribly. But he’s come this far, he might as well go all the way.

He takes a small step forward to get a better look around. But then—

“Found him,” Kai mumbles, as a sickening squish is heard from the bottom of Baekhyun’s shoe.

“Is this some sort of joke?” Chanyeol says as Baekhyun’s face contorts into one of despair.

“No,” he wails, shaking his foot to get the remains of his little fishy friend off of his shoe. “It was supposed to be for you. To make up for the one your mom gave away. To help you forgive me.”

“You think giving me a fish is going to get me to forgive you?” Chanyeol says, his voice still void of any emotion.

Baekhyun shakes his head. “No! I got you balloons, too! And there was supposed to be music… and… and I made you bulgogi!” Desperate, Baekhyun turns to Kai and rips the box out of his hands before shoving it towards Chanyeol. And while the bulgogi might’ve looked appetizing at one point in time (it’s from the best restaurant on this side of town), as Chanyeol cautiously opens the lid, Baekhyun can see that that’s clearly not the case anymore.

“This wasn’t supposed to be such a disaster,” Baekhyun whispers, about to really and truly break down and cry. “I just wanted you to forgive me.”

“And I wanted you to like me, but we can’t always get what we want,” Chanyeol bites out, shocking both boys standing across from him. Baekhyun feels like crumpling to the ground after hearing the bite in his best friend’s voice.

“I’m gonna go,” Kai says quickly before jetting to the car. Baekhyun watches him go before turning to Chanyeol.

“Can I just talk to you?” He asks pathetically. Chanyeol bites the inside of his cheek before wordlessly going back inside, leaving the door open for Baekhyun to follow.

Chanyeol just stands there, looking at him shiver and shake as he comes out of the rain. Baekhyun knows he shouldn’t press his luck by asking for clothes or anything, so he just tries to ignore it, even if the chance of him catching pneumonia after this are quite high.

“So…” he begins shakily, once it becomes obvious that they’re not going to be moving out of the front hallway anytime soon. “How have you been?”

Chanyeol bites his lip. “Please don’t ask me that,” he says, his voice cracking slightly. “I’m pretty sure you know exactly how.”

“I, uhm…” Baekhyun runs his hand through his soaking wet hair, brushing it out of his face. His teeth are chattering. “Would it help if I explained everything from the beginning?”

“I doubt it,” Chanyeol whispers, looking nowhere now but his feet. Baekhyun bites his lip. He really doesn’t want Chanyeol to cry again. He’s pretty sure he’s going to have nightmares about that day in the hallway for years to come. “It wasn’t just… what happened. You’ve been this way… since forever.”

“What?” Baekhyun asks, even though he’s fairly sure he’s not going to like what Chanyeol has to say. At all.

“Just… really oblivious. To me. And my feelings.” Chanyeol says, sliding down the wall. He’s position is eerily similar to how it was outside of the principle’s office. “You didn’t even like me when we were kids. You used to try and get away from me. Every time you got a new boyfriend, that’s how I felt. Like you were trying to get away.”

“What?” Baekhyun nearly shrieks. “That’s not—“

“Well,” Chanyeol interrupts uncharacteristically. “That’s how I felt. It doesn’t matter if you meant it or not. Doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt any less.”

“Chanyeol, I—“

And,” Chanyeol butts in again. “It’s my fault, too. I was stupid. Really, really stupid. If I weren’t as… awkward or whatever, you might’ve gone out with me. I could’ve been like those other guys.”

“No!” Baekhyun says before Chanyeol can interrupt once again. “I don’t want you to be like those other guys! I like you just the way you are.”

Chanyeol scoffs. “Yeah, okay. That’s really obvious in the way you slept with me just to get to someone else. How is he, by the way? Is he the perfect boyfriend that you always imagined him to be?”

“Yeol, stop,” Baekhyun begs. “You’re making me feel like .”

“Good!” Chanyeol cries, throwing his hands up the ear. Baekhyun pales when he hears his deep voice shaking with the obvious onslaught of tears. “It , doesn’t it? It’s not like I wanted to fall in love with you!” He spits, pressing his hands into his eyes to keep the tears at bay. “It’s just… I just… I’ve never known anything else… other than you. And I didn’t really want to. And… and the fact that you think… that I couldn’t love you… it just doesn’t make any sense to me.”

“Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says quietly, falling none to gracefully to the floor as his shaking legs finally give out. “How long have you…? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know how! God!” Chanyeol says hysterically and Baekhyun realizes in horror that he’s crying again. “I just figured you would notice eventually! None of those other guys had to do anything for you to notice them.”

“Would you please stop bringing up those other guys?” Baekhyun asks desperately. “Do you even know why none of them ever worked out?”

Chanyeol doesn’t answer. He’s sniffling into his knees again, so Baekhyun presses on.

“Because they were perfect. Too ing perfect. And they didn’t care… about my math grade, or how my mom was, and they didn’t wear ugly glasses and they weren’t really good at physics and uhm, yeah… they just… uhm…”

Chanyeol wearily lifts his head from his knees. “They just what?”

“They weren’t you?” Baekhyun says, rubbing his neck. “It sounds cheesy but it’s true, I guess. I mean, there’s a reason they’ve all only stayed around for a few weeks and you’ve been around, well… forever.”

“You said you loved me though,” Chanyeol whispers. “That… night. You said it. And I said it back. And you kept on acting like you were my boyfriend so I just thought…”

“Well that’s uhm… wait, what? You said it back?” Baekhyun asks, his eyes going wide. “Really?”

“Uh, yeah,” Chanyeol says, still sniffling but a blush coming to his cheeks now, too. “Right after you said it. When I, uh… yeah.”

Oh, my god. Baekhyun thinks. Oh, my ing god. If he’d have known… if only he’d have known… this whole disaster could have been avoided.

“Would it count at all if I said it now?” Baekhyun asks, suddenly shy. Chanyeol chews on his lip and looks down again, giving a noncommittal shrug but the deep pink on his cheeks and ears giving him away.

“I don’t know,” he mumbles.

“Because I do, okay?” Baekhyun says, despite his freezing cold state, feeling quite warm inside. “I love you, Park Chanyeol. And I don’t know when it started, but I do know that it took me too long to realize it. And even if it happened under the worst of terms, I’m glad I did. Because what I feel now… I never felt it with anyone else. I feel… satisfied. Like I’m not waiting for something. To break up with someone. I feel… really, really in love. With you. So, uhm, yeah. That’s it, I guess.”

“You guess?” Chanyeol prods. Even though the tear tracks are still wet on his cheeks, there’s a smile on his face. That big smile that he can’t even hide if he tries.

“Yeol, listen,” Baekhyun says, coming over to Chanyeol and sitting in front of his folded legs. He rests his hands on his knees. “I know I’ve been really selfish for… my whole life, practically, but let me be selfish, this one last time. Do you think you could ever, ever forgive me? I know I don’t deserve it, and I don’t think I’ll ever really be able to live with myself after all I’ve put you through. And you really should’t but I—“

He’s interrupted once again by Chanyeol, but he can’t say he ever expected him in a million years to lean over and kiss him. It’s sweeter than the last kiss they shared and it makes Baekhyun feel like puking rainbows all over the place. He won’t though, because, well… his mouth is otherwise occupied.

“You’re very stupid,” Chanyeol says when he pulls away, his face actually bright red now. “But I really like you that way.”

“Does this mean you forgive me?” Baekhyun asks dazedly.

“Almost… you’ll have to completely make it up to me, though.”

“Eh?” Baekhyun blanches. “How…? With like… you know…?”

“No!” Chanyeol busts out laughing, eyes twitching and nose crinkling and Baekhyun just takes it all in because it’s been a while since he’s seen that wonderful laugh. “I was thinking more along the lines of you periodically massaging my back while I try to beat my Smash Brothers high score.”

“Oh,” Baekhyun feels himself blushing now. “I, uhm…”

“I love you, too, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol says, grabbing Baekhyun’s hands on his knees and twining them together. “So is this the part where I ask you to be my boyfriend?”

“No!” Baekhyun says quickly, instantly regretting it when the smile drops from Chanyeol’s face. “No boyfriends, just… best friends. Best friends that… kiss and stuff.”

“What? I don’t—“

“Trust me, please,” Baekhyun begs. “You don’t wanna be my boyfriend.”

“I don’t?” Chanyeol asks, still frowning.

“Boyfriends are stupid. They don’t stay around for long. You’ve been my best friend forever. And I, uh… wanna be best friends… that kiss and stuff… with you. Forever.”

