“Yo Seob ah, sing!” I saved him from ruining a whole concert.

                “Don’t cry, smile.” I comforted him during a fan meeting and everyone was talking about me.

                “Don’t worry about me, I’m fine.” I told him when he visited my grave even a morning with a terrible weather.

                “I love you, please don’t forget that.” I said when he was looking at a picture of us which we each keep in our wallets.

                “Be happy, even without me.” I whispered when he didn’t smile for more than a week.

                “Please talk again.” I plead him when he closed himself completely and wouldn’t even answer simple yes or no.

                “Yo Seob ah, my love, go home now.” I told him when he refused to go home on a dark spring rainy evening when he had sat on a bench in a park with cans of empty beers around him.

                “My love, please be healthy.” I prayed when he fell sick and had to be hospitalized for a couple of days due to severe fever and stomach problem and a few others which I couldn’t understand when the doctor told our manager.

                “Thank you for the flowers, they are very pretty.” I said one sunny morning when he placed wild poppies he had picked from random road side on my headstone. Upon hearing my voice, he smiled and cried at the same time that morning.

                “Throw that picture away. Don’t think of me anymore.” I shouted angrily at him when he kept staring at the same picture of us for hours and hours with occasion tears falling once in awhile.

                “Stop crying to sleep.” I said when I kissed him goodnight one night and that night, he slept well without nightmares for once.

                “I will always love you.” I told him when he stared quietly at couples walking down the street hand in hand while he was out to do some grocery shopping.

                “It’s raining, go home. Don’t be sick.” I warned him when he came to my grave the day he was discharged from the hospital.

                “Go with them! Have fun!” I urged him to finally agree to join the guys to go watch *B.A.P and Big Bang’s collaboration concert.

                “Don’t wait. I won’t be back.” I yelled at him when he came home drunk one evening and sat on the sofa all night long without any blankets, an eye on the clock waiting for me to come back like usual when I go out to the studio to compose songs.

                “Yo Seob ah, please talk to them again.” I whispered when he ignored the emcee who directed a question to him by accident while they were on stage.

                “It’s not the end of the world with me gone.” I told him when he continued to cry every time he sees, touch, feel or sense something that reminds me of him. It’s saddening that almost everything around him reminds him of me.

                “Sorry I couldn’t make it that night.” I said while crying when my mum visited them and gave Yo Seob my phone and wallet the police had finally returned to them. In there, he found a few pieces of lousy papers I wrote a long time ago about my feelings towards him along with a few cute pictures of him I secretly took when he wasn’t looking. If he were to found out randomly, I would have died of embarrassment. I cried for so long that day.

                “Don’t look back at me and move on.” I urged when girl idols started to pay more and more attention to him and some had already started asking him out to dinner dates. Again and again he rejected gently but I can’t be selfish, I can’t keep him by my side when I can longer give him happiness I could have given when I was alive.

                “You must live on!” I stopped him when he was attempting to commit suicide by slitting his wrists with a kitchen knife. He jumped upon hearing my voice and broke down crying on the kitchen floor until Dong Woon came in and wordlessly carried him to bed while maknae cried silently later when Yo Seob had finally fell asleep.

                “Remember only our happy memories.” I said when he was looking at pictures of us in photoshoots, self cams and so on.

                “You had succeeded living another day without me. Please continue to do so.” I said during my fourth month death anniversary.

                “Winter is here. Don’t forget your scarf.” I called after him when he was late for a concert one day and it was getting really cold out there.

                “I’m happy I met you for I love you ‘till the day I die.” This sentence wasn’t supposed to be heard because it made him cry for so long, I was afraid his tears would ran out and blood would fall.

                “When I see you cry, I cry too.” Which was true because only Lord knows how much I love him and how hard I was trying to help him.

                “Call your mum. Talk to her. Don’t let her worry anymore.” I said and finally he picked up his phone and had a short conversation with his mum. He didn’t say much but it was enough to put his mum’s heart and mind to ease.

                I don’t know for how many days or months had I talked to him this way. Words that were too short and were never the words I really wanted him to hear. I could never figure out why but that was just how it is. The words he always heard were the words that just randomly came out from my mouth but I guess it was the sincerest ones.

                Yo Seob was confused at first. He would whisper my name again and again but five seconds were up. He had never heard me answering him. He cried and mourned during the first week. He sat on his bed gripping and his brown hair looking like he was about to go insane from my voice. I wanted to stop. I wanted to stop letting him hearing me saying words that will only make him feel worst but that little angel warned me that if I stop even for one day, Yo Seob will never hear me again.

