Kagoshima - 2005

 

The scorching summer heat burned down onto Sakura's skin as she pushed herself into a final sprint. Her friend, Adachi Yuto, was waiting for her at the finish line with a stopwatch in hand.

 

"Time!" Yuto shouted when Sakura crossed the line. "24.38 seconds."

 

Sakura let out a frustrated whine in between catching her breath, visibly disappointed with the results. "My time hasn't improved at all the past two weeks… I'll never be able to finish a hundred meters under twenty seconds before we graduate…"

 

Yuto encouraged her with gentle pats on her shoulder. "You will. Keep at it and don't give up."

 

"Easier said than done," Sakura muttered under her breath, then spoke up with a smile. "Thanks for timing me again, Yuto-kun."

 

"You're welcome. I'm still sorry I won't be able to time you anymore. I'm going to be busy with the student council and my supplementary classes starting tomorrow."

 

"Not at all. I've troubled you enough. I know you have to focus on your studies."

 

Yuto nodded. "We're in our final year. I know you're determined at cutting down your time but don't forget to focus on other things that are important. Like what you want to do after high school."

 

Sakura didn't say anything and instead puffed out her cheeks before waving goodbye to Yuto.

 

She headed inside the bathroom to wash her face and change out of her gym clothes and back into her school uniform. Once freshened up, she hurried towards the school's scooter parking area. Nervously, she hid behind the corner of the administration building, pulling out a compact mirror to quickly fix up her bangs, then carefully peaked around the corner. Another girl with beautiful jet-black long hair was entering the parking area from the opposite side, carrying her school bag over her shoulder.

 

Sakura took a deep breath and walked slowly around the corner.

 

"Hirai-chan!"

 

A smile curved on Momo's lips. "Miyawaki. Are you heading home now?"

 

"Yes, I am," Sakura replied, attempting to stop herself from smiling so much.

 

"Would you like to ride home together then?"

 

Filled with absolute glee, all Sakura could do was nod.

 

Tanegashima Island was one of the bigger islands located in Kagoshima Prefecture that could only be accessed by plane. Predominantly, it was a rural area with large fields of farmland stretching across the earth and roads that when on forever with beautiful coastlines to swim in and smell the ocean. There weren't any skyscrapers or advanced transportation like bullet trains.

 

It was why Sakura was shocked to learn that Momo moved to Kagoshima from Tokyo during her final year of junior high. Momo came from another world that Sakura has only seen in movies, dramas, and the news. Tokyo seemed like it was a city from the future. It was sometimes difficult for Sakura to comprehend the fact that Kagoshima and Tokyo were prefectures that existed in the same country.

 

Many were entranced by Momo's beauty, boys and girls alike. Her face was pretty, with long lashes and pink lips, but had athleticism that rivaled the boys. Despite all that, Momo was kind, gentle, and reserved. She was approachable and smiled at anyone she spoke to.

 

It was that very smile that captured Sakura's heart.

 

Since then, Sakura did all she could to get closer to Momo. She managed to pass the entrance exam to attend the same high school as Momo. Though she was bad at running, Sakura tried out for the track and field team to be in the same club as Momo, however in the end, she was rejected due to her poor performance. But was enough that Momo noticed her disappointment and encouraged Sakura to keep running and keep improving, motivating Sakura to run all on her own and set a goal for herself.

 

It was a shame that throughout her entire three years, Sakura never had the same homeroom as Momo.

 

So like a pathetic, eager pup, Sakura would try to catch Momo going home whenever she could.

 

Because Momo always asked if Sakura wanted to go home together.

 

Because Momo was kind.

 

 

 

They parked their scooters by a local convenience store that stood at an intersection. It was one of Sakura’s favorite places because she was able to spend more time with Momo since they don't see each other much during school hours.

 

Sakura was looking through the assortment of cold beverages in the fridges. Each one had its own unique packaging. She wanted to pick one that made her look cute while drinking.

 

As usual, Momo was quick to decide and grabbed a carton of coffee mixed with French vanilla creamer.

 

“You always get that coffee,” Sakura remarked with a smile.

 

“It’s my favorite,” Momo answered with a smile of her own. She closed the see-through fridge door and headed towards the cashier. “I’ll wait for you outside.”

 

Sakura pouted to herself and quickly picked out a small carton of strawberry milk. It was a light pink color with an image of a strawberry on the side.

 

She went up to the cashier and placed the yen into the money tray. The owner was a sweet, middle-aged woman who always greeted her customers with a smile, especially when they make a purchase.

 

“Thank you for always coming,” the owner said while giving Sakura her change.

