. E I G H T .

Jihye took the first sip of her third star martini. As was the case for many, she was a social drinker. At home, she rarely drank anything alcoholic, except in celebration of certain milestones, depending on her mood. But whenever she went anywhere with friends or her family members, she would carefully inspect the drinks menu before ordering. 

This afternoon's company were Uncle Euisoo and Aunt Mina. It was a late lunch, around 3pm. She had finished her classes for the day and the pair had graciously rearranged their schedules to accomodate hers. Although Jihye spoke regularly with Euisoo, the three of them only ever met up in person once every other month or so. Their hectic schedules usually meant that they kept missing her.

When she had first moved to Seoul to start university, she had been annoyed that her parents had scheduled her to meet up with Euisoo and Mina, because she knew what it meant: It meant that her parents had asked Euisoo to keep an eye on her, to help her get settled in the city and to watch out for her if she needed help. At first Jihye had resented that. It was her first time away from home and she was determined to became an adult with a captial A. She had been determined to Girl Boss everything by herself. But after a while she grew to appreciate having them there. Although she had always gotten on with Euisoo, they became more like friends. Of course she filtered certain information with him that she wouldn't necessary do with her friends from school, but the opposite was also true. She was also more likely to be truthful with him with certain things than with her friends. Like if she were struggling and needed a helping hand. 

Mina had chosen a cute little Italian restaurant. With the lunch rush dying down, there weren't that many people there. Mina sipped on a limoncello spritz and picked at the tiramisu she and Jihye were splitting. Euisoo had stuck to beer. 

"So enough about redecorating the flat," Mina said, turning to face her. "How's work?" 

Jihye took that as her signal to unload. She'd been polite for the past hour and had avoided the topic of conversation she most urgently wanted to bring up. 

"It's going really good," Jihye said. "I think I'm in the swing of things now." 

"Has Yuki warmed up to you yet?" Euisoo asked.

"Work in progress," Jihye admitted. "But, as you guys know, I finally met..." She looked left and right in case anyone was in listening distance, and lowered her voice. "Taemin." 

Euisoo leaned forward, locking eyes with her. "You don't have to whisper," he said, also in a whisper. 

"And? Is he just as cute as in the pictures?" Mina asked, wiggling her eyebrows conspiratorilly. 

"Even cuter," Jihye admitted with a dreamy sigh. 

"I am still here, you know." He glanced at Mina. "Remember me, your husband?" 

Mina rolled her eyes. "What's he like?" 

 "We haven't talked that much but he seems down to earth. But now I've learnt that he's her dad, I'm curious to know who Yuki's mum is." 

Euisoo's eyebrows narrowed. "You saw the articles." 

"Yeah," Jihye admitted, scrunching her nose. "Are you sure you don't know anything about her?" 

"You're asking me if Oh Bitna is Yuki's mother? How would I know that?" 

"I don't know, I was just wondering if it came up in conversation," Jihye said, shrugging. 

Euisoo shrugged in return. "Taemin's personal life is his own. If he doesn't volunteer the information, then I don't ask." 

"So you don't know if Bitna is his girlfriend, either?" Mina asked and Jihye threw her a smile. It wasn't weird to want in on all the latest celebrity gossip. 

"You shouldn't believe everything you see online," Euisoo said, looking thoroughly exhausted by this sharp turn in conversation. 

Jihye scooped up a spoonful of tiramisu and popped it in . "You know, sometimes I do think I'm childish for wanting to know all this stuff that normally I wouldn't think twice about. Like, I've never cared about any of my old bosses' personal lives. But now, with this, it's all I can think about." 

"I would love to know the psychology behind that," Mina said. 

"Me too. After all, parasocial relationships are in fact a pretty new phenomenon. Of course, celebrities have been around forever, but modern social media definitely has changed everything, hasn't it?" 

"You just have the fan mentality," Euisoo pointed out. 

"So when you started working with celebrities, you never had a moment where you freaked out?" 

"Yeah, sure, in the beginning. But after a few weeks you get over it because you get to see them in ways fans usually don't. Like how they smack their gum too loud or litter or treat waitresses like . Things like that really help to humanise people."

"Ok fine," Jihye grumbled begrudginly. "But still. This is just like some fun little puzzle that is tickling my brain. I feel like I have to solve it." 

"Jihye, honestly, who cares?" Euisoo said, and he had a fair point. "Who cares who Yuki's mother is? What is going to change by you knowing that? Why do you even feel like you have the right to try and acquire that knowledge? It isn't your place. As for whether that Astrid girl is his girlfriend, don't you think he deserves a little privacy? How would you feel if you were in a relationship and all these random people you've never even met wanted to know all the details about it?" 

Jihye nodded along to what her uncle was saying, because he was 100% correct. It wasn't her place at all to start digging into Taemin's personal life. She had no right to that information. 

"It's a game for you, but this is someone's real life. Taemin's life, and Yuki's life. Do your job and stay professional. That's all there is to it." 

. x x x . 

Jihye took Euisoo's words to heart. After all, he was right. There had been a time in Jihye's life when she had foamed at the mouth over her favourite celebrities. It was natural when you're a teenager to have a phase- or two, or three, or multiple- where you got obsessed over something maybe a little more than what was healthy.

Looking back at her own fifteen year old self, Jihye admired how passionate and determined she got about her obsessions. Frankly, no one had so much love and passion and loytalty to give as a teenage girl. It was admirable, even. But eventually you had to grow up a little and adopt a more mature perspective on things. Jihye thought she had reached that point. After all, she had "adult problems" now- bills to pay, appointments to make, meals to scramble together so that she could keep herself fed, classes to attend (classes she was paying for). But maybe she was backsliding. Maybe she had been pulled back into the bright lights of the kpop world in a way that she didn't like. After all, there was a difference between listening to a playlist or laughing along to a few videos or livestreams and scouring the ends of the internet to do background research on a random girl that might be your boss' girlfriend. 

Perspective. She needed perspective. And Euisoo had given it. His words had slapped her straight out of the spiral she had been going down. She had needed it. She appreciated it. 

So she gave up on the late night internet searches. Whereas other people browsed questionable reddit forums or websites around those hours, Jihye had wasted away a lot of time on simple google searches, gossip sites and Twitter threads. She had blown the dust off of her ancient Tumblr account and was genuinely surpirsed when she had been able to revive the old email account it had been attached to. But those days were over. 

She cleared her internet history. She redeleted her Tumbl