                I argued and refuted everything the angel said but she just smiled peacefully at me, not taking the bait to start a fight with me and disappear again. I could only watch in painful silence during the first few weeks when Yo Seob looked like he had gone cracked because he could not understand why and how he could hear my voice.  The other members also didn’t know what to do. They were speechless from everything around them. Beast had become a quiet group where laughter no longer lingers and everyone was always serious.

                Yo Seob slowly got a grip of himself and actually appears like he was looking forward to hear my voice every day. My words soon somehow were capable of lifting the edge of his lips and most of the time he frowns because they were the words he doesn’t want to hear but nevertheless, those were instructions he felt like he had no choice but to comply.

                Without realizing, winter came and by the end of winter when the weather was getting warmer and warmer and people started to go out more and more. Sun would shine brightly in the mornings waking every little living thing up and go out to breath in the coming spring’s fresh air and melted ice.

                It had been more than four months since Yo Seob was capable of hearing me for five second every day. With time, he gradually eats and stays awake more. Slowly, he looks a bit more alive.

                It was a bright early morning when Beast was having a three day break after finishing their latest concerts that had been going on for at least almost a month. The sun streamed in from the windows of our room. Yo Seob slowly woke up from his slumber and sat up in his bed, staring absently at Doo Joon’s empty bed with its owner that had already gone jogging.

                Our lead vocalist rubbed his eyes and turned his gaze to maknae. Yo Seob slowly crawled to Doo Joon’s bed towards maknae. I raised a brow in amusement.

                “Yah!” I whispered loudly at a particular brown haired singer. Yo Seob turned to me, his evil smile and eyes flashed at me tauntingly.

                “Get down and don’t disturb him!” I whispered again when Doo Joon and Hyun Seung entered the room. The two of them stood beside me with raised eyebrows looking up at Yo Seob kneeling on Doo Joon’s bed beside the sleeping maknae.

                “Ahh,” Hyun Seung sighed. “There he goes again.” He rolled his eyes and made his way to get his clothes from his cupboard.

                “Yo Seob ah!” Doo Joon whispered loudly being careful not to wake Dong Woon and Gi Kwang up who were the only ones still sleeping.

                “Don’t disturb him!” Yo Seob stuck his tongue out at us while I sighed in defeat. Poor Dong Woon.

                Yo Seob evilly pinched maknae’s nose and carefully stole his booster away. Everyone held their breath in silence and finally it came. Dong Woon started screaming and wailing in his sleep, unaware of his idiotic hyung playing a prank on him.

                Poor Dong Woon flapped his arms around in search for his beloved booster which he could not sleep without while he gapped for air until he opened his eyes in terror to see an immature hyung above him, still pinching his nose.

                Dong Woon looked like he was about to bawl but Yo Seob spoke before he could react.

                “Maknae, we’re going out for coffee today and after that, we will go shopping.” He ordered our poor maknae while Dong Woon rolled his eyes. Yo Seob then proceed to pulling and dragging the big and lanky maknae off the bed only to succeed in making both of them fall with me and Doo Joon catching them at the bottom.

                It gave me a déjà vu feeling when I watched him crawl towards Dong Woon’s bed and pinched maknae’s nose while stealing his precious booster. It was quite funny to see maknae struggle in his slumber and finally when he opened his eyes, instead of looking like he was about to burst into tears, he had an instant concern and cautious look.

                “Good morning Dong Woon ah.” Yo Seob said releasing his nose and smiled a little.

                “Let’s go for coffee and shopping today.” Yo Seob continued while maknae looked up at him shocked and confused at the same time.

                “Of course.” Dong Woon smiled up at his hyung after he had recovered from his shock. “Let’s go for coffee and shopping.”

                For the first time in about five months, Yo Seob had finally spoken. Quietly, I followed them to their little outing with Yo Seob finally making conversations and talking to our maknae.

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Hi peeps! So sorry for the super late update! I was busy and I just don't have the time and mood to sit down and try to complete this sad, depressing story...

Yo Seob started talking again and for this   *   , it was just my fantasy of B.A.P and Big Bang having a collaboration concert! That's my dream! Hope you all enjoyed this and I hope you all will have patience and keep reading!!

Sorry for the lousy grammar and keep showing some love!