 

“Of course. Thank you very much,” Sakura replied and dipped her head politely.

 

Sakura grabbed her strawberry milk and left the store. She was about to turn the corner when she caught Momo on her phone and took a step back.

 

A sharp pang of sadness poked at Sakura’s heart. There were few occasions she caught Momo on her phone like this. Sakura always wondered who she was texting and was envious at whoever was receiving Momo's messages. She wished she was the one Momo was texting, but that would never happen because they’ve never exchanged numbers. Even though they were both girls and should be natural, Sakura was always too nervous to ask for Momo’s number, and Momo never asked Sakura for hers either.

 

Sakura took a deep breath and walked around the corner with a smile to mask her disappointment.

 

“Sorry to make you wait! I finally made a decision!”

 

Momo closed her flip phone and turned her attention to Sakura. “It’s alright. What did you end up getting?”

 

“This brand of strawberry milk. " Sakura held up her choice. "I saw Sayaka-chan drink this the other day at lunch and wanted to try it.

 

"It has a cute design," Momo commented as Sakura took the spot next to her on the bench.

 

"Doesn't it? It's a very cute pink color. I'm hoping it tastes good too!"

 

Their talks were always brief and always about the most trivial topics, but it was moments like these that Sakura treasured and wished for time to slow down so she could stay by Momo's side just a little longer.

 

 

 

 

"Miyawaki Sakura. Please come to the counselor's office."

 

The announcement blared throughout the entire building.

 

Everyone's heads turned to Sakura's direction. Her face became bright red and her ears burned hot to the tips. Her teacher dismissed her and she swiftly left the classroom to head to the office. When she stepped through the sliding door, her advisor motioned her to sit across from him then placed a blank form on the table between them.

 

"You're the only one in your graduating class that hasn't submitted a career plan," he began. "I'm not one to push matters but I am concerned that it doesn't appear you have any idea what you want to do once you graduate." He cleared his throat and pulled out a few documents. "Looking at your grades, your optimal paths are going to vocational school or attending a local junior college."

 

Though her posture was straight, Sakura kept her head low and her eyes stared at the empty career plan form. She felt a mixture of shame and annoyance as her advisor continued to lecture her.

 

Noticing he wasn't getting through to her, he simply sighed and pushed the form closer to her. "I've already contacted your parents about this. You'll have till Monday to turn it in." He paused briefly to collect his thoughts. "Believe me when I say that you should be enjoying the present. Enjoy the rest of your high school days and treasure them while you can. But it's also important to think about the future. What you want beyond these school walls.

 

You can't control time, Miyawaki-san. Time is always moving forward no matter what we do."

 

 

 

For the rest of the day, Sakura felt the weight of her advisor's words. She mulled over her options, wondering what she could do, but in the end she couldn't find an answer. It wasn't that Sakura never thought about her future, but rather it was because Sakura was focused on accomplishing other goals.

 

She wanted to finish 100m under twenty seconds to prove to herself that despite her lack of any natural athleticism, even she could achieve amazing times with enough hard work and determination.

 

If she achieved her goal, Sakura believed that she would be able to summon enough courage to confess her feelings to Momo.

 

Were the two unrelated? Yes.

 

But it was the only thing that drove Sakura to move forward.

 

For four years, Sakura has kept her feelings hidden and throughout those four years, she felt like she was frozen in place. How could she think about the future when she can't even tell the girl she likes her feelings?

 

Sakura didn't have Yuto to spot her times but it didn't stop her from running after school. She practiced longer than usual but her mind was far too cluttered with worries that she couldn't focus. In the end, she ran more laps but each was slower than the last. She didn't need a stopwatch to tell that her times were terrible, but she didn't care since she wasn't eager to return home to receive an earful from her parents.

 

Distraught, Sakura headed to the parking lot after freshening up. She wasn't surprised when she didn't find Momo's scooter, which soured her mood even further.

 

"This day couldn't get any worse," Sakura mumbled to herself as she put her helmet on and hopped onto her electric scooter.

 

The ride home felt lonely but it did ease Sakura's mind somewhat. Twilight was settling in, a blanket of darkness about to cover the town, a blend of orange and red hues bordering the horizon as the sun was setting. She loved feeling the cool air blowing against her skin during these hot summer nights, and without Momo riding with her, Sakura was able to focus on something other than her.

 

Yet as soon as Momo crossed her mind, Sakura found a scooter parked off to the side of the road. Upon inspecting the license plate, Sakura realized it was Momo's. She parked her scooter beside Momo's and began looking around. Far up on top of a grassy hill, Sakura found Momo sitting alone, her face illuminated by the faint glow of her phone's screen. Much like the other times she has caught Momo texting on her phone, Momo always looked deep in thought, as if she was choosing each word very carefully. Like a moth to a flame, Sakura slowly approached Momo, unable to escape her attraction to the other girl.

