‟chapter four

Eric sneezes for the nth time that morning, and he mentally curses himself for it. This can’t be another problem to ruin the performance, they already have enough trouble with the lack of practice. For Music Bank’s Christmas special, he was contacted by SM a month ago to perform a duet with Wendy, and he gladly accepted the offer. Wendy has helped him out a few time, and surprisingly enough, she was a good duet partner too so he didn’t see any reason to reject the offer. But, with how busy they both were respectively, they didn’t get to meet up and choose a song until last night at 1am. They eventually decided on one of her song without even getting the chance to make changes to the singing keys and he had no choice but to sing a female key that was way higher than his usual keys. They had almost little to no time to practice, so the best they could do was staying up the whole night to practice, and now neither of them could actually keep their eyes open before the recording. 

It wasn’t too bad for Wendy because, although she didn’t get to sleep last night, she didn’t catch any cold so she wasn’t having it that bad. Eric, however, caught the flu from traveling non-stop on his tour and last night’s lack of sleep took a complete toll on him. He took another sip of his Americano, hoping the coffee would helped a little before his manager came back with his medicines. 

It didn’t even help him out much when the door to their waiting room opened, and he found out that another singer who would be sharing a waiting room with them was someone he has been hoping to meet yet to also avoid. Yongsun was also invited to perform by herself, and she too was down with a flu and was coughing just as much as he was. 

They both froze when they saw each other and neither of them took the initiative to greet the other first. Eric wasn’t sure if he was hallucinating until Wendy’s excited greeting pulled him back, and he found himself mumbling a loud enough hello to her as well. Yongsun got herself together and greeted them back, but she found herself already starting to avoid his eyes.

    “Yongsun-ah, can you stay by yourself for awhile? I’ll go get you some more warm water for your throat.” 

She nodded, but she couldn’t really make out what her manager said. Wendy asked if she wasn’t feeling well, and Yongsun almost wished that Eric would be looking at them too, but instead he was just staring at something else on his phone and being completely oblivious to what they were talking about. Nodding her head, she told Wendy it was just a flu and that it wasn’t too bad. 

    “What will you be performing today?” The younger woman asked, and she looked awake for once today. “Eric Nam sunbaenim and I will be performing Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, but I think pulling an all nighter last night kinda took a toll on us right now.” 

Yongsun wasn’t sure how to reply, but she smiled anyway. Her gaze went over to Eric instead, and she couldn’t helped but noticed how exhausted he really looked and that very same image made her wanted to just hug him like she was able to in the past. She didn’t need to ask to know that he had just came back from his tour, and she knew it better than anyone else how exhausting it is to return from your tour and havinng to perform somewhere else right after. 

    “I felt bad that we have to stayed up the whole night to practice because we didn’t have enough time when he was supposed to be getting his sleep, he already has a bad flu.” 

    Eric joined them for once during the whole conversation. “Don't be. You’re probably just as exhausted.” 

He took a quick glance at Yongsun and was surprised to find her staring at him, and for a short moment, Eric wondered if that was really a frown he saw on her face. He cleared his throat awkwardly, and looked away. Wendy looked at both of them back and forth, then she gasped a little as if she had just remembered something. Intentionally, she excused herself and lied that she needs to go to the restroom.

They both watched as Wendy leaves the room and the awkward tension filled the already silence room. Yongsun fiddled with her fingers, her eyes landed on his usual cup of Americano and she hoped that was the first cup he had today. He was already sick enough, he shouldn’t just depend on coffee to get through his day. Making up her mind, she looked at him and prayed to herself that she wouldn’t sound too nervous and out of place when she spoke. 

    “Are you okay?” 

Eric looked at her in surprise, and it took him a short moment to register her small shaky voice. She looked nervous, almost a little too nervous but he could still worked the concern on her face. He almost wished she wouldn’t let him see that, he didn’t want to feel even the slightest hope for nothing again. 

    “Yeah,” He nodded and offered her a small smile. “It’s just a small flu. What about you?” 

    She nodded, half-relieved at his little smile. Shrugging, she repeated his words, “It’s just a small flu.”

They both went quiet again. Yongsun looked around the waiting room awkwardly, running out of things to say even though there were so many things she wanted to ask and so many things that she wanted to clarify. She contemplated apologizing for changing her number, but it would be too sudden and she knew she didn’t have enough courage to speak about it directly face-to-face. She wanted to tell him not to drink too much coffee, but she felt like it wasn’t her place to tell him what to do anymore. And, she wanted to know if by chances he still prefer his coffee just as she knew but afraid that he would think she was being nosy about his private life and preferences. 

The door to the waiting room saved both of them just in time, but they couldn’t deny that they were somewhat disappointed because now they’re no longer alone and they’ve just blew up their chances of start talking again. Both of their managers came in at the same time, and they almost envied their managers for still being casual with one another after all these time. Both Eric and Yongsun knew they befriended each other back when they had to wait for both of them during their wgm filming, but it didn’t make sense to them that they were the only one who couldn’t be the same around each other anymore after the filming is done. 

    “You should eat first before taking your medicine,” Yongsun’s manager said and handed her a packet of her medicines and a sandwich. “Also, you’ll be performing after Eric Nam and Wendy’s stage."

    “You should also eat before taking your medicine, hyung.” Eric’s manager said and handed him the same packet of medicines and sandwich. Both managers looked at each other and laughed. Eric and Yongsun looked at each other, then at their own managers and they sniggered, the situation was somewhat funny and ridiculous to them. Scratching his head, his manager said, "The pharmacist also suggested you two to never skip your meal and to not have any iced drinks for a while." 

Both Yongsun's and Eric's eyes land on the cup of iced Americano in his hand. Clearing his throat, he puts it back down on the table.

    “Do you two like each other?” Eric joked, and Yongsun laughed at how they panicked. 

Throwing a pillow at Eric, his manager denied almost a little too fast and told him to just eat his sandwich and took his medicine. 

    “If you get married, don’t forget to invite us. We’ll perform for free for you.” Yongsun added, and this time her manager was the one who panicked and told her to eat her food. 

    “You two are the worst when you’re together.” Their managers chorused, and they both only laughed and smugly ate their sandwiches. 

Yongsun was relieved that the little joke made them a little bit less awkward. They were soon called in to record a live backstage interview together, and Eric found himself absentmindedly standing closer to Yongsun than to Wendy even though he was performing with Wendy. His ears were on fire, but he didn’t care if anyone would notice them and called him out for it. For a moment, he thought he really went crazy for casually laughing over her singing Do You Want to Build a Snowman when they were being watched by the whole world, and for a moment, they both thought they were crazy enough to actually took turns stealing glances at each other in front of the camera. 

But, they didn’t really care. They’ve waited two years for this, the world should at least allowed them for once.