“I had someone once who made every day mean something.
And now… I am lost…
Nothing means anything anymore.”

― Ranata Suzuki

Yoon stared unseeingly out of the window, his mind swirling with sad thoughts and sadder memories.

It was raining again, a common feature of his life in Cambridge, but it had never been this depressing before. The rain hammered on the flimsy overhang sheltering the balcony of his shared flat, streaming down in long sheets and battering the potted plants Seunghoon had bought cheap at a garden sale a few days ago. 

His heart felt like those soaked plants, drowning in a desolate sea of feelings and emotions he just wished would disappear. 

2 weeks.

2 weeks since he broke up with his boyfriend of 5 years over an unceremonious pub lunch and a couple of texts.

Jinwoo was exchanging worried glances with Seunghoon over the kitchen island. Yoon knew they were worried about him - he hadn't gone out of the house, skipped 2 days of classes and ignored all the texts from his professor regarding his final year dissertation.

He'd done nothing but sleep and mope around in his bed, barely summoning the energy to wash up and go to the bathroom. Jinwoo had left him alone for the weekend, ignoring Seunghoon's protests about him needing proper food and fresh air. Now, they were both visibly antsy. 

It wasn't fair to them, Yoon knew. They'd been nothing but understanding, and what had he done? He'd completely disregarded their offers of help. 

It looked like Jinu had lost their telepathic argument. He approached Seungyoon like he was a wounded animal, footsteps soft and wary.

'Yoonie...'

He felt Jinu's warm palm on his shoulder, his body heat slowly leaching through the thin material of his shirt. Warm. So warm. 

When did he get so cold?

'I know this is hard for you, but you've got to keep going. You've barely eaten anything for 2 days, and you're still wearing the same clothes you wore Saturday night. You haven't talked to  your friends, and your professors think you're sick. This isn't good for you, Yoonie. How about we -'

Seunghoon broke in abruptly.

'Everyone's worried about you, Yoon. We know Jaebum meant the world to you, but -'

Mistake.<