 

But this time, Sakura was very aware of the way her heart was clenching so tightly, so painfully, that Sakura almost couldn't breathe.

 

The moment Sakura was having second thoughts and began turning away, that's when Momo spotted her. "Miyawaki? Is that you?" Momo asked as she put away her phone. "How did you find me?"

 

Sakura looked back at Momo and flashed a sheepish smile, once again moving towards Momo. "I saw a scooter that was parked and recognized it was yours. May I join you?"

 

"Of course," Momo answered and motion to a spot next to her. Sakura obliged and sat on the grass beside Momo. "I'm glad you found me though. I didn't catch you at the parking lot."

 

"I'm glad too," Sakura said. When she saw the way Momo was smiling at her, so welcoming, so gentle, Sakura felt her heart tightening again.

 

Momo was always so kind to her.

 

So kind, that sometimes, it made Sakura want to cry.

 

"I heard you got called into the office today," Momo brought up, breaking through Sakura's train of thought.

 

"Mhm. I haven't turned in my career plan yet." Sakura began picking at the blades of grass around her feet. She sighed despondently. "I just… I don't know how to plan so far ahead. I can barely plan for tomorrow. Are you planning to take any entrance exams for college?"

 

"Yeah. I'm applying for a few universities in Tokyo."

 

Sakura felt her heart tightened again. "Tokyo, huh? I'm not surprised."

 

"Really? Why is that?" Momo questioned, her head tilted to the side in confusion.

 

Sakura chuckled softly. "You always look like you want to leave this place. It must be nice though." She pulled her legs to her chest and loosely hugged her knees, gazing at a couple of large wind turbines slowly rotating in the distance, smiling wryly to herself. "You know what you want to do. You don't have any doubts."

 

"That's not true. I'm always worrying," Momo murmured almost cryptically.

 

"Eh? No way. You're lying, Hirai-chan."

 

"I'm not. I'm being honest." Momo sat up straighter and looked to the sky. It was nightfall by this time, a sea of stars now shining down on them with the moon large and round, glowing protectively above. "I'm doing what I can to keep moving forward. One step at a time. One worry at a time."

 

Those words touched Sakura's heart and alleviated the burden she was feeling throughout the day. Knowing that Momo was also struggling like she was, made Sakura feel much closer to her. Both of them were dealing with the problems of the future, the unforgiving speed that time moved at, and though Sakura had no idea what Momo's problems were, she was happy that Momo confided to her.

 

Sakura felt closer to Momo than before and that made her happy.

 

 

 

Their usual path home was blocked by a barricade and a single truck carrying very large cargo from NASDA across the intersection perpendicular to them. Sakura stared in awe at its massive size.

 

"Amazing," Momo uttered aloud and lifted the visor of her helmet to get a better view.

 

"They say that the rocket will travel at five kilometers per hour," Sakura said, eyes still glued to truck moving at a snails pace. She noticed Momo looked at her with an intense gaze. Sakura met her eyes shyly. "T-That's what my dad said anyway. The launch is supposed to happen at the Minamitane Launch Facility so I'm guessing that's where the truck is headed."

 

"Ah… Right," Momo muttered distantly, shifting her gaze back on the cargo. "It's supposed to be the first launch in awhile right? I remember hearing it on the news. They're sending it into the far reaches of our solar system."

 

"It will be hurtling through space for a long time. Such a lonely journey," Sakura mused.

 

"Yeah. Very lonely," Momo agreed quietly and pushed her visor back down.

 

They were stuck at the crossroad for another half hour. Sakura came home later than she usually did and was afraid of the scolding she was going to receive on top of the fact she hadn't submitted her career plan form yet. But to her surprise, both of her parents were understanding when she explained herself to them.

 

"No one can predict the future but as long as you continue searching for the answer, I know you'll be fine," her mother told her. "Don't give up."

 

With that, Sakura went to bed with renewed hope.

 

Something was about to change.

 

She could feel it.

 

 

 

"Yuto-kun!" Sakura called out as she ran onto the track field in her gym clothes.

 

"Morning," Yuto yawned loudly and waved. "Nice timing. I just finished setting up the starting block."

 

Sakura set down her bags on a metal bench then walked over. "Thank you so much for coming to school this early for me. Especially to time me."

 

"It's not a problem," Yuto assured her with a grin. "It works since all my student council duties happen during and after school. I won't wake up this early for you every day though."

