Chapter Twelve:

Donghae had given himself a timeline of six weeks. Six weeks gave Hyukjae time to recover from his surgery and hopefully be well enough to start interacting with the world and return to work. And while a part of him itched to start looking for the man, to reach out in some way and let him know that Donghae was still thinking of him, he resisted that urge for a couple of reasons.

First, he wanted to give Hyukjae the time to heal. Not only was it recommended that transplant recipients isolate for 4-6 weeks, but physically he would be restricted from any kind of strenuous activity. The slightest bump on his new kidney could cause problems, and Donghae knew that he was a physical person who liked hugging and rough housing with his friends. By staying away, he was making sure that he himself didn’t cause any harm to come to the recovering patient.

Second, he was finally getting the hang of his former life. Bit by bit, either in large flashback memory dumps, or small whispers of knowledge that he wasn’t aware were back until he suddenly knew them, he was remembering the person he had been. He had been spending more and more time at the company, and while he hadn’t done much in the way of creating, he was more comfortable with how the business had gotten to this point and what was required to keep it moving forward.

Lastly, he was just a coward. He had made up a bunch of excuses to cover the fact that he was afraid to see Hyukjae because he thought he would be rejected. His dream boyfriend would probably be kind about it. He had never given off any hint of having a dark side, and pretend boyfriend scheme aside, there had been no real malice in the things he had said or done during their days together in the hospital.

And maybe there was hope. Donghae liked to think there was. He flip-flopped back and forth between hope and despair on an hourly basis. Keeping himself busy taking back his life was a flimsy excuse for not letting himself ponder the future too deeply. After all, he was no good to Hyukjae if he was the broke, former owner of a failed company. He still hadn’t found the time to clean up his house either and didn’t want to be there alone. Not yet.

Staying with Heechul, however, as much as he adored his brother, was not ideal. His brother was a bit of a diva. Once Donghae could get around on his own, Heechul had reverted to form. If Donghae needed him for something, then he put everything else aside to help his little brother. But more often he was out late and sleeping until the afternoon. And Donghae didn’t mind. He promised Heechul it was all right. His brother had his own life to live and that life had different working hours. Even though Heechul said he wasn’t working for anyone currently, just hanging out and having fun. He knew a lot of people and enjoyed being in the thick of things, Donghae understood that. More now that he had remembered larger chunks of his past.

Yunho was still around, on loan from Heechul’s friend. Donghae had met Hangeng one night when his brother had invited the man to their apartment. Tall and slim, the Chinese man had looked like an elegant and wealthy celebrity rather than the mafia boss or whatever that Donghae had always assumed. He was polite and charming, but in a genuine manner that had Donghae smiling and chatting with him easily before the evening ended.

He assumed that Heechul had wanted to introduce them so that Hangeng would understand why it was so important for Donghae to be protected. And if that was the case, he thought he had done well in proving it. But that was his brother’s business, and he was happy to be separate from it. If Hangeng wanted to pay someone to babysit Donghae, he wasn’t objecting, at least not for now. Yunho was fun to have around, even if he was a bit too serious sometimes, and he treated Donghae gently. Besides, Donghae wasn’t ready to get behind the wheel of a car just yet. He still had flashes from the night of his accident, and even as a passenger he now tended to sit in the back seat whenever possible, securing restrained by his seat belt.

With a tendency to go to bed early and wake up near dawn, he didn’t have as much time to miss Heechul’s company when he was away. He still got lonely some nights. If it got too bad, he knew he could text his brother and he would return home instantly. Donghae tried to bear it so those texts didn’t happen often.

In the morning he liked to exercise. Sometimes when the weather was good, he could convince Yunho to jog with him. And after breakfast he would usually go into work, feeling more at home there as the days went by.

One night he was sitting around after his brother had left, trying to distract himself. He had brought his mother’s flower home from work, wanting it close by as a reminder. He had her pictures, but his early memories were still few and far between. If he were living in his childhood home again, he probably would have made more progress. But for now, he idly played with her flower, letting it bloom, then closing it again.

