Today was just not Jessica’s day.  Neither was any other day lately if she was completely honest.  She had been in the US just six months after leaving Girls’ Generation and already she had met with at least fifteen different potential investors for her company.  Most wouldn’t look at her because she didn’t have the initial capital behind her to start the business, but the handful that did agree to meet with her didn’t sign for other reasons: the owner of one company had passed away and the heir didn’t want to commit; one had a premonition in a dream that the business was going to flop; one was even advised by a fortune cookie.  And it wasn’t even the generic “You should avoid making financial decisions this month” kind of fortune, but rather a scarily specific “You should avoid investing in Jessica Jung’s business as it will bankrupt you” kind of fortune.  The guy even showed her the slip of paper that the fortune was printed on.

The same was going for her possible recording career.  None of the major labels wanted to touch her because of potential contract rifts with SM Entertainment since she wasn’t officially out of contract yet, and the independent labels that were prepared to sign her in a preemptive contract met similar fates as the investors.  The latest one had had his entire recording studio torn apart by two dozen polar bears.  Although what two dozen polar bears were doing in the sunny climes of Los Angeles confused Jessica no end.  They had even taken to painting the walls in black tar: “Jessica Jung will destroy you.”

The warnings were clear – Jessica was not to be touched by anyone.

She turned off the ignition and sat in her car in the underground parking lot of her apartment building.  She had been leasing the topmost apartment in this affluent LA district tower since she arrived, and it was fast looking like she would be leaving already.  It was a shame, really. She had already made this her home.

She took one last look around her, seeing the parked cars of the other residents in their respective spots, took the key from the ignition and left her car, heading straight for the elevator.

Well, at least today couldn’t get much worse at home, she reasoned.  And she was home a whole hour earlier than planned.

Early enough to catch her boyfriend with the maid in the living room.

Without a second thought, she turned and ran, heading straight for the elevator.  She pressed for the parking lot just as Tyler managed to get to the front door and left him behind.  How could he do this?  He was the encouragement she had taken the leap to start her business, to go it alone, to leave SM Entertainment entirely. He had convinced her to look for investors, for new labels, for new management.  She had all the support she could have wanted with SM and now she was throwing it all away.  The last pillar of strength she had to call on in her new life crumbled underneath her.  She could feel herself plummeting into nothingness, and she knew it would hurt when she hit the ground.

She headed back to her car, the ignition and sped out of the complex, turning right at the exit and headed straight on, giving no heed to where she was going.  Her gut led her down side streets, along meandering roads, coastal routes and straight highways.  She didn’t think, she didn’t consider her destination, she just drove until she could drive no more, until she could no longer hold back the tears and the anger that had consumed her.  As she pulled over, some hours later, she had no idea where she was, or even if she was still in California.  She wasn’t in LA, she was sure of that.  She looked around for signs to tell her where she was.

Carlsbad.

She had been driving for so long that she had left the city completely.  She shook her head and left the car, looking around at the sun as it was beginning to set on the horizon.

"Where did my life go wrong?" she asked nobody in particular.  She slumped onto the hood of the car and sighed, watching people passing by.  There was a couple walking a small puppy along the shore, and a group of teens sitting at the bus stop opposite, laughing and joking among themselves.  The odd vehicle passed by without as much as a thought for the damsel facing her personal distress.  She sighed again and turned around.

In her moment of need and desperation, it amused her that she would have stopped outside a church; the one place those who are lost would turn for guidance.

She made sure the car was locked and the top was up, and headed inside.  The large wooden doors were open, but the chapel was almost empty.  A handful of people sat in the pews.  A couple were clearly priests at the church - their garments gave that away.  She sat close to the rear of the church, removed her sunglasses, bowed her head in respect and reverence, and silently prayed.

"Lord, please give me guidance to find my way through this.  Give me the strength to tackle the challenges you place before me, give me the understanding to quell my anger and frustration when I falter, and ..."

"And give her a pink glittery pony and a big bowl full of Rainbow Drops for her pet unicorn," a familiar voice interrupted her.

Jessica looked up at her surprise companion.

"Taeyeon?"

Her former bandmate smirked and took the empty space next to her.  "I saw a car parked outside," she explained softly.  "Something told me it would be yours."

Jessica hugged her friend.  "What are you doing here?" she whispered, mindful of her volume in this hallowed chapel.  "I thought you'd be in Seoul promoting your new album!"

Taeyeon shrugged.  "I had this feeling you'd need me."  She looked around a little, gesturing at their surroundings.  "I think I guessed right."

"Wait," Jessica frowned, "how did you even find me?  How could you know I was here?"

