The morning of Donghae's initiation dawned bright and dry, the luminescence of the white sky painful on his eyes. It had been the second night where Donghae hadn't slept, passing the time crying, screaming, breaking things, cursing anyone and everything, crying again, before curling up exhausted on his bed to watch the gradually lightening sky through the windows of his balcony. Though still determined to save Hyukjae, he couldn't begin to think how and he felt increasingly frustrated with the lack of ideas in his mind. 

When Sungmin came to wake the young master from where he was supposed to be sleeping, he was disturbed to find him staring blankly out of the window, eyes wide and gritty and hair tangled.

"Donghae? Sir?" He called out cautiously, stepping towards the bed where Donghae was hunched. Slowly Donghae turned to face him and in his dark eyes he saw a kind of bottomless emotion; indefinable pain, beyond anything Sungmin hoped to ever feel himself, and complete irrevocable despair. 

"What is it Sungmin?" The voice was quiet and level, and Sungmin was gripped with a sort of nonsensical thought that Donghae had somehow aged greatly overnight. The man's calmness scared him.

"Err... Your Father told me to wake you, you have to leave in half an hour and..." Sungmin was starting to feel seriously disconcerted by Donghae's silent gaze "Ehh... what was it? Oh and to make yourself look p-presentable please sir."

Donghae said nothing, just stared as if in incomprehension, nails clutching into his own knees. Sungmin couldn't look away from his eyes, those terrifying pools into which Sungmin felt he would slip into darkness and be ripped apart by sorrow. He couldn't look elsewhere though; Donghae's silence was deafening.

"Kyu..." Sungmin called, knowing Donghae's friend was waiting in the corridor for him to wake up, "I mean Kyuhyun-ssi, please..." 

Sensing the fear in the other's voice, Kyuhyun entered the room quickly, observant eyes picking up on the shattered ornaments scattered on the floor, Donghae's dishevelled state, Sungmin trembling, those dark eyes...

Kyuhyun placed his hand slightly on Sungmin's back, smiled reassuringly at him and pushed him gently towards the door. 

"It's fine Min, I'll deal with this." 

He basked in the warmth of Sungmin's grateful smile for a moment before turning to Donghae as the other man left the room. He put his arm lightly round his friend's shoulders

"What's wrong hyung?"

Donghae broke at the soft contact, the gentleness of the words cracking his facade, his resolve. He cried once again, frankly surprised he had any tears left, and watched Kyuhyun recoil a little in surprise before coming closer and hugging him.

But it wasn't the same. He wanted to hold Hyukjae, wanted him to dry his tears, to make his life easy, because it was all just so right with him.

"I can't do it Kyuhyun, I'm so weak... but I need to save him."

"What? Do you mean that sacrifice kid?" Kyuhyun frowned.

Donghae groaned "You don't understand, he's not a sacrifice, he hasn't done anything wrong."

"But Donghae, he's an abom-"

"Don't call him an abomination!" Donghae said angrily, pushing Kyuhyun away from him and standing up, running a hand through tangled hair. 

Kyuhyun was a little annoyed at being roughly treated by Donghae, but in a way he could barely suppress a smile at seeing his friend once again filled with life, even if it was chanelled through irritation. There was determination in his friend's eyes.

"Yah, don't hit me Lee Donghae!" Kyuhyun chuckled "Now come on, at least wash your hair."

Upon seeing Donghae nod, even though he glared at him at the same time, Kyuhyun smiled and left the room.

Somehow he could do this, Donghae was suddenly seized with a steely determination. God damnit he could do this! It was obvious, he couldn't let Hyukjae die so he would save him. Simple, somehow. He'd work it out. 

He washed quickly and dressed in the ceremonial clothes which had been laid out for him, pulling the blue silk jacket closely to him.

_________________________

So this was it. 

Today he was going to die.

Though still upset about what had occured between him and Donghae, in a strange sort of way Hyukjae had almost accepted his fate. The thought of death was not that terrible - after all his parents were dead, his Donghae wasn't really his at all so what did he have to stay for? He had screamed at the injustice, he had cried at the betrayal, what else was left?

The only thing which truly disturbed him was that his death would be at the hands of Donghae; he knew the man had lied to him  and abused his trust, but he would still have liked to pretend for himself at least that Donghae had cared. Unfortunately  that would be difficult to do when it was he who would be hovering over Hyukjae's neck with a ceremonial knife.

So it was with due trepidation that Hyukjae watched the door swing open and three men enter his tiny cell. Two were guards which he vaguely recognised and the third was a tall man with dark hair and thick eyebrows, who looked thoroughly uncomfortable with his surroundings.

Though Hyukjae didn't know this, Siwon had in fact only been informed that he was to the prisoner to the sacrificial grounds that morning. He wasn't relaxed about the prospect; Donghae had evidently been affected greatly by this man, and to be completely honest Siwon believed in his innocence. He'd wanted to stay as far away from the whole event as possible but Donghae's father himself had requested his presence. Siwon had briefly wondered if he was simply trying to make this whole thing as unpleasant as possible for everyone involved before quelling his treacherous thoughts.