Until it stopped. Staring at the half-open blossom, he frowned. Was it broken? Surely it wasn’t. But it was rather old now, and it hadn’t been taken care of as well as it could have been. Focusing on the device, he started poking at it carefully with a fingernail, wishing he had the proper tools to dismantle the mechanism and check if something was worn out. Perhaps it just needed to be oiled. Or a piece had sheered off from usage.

His mind began to flash all the scenarios, including the tools he would need to enact the necessary repairs. And suddenly he snapped out of the trance he had fallen into and realized that he understood! He knew how he had created it. He knew how to fix it! He remembered how he had designed all those fabulous toys, from the simplest to the most complex.

With a huge smile, he jumped to his feet and started dancing around the apartment. He remembered! He was a toymaker again!

But the rose was still broken. And he knew right where to find the proper tools to fix it. He could go to the company, but it was farther away, and he wasn’t sure he knew the codes to get into the building at night without setting off some alarm. They had changed everything after his accident and Donghae hadn’t needed to go after hours yet.

But his house wasn’t too far away. And even with the mess that was still there, he was sure he could find exactly what he needed to get the little rosebud working again.

Running for the entry, he slipped on his shoes, grabbed a jacket, and carefully tucked the flower into his pocket. At the last minute he remembered to grab his phone as well, and then he was out the door and into the elevator.

Yunho had probably gone home after driving Heechul to his destination, but no matter. Their apartment was in a busy area, and he would simply grab a cab. Now that he had control of his bank account again and new cards, he was perfectly capable of taking this small step on his own. After all, it would only take him a few minutes to do what he had in mind. Then he could call another cab to bring him back to the apartment and everything would be fine.

He was still a little nervous, trusting a stranger to drive him anywhere. But the man whose cab he rode in was quiet and didn’t want to make small talk. Such a relief.

Arriving at home, Donghae walked up the stairs to the dark house with some apprehension. Heechul had made sure that someone was checking on the place every few days, but there were no lights on inside, which was a bit creepy. Entering the new code, he stepped in and instinctively flipped on the closest light switch. With a deep breath, he told himself it was okay.

There was a lot of cleaning up that needed to be done, but for the time being he focused on his work area. Shuffling all the notes and drawings into a pile, he set them aside and began collecting the various tools that had been swept onto the floor. And having them in his hands again felt comforting, like slipping into your favorite pair of shoes or listening to the song your mother had sung you to sleep with.

Polishing them gently, he set them out in order, grabbing his magnifying glass and setting everything up at the perfect distance. Home. This was home. He knew this. And with a happy smile, he set to work making the repairs on his mother’s flower, paying absolutely no attention to the passing of time or anything else around him.

It was quite late when he finally took a break and looked up. The house was still, the only lights the ones he had around him. The rosebud was as good as new, only needing a touch of paint here and there where the original color had been worn off or chipped. But that made it special, and he had no intention of changing it.

Pressing the leaf, he watched with joy as the petals glided open as smoothly as the real thing. He closed them and tried again. Perfect.

Letting out a hum of contentment, he stood up and stretched. Might be difficult to find a cab now, but there was a subway line a few blocks away. He was a big boy; he’d walked these streets alone thousands of times since he was a child. Of course, remaining here was an option as well. But he didn’t want to worry Heechul, and to be honest, now that he was paying attention, the house did smell rather bad from the food that had probably gone rancid in the refrigerator. He would really need to set aside a day soon and come back to clean the place up.

He would need a nice, tidy home if he planned to ask Hyukjae to come over.

Stopping in his tracks, he smiled again, imagining Hyukjae inside his home. It was a pleasant thought. He had invited friends over before, that was nothing new. But having a boyfriend in his house was something different. Min Hyun had hated this place. Too small, too old, too cluttered. Donghae shook his head. What an idiot he’d been. How could he have ever thought he loved someone when they had rejected the home that was so much a part of him?

Well, that was all over now. He could start new, and he was excited about fixing this place up and seeing what Hyukjae’s reaction would be when he saw it. If he loved Donghae’s house, then he was definitely a keeper, because Donghae wasn’t sure he ever wanted to live anywhere else.