She leant closer and whispered, "Magic."

Jessica rolled her eyes and pushed back playfully at her companion.  "Whatever.  Let's get out of here," she whispered.  "We've got a lot of catching up to do, and I could do with someone to talk to."

 

"Wow," Taeyeon mused half-heartedly.  "That ."

"''?"

"Well, yeah."  She slurped on her frappuccino.  The empty street-side parking lot provided the pair with some secrecy as they sat in the car.  The odd person passed on the sidewalk, but nobody paid them any attention.

"Tae, my future is wasted.  Every investor has left me, no label will sign me, and I don't even have an agent."

"And Tyrone has been screwing the maid behind your back."

Jessica sighed.  "Tyler."

"Whatever," she chuckled.

Jessica looked at her through narrowed eyes.  "What is wrong with you?"

"Who, me?" she pointed to herself with innocence in her eyes.

"Yes, you."

"What did I do?"

"I'm telling you how my life is falling apart and all you have is 'That '?"

"It ... the big hairy meatball?"

"No!"

" to be you?"

"No!"

"It ... both and blows?"

"Can you leave out of this for one minute?"

"What about blowing?"

"No blowing, no , no doing anything with your mouth."  Jessica cupped her face with her hands.  "God, Taeyeon, what am I going to do?"  There was silence as she wiped her hands down her face and glanced at her former leader.

Who now looked to be speaking in sign language.

"Seriously, girl?" Jessica snapped.

"You said I couldn't do anything with my mouth!" she chortled.

"Ugh!" Jessica threw her head back into the seat rest and sighed.

"Babe, you knew this was going to be tough."

"If this is tough, then SM was like summer camp."

"Drama queen."

"It was hell."

"Nah.  That was nothing.  Hell's a lot worse than that."

She shook her head and looked at her friend.  "What do I do?" she asked, exasperated.

Taeyeon shrugged.  "How much do you want this?"

"Are you kidding?  I'd give anything for this.  I'd sell my soul for this." She sat back in her seat.

Taeyeon mused silently for a moment.  "Agent ... business investors ... money ... fame ... you'd sell your soul for all that?"

"It's my life," Jessica explained.  "I love music, and I love performing.  I want to do it for as long as I can.  And it's been my dream to run a fashion business ever since I was a little girl.  This could be my big break.  I could be the Korean Coco Chanel or Donatella Versace!"

"With or without the surgery?"

Jessica glowered at her companion.

"It makes a difference," she defended, "do you want to look like a melting Mrs Potato Head or not?"

Jessica laughed.

"I bet Hasbro is really pissed at that, though," she stared out of the window, wistfully.

Jessica sighed as the laughter left her body.  She didn't have the energy to be upset any longer.  She was resigned to accept that she just wouldn't get her break as a business owner or as a solo artist.

"Do you mean that?"

"Mean what?" she asked.

"You really want to make it big?"

Jessica nodded.

"Enough that you'd sell your soul?"

She sighed.  "I guess.  But," she perked up sarcastically, "I don't see the Devil around here, so I'm flat out of luck."

"No, you're not," Taeyeon sang.

"Huh?"

Taeyeon smirked sideways.  "What if I told you,” she teased, “that I was the Devil?"

"Ok, very funny, Tae."

"I'm not joking."

Jessica looked at the woman sitting next to her.  She didn't look like she was joking; she looked rather smug, actually.  Although she looked smug when she was joking too, so who could tell?

"I can make all of your problems disappear, and all I ask for in exchange is your tiny little soul."

She rolled her eyes.  "Thanks, oh 'Satan'," Jessica mocked, "but I think I've had enough for today."

"You said you wanted it," she looked at the honey brunette, a genuinely confused expression crossing her youthful features.

"I do, but I'm not in the mood for games."

"Games?"

"Taeyeon, I appreciate your ... 'kind offer', no matter how sarcastic it was, but I need big girl answers right now," she sat upright and brushed her hair back.  She checked the view ahead of her and took a deep breath.  "Thanks for listening to me though.  I should head back.  I think that jackass should have left by now."

Taeyeon nodded thoughtfully and opened the car door.  "Think about it then."

"You don't want me to give you a ride somewhere?"

"Nah, it's cool.  I've got a ride somewhere else anyway."

"You sure?"

Taeyeon nodded.

"Ok ... well ... it was good to see you again."

"Yeah."

Jessica smiled.  "Let's not make it too long next time."

"Don't worry," she prophesied.  "We'll see each other real soon"

Jessica flashed her a smile as she moved out of the way of the car and drove away, stopping to set the GPS as she pulled out of the lot.