In the bustling streets of Seoul, i made my way here seven years ago, i have also been a traniee for those seven years. Who would've thought i could feel this much rejection and loneliness. i didn't think it would be this difficult; i didn't know i could be stuck in one place, in one spot for so long.

all it has ever been is me trying to debut with a group but ending up cut out, or like today, i attempted to go in solo, i did my own music, and i was good but not good enough to debut. JYP said i should at least find someone, even one person who wants to debut with me, that i can't do this alone. He said if I get someone he will give us another chance to perform to see if we can debut.

 

Easier said than done.

 

No one even talks to me, let alone wants to work with me. I'm a freak here just like back at home. Why did I think it would be different just because i moved? 

 

I decided to go out for a walk and clear my head. 

 

or at least try to clear my head. 

 

With so much doubt beginning to creep in, i just kept questioning if I should give up on my aspirations. If this was or will be worth it. I feel like maybe It's a sign, maybe I should just quit. 

i rubbed my eyes in frustration letting out a sigh.

 

Can i just get a good sign? Can i get a reason not to quit my dream? i thought to myself.

 

as I wandered through the city, lost in all my thoughts, not fully paying attention i happened to  accidentally collided with someone. I almost fell over but she grabbed my arm to stop the my fall and her drink fell onto my hoodie, then the floor. 

 

; i hope shes not too mad I made her lose her drink. i thought.

 

"Are you alright?" she began, but as soon as I looked up at her, I was struck with awe and couldn't focus on a single word she said.

In that moment, time seemed to stand still as i looked up and found myself captivated by Soojin's presence.

 

 

Is it really Seo Soojin? I had heard about her, thought she was stunning when I saw her on TV, but now, seeing her in person, I'm completely mesmerized. Out of all the people, I was fortunate enough to run into her?

 

She tilted her head slightly and asked, "Hey, are you okay? I'm sorry I ruined your jacket. Let me make it up to you by washing it for you."

 

Snapping out of my daze, I replied, "No, it's alright, really." I glanced down at the spilled drink in front of us. "...I'm sorry for causing you to lose your drink," I admitted.

 

She shook her head. "Still, let me make it up to you. I'll get this cleaned for you," she insisted, tugging at my sleeve, indicating she meant my hoodie.

 

I bit my bottom lip as I pondered. Could this be a sign?

 

"Well," I began, "what if you make it up to me in a different way?" I suggested, an idea forming in my mind.

 

She looked at me with confusion. "What way?" she inquired.

 

"Would you perform with me?" I asked.

 

"Perform with you? Are you an idol?" she questioned.

 

For some reason, in that moment, I felt compelled to tell her everything. I shared how long I had been training, how I struggled to debut because no group wanted me or how I would be kicked out right before a group's debut. I poured out my heart about what happened today and how they refused to accept me moving forward, even as a soloist. No matter how hard I worked, how much I tried, or the kind of song or performance I put together, they wouldn't give me a chance. Once I finished speaking, she paused, deep in thought.

 

"...Would you at least listen to my demo of a song before you say no?" I asked, interrupting her thoughts.

 

Soojin looked at me, puzzled yet intrigued by my proposal. We found a nearby café, where I nervously played the demo I had prepared. The heartfelt lyrics and the melody that flowed seamlessly through the speakers resonated with Soojin, stirring emotions she couldn't ignore.

 

I think in that moment she realized that this unexpected encounter was more than just a coincidence, just like me. It was a chance for both of us to fulfill our dreams together. With a newfound determination, Soojin looked at me and said, "Let's do it. Let's debut together as a duo. I believe in you, and I believe in us."

 

Her words filled me with a surge of excitement and relief. I had been hoping for her support, but hearing her say those words out loud made it all feel real. i had both been chasing this individual dream for so long, but now, it seemed like fate had brought us together for a reason.

 

As we sat in that cozy café, surrounded by the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, we began to discuss our plans. We knew that the road ahead wouldn't be easy, but we were determined to make it work. We brainstormed ideas for our performance of this song, what parts would be Soojin's and Soojin decided to be the choreographer for the song. we spoke there until the café closed. 

 

As we stepped out of the café, I made up my mind to accompany her home. We engaged in a conversation about how we would commence our practice sessions and her potential inclusion in our group.

 

"So, have you come up with a name for our group?" she inquired.

 

"I'm still pondering on that. I never imagined I would reach this point," I chuckled nervously. "Do you have any ideas?" I prompted.

 

She tapped her chin with her index finger, humming as she contemplated. "Well, since there are two of us, maybe we could incorporate that number into the name to symbolize our unity."

 

I pondered for a moment before a thought struck me, causing me to halt in my tracks. "What do you think of Twostar?" I asked.

 

"That's adorable, I like it," she replied, giving me a smile.

 

Before we could delve into further discussion, we arrived at her house. "This is me," she stated, coming to a stop and turning to face me. "Give me your phone," she added.

 

She swiftly typed something into my phone, and a ringing sound emanated from hers. She handed my phone back to me. "So now we have each other's phone numbers. Call me in the morning, and we'll start from there," she said. "Also, text me when you get back to your dorm, okay?"

 

I nodded and responded, "I will, and thank you for this opportunity. I won't let you down."

 

She smiled at me. "I have a feeling you won't. See you soon," she said.

 

"See you," I replied as I watched her walk into her house. Once she disappeared inside, I made my way back to my dorm. I sent a text to Soojin and then allowed myself to sink into my bed.

 

This was real. It wasn't just a dream. I had contemplated leaving everything behind, but now I didn't have to.