Hyukjae stood up to greet the visitors, and despite his acceptance he still felt incredibly nauseous at the thought of his own impending death. He tried to restrain his panic, ignoring the fact that he was trembling so much his knees clashed together and that silent screams and pleas were lodged in his throat. He refrained from throwing himself at the door, in a last bid attempt to escape, knowing that the guards would stop him.

No words were spoken as the guards grabbed hold of his arms, not exactly gently, and followed the tall man down the corridor outside the box which had been Hyukjae's world for the past few months. The place was not exactly brightly lit but the light which streamed through a small room blinded Hyukjae as his eyes tried to refamiliarise themselves with the brightness of the sky after the constant darkness of his holding cell. Red blurs clouded his vision and he slumped between the guards, fighting to not lose himself completely to the sweet relief of unconsciousness.

"What's wrong with him?"

The tall man had stopped, Hyukjae would have said he looked concerned, if he thought any of these people had the ability to look so. The guards just shrugged,

"It's been in there a while, probably just readjusting." Siwon disliked the tone the words were spoken in and glared a little at the guard responsible before leading the group into a room where there was a bath, and clean robes laid out, made of a rough dark material. This room was brightly lit and upon seeing this and the dark robes which were to be his last outfit Hyukjae couldn't deny his fear any longer and promptly emptied his stomach onto the floor between his feet, head spinning.

Siwon didn't watch as Hyukjae bathed, not wanting to see the prominent bones through his papery skin, and turned away as he was roughly stuffed into his robes, dark cloth pooling around his pale shoulders.

He turned away from the sight, because he felt, like everyone else under the government, it was easier to ignore the sight than fight it.

__________________________

The wind was beginning to pick up as Donghae made his way carefully up the narrow stone-hewn stairs which lead to the cliff top where it was customary for sacrifices to occur. People were already gathered and many turned to stare at him as he approached, flanked by Kyuhyun and the ceremonial knife-bearer. For the first time Donghae appreciated that this did not please the people, he had always presumed it did as his father said it gave them a sense of security, but now he saw no joy in the eyes turned towards him as usual, just fear and disappointment as they realised Donghae was going to become just another murderer in their eyes.

Silently Donghae walked through the assembled citizens to a white block of marble, protuding from the ground like part of a giant skeleton. By the end of this day people expected to see the whiteness run scarlet with blood.

Donghae's calmness was dissipating as the wind blowing off the sea to his right pushed his hair from his face, it's tendrils tangling the strands once more. The task was beginning to once more look impossible; Hyukjae was nowhere in sight and glancing round Donghae saw he was completely surrounded. Some were kinder faces like Kyuhyun's but looking forwards Donghae could only see his father, his eyes daring him to try and run as Donghae eyed the guards lining the clearing. Panic swelled within him and for a moment he thought the darkness threatening his vision would plunge him into relieving blackness once more.

But then he saw Hyukjae.

The man looked even thinner, if that was possible overnight, probably due to the robes which skimmed his slim hips and exposed his collarbones, pale enough that Donghae could imagine they were purely bone. Siwon led him, one hand grasping his arm as a hush fell over the assembled crowd. As they came close enough for Donghae to see the way Hyukjae was trembling, barely able to support himself, and each individual goosebump on his pale neck, their eyes met.

In that moment they were the only two people present, and everything was forgotten and forgiven as they were lost in each other's eyes, revelling in the very sight of each other.

But then reality was suddenly harshly clear as guards forced Hyukjae to his knees before Donghae, forcing him to lean uncomfortably backwards over the marble block, head tilted back and ivory neck exposed. Siwon stepped back looking mildly horrified and for a second his eyes met Donghae's filled with what looked very close to apology. Donghae looked away.

His Father was speaking to the assembled audience, voice raised above the wind, and staring at where Hyukjae was pushed over the snowy whiteness of the marble, almost the same shade as his skin, Donghae wondered how many people sacrificed here had been innocent and victims of nothing more than his Father's will.

"...May his blood further repent his sins..."

Donghae's throat was closing, hands clenched and eyes darting around searching for any way out. The guards were cruelly close, blocking off escape routes.

"...My son will prove his loyalty to you..."

Tears were dribbling down Hyukjae's face from his closed eyes, and dripping off the curve of his jaw. His determination to be strong was completely lost in face of the harsh reality that Donghae was going to kill him. His Donghae. He strained at the guards holding his arms down, writhing in panic.

There was silence, and for a moment all Donghae could do was stare at Hyukjae as the blonde raised his head to meet his eyes. There was no longer anger in his eyes, but fear enclosed his whole face and tears made shining tracks down his cheeks. In that moment they both remembered every moment they had shared; every laugh, every word, every touch. It seemed impossible that all that could be shattered by the blade placed in Donghae's hands.

"Donghae. It's time." For a second the words meant nothing to him and he looked at his father uncomprehending. 

Then he realised. It was now or never.

Donghae lifted the knife over his head, flinching as Hyukjae's eyes were torn from his as his head was forced back with a sob exposing the pale soft curve of his neck.