 

"I'll make today count then," Sakura promised.

 

After properly warming up her body, Sakura positioned herself behind the starting line and placed her feet on the starting block.

 

Yuto stood at the opposite end of the track and prepped the timer. "Ready!"

 

Sakura focused.

 

"Set!"

 

She lifted her lower body into the air.

 

"GO!" Yuto shouted.

 

Then pushed herself into a sprint with almost perfect timing.

 

Sakura could feel it. Everything about her body felt different. Her body was light and her footsteps were even lighter as she dashed across the track. The morning sun energizing her. Nothing else was on her mind. No worries. No fears. Nothing but reaching the end. Her legs were burning more than before and she swung her arms harder than before, but Sakura kept pushing forward until she soared over the finish line.

 

"Time!" Yuto called. He looked down at the stopwatch, blinking several times. "Whoa!"

 

Sakura was gasping for breath as she clutched her chest. "W-What is it..?"

 

"19.68 seconds!" Yuto exclaimed. "That's such a big difference from your last personal best! You did it, Kkura-chan!"

 

Through the heavy panting and the numerous beads of sweat sliding down her forehead, Sakura grinned so hard and pumped a fist into the air. "I did it! I finally did it!"

 

"Congratulations! All your hard work finally paid off!" Yuto said and gave her a light pat on the shoulder. His expression softened. "I'm really proud of you. It's been an honor watching you grow."

 

Sakura's expression matched his, touched by his words. "Thank you for supporting me and helping me achieve my goal. I wouldn't have come this far if I didn't have your help."

 

He grinned cheekily. "What are friends for? Do you feel like you're ready to graduate without any regrets?"

 

Sakura sighed deeply and placed a hand over her heart. It was beating rapidly, but it was not because she finished running. It was thumping so hard and so fast in her chest because Sakura was nervous.

 

"Not yet… There's something else I need to do," Sakura whispered quietly.

 

 

 

Sakura stood hidden behind her usual corner and waited for Momo. Throughout the entire day, Sakura's heart never once reached a resting state. The time finally came. She did what was considered to be the impossible for her body and achieved something amazing. Sakura was determined. She didn't have many days left before she was no longer a high school student. All she needed to do was gather enough courage to trample over her fear.

 

"Miyawaki?"

 

Sakura squeaked when Momo caught her peeking around the corner and walked around the corner to meet Momo halfway. "Hirai-chan. You saw me," she laughed sheepishly. Sakura could already tell her cheeks were burning.

 

"I did," Momo admitted with a low chuckle. "Shall we go home together?"

 

Sakura nodded, trying to control the butterflies that were fluttering violently inside her stomach.

 

Everything happened like usual. They both mounted their scooters and drove off on their usual route, with Momo barely ahead of Sakura. Like other days, they stopped by the convenience store to buy drinks and relax. However, unlike before, Sakura swiftly chose the same carton of coffee Momo always got.

 

"I've never seen you choose so quickly," Momo observed, an amused lilt heard in her tone.

 

"Last time I tried what Sayaka-chan had so now I want to try your favorite," Sakura answered with a laugh. Her heart was still racing nervously within her ribcage as she and Momo paid together for the first time.

 

 

Sakura knew this was her chance.

 

 

She was going to confess to Momo.

 

 

When they stepped outside, Sakura attempted to steady her breathing and reached out to grab the end of Momo's top. "Um… Hirai-chan…"

 

Momo stopped in place and looked over her shoulder.

 

Sakura froze.

 

Under the dim, fluorescent lighting of the convenience store sign, Sakura could see Momo's eyes very clearly.

 

Momo's eyes were hollow and unfocused.

 

Sakura felt her heart drop.

 

A moment later, Momo smiled at her and spoke to her in a gentle, hush tone. "What is it, Miyawaki?"

 

Sakura swallowed thickly.

 

It was becoming difficult to breathe.

 

"Sorry… It's nothing."

 

Momo gave Sakura a puzzled look but didn't question her further.

 

 

 

 

When they finished drinking their coffees, they hopped onto their scooters. Sakura tried to start up the engine, but her scooter wouldn't budge. Frustrated, she kept trying but with no success.

 

"Here, let me see," Momo offered. She took off her helmet to check the battery inside Sakura's scooter, frowning at her discovery. "Looks like the spark plug is dead. Doesn't look like it's been replaced in awhile. Was this a secondhand scooter?"

 

Sakura nodded slowly. "Mhm. My dad bought it off from one of our neighbors. Said it used to belong to their son."