Chanyeol shakes his head, his eyes crinkling. “Baek, you’re so—“

It’s Baekhyun that interrupts him now, leaning across Chanyeol’s tall, knobbly knees to kiss him again. He tells himself it’s to make up for all the lost time, but in reality Chanyeol’s lips are just really nice, and he figures it makes for good practice anyways.

“I think I could settle for best friends,” Chanyeol says breathlessly as they part. “That kiss and stuff.”

Baekhyun chuckles and presses himself even closer. “Kai abandoned me here.”

Chanyeol smiles and runs his hand down Baekhyun’s arm. “I can think of a few things we could do.”

Baekhyun feels his skin heat up at Chanyeol’s touch. To be honest, he wasn’t quite expecting this to happen again. Not so soon at least. But he’s all for it. “And what’s that?” He mumbles into Chanyeol’s neck. It’s soon becoming his favorite place to be.

“Well,” Chanyeol begins in a shaky voice. “There’s a whole box of bulgogi over there. And I’m really, really hungry. Plus, I really think we should properly bury that goldfish.” 

 

 



 

omg no i shouldn't joke sobs i'm soooo sorry ;A;

before i go any further can i just announce that i wrote all of this with y free and single on repeat... i'm still listening to it actually~ 

OK SO REALLY I AM SORRY AND YOU ARE ALL SO GREAT AND I JUST WANNA DIE THINKING ABOUT IT YOU GUYS DON'T DESERVE THIS AND I'M SORRY FOR DOING IT TO YOU AND CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME

how did i manage to gain nearly 100 subscribers without even updating anything!!!!!! /cries

i would name names but certain people really helped me get this out... i think you know who you are lol 

i can't really say much else except for this is the next to last chapter... i'm really sad about it and don't want to think about it so....

btw... i think i should let you know that tumblr is the best way to reach me... since it my soul out and says stuff like 'nooo don't update awkward tonight here have another picture of yixing' ~~true story  just beware of my spazzing and awkward personal posts and freaking crazy exo anons... 

i'll talk to you all next (and last omg) chapter... if i sound sort of detached it's because i'm sobbing my eyes out... ;_____; (and you won't have to wait as long I PROMISE)

(oh also i really wanted to prolong the angst but in my mind this is a humorous fic... its the first time i've written a fic that was ~~~**supposed to funny and yeah... if i hadn't we'd still be in angst city..)

i love you all <3 <3 <3 so so much i don't think i could explain ;A;

~Ari

 

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jinkirei
first chapter will probably maybe hopefully be up tonight~

Comments (2142)

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skeletonfruitcake
#1
Chapter 19: I love the way you were able to convey their feelings. It was very realistic. I was so glad when Baek realized his true feelings. I kept going back and forth with my sympathies. Good job!
littleyamu #2
Chapter 19: omg i am reading his at 1 am and i jus really want to thank you for writing this amazing fic
i am soooooo in love with and the ending is just supeeer cute
CuteSweetiePie
#3
Just here to re-read this piece of pure gold for the millionth time because I went to a bulgogi restaurant and was reminded of Chanyeol xD
ikigainovels
#4
Chapter 4: Aw, poor Chanyeol ;-;
Byundiva #5
Chapter 19: I really love this!! Keep writing ♡♡
Miokon #6
Aww, I love Chanyeol here, awkward but adorable.
A good story, so thank you. ^^
Papoufruits
#7
Chapter 19: I remember the first time I read this fanfic back during the time you published it and that was really the first fanfic I'd ever managed to complete. I LOVE the way you write, the characters, story, everything. I'm so happy my bestie recommended it for me back in 2012, because it's seriously my favourite fanfic ever. I came back to it yesterday night, finished it tonight, and it's really as good as I remembered it, if not better now. Thank youUuUuUu for making this~ you're the best ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡
EXO-l_army1 #8
How cute
kimna-young
#9
Chapter 19: After 4 years I read thus again because I was like checking my labels and this was tagged as my 'favorite' to be honest I forgot the story plot so I read it and I recalled why I labelled this as my favorite!! I Love This Fic!! I Love awkward Chanyeol!!
JUSTUMINE #10
Chapter 8: Chanyeol is soo good to everyone. My reaction is the same with Baek when I read Chanyeol finished his homework