The world narrowed to just himself, the knife, Hyukjae. Donghae trembled a little before strongly, intently swinging the knife downwards, before he could think it through too much. 

There was a scream as the blade plunged into softness, the sensation made Donghae feel sick and disgusted and he could smell the blood streaking down his hand.

The guard fell back, scarlet soaking his tunic and complete chaos broke out. Donghae swung his elbow into the head of the other guard, grabbing Hyukjae's hand as he fell back to the ground. Dragging the blonde forwards Donghae leapt over the marble stand, surging through people, stabbing blindly at those who tried to stop him.

Hyukjae moved as fast as he could, head spinning, but he was incredibly weak after his isolation and he struggled to keep up with Donghae as he battered his way through where the guards were gathered thinnest.

Donghae stopped as he felt the harsh pain of a blade strike his arm and turned to see his father wielding a knife, anger and madness glazing his eyes. Donghae turned to face him, eyes widening as he saw the knife flying towards his own chest. He could only watch, unable to move, Hyukjae and the audience's screams filling his ears. Suddenly Siwon appeared as if from nowhere.

Donghae could only watch in disbelief as his father was tackled to the ground, the knife slicing Siwon's shoulder as he effectively saved Donghae's life.

"Stop sir! He's your son!" 

Suddenly his Father fell still and Donghae and Hyukjae could only stare in shock at the sword embedded in his stomach. A council member Donghae had never liked much was crouching beside him, hand on the sword hilt. His eyes narrowed as he spoke,

"That was for having my wife killed." Siwon, Donghae, Hyukjae and everyone assembled were silent for a moment, an agonising second of disbelief,  before the screams started once more as the message travelled through the crowd 'the Ruler is dead'.

Guards descended upon the council member and his screams of pain soon joined the fray. Everything moved so fast.

"Donghae, what the hell are you waiting for? Run!" Siwon pushed Donghae away and their eyes met for a moment, and he hoped in that second Siwon could sense his eternal gratefulness, before he turned and ran pulling Hyukjae with him.

There were guards everywhere and Donghae knew they could never get past them, even with the sympathy of some of the audience and the council. People who may have helped were too stunned to do anything but appraise the situation with wide eyes. Because of this Donghae focused only on one thing - the cliff edge and the sea swirling down below it.

He felt a tug back at his hand, thin fingers grasping at his own and turned to meet Hyukjae's dark eyes.

"Donghae... No, we can't..."

Donghae saw Kyuhyun punching a guard who was heading towards them brandishing a knife. Kyuhyun nodded at him, then turned away, back to where a mass of people were fighting over what no-one was completely clear. Another to whom they owed their lives.

"Really, it's not possible... Donghae..." the voice shivered with fear.

"Hyukjae, Hyukjae stop." He took hold of the blonde's face, cradling it between his hands and sweeping the tears from his cheeks with his thumbs. Their eyes met, "Trust me."

Almost as if in a trance Hyukjae nodded lost in the perfect lines of Donghae's face, and narrowly dodging a blade which whistled past his ear Donghae pulled him from the edge of the cliff, stepping out into oblivion together.

*

The ocean was dark, the depths blacker than even Hyukjae's cell. But with the blonde man's hand gripped in his, nails drawing blood as he held painfully tight; nothing would seperate them now, it didn't seem forboding, just beautifully calm.

*

When Donghae awoke the pale hand was still clutched in his and sand cushioned his back. His throat was painful and as he sat up he coughed salt water into his lap, eyes stinging. He turned to Hyukjae who was lying motionless beside him and he panicked upon seeing how pale he was, the way thin scratches decorated his arms, matching the gash of Donghae's own left by his father.

"Hyuk!" he grabbed hold of Hyukjae, propping him up against him.

Eyes fluttered open, almost reluctantly and just as he himself had done Hyukjae coughed water up. Donghae wiped his chin, grinning with relief as he realised they had done it! They were alive... and together and...

"God Donghae, could you have picked a more difficult way to escape?!"

"Perhaps but I like a challenge." He grinned at the man beside him, drawing him closer, and finally their lips touched, perfectly, easily as if they were meant to fit together. It was everything and nothing he had ever imagined, and it was the epitome of all he would ever need.

"I love you Hae." The words were the truth he'd suspected, and to hear them from Hyukjae, to hear the confirmation was bliss.

Love. It was strange; something that the victim would give everything for, do anything. It wasn't something tangible or physical but it was undeniable, at least to him. Lying with Hyukjae under a red sky, reminiscent of the blood which had been spilt for them, fingertips and hearts touching and colliding in a tangle of euphoric confusion, Donghae felt he had never understood love more.

As Hyukjae turned to face him, smile brighter than Donghae would've thought possible considering how closely they'd danced on the knife edge between life and death, he knew he would do it all again, undoubtedly just to see him smile. And damn the consequences.

Hyukjae was a lamb led from slaughter and Donghae was forever his shepherd.

End.

________________________________

The end <3

Thank you very much for reading, please comment to let me know what you thought!

Here's a funny thing - I actually don't like reading angst but about 90% of this was kind of angsty. :P

(Oh and in case you were wondering, Siwon takes over as Ruler)