 

Momo stood up and patted dirt off from her skirt and hung her helmet on one of her scooter's handlebars. "Unfortunately, it's officially dead. It's best to leave it here and call someone to pick it up when you get home. I'll leave my scooter here too and walk you home."

 

"You don't need to do that! I can walk home by myself," Sakura spoke out. The ache in her heart was gradually intensifying. "Your house is further than mine. I don't want to trouble you. You can go on ahead."

 

"It's alright. I don't mind," Momo insisted. Momo paused to look at the golden-orange sky above them, adding, "Besides. I kind of want to walk."

 

Sakura couldn't persuade Momo to change her mind, and so, they began their slow trek back to the neighborhoods.

 

Momo walked beside Sakura. Momo was far more athletic than her. She could walk faster, but she always matched Sakura's pace.

 

Because Momo was kind.

 

Momo was always kind.

 

But even though Momo was walking beside Sakura, there was a visible gap between them that was accompanied by a heavy silence that hovered over them. Sakura couldn't think of anything to say to start a conversation. Momo remained quiet and kept gazing at the sky. The only sounds were the cicadas buzzing all around them and the rustling of the trees and grass as gushes of wind would blow by.

 

The longer the silence dragged on, the truth that Sakura desperately tried to ignore was unraveling before her. The ache in heart finally reached its peak. Unable to hold back her tears any longer, Sakura began to cry.

 

Momo turned around when she felt Sakura fall behind, eyes widening when she heard Sakura's sobs. "Miyawaki… What's wrong?" Momo stepped closer and spoke even softer. "Miyawaki?"

 

"… -top." Sakura muttered.

 

"Huh?"

 

Sakura tried wiping away her tears with the back of her hands, but the tears were never-ending. "Please stop…"

 

 

 

Please stop being so kind to me…

 

 

 

Sakura could feel Momo standing so close to her, feeling the worry emanating from her presence, but helpless to do anything. Sakura wished the pain would stop. It hurt so much.

 

Then the sky suddenly turned dark and a single, blinding ball of light emerged from the distance.

 

Sakura and Momo turned their attention to the rocket that was taking off and piercing the sky with a loud, thunderous roar that went on forever. The sound was deafening and shook the land, even as it continued ascending through the earth's stratosphere and hurtling into unknown territory. The rocket was beginning its journey, uncertain how long it would take to fulfill its purpose, moving forward without hesitation in order to search for answers.

 

The sky eventually fell quiet and all that remained of the rocket was the trail of smoke that lead to the heavens above the clouds. Even though the launch was over, Sakura kept staring at the spot in the sky where she last spotted the rocket, saddened that the marvel she witnessed was over.

 

Sakura glanced over at Momo who was still staring up at the sky in wonderment and astonishment. The rocket launch touched Sakura in a particular way, and Sakura could see that it touched Momo in some way too.

 

 

 

 

By the time, they reached Sakura's house, night had fallen over the neighborhood. Sakura waved goodbye to Momo as Momo headed home, and felt a pang of sadness watching her leave.

 

As Sakura laid in bed, she finally came to terms with the truth.

 

Momo never looked at her.

 

She never did.

 

Sakura has known this for awhile now but foolishly turned a blind eye to it, believing things would somehow change when she achieved her goal. She truly believed something in the universe would click into place and aligned in such a way that it would make Sakura's wish come true as a reward for her hard work and determination. But time has moved forward and reality shattered the illusion Sakura created in her mind. Seeing the way Momo looked at her earlier at the convenience store was made Sakura realize that confessing to Momo would bring nothing.

 

No matter how much Sakura chased after her, she couldn't close the gap between her and Momo.

 

Because Momo was chasing after someone else.

 

She was searching for someone else.

 

Sakura couldn't be that person for Momo. She would never be that person.

 

But despite coming to terms with the truth, Sakura knew she'd never stop loving Momo. The intense ache in her heart was proof of that.

 

Tomorrow, the day after, and the many days that would follow after that, Sakura knew she would always be helplessly in love with Momo.

 

 

 

As Sakura cried herself to sleep, she hoped that she would dream about a universe where she and Momo were meant for each other.

---

Author Notes:

In case you wonder why Momo and Sakura refer to each other by their surnames, it's to show the depth of their friendship. While both drop formalities (not adding -san to the surname), their bond never deepened enough to the point they felt comfortable to call each other by their given names despite knowing each other for four years. This is also the case with Takaki and Kanae from the 5cm/s movie.

It's a big contrast to Momo and Mina where they refer to each other by their given names and without honorifics, something you can only do with someone you're really close to or otherwise it comes off very rude.