Choi seung hyun POV

Sitting, standing and I can’t seem to relax. All I’m thinking about was her. She was lying on that hospital bed. Hooked up to all kinds of machine. Hopeless.

Her name was Lee Chaerin. She had been my best friend since we were both in diapers. She never left my side and so do I. We went to the same school and sit next to each other in class. We did everything together.

Unfortunately, chaerin has a very weak heart. She can’t be too emotional otherwise, she’d faint. This started when she was ten. Since then she’d be in and out of the hospital, I visited her every day. I wanted to keep her happy and don’t want to let her tears fall but every time I saw her in pain my heart shattered cause I know our time was coming to an end.

Last year, she started to grow weaker. We tried to apply for a heart transplant but she was not eligible for particular reasons. Since she had to be monitored regularly, they put her in the hospital. It had become her second home. I decided to stay with her and I tried to smile and play with her. I said everything was going to be fine.

One day, she wanted to go home. She wants to sleep in her bed and sit on her own chair. They sent a nurse to accompany her at home. That evening, we went out. She said she want to do what we always did before. We watched her favourite movies, play games at the arcade and eat at our favourite restaurant. I saw her smile, her widest smile since this all began. She was so happy. I told her I want to sleep over her place that night but she sent me home. She said she want to be alone.

When morning came, her mother phoned me. I was kneeling and crying when I heard the news. I can’t believe what had happen. I rushed to her house after that. And there she was lying on her bed, smiling but she was breathless. I asked her mom to let me have a couple of minutes with her. As I was sitting by her bed, I saw a letter with my name written on it. It said:

“Seung hyun ah~ mianhae...

I know I promised to let you stay by my side when the time comes but I don’t want to see you cry. So please don’t cry! Thank you for your friendship and for last night. I wish we could but fate’s calling me. Last night I was so happy we can spend our time like we did before. I wish you have a beautiful life ahead. Please don’t let me see you cry. I am always there by your side, although you can’t see me but I am there, in your heart. I also want to say that I love you more than friends, I’m sorry I didn’t say this before but I don’t want to hurt you more and I was scared. I wish you would always smile and remember me. I will always be there, in your heart. Forgive me I LOVE YOU

Lee chaerin a.k.a your best friend SKY”

As I read the letter, my tears began to fall. I felt so stupid that I didn’t tell her that I love her too. I will never forget her.  Lee chaerin, I know you’re in a better place so I will always smile for you.

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wrote this about 2 years ago and just found it when i was looking through some old book. i edited it and post it..hope you'll like it