Pulling on his coat, he flipped off the lights and exited the front door. His eyes were still adjusting to the darkness when he was suddenly grabbed from the side and felt his back slam into the wood behind him.

“You little piece of ! I told you I wouldn’t let you do this to me!”

Donghae froze, a wave of sheer terror paralyzing him. But before he could make a peep or even process the idea that Min Hyun was here, lurking in the dark to pounce on him, someone else came between them.

“You were warned,” Yunho’s voice rang out, just before his right arm came up and his fist connected with Min Hyun’s face.

As his former boyfriend staggered backward, Donghae saw another shadowy figure waiting on the steps. The second man grabbed Min Hyun by the arms, wrestling them behind the large man’s back and securing them.

“Yunho?” Donghae managed to squeak out.

“It’s all right, Donghae. He won’t do anything to you.”

“How did you find me?”

“I never lost you,” Donghae caught the flash of a smile. “Go get in the car. I’ll drive you back home in a minute or two.”

“But—”

“Get in the car, Donghae,” Yunho ordered, and this time he left no room for argument.

“Donghae!” Min Hyun shouted, suddenly sounding a lot less aggressive. “Are you just going to let them do this to me?”

A jumble of thoughts and words raced through his mind at that moment. Enough to stop his footsteps briefly as he looked for an appropriate answer.

“I’m sorry. You always said I don’t know how to do anything right,” he snapped back. “That’s why my brother handles this kind of thing for me. He loves me just the way I am.”

And with his heart racing, he turned away and walked toward the car, trying to tune out the shouts coming from behind him. Once he sat down in the backseat and closed the door, however, a wave of panic washed over him. How could he have been so careless? What would happen now? Heechul had promised that Min Hyun wouldn’t be hurt, but he had defied the warning and come after Donghae anyway. Squeezing his eyes shut tight, he told himself he shouldn’t care.

When the car door opened and Yunho slid behind the wheel, he opened his eyes again.

“Are you all right, Donghae-ssi? He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

“I’m fine,” he replied, already feeling calmer. “But Yunho, what will happen to him? Where will you take him?”

“Hangeng-ssi will have a talk with him. He was told what would happen to him if he tried to approach you. He didn’t listen. He’ll learn his lesson and he won’t come near you again. You don’t need to worry about him or even think about him anymore.”

“He won’t… he won’t kill him, will he?”

“We don’t need to kill him. There are plenty of ways to make him go away without that extreme,” Yunho flashed a smile into the rear-view mirror before turning on the car.

“Please,” Donghae begged, “I couldn’t live with myself if I knew any harm was coming to someone else because of me. Will you tell Hangeng that? Please?”

“Listen,” Yunho said, turning halfway around in the driver’s seat and hooking his arm over the headrest. “We can send him somewhere else. To China or America. Let him try to start over there. His personal effects will be liquidated, and he’ll be put on the next plane out. Hangeng-ssi has ways to make sure he won’t come back here again. And if he does, we’ll be notified so that we can keep an eye on him. We don’t need to cause him physical harm, just get him far away from you.”

“Promise? Do you promise that’s all that will happen?”

“I promise, Donghae-ssi.”

“I just… I don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

“I know,” Yunho nodded. “Now let’s get you home. I’m sure Heechul-ssi is tearing his pretty hair out wondering why it’s taking so long.”

And his brother was indeed waiting for him when he arrived back at the apartment. His hair was a mess, and his fancy party clothes were rumpled as if he’d been stalking back and forth for hours clenching the fabric in his fists.

“Hae! What were you doing! Why did you go out alone?” he scolded as he raced to the entry. Before Donghae could even pout, he found himself being embraced in a tight hug. And before he could relax and enjoy it, Heechul shoved him to arm’s length studying his face and body as if checking for a single hair out of place. “Are you all right? Did he hurt you?”

“I’m fine, Hyung. Yunho-ssi was right there. He stopped Min Hyun before he could do anything more than yell at me.”

