Awareness
A Thousand Miles (Revamped)Spinning around with a gasp, her mother lunged forward. Slamming the door shut, turned the lock, and yanked her further into the room.
Putting the phone back against her ear, she spoke at the speed of light, “I’ll call you back.” Wheeling around on her she scolded, “What are you doing here?!”
Namjoo stared at the stricken expression on her mother’s face. Emblazoned eyes. Panicked eyes.
Namjoo, in her heart, no matter how hard she searched, could not find an ounce of sympathy.
“You’re doing it again.” she merely stated.
Gripping her arm, her mother shook her. “You heard nothing! You will say nothing! Do you understand?!”
Flinging her arm away, Namjoo blasted, “Why are you doing this?! I thought you were satisfied with everything; that you were happy here! Is this…some sort of sick habit?!”
Her mother bit down on her teeth, in a breath, and curled her hands into tight fists. “This is not your problem. Where is your father? Why are you here?”
“Don’t change the topic!” Namjoo angrily said. Her brain was going to erupt. Her chest tightened. “Why are you two doing this?!”
She turned away to plaster her hands over her face. Not sure if she wanted to cry upon this shocking revelation or because it was happening all over again.
Was she just unlucky?
Grabbing her shoulders, her mother swiveled her around. “What are you talking about?” When she didn’t answer her mother shook her again. “I said tell me! What did you mean?”
Her brow dipped down her face. Helplessness made her weak. She quietly confessed, “I saw Jongin’s dad with a woman.”
“That bastard! I just knew it!” Namjoo’s head snapped toward her mother.
The abrupt despondency that had clouded over her turned into smoke. Resentment replaced her bout of emotions.
“If you two can’t own up to your vows, you shouldn’t have gotten married at all! You’re just two ed up people who can’t grow up!” Namjoo screamed.
Shoving past her mother she unlocked the door and stormed out.
⸛⸛⸛⸛⸛
Namjoo hardly spoke or looked at anyone in the family. She stayed the most far from their parents. Jongin at least noticed that.
After going to wash her hands she had disappeared for quite a long time. He had waited with his catch, eager to show off but Namjoo hadn’t returned, so he spent the rest of his time fishing alone.
It wasn’t what he expected when the day started, but now that night had fallen everything felt like some kind of waste. He’d wanted to joke around earlier, but Namjoo looked aloof and upset he hadn’t tried. Plus, it wasn’t like he hadn’t noticed Dami eyeing his every movement. Probably ready to tell on him.
That, too, worried him.
His father wouldn’t approve.
He would separate them.
No more contact with Namjoo. Maybe he would even contact the school to remove Namjoo from his class; place her elsewhere.
Jongin didn’t want it to be because of him.
Noticing a spark outside his window he sat up. Staring out the side window to see a figure lighting up the bonfire they had killed a few hours prior. Throwing the covers over Jongin grabbed his sweater and headed outside.
The day had been superbly warm, but night proved to be brutally chilly. Hugging himself he crossed the distance from the yard to the bonfire. The folding chairs they had brought surrounded the metal pit currently stocked with leftover log and ablaze.
“You planning to stay up all night?” Jongin asked sitting down beside Namjoo.
Sitting forward she hugged herself. Noticing he stood and went back inside to retrieve a blanket. One that belonged to the cabin, but he decided it probably didn’t matter. The area manager would take care of cleaning it for the next visitors.
“Here,” he wrapped it around her shoulders and returned to his seat. “It’d be regretful if you go back home sick.”
Clutching onto the blanket she gave him a tiny smile of thanks. His heart fluttered in reply. Orange red bounced off his face as the fire crackled. The flaming reflections shone very clearly in Namjoo’s eyes, because unlike her, he had taken the chance to stare.
“Do you miss your mom?” Namjoo wondered.
“Sometimes.” He said focusing on the fire now. “It happened a long time ago, but as each day passes, I feel like I’ve gradually accepted her death. Dami is another story though.”
“My mom,” Namjoo started, “what do you think about her?”
Jongin merely blinked. Not sure how to answer. “Honestly, I don’t know.”
“It’s strange, don’t you think?” Namjoo asked. “We’re supposed to be a family, but we hardly know each other. There’s nothing to glue us together.”
“I know you.”
They turned to look at each other. Her eyes were glassy. No fiery reflection in them, but he saw a tiny mirage of himself. She first turned away with what he thought was a really small smile.
“Is that what you were thinking about all day?” Jongin wondered.
“Well…” Namjoo connected her hands. “Yea…”
“How silly.” He commented.
Tilting her head back Namjoo’s mouth opened in awe, complimenting, “It’s pretty.”
Copying her he absorbed the night sky. Dainty white stars stretched throughout all the way into forever. Sparkling strongly. Bountiful nature allowing the beauty of the sky to shine here.
“I think that’s the Milky Way,” Namjoo pointed to a section of stars.
“Where?” he asked.
“Right there,” Namjoo emphasized the direction of her finger.
Jongin frowned unable to tell. All he saw was a splash of dotted whites scrambled all over the sky.
“Where?”
“There!” Namjoo pointed out. “Connect that dot and this dot.”
He laughed baffled, but listened to her explain to him about the formation of the stars. And he thought he was grateful their parents had married, bringing her into his life. Yet he also wished it had never happened.
Jongin stayed up with her into the late hours just listening to her talk. Simply content next to her as the fire burned in front of them until it slowly died.
They packed up the following morning and left for home early afternoon after eating.
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