Obvious - UmB
Endless Playlist Stories
The traditional Christmas UmB story - I have never written a story as fast as this one.
Umji P.O.V.
“EunBi?”
“Yewon?”
“Why do you think there are so many stars in the sky?” - I asked her.
“Hum… It is not that Obvious. Why do you ask?” - She responded with her usual calm tone.
“There are so many unanswered questions.”
I sounded very frustrated and it was only genuine. My dream was to know everything - or at least the maximum I could in this short lifetime of mine.
“Can we just enjoy the night sky view? It is not often that the weather is optimum for that.”
Eunbi was quite different. She said she was just a passenger in this spaceship that is Life - admiring the view that was offered from the window.
While I wanted to command that spaceship to go everywhere and discover everything.
Not convinced by her argument, I stood up from the grass floor. We were in the garden of my parents house. Eunbi has been my only best friend for many years. Only she could understand my passion for knowledge.
“Where are you going, Yewon?”
“I need to know the answer to my question. I must have a book somewhere.”
Christmas was right around the corner but there was no time for that. Answers.I needed answers. I was so frustrated not to have found the book containing the answer.
I couldn't care less about the magic feeling of Christmas. The scents and smells at the dinner table. The meaningless gifts.
And again the only thing that drew up the smile on my face was the thoughtful gift of Eunbi.
“Everything you need to know about the Stars and beyond” - I read the book cover and the tears of joy in my eyes lifted Eunbi's lips up into a slight smile.
“I don't have a gift for you, Eunbi… I had been preoccupied with finding the answer.”
Eunbi nodded in understanding before replying the usual sentence:
“I don't want gifts.”
Eunbi always appeared so nonchalant and calm. It was soothing - yet I was so used to it that it was part of the background atmosphere to me.
And some do say, you never know the value of something until you lose it.
It wasn't Obvious to me back then … at all.
With the end of high school arriving, reality hit me.
“Yewon, I need to tell you something”
Eunbi never sounded that serious. As I said, she was always neutral when it comes to her voice tone.
“Tell me”
“I will leave town to pursue my studies”
“I thought you said we would enroll in the same university?
“I opened my eyes on what I want to do. Being an erudite like you is not what I am good at. I prefer crafting things with my hands.”
I was speechless but unknown onto why I was feeling like this. I had never questioned any emotional state. For me, they were not rational and thus, any research was doomed.
Yet, for the first time, I wanted an answer.
“Say something… as it isn’t Obvious to me.”
Eunbi asked and unfortunately I couldn’t answer. I didn’t have one.
So I just nodded and for the first time, I saw something in her eyes. I am not sure what it was: sadness, disappointment…?
Our lives went on until Summer. Or at least I thought everything was normal.
I buried myself in quests of knowledge.
I was desperate to expand and explore into the unknown.
“When are you leaving?” - I asked her at last. It was strange how I needed that answer sooner than I thought but never dared asking.
“At the end of August.”
“For how long?” - The question automatically rolled out my tongue before my brain could even process it.
“I don't know, Yewon. Studies can take some years … it isn't Obvious.”
I didn't notice back then but Eunbi would always repeat this last sentence. It was frustrating for someone like me seeking answers 24/7.
Lack of precision was something I despised most. That is how much I hated Eunbi’s answer.
The days passed and I must have become allergic to Summer. Indeed, I was coughing non stop.
I was shivering even though it was pretty warm outside.
Yet and as I have always been convinced, I focused on the only thing that had value to me: nourishing my mind with knowledge.
One night while I was actively searching for an answer - I overheard my parents’ conversation:
“Yewon is not eating. Is she on a diet?”
I almost laughed at the last sentence. Everyone knew I couldn't care less about physical appearances - thus I couldn't be on a diet.
It wasn’t me… Obviously.
It is shivering to attest that I overlooked something … a component of knowledge. Indeed, while the tip of the iceberg is what we think we know about ourselves - There is another hidden part which is everything unknown to ourselves.
The day Eunbi left was special. I didn’t feel like doing anything. It was like a grieving day but I couldn’t explain why back then.
It isn’t Obvious. That's what Eunbi would have said. Strangely none of us exchanged words on that peculiar day. Instead, we had these long silenced conversations through our eyes. It isn’t rational but it seems like we both felt content by it.
Then university arrived and I thought I would be in heaven with all the knowledge I was given.
Yet, everything just hit me like a tsunami.
I found myself in a hospital room with my parents by my side.
It was their turn to seek for answers I never considered important.
“Doctor, is it serious?”
“Your daughter is weak. We are not sure of what it is. Except for the poor diet, nothing indicates any serious illness.”
A long and heavy silence followed suit before the doctor resumed:
“We will keep an eye on her to monitor the progress and make sure her health stabilizes”
I couldn’t believe my ears. I was as surprised as everyone in this room.
First, how can I be weak? Second, how can doctors lack precision in their answers?
I know what Eunbi would say:
“It isn’t Obvious” - I whispered. The doctor turned towards me and faintly nodded.
Should I come to terms with the fact that questions do exist with vague answers as true answers?
Thus, was my current state doomed to remain a mystery?
It was killing me.
Wait! That's the answer! I was merely stuck in a full circle: not knowing answers was making me in this state and this state was raising even more questions needing answers. All of it was killing me slowly.
Well now I know the truth. Thus, I should feel better, right?
That's what I thought but I still spent the whole month of September at the hospital.
Doctors were perplexed.
“Maybe I will feel normal again by going on with my life?” - I asked the doctor one day in vain.
They were desperate and even assigned a psy to find the answer.
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