“Well,” Heechul relaxed a bit but the frown didn’t leave his face. “That’s what they told me, but I wanted to make sure before I believed it. You’re really all right?”

“I’m okay now. I was a little scared for a second. But Yunho took care of everything. And he promised that your friend would send Min Hyun away to America or somewhere and not hurt him.”

“Yunho said that?”

“Why?” Donghae frowned at his brother’s suspicious face.

“No, no reason. If that’s what he said would happen, that’s what will happen. Not that the bastard doesn’t deserve a shallow grave somewhere.”

“Hyung!” Donghae cried out.

“I’m joking, Hae. Maybe. I wish I could ring that ’s neck just once. But it’s for the best. Geng will get rid of him and you can stop being scared. That’s a good thing. It is. But what were you doing out there by yourself? Why would you go out and not tell anyone?”

“I broke mom’s flower,” Donghae admitted sheepishly.

“Oh, baby, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. Because I remembered how to fix it! Hyung, I remembered how it worked! I can make things again, I know how.”

“Really?” Heechul’s eyes lit up with happiness and a smile eased away his stormy expression.

“Yes, I remember everything. And I knew if I just had the right tools I could do it so easily. I thought about the shop, but I wasn’t sure I remembered the codes to get in, so I decided to go to the house instead. I only planned to be there a few minutes…”

“Yeah, well, we all know how you are when you start working on something. You realize it’s past midnight?”

Donghae felt his eyes go wide. He had sensed it was late, but not that four hours had gone by.

“Can I see it?”

“What? Oh, the rose? Sure.” Donghae felt inside his jacket pocket and brought out the rosebud, carefully wrapped in a piece of velvet. “Try it, it works so good now, maybe better than new.”

With a lopsided grin, Heechul pushed the leaf and watched the flower open before letting out a sigh and turning his gaze to his brother.

“I’m glad you remembered. And I’m glad you’re all right. But don’t do that to me again, okay? Geng got a call from Yunho and when I found out what was happening I almost panicked. Then he made me come back here to wait for you. I think I wore a rut in the floor pacing back and forth.”

“I’m sorry, Hyung.”

“No, no, I shouldn’t worry so much. I knew Yunho was watching out for you, but…” he reached over and pulled Donghae against his chest. “I love you so much, you know?”

“I know, Hyung. I love you even more.”

“And you’re grounded!” Heechul snapped back. “No going out for at least a week.”

“Hyung,” Donghae laughed, nearly giddy with happiness. “You can’t ground me anymore. I’m thirty-one years old.”

“I can do whatever I want,” Heechul threatened, though there was no real heat in it. “You’re staying home tomorrow night.”

“I stay home every night,” Donghae pointed out.

“Well tomorrow I’m staying with you, so you better figure out a good way to entertain me or I’m tickling you until you beg for mercy.”

Now that WAS a threat. Donghae found himself nodding eagerly. He would definitely find something to do. Not that he minded at all.

A few days later when Heechul was again out with his friends and Donghae was home alone, he realized that his six-week time limit was nearly at an end. He had spent a day at his house cleaning, and while there was still a load of work to do to make the place worthy of showing off to a potential boyfriend, he felt like he’d made a good start. The mess was gone, the kitchen was cleaned up and aired out. All that was left were the big jobs like a new paint job and some fresh linens and bedsheets.

Of course, he still faced one obstacle in Operation Win-Over Hyukjae. And that was finding the man himself. He could ask Heechul, and Heechul would use his contacts. But that felt like cheating. Hyukjae was his dream boyfriend, and he wanted the man to know he was sincere. Giving his best effort on his own was the right way to go about it. Only if that failed would he resort to asking someone else for help.

He knew Hyukjae’s name. His sister and brother-in-law. He knew the family owned a travel agency here in Seoul and that it had to be relatively close to the hospital because they had brought food there a few times and it had still been hot when it arrived.

He went online and found a number of possible places. A few had social media accounts, and he scrolled through them, but nothing in the details seemed to indicate they belonged to Hyukjae’s family.

But while he was on Instagram he started to randomly scroll through his own photos, curious to see what he had posted before the accident and what sort of things had interested him. There were a lot of pictures of flowers and nature. Smiling, he realized that some things never changed. He still loved flowers. He loved the way things in nature moved, both plants and animals, and had often used them in creating his mechanical devices. There were pictures of coffee shops, windows with rainy streets outside, pretty buildings, pretty sunsets, lots of pretty things.

Donghae felt his smile fading as he began to put together the puzzle pieces. He scrolled more. Coffee. Flowers. A park. Donghae eating ice cream. And then the true kicker. The taco shop, captioned, “Best tacos in Seoul.”

It was their story. His and Hyukjae’s. Pieced together from his Instagram moments, and woven into a romance. Dropping his phone to his lap, he felt the tears erupt from deep inside him and a moment later he was sobbing, his chin against his chest. Now he knew why the things Hyukjae told him always sounded true. Because Hyukjae had based it on the tiny amount of information he had available. But he had added himself into the picture. Creating a story that they had shared.

Perhaps a normal person would have been creeped out by the idea that someone had stalked their social media and made up an entire romance that didn’t exist and probably never would. But Donghae’s heart was breaking at the thought that anyone would have gone to so much trouble just for him. Heechul was sure that Hyukjae liked him, and here was the proof. Hyukjae could have said anything at all and Donghae probably would have believed him. But he had tried to find out as much as he could, telling Donghae things that were as close to the truth as possible. And if this much was true, did that mean the rest was true as well? When Hyukjae had promised he would always be there? That nothing was more important than Donghae? Had he been honest when he said he loved him? That he would love him no matter if he remembered his past or not?

He had to find him! Had to know if the feelings he had were returned. Because if they were… if they were, Donghae thought he might be the happiest person in the whole world. Hyukjae. Sweet, gentle, caring Hyukjae with the soft, kissable lips and that slim body Donghae could wrap up in his arms. He’d barely had a chance to hold him, but he wanted to do it again. He wanted to hold him forever and hear that soft voice in his ear when he fell asleep at night.

Okay, he told himself, lifting his phone again. He would keep searching until he found the right place and then…

Staring at his phone, he realized he must have brushed against something before it went to sleep. The picture of the taco place was still on the screen, but the accounts that had liked his photo had been expanded. Glancing at the screen names he recognized his friends and a few acquaintances. Donghae didn’t have too many followers on his personal account. He tended to use that just for himself, while the company account had a much larger fan base that followed for new toy updates and design news. Thus, he noticed the new account that had liked his picture and clicked on it. Eunhyukjae was the name. And the tiny icon photo was a heavily shaded side view of a slim man standing on the ruins of an ancient building somewhere. Travel. Hyukjae. Excited, Donghae started scrolling down through the pictures, noting that they hadn’t been updated in quite a while. There were typical tourist shots, but well taken. And then a shot of a family group. A group that all resembled one another to the point where it was obvious they were related.

“Honey family in Rome!” it was captioned, with a hashtag about throwbacks and a thank you to the photographer, whose account turned out to be someone with the name Yesung. It was him. It was his Hyukjae. Flipping back to the picture, he stared at the face of the young man looking at the camera. He had said he and his sister could be taken for twins. And aside from their age, the younger man and woman indeed looked alike. Hyukjae. And Sora. Their parents. Taken by Yesung.

Donghae’s heart was beating so fast, but he scrolled a bit more, hoping for another shot of Hyukjae. One without a hat. One that showed his full face and maybe his body. He found it quickly. He found many. Hyukjae being silly. Hyukjae looking pensive in some foreign place. Hyukjae taken by surprise or trying to look y. Hyukjae. His beautiful Hyukjae. He was real. And he was just as handsome as Donghae ever could have imagined.

Then he found exactly the shot he was hoping for. Hyukjae and Sora standing in front of a tidy store front filled with travel posters, ice cream cones in their hands and a giant banner above them that read ‘Dalnim Travel Agency’.

Gotcha! Donghae thought happily. Hyukjae said he loved Donghae. He said he would always be there. It was time to